Coach Maddie and the Marine (11 page)

Even if it took him months of begging and cajoling, she was going to be his wife.

Sooner or later.

When he set his sights on something, he didn’t give up. Ever.

Chapter Eleven

Son of a bitch.

The Marine Corps wanted to give him a Bronze Star for his failure.

After all this time, they’d found a letter, buried deep in his file. His commanding officer at the time of Frank’s death had written it to recommend David for a Bronze Star, one of the most prestigious awards in the Armed Services. He wished the correspondence had been lost forever.

Heat crept up the back of his neck, all the way across his scalp.

The Bronze Star was supposed to be for heroism. Not a disaster.

Since the ambush that killed Frank, the Corps had always maintained that it wasn’t David’s fault. That he’d acted according to his orders and that no one could’ve predicted the outcome. That Frank’s death was just a part of the cost of war.

He had been a marine long enough to know that the Corps wasn’t above covering its own ass. So no matter how they chose to spin the incident, in his heart, he knew it was his fault. No one could convince him otherwise.

All he wanted was to get his walking papers and start a new life, on the civilian side of the fence.

He wasn’t going to accept the medal. He would refuse it.

He wanted no reminders of that day.

Maddie was also a reminder.

In his head, he told himself that he wanted no reminders, but there was something about her that he couldn’t let go, couldn’t let pass.

Was his attraction to her just another facet of his survivor’s guilt?

A run. He needed a long, punishing run to clear his head.

Three miles into his jog, he felt no better.

He’d made up his mind that he’d decline the award, but Maddie was another story altogether.

The rage and hurt he’d been carrying around since Robert’s death had worn him to the bone. The guilt he’d been carrying around since Frank’s death had blasted holes in his soul.

There was only one thing that helped him to forget: Maddie.

Every time he saw her he wanted her more. He was falling and he couldn’t stop himself. The attraction had begun with those perfect breasts and green eyes, but he’d come to realize over the past few days that it was much more than a physical thing. She was bright and picked up quickly on the smallest details. She gave her heart and soul to her clients, working to make sure they had a support system. Then there was her strong sense of commitment, to Andrew, Callie, and the Camp Wilson Pirates.

When he first offered to help with the team, he was afraid that he’d do most of the coaching, but he was pleased to see how hard she worked to mold herself into a good coach. Most people would have just thrown up their hands, but not her. She had grit and determination, two qualities he greatly admired.

Not that he had a chauvinistic bone in his body, but that woman could cook. Those pork chops were southern perfection. She was everything he’d ever hoped to find in a woman.

He settled into the run, kept pushing himself. He wound through the streets of Fort Wilson, soaked with sweat, embracing the endorphins pumping through his veins, hoping they’d clear his thinking.

His single-minded intent on exacting revenge had given him tunnel vision. While getting Robert’s murderer squarely in the cross-hairs had been his main focus, it had been a fool’s errand. An impossible goal. The loss of Frank Westerfield changed everything.

The day played over and over in his head like a film. The sun, the dust, the sharp smell of gunfire.

By the time he’d gotten to Frank, it was too late. The only thing he could do was bring him out, get his body back to the operating base. He’d thrown Frank on his back and half walked, half crawled back to the base.

Even in the warm sun, he shivered.

He had to make the movie stop. Once and for all.

It was time to build a new foundation. To start again.

He wasn’t sure he could make a new go of things with Maddie as his partner.

Which really sucked.

His heart squeezed at the thought of leaving her behind in order to have a new life.

When he’d been faced with choosing a professional football contract over exacting vengeance for his brother, he’d done what felt like the honorable thing. When he’d been faced with leaving Frank behind, he’d chosen to get his body back to the operating base no matter the cost.

He was sick and tired of making hard decisions.

Maddie was the kind of woman who came along once in a lifetime. She was the only woman he wanted in his life.

But now, the letter his commanding officer had written all those years ago was bringing back all the guilt. Block by block, he felt the wall rebuilding itself.

