Complete Works of F. Scott Fitzgerald (Illustrated) (467 page)

PRIVATE W.: Excuse me, lady.

(Exit Private Willings.)

LINDY: Well, did you enlist?

JIM: Almost. I tossed a coin to see which army I’d join.

LINDY: Horrors! Who won?

JIM: Don’t be afraid, the South won me.

LINDY: And did you enlist?

JIM: Well, the recruiting officer had fled south with the Southern army, so I thought I’d try the Yanks, but they had a picture in a book on the table —

LINDY: A picture?

JIM: All blood. It was a battle. And — and then I realized that I’d better wait and join the other side, so I told the man to wait for me.

LINDY: Mr. Jim Holworthy, never speak to me again! I told my family I had influenced you to enlist, and — and — they believed me, and now you didn’t! I think you are contemptible —

JIM: Excuse me.

(Enter Judge Douglas wheeled by Jeff.)

JUDGE D.: What’s this? What’s this? Tell me, what’s this? On my honor it’s the worm!

JIM: Worm?

JUDGE D.: You impertinent young scamp, calling on my daughter.

I’ll — I’ll cane you! Jeff — my cane! Wheel me at him! (
Jeff starts to wheel and Jim retreats.)

JIM: Oh Judge Douglas, be reasonable.

LINDY: Father, you’ll have a fit! Remember your liver is in poor condition.

JIM: Look out, Judge, there ain’t anything like a good liver.

JUDGE D.: What do you know about my liver? Lindy did you ever mention my liver to him?

LINDY: Never, Father — (
Cautioning.)
But your liver —

JUDGE D.: Bother my liver.

JIM: Well, don’t bother me.

(Enter Angelina.)

ANGELINA: A family disagreement? How perfectly shocking. Our family never squabble.

JUDGE D.: What’s this? Do you, young lady, mean to dictate to me in my own house? —

LINDY: GO slow, Father.

ANGELINA: Oh the Bangs in me is rising. Oh can I stop it? Can I?

(Struggle.)
There. I have conquered it. Angeline stands victorious.

JUDGE D.: What’s this? Bangs, Angelina? Why the Bangs in you is the best part of you. Why Georgie Bangs ever married that patron saint mother of yours beats me. And you (
turning to Jim),
you’re a pair — I can’t control myself — I’ll burst! Wheel me out Jeff — No, don’t! Go ahead! Young sir — Stop! If I ever — Keep going! — see you again — Stop I say! I’ll — I’ll thrash you —

(Exit Judge Douglas, growling, wheeled by Jeff.)

ANGELINA: His words are blasphemous. I am shocked. I will return home and pray that he will never regret this moment.
(Exit.)

JIM:
(Sings.)
“Throw out the life line.” He ain’t pleasant somehow. You know, he doesn’t love me.

LINDY: NO he doesn’t.
(Whistle heard outside.)
That’s my brother’s whistle that we used when we were children. He’s — he’s in the house! He’s coming back! Heavens!! And the Yankees everywhere. Oh Charley, Charley.
(Whistles.)
Where’s the sentry?

JIM: On the other end of the veranda.

(Enter Charley.)

LINDY: Charley, what brings you here? The Yankees are all around the house. There is a guard on the doorstep. Oh go, before it is too late.

CHARLEY: I came back for —

JIM:
(Stepping up.)
Howdy do, Charley.

(Charley snubs him.)

CHARLEY: So this is your resource when your friends are in the army? — this — this stay-at-home!

LINDY: We won’t quarrel now.

CHARLEY: I’m sorry, Lindy. But I must hurry. I mislaid that money. Where is it?

LINDY: Here it is. (
Gets money from under cover.)
Take it and go!

(Voice outside.)

CAPT. O.: Has no one gone in or out?

LINDY:
(TO Charley, motioning him to door.)
Quick! Go out here.

(Exit Charley.)

(Enter Captain Ormsby.)

CAPT. O.: Good morning, Miss Douglas; my duty is most unpleasant. There is a man concealed here. My sergeant saw a horseman ride through the gap and leave his horse in the woods. He was seen entering here.

