Claudia's Big Break (33 page)

I was in tears but didn't dare look around the room. Alex hurried over and wrapped his arms around Sophie and Levi. ‘Mummy's not going to die, darling. She's just very sad because she thinks we don't love her and need her. But she's wrong.' With his hand, Alex lifted Sophie's chin so that he could look at her. ‘I need you so much, Soph. Why do you think I'm here with you now?'

Levi was squirming between them, not knowing what was going on.

He kissed her forehead lightly. ‘Aren't you excited about this interior design course? I am.'

‘Really? It's a world away from corporate life.'

‘Who says you have to stick with the same career forever? The only reason I haven't suggested you go back to work or do a course is because I thought you were happy at home with Levi.'

‘I am but —'

‘— but you need more, I get it. I've always admired the fact that you can be with our little guy twenty-four hours, seven days a week.' He dropped his voice slightly. ‘It would drive me insane.'

Sophie said quietly, ‘I'm scared I'm heading in that direction.'

‘You're not. But we do need to check in with each other more. Maybe my hours have gotten a bit crazy over the past twelve months.'

‘Try two years.'

‘Okay, work's been out of control for a while. I'll look at that, but we also need some objective advice.'

‘A counsellor?'

‘For both of us. We could go back to the woman we were seeing after Levi was born.'

‘I liked her.'

‘I know you did. We only stopped going because I got so busy with work. But Sophie, I'm with you for the long haul, forever.'

‘I'm sorry —'

‘Please don't be sorry,' he said, pulling her into a bear hug.

‘I'm thinking about going on antidepressants again, too.'

Alex looked alarmed.

‘They helped me last time. I only stopped taking them because I didn't want to seem weak.'

‘You've never been weak, darling.'

‘Maybe, but sometimes it's like I'm in this black hole and I can't claw my way out, no matter how hard I try. I feel like you and I have nothing to talk about except Levi. Meanwhile, Claudia and Tara are living these amazing lives. I get so sad. I want to go to bed and never get up again.'

Clearly, she was talking about a different Claudia, one who wasn't a bitch and who had a great job, money, her own apartment, was slim, perky and owned an amazing designer wardrobe. Oh, and had bouncy, shiny hair like the women in the Pantene commercials.

‘Sophie —' Alex said.

‘I know it sounds irrational but that's how I feel.'

‘It's not irrational. We're going to get through this. I had no idea you felt this way. I thought it was about dirty laundry.'

Sophie managed a half-smile — at last. ‘Well, there is that as well.'

‘Babe, you know all the long hours I've been putting in at work are only for you and Levi. So that I can give you everything you want.' He kissed her lips. ‘The house is empty without you. I can't bear it.' Were those tears in Alex's eyes?

I looked around the room and suddenly realised I was the only onlooker. OMG! Talk about being the rudest, most inconsiderate person in the world.

Shielding my face from their view, I sprinted outside as quickly as my nimble legs would carry me. I cursed under my breath as I hurtled onto the patio.

‘Thanks for joining us,' Tara said.

‘Bloody hell. I thought you guys were inside as well.'

‘Us? God, no.'

Neither Tara, Angie nor I dared to go inside, and Sophie and Alex didn't venture outside. The only ones who didn't care where they wandered were Levi and Harry. Within minutes, Levi seemed to have recovered from the episode. He'd probably need therapy in later life, but for now he seemed fine. Personally, I found it all rather traumatic. Holidays were hard work.

When Sophie finally did come outside, she sat down and apologised. Tara and Angie quickly excused themselves again.

‘I don't know what you're apologising for,' I said. ‘I was the one who called you —'

Sophie put her hand up. ‘I called you a bitch. I win.'

I hugged her tight. ‘Water off a duck's back. I can be a bitch. Thanks for setting me straight.'

She looked like she might burst into tears again.

‘Soph, it's okay. Now tell me, do you really feel like you're trying to claw your way out of a dark hole?'

She sniffed. ‘Most days, yes.'

‘I had no idea.'

‘Why would you? I haven't seen you much in the past year.'

‘Sophie, I'm sorry I haven't been there for you.'