He hoped his shoes had enough miles left to work out the tangle of knots in his head.

...

Maddie tried to call David on her way to pick up Andrew from school. When he didn’t answer, she left a message on his voicemail inviting him over for dinner. He didn’t call Monday night. And while she was peeved, she told herself that something had come up at work. She’d see him at practice tomorrow night.

On Tuesday morning, she went to the market and picked up several containers of ice cream, and threw some Gatorade bottles into her cart. She had no idea how she was going to run all those laps. Her only hope was that the boys might forget about it.

Fat chance.

“You’ve got some laps to run, Coach,” Henry said as soon as she blew the whistle to start the practice.

“So you didn’t forget?” she asked. “Here’s how we’re going to do this. As soon as Coach Sterling gets here, he’ll get everyone started on drills. At the end of practice, I’ll run my laps and y’all can eat the ice cream in the cooler.”

Unless her watch was running fast, David was already five minutes late. If he didn’t show up in a few more minutes, she’d call him. Maybe he’d just forgotten practice.

Three phone calls, two to his cell and one to his apartment, went unanswered.

Thirty minutes later, she had the boys practicing blocks.

“Is Coach Sterling coming to practice, or not?” one kid asked.

“I can’t get in touch with him, boys, so the laps will have to wait until the next practice.” She tried to keep the worry out of her voice.

“Awwww. No fair.”

“Then we’ll all run a few laps together.”

“Awww, Coach,” they complained.

She and the boys jogged around the track. After the fourth lap, she heard the boys near the back of the group complaining. Normally, she would have given them another lap, but she was too preoccupied, so she called an end to the practice and passed out the ice cream.

In the car on the way home, she dialed David’s number several times.

She was beginning to get worried. It had been two days since she’d heard from him.

If she didn’t hear from him tomorrow, she’d try to find his office on base.

He ought to know better than to make her worry like this.

Wherever he was, he could take the time to call.

...

The boys won the game on Saturday, this time by a wider margin. The boys were sorely disappointed that Coach Sterling hadn’t been there to see their win.

Disappointed wasn’t the word for what she felt. She was afraid. And mad. And though it hurt to admit it, heartbroken.

What if he had to go on some special assignment? What if something had happened to him? Was he okay? Would anyone get in touch with her?

Why would they?

Her heart began to race, the feeling all too familiar. She fought the tears welling in her eyes.

She should’ve known better.

After the night they spent together, he’d promised. Promised to come home to her. And now he was MIA.

She forced herself to take several deep breaths and refocus her mind. She was assuming the worst, but maybe there was a simpler explanation.

David didn’t strike her as a liar, but admittedly, she didn’t have a lot of dating experience. Maybe he was just avoiding her.

On Monday, she tracked down the phone number to his office. She met with stiff resistance. She was told curtly that Lt. Sterling wasn’t in the office, but she could leave a message. As for when he might be back in the office, no one seemed to have any idea.

She declined to leave a message since she’d already left several on his cell phone and on his home answering machine.

Chasing him was like chasing a ghost.

...

No one in the Marine Corps was listening.

David had gone up the chain of command, one by one, until he was so frustrated he could scream.

Apparently no one had ever refused a Bronze Star before.

There wasn’t a procedure and when the Corps didn’t have a procedure, it was hard work convincing them they needed one.

He didn’t deserve the award and he couldn’t face Maddie with it on his chest. Until he got out of the award, he didn’t even feel like he could talk to her, explain that even with all the time that had passed, all the thinking he’d done about the deaths of Frank and Robert, he wasn’t sure he could ever leave the guilt and pain behind.

Maddie deserved a man who could love her totally and completely without the specter of two deaths hanging over his head. He loved her too much to let her love a half-man.

He’d been avoiding her calls. He needed time to figure out how he was going to explain the award. How he was going to explain that even though he was madly in love with her, he couldn’t be with her.

Maddie.

What the hell had he been thinking?

He should’ve never gotten involved. He should’ve never agreed to help with the team.

