Come as You Are (58 page)

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Authors: Emily Nagoski

BOOK: Come as You Are
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Attachment.
See
Love/attachment
Austen, Jane,
159
Avoidance behaviors.
See What the hell is this?
behaviors
Avoidant attachment style,
139
–40,
141
Backdraft,
182
Bacon, Linda,
169
Bancroft, John,
4
,
48
Barbarella
(film),
287
Bartholin’s glands,
30
Beach, Frank,
230
,
231
Beauty, recognizing one’s own,
162
–65
Becoming Orgasmic
(Heiman and LoPiccolo),
266
Behavioral view of sex,
3
–5
Bergner, Daniel,
75
,
135
,
206
Berridge, Kent,
86
Blast from the Past
(film),
301
Blastocysts,
20
Blum, Deborah,
135
Body scans,
122
Body self-criticism,
153
–54,
156
,
163
–67,
187
,
329
,
353
n
4
clinging to,
166
–67,
177
cognitive dissonance
vs.,
182
consequences of,
163
self-compassion
vs.,
177
–78
Bonobo copulation, images of,
194
,
207
,
208
Bottom-up approach to coping with trauma,
128
–29
Brain,
40
arousal nonconcordance and,
197
–99,
221
–22
context and,
75
–76,
80
–83,
94
desire and,
233
–34
dual control model and,
48
,
60
imaging studies of,
132
pleasure centers of,
84
stress and,
117
–18
Brain stem parabrachial nucleus,
84
Breathing technique,
268
Brotto, Lori,
238
–39
Buck, Ross,
199
Bulb of penis,
22
Bulb of vestibule,
22
,
274
–75
Camilla (composite),
7
,
149
,
326
arousal nonconcordance and,
191
–92,
221
context and,
70
–71,
92
–93
cultural messages and,
161
–62
desire and,
225
,
228
–29
dual control model and,
58
–59
on genital diversity,
33
–34
orgasm and,
278
–79,
314
–15
trauma and,
126
–27
Carpopedal spasms,
44
Central nervous system,
48
,
197
–99
Challenges, meaningful,
246
–47
Chamberlin, Kristen,
129
Chasing dynamic,
89
,
226
,
238
,
318
described,
245
desperate measures to defuse,
251
–55
Chivers, Meredith,
194
,
210
Christmas Carol, A
(Dickens),
145
–46
Chronic stressors,
120
–21
Circumcision (male),
26
Clitoral hood,
22
,
23
Clitoris,
19
,
20
–25,
44
anatomy of,
17
,
20
–23,
22
distance between urethra and,
16
,
274
early scientific view of,
277
manual exploration of,
23
orgasm through stimulation of,
272
,
274
,
275
,
292
,
322
size of,
15
–16,
205
–6
visual exploration of,
23
–25,
41
Cocaine addicts, study of,
90
Coffey, Kelly,
168
–69
Cognitive-based therapy,
128
Cognitive dissonance,
156
,
182
Common humanity,
178
,
317
Conception-arousal myth,
210
,
276
,
277
Condoms,
219
,
220
Context,
5
–6,
70
–108.
See also
Cultural context; Emotional context
arousal nonconcordance and,
212
–13
desire and,
223
–29,
239
dual control model and,
65
,
67
–68,
78
–79,
92
importance of understanding,
91
–92
meta-emotions and,
322
–23
orgasm and,
270
–71,
280
,
282
–86
placebo effect and,
47
pleasure and,
291
,
302
sensation and,
77
–83,
94
two elements in,
75
worksheets,
95
–108
Corpora cavernosa,
21
,
22
Corpus spongiosum,
21
,
22
Cosmopolitan
(magazine),
161
Cowper’s gland,
30
Criterion velocity,
235
–36,
281
,
289
,
300
changing,
320
–21
defined,
235
Crura of clitoris,
21
,
22
Crura of penis,
22
Crying,
122
,
137
–38,
290
Cues for sexual desire
study,
72
–73
worksheet,
107
–8
Cujo
(film),
194
Cultural context,
6
,
153
–88.
See also
Body self-criticism; Media Message; Medical Message; Moral Message
the clitoris in,
21
desire and,
243
–44
disgust and,
156
,
170
–77,
188
dual control model and,
62
media literacy and,
183
–84
self-compasion and,
177
–81
self-trust and,
184
–87
stress response cycle and,
120
–21,
146
the vulva in,
26
weight and,
167
–70,
187
Cum hoc ergo propter hoc
fallacy,
211
Curiosity,
226
,
237
–38,
241
,
296

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