‘Hey, I haven't been around for you either. If I'd spent more time with you, I'd have sniffed out the situation with Marcus and it never would have come to this.'

‘On the flipside, we'd never have had this holiday.'

‘True.' Sophie took a breath. ‘You know, I think I'm probably jealous of you and I used Levi to push you away. Ever since he was born, I've wanted things done my way or not at all. I've resented Alex for so long, pushed him away, too. Even at my lowest, I refused his help, wanted to do it all on my own. He thought he was being a nuisance at home. He didn't seem to notice that I was drowning.'

‘I think we all —' I started to say as Alex walked out to join us.

‘I noticed,' said Alex. ‘I just didn't know what to do.'

‘But, Alex, you didn't notice my hair, my clothes. I once wore the same tracksuit for eight days and went for seven of them without washing my hair. You didn't say anything.'

‘So it was a test, Soph?' said Alex, visibly stunned. ‘And my pass or fail was based on whether or not I noticed your hair was clean?'

Sophie shook her head as the tears started falling again.

‘Harry is my best friend eber,' said Levi as he and Harry galloped past us on their way to the bathroom, neighing and pretending to be horses.

‘Levi's a great kid,' I said. ‘And you've seen how much fun he's had with Harry this holiday. Soph, if Alex or someone else does something differently than you when they're looking after Levi, it doesn't mean it's wrong, it's just different.'

Sophie nodded. ‘I know. I'm just used to controlling things. I have to learn to let go. Claud, I'm sorry that I said you couldn't love Levi. I know you do and I'm glad you're his godmother. Thank you.'

Just then, Tara and Angie walked outside, each holding an antipasto platter. It was time to sit back and admire the Santorini sunset one last time. Alex trotted back inside for wine and glasses and soon we were enjoying the peace and tranquility of the burnt orange sun as it dipped to the horizon. The scene felt strangely calm and serene. Or maybe all of us were just completely and utterly shattered.

29

W
ith all of the early evening's drama, I'd forgotten about Jack and had hoped he'd forgotten about me as well. But no such luck.

‘Hope I'm not interrupting,' came an annoying voice from behind a massive bunch of flowers. Of course, he was interrupting. This was a party. A party to which Jack Harper had not been invited.

‘Come in, Jack,' Tara invited. ‘Are those for me? How sweet.' Laughing, she relieved him of his gift without waiting for a reply. He also handed over a couple of bottles of champagne. Expensive. French. ‘Very nice. Thanks, Jack.' She skipped away with the champagne and flowers, but not before nudging me and saying, ‘Have you thought about what I said earlier?'

I made a face but said nothing.

‘Jack, this is my husband, Alex,' said Sophie agreeably. ‘Alex, Jack.'

What short memories Tara and Sophie had. This was the man who'd ruined my holiday. Detained me against my will and destroyed my good name.

The two men shook hands and exchanged pleasantries. I continued sitting silently, sipping my wine and staring towards the sunset. But I couldn't concentrate because there were too many sets of eyes drilling into my head.

‘Claudia, could I have a moment?' Jack asked.

I glanced over at him. ‘I guess so,' I replied in a bored voice. I stood up and put my wine down on the table.

‘Inside?' he pointed. Reluctantly, I followed.

Tara came skipping out just as we were walking inside. ‘Drink this,' she said to Jack, handing him a Corona.

‘Don't you know anyone else on this island you can torment?' I asked him after we'd taken a seat on the sofa in the living room.

‘No one I care to torment as much as you, Claudia. I am sorry, you know.'

‘You said that already.'

‘But I really am. I mean it.'

‘I know, Jack. So what do you want from me?'

‘I want you — I want us to get to know each other better and to —'

‘We're different people. It just won't work.'

‘Why?'

‘Because it never does,' I answered truthfully. There was no way I was going to pay attention to Tara's advice. I liked Jack and I couldn't deny the physical attraction between us, but I needed to be able to trust the man I was with and Jack had betrayed my trust. I just wasn't prepared to put myself in a vulnerable position again.

‘I can learn to love karaoke,' he joked.

‘Look, Jack, I think you should leave.'