He
never
should’ve slept with her.

His heart squeezed. Not only would he miss Maddie, he’d miss Andrew, too. He’d thought about nothing else since he’d gotten the notification that he was receiving the award. There was no way he could be with her and forget.

And as much as he wanted both, he had to forget.

He had to move forward, no matter the cost.

...

Maddie jumped when the phone rang. She grabbed the phone. “Hello?” Her voice cracked and she crossed the fingers on her left hand.

“I’m so glad I caught you.”

“Oh. Callie. Hey.”

The connection was crackly, making Callie’s voice sound almost robotic. “Sorry I disappointed you. Geez, who did you think was calling?”

“You didn’t disappoint me. I didn’t mean to sound that way. How are things?”

“Same as always. Long, hot days filled with hurt, sick soldiers. But I don’t want to talk about that. I’m calling with good news. I’m coming home a little early. I’ll be heading to another base in Europe to be debriefed, and then I’ll be flying home.”

“That’s the best news in the world. When will you be here?”

“Two weeks. I’ll call you when I get all the details.”

“Andrew is going to be thrilled.” Relief and joy of her own made a lump form in her throat. “I’ve got to go now, sis. But kiss my boy for me and I’ll see you both soon. I love you.”

“I love you, too. Stay safe.”

“I will.” Callie hung up the line.

Andrew was ecstatic when he heard the good news.

“In only a couple of weeks? I can’t believe it.” He jumped up and down on the kitchen floor like a human pogo stick. She hadn’t seen this kind of joy on his face since the Christmas morning when Santa left him an Xbox 360. “I have to get my scrapbook ready. It has to be finished when she gets home. Will you help me with it?”

“We’ll work on it all weekend. After your game, that is.” Truth be told, she wanted to join him in jumping up and down. She needed a distraction to keep her from obsessing about David, and focusing on the happiness of Callie coming home soon would help.

She hoped.

The game on Saturday morning was another easy win for the boys. Maddie was beginning to get into the rhythm of coaching. And also starting to understand the subtle nuances of the game that only time and experience can teach. Best of all, the boys were responding to her.

When they realized she was serious about cutting their playing time if they broke the rules, they’d all become perfect little gentlemen. They were beginning to trust her football instincts on what plays to run and when to call time-outs.

She liked coaching so much that she’d already signed up for next season.

After a pizza lunch, she and Andrew sat down in the middle of the living room floor with the scrapbook supplies.

Andrew flipped to the page that celebrated his touchdown in the first game and her heart clenched. She’d been foolish to think things were going to be like that forever.

But she refused to be sad. It had been a wonderful day and Callie was coming home in only fourteen days. Then her sister would be safe in her little house right down the street and her family would finally be whole again.

Andrew cut and pasted all afternoon. He crafted pages on school, football, and the fun things they had done together while Callie was away. He also made pages on his friends and the neighborhood.

“Your mom’s going to love this, kiddo.”

“Do you really think so?”

She nodded. “I know so. It’s such a great way to tell her about all the things that happened over the last year, and she can keep it forever. It will make her feel like she didn’t miss too much.”

“Thanks, Aunt Maddie.”

“Let’s clean this mess up and then we’ll watch a movie. How would you like to stay up as late as you want?”

“Can I?”

“Only this one time, and only because we’re celebrating. Is that a deal?”

“Deal,” he answered eagerly.

They swept up the slivers of paper and vacuumed up the glitter. Then they curled up on the couch to watch the latest Pixar DVD release.

Andrew was asleep before the movie reached the halfway point.

...

Eight games. She’d made it through the entire season.

As soon as the final buzzer rang, signaling the end of the championship game, the boys erupted into a cheer. Maddie looked at the scoreboard, a flimsy cardboard sign being held up by a volunteer parent, and broke into a cheer herself. The boys gathered around her and began chanting, “Coach Maddie, Coach Maddie.”

She’d done it. She had tackled something she knew nothing about and made it a success. She didn’t try to hide the smile of pride on her face.