LINDY: I’m afraid you are mistaken.

CAPT. O.: I sincerely hope so. Still, I am forced to assure myself of it.

LINDY: There is no one here.

CAPT. O.: You will kindly stand aside. It is hardly my pleasure to disobey a lady.

(Enter Charles Douglas, revolver in hand.)

CHARLEY: I will save you that trouble. Hands up, Captain.

CAPT. O.:
(Raises hands.)
I have men at this very doorstep. I have but to raise my voice.

CHARLEY: And you’ll be raising it with the angel chorus, or as you are a Yankee, contrarywise, if you say another word.

LINDY: Charley, what shall I do?
(Pulling him to side.)

CHARLEY:
(Aside to Lindy.)
I’ll have to hide here. Get him out of here first.
(To Yankee.)
Yank, right about face. You walk from here right down to the gate without looking behind. A sign to your men and you go —
(Still pointing pistol at him.)

CAPT. O.: Your chances are one in a million.

CHARLEY: NO remarks. March!

(Exit Captain Ormsby.)

LINDY: Quick — open this. (
Pointing to chest.)
Charley, quick — get in. Now slam that door,
(to Jim)

(Voices heard outside, and tramping.)

CAPT. O.: Here they are.

(Enter Capt. Ormsby, Private Willings, and Private Barkis.)

Quick — Through the house! He can’t get away.

(Exit Privates.)

(Turning to Jim.)
So you’re a pal of his, are you? In plain clothes — You’ll swing for this. He’s in uniform — lucky beggar.

JIM: NO, I ain’t.

CAPT. O.: And you, young lady, may have to eat prison fare for a while. This is high treason.

LINDY: YOU dare — you —

JIM: Let him alone, Miss Lindy. He’ll get mad.

(Enter Private Willings.)

PRIVATE W.: NO trace of him, sir. Three men are still searching. He must be here.

CAPT. O.: I’ll get that fresh Reb. Where is he? — Tell me!

LINDY: Do you think you can frighten me?

CAPT. O.: Here is a man we can.
(Going towards Jim.)
If you are wise you will say.

JIM: I — I — he —

LINDY: Jim!

CAPT. O.: Where is he?

JIM: I don’t know.

CAPT. O.:
(To soldier.)
Give this fellow a lash or two and then — Well, there are ropes in camp.

(Soldier grabs Jim.)

JIM: Don’t! I — I —

CAPT. O.: Hurry.

LINDY: Jim!

JIM: I — oh, I can’t!

CAPT. O.: Away with him.

JIM: Stop! I’ll tell. He’s — he’s in there.
(Pointing to chest. Soldier
springs to it and takes out Charley.)

CHARLEY: YOU damn coward!

CAPT. O.:
(To Jim.)
Here — Here’s a quarter. Southern manhood!

LINDY:
(Crying.)
Goodbye Charley. Oh, my brother.

CHARLEY: I’m only a prisoner of war, Lindy.

CAPT. O.: Right about face — March!

(Exit Captain Ormsby, Charles Douglas and Private Willings.)

JIM: Gee, they’re taking him away! They almost took me. Well, that’s over. What’s the matter? Why — why — you ain’t mad, are you, Miss Lindy? I — I — oh, I see, I shouldn’t have told, but I didn’t know. I didn’t — as God sees me, I didn’t! I was afraid. Speak to me, Miss Lindy. I just had to tell! Oh, don’t think I’m a — traitor. Don’t, Miss Lindy — Don’t! — oh don’t!
(Stiffens “p.)
I reckon I see now. I’m a — a what he called me, a coward!

(Pause.)
Goodbye, I’m going now, south to the army. I see now, I’m — I’m — Goodbye, Miss Lindy — Goodbye.

(Lindy turns and leaves him without an answer.)

(Curtain.)

ACT II

(Scene same as Act I, and three years later.)

(Curtain rises showing Jeff setting table. He gets milk in a jug and fills two glasses half full. Then he gets water jug and fills up the rest of the glasses. Surveys his table. Places four crackers at plates. Then puts flowers in center. Something is lacking so he removes four flowers and places them at each plate. Surveys table again with satisfaction.)