‘No. I haven't had a fair chance at explaining myself. Besides, Tara's given me a beer. Why don't I stay for one drink, and if after that you still find me repulsive, I'll go.'

‘Promise?'

‘You have my word.'

Like that was worth anything. ‘Fair enough, but don't expect me to talk to you.'

‘Wouldn't dream of it, Claud.'

‘And don't call me Claud!'

‘I am truly sorry for letting things get out of hand with us and for thinking you were involved in Marcus's scam.'

I nodded and walked back outside.

‘Jack is staying for one drink,' I announced to the group. ‘And then he is leaving.'

We resumed our positions. Tara opened the champagne that Jack had brought and we watched the Santorini sky change colours over the sparkling Mediterranean.

‘So, Jack, I hear you're a bounty hunter,' Alex said as he poured Jack a glass of champagne after he'd drained his beer in less than four minutes.

‘I don't know if bounty hunter is quite right. Most of the time I'm an ordinary private investigator.'

‘It must be fascinating,' said Tara, engaging him in yet another conversation. ‘Travelling all over the world to exotic places.'

‘Honestly, Tara, this is a first,' Jack said, doing his best to charm the crowd. ‘Most of the time it's just your run-of-the-mill investigative work. Cheating spouses, insurance fraud and dodgy companies.'

‘Beats working in an office, I'll bet,' said Sophie.

‘Yeah, it's got that going for it. I love it actually. There's always something new going on, and some of the cases I've worked on have been fascinating, but Greece has been the best . . . and the worst.'

I refused to acknowledge him or say another word. When he caught my eye, he raised his glass and winked. I wrinkled my nose.

It was then that Tara and Angie walked out carrying the main course — moussaka, olive bread, salads and souvlakia. A further invitation for Jack to stay if ever there was one.

‘I should leave you guys to it,' Jack said, making a feeble attempt to rise out of the wicker chair he was sitting in.

‘No. Stay,' Tara insisted. ‘We've got more than enough food.'

‘I really should be going,' he said again.

That's right. Get up out of your chair, big boy. Say your goodbyes and get the hell out of my life.

‘You must stay for dinner, Jack,' Tara said. ‘Hey, Claud?'

‘If he has to go, he has to go,' I said.

Jack smiled. ‘I don't have to leave.'

‘I am sure you've got other people to see and places to go,' I said firmly.

‘Not really.'

‘It's settled then. Sit down and eat,' said Tara as she served him a huge helping of everything. ‘You were saying, Jack?'

‘What were we talking about again?' Jack asked, staring straight at me as I seethed into my champagne.

‘You were saying that Santorini has been the best place you've worked,' Sophie prompted as she tucked into her moussaka.

Despite my agitation at Jack being here, I was relieved and happy to see Sophie eating again.

‘Yeah,' said Jack. ‘I got to be part of a big international investigation. Met some great people, too.'

Oh please! Did he really think I was buying all this crap? I'd seen more shit this evening than I would at a cow manure convention.

‘I'll second that,' agreed Tara. She sat down next to Angie and the two of them immediately began canoodling on an oversized chair that wasn't built for snogging adults.

Alex looked up from his plate. ‘So, Tara, I hear you and Angie are in love. How did all this come about?'

‘It just happened,' said Tara dreamily.

I could almost hear Alex's mind ticking away. ‘Really?' He didn't sound so convinced.

‘Yes, Alex. Are you in love with Sophie?' Tara asked.

‘Of course. More and more every day.' He looked at Sophie and winked. ‘But it's not really the same, is it? I mean, neither of you have got a . . .'

‘Penis?' Angie obliged.

‘So we couldn't possibly be in love?
'
Tara said.

‘Help me out here, Jack,' Alex said.

‘Mate, you're on your own. My aunt had five kids in six years. She's a lesbian now.'

‘Alex,' began Tara, ‘I'm surprised at you. Women can fall in love just as easily with women as they can with men.'

‘Yeah, it's all about desire and attraction,' said Sophie, hugging him. ‘You can't fight chemistry.'

‘But you can give it a damn good nudge,' I said.