(Enter Mrs. Douglas.)

MRS. D.: Good morning, Jeff.

JEFF: Mawnin’, Mrs. Douglas.
(Hints at table with evident pride.)

MRS. D.: What’s this?

JEFF: De — de luncheon, Mrs. Douglas.

MRS. D.: YOU surely don’t expect us to eat flowers.

JEFF: No’m — No’m — You kin if you wants to, but I don’t advise you to. Dey’s not good to eat, ‘ceptin’ maybe cauliflower or bakin’ flour.

MRS. D.: And is there nothing else in the ice house?

JEFF: Oh, yassum — Yessam — Dey’s lots! Dey’s — ah — three or four pieces of bread and one of ‘em still pretty good. An — an — half a jug o’ milk, an — an — a egg an — a apple — All that!

MRS. D.: I reckon we’re mighty poor, Jeff.

JEFF: Don’t talk that way, Mrs. Douglas! Dat ain’t no way to talk. Times’ll mend — but dis here coat won’t.

MRS. D.: Yes, it is well to be hopeful, but I trust the horrible war is almost over. Since the Judge died we’ve been pretty poor, and Charley, though he has escaped so far, is still there.

JEFF: But you got a daughter.

MRS. D.: Poor Lindy! Having to give up all and become a school teacher. She practically supports us now, Jeff.

JEFF: Ah expect dey’ll be a heap o’ offers for her when de young men gits home from de wah.

MRS. D.: Jeff — You mustn’t talk that way.

JEFF: Yassum — Excuse me. (
Goes to window.)
Dere’s Miss Lindy now.

(Exit Jeff.)

(Enter Lindy and Cecilia.)

LINDY: Hello, Mother.
(Removes shawl and hat.)

CECILIA: Good morning, Mrs. Douglas.

MRS. D.: Good morning, Celia.

CECILIA: I met Lindy on the way back from her schoolhouse, surrounded by a most adoring crowd of little nuisances. I rescued her, and here we are.

MRS. D.: Did you have a good day, Lindy?

LINDY: Fine, Mother. I think it will be all right now that that Tompkins boy has decided to behave. Mrs. Tompkins sent a note with him this morning authorizing me to punish him to the fullest extent of the law, and when I punish! — I tell you, Mother, I’m growing strong.

MRS D.: Oh, if Charley were only here to take the burden of supporting us off your shoulders.

CECILIA: I reckon he will soon. Our army is getting weaker and weaker. They’re going to make a stand at Appomattox, so Eddie Randolph wrote his mother.

LINDY: We haven’t seen Charley for two years.

MRS. D.: I miss him, oh, how I miss him!

LINDY: We can only wait for him. I’ll be back, Celia.

(Exit Lindy.)

CECILIA: YOU are not the only one who misses him.

MRS. D.: Celia, I thought so! So you are engaged?

CECILIA: He has asked me to marry him. He wrote me and said that his first duty was to you. He spoke also of Captain Holworthy. He was awarded a medal at the battle of Petersburg.

MRS. D.: Holworthy? Jim Holworthy?

CECILIA: Yes, I reckon he’s changed some. He wasn’t very popular when he left here, but somehow he joined the army, and he has proved himself.

MRS. D.: But does Charley like him after what happened that time three years ago in this very house, when he was captured through this Holworthy’s cowardice?

CECILIA: Charley bears no resentment. Holworthy has saved his life since then. I’m sure I’m willing to accept him as all right if he comes home.

MRS. D.: Perhaps you’re right.

CECILIA: And Mrs. Douglas, Charley wrote something else about him — a curious thing — The day Holworthy saved his life — it was in a skirmish — he was wounded slightly, and Charley, in “nbuttoning his collar to give him air, saw a locket spring open that he was wearing around his neck. Before he closed it he noticed the picture inside. Holworthy saw that Charley knew, and blushed, saying it was a hobby of his. But Charley knew that Captain Holworthy was carrying Lindy’s picture. I’ve often wondered if she has forgiven him.