Cinders and Ashes (21 page)

“
Move again, darling, and I won’t be responsible for my
actions.”

Following their lovemaking, exhaustion from the past couple
of days had taken its toll on both of them and within moments they
had fallen asleep. The light outside had already faded, warning
Sebastian it was soon time to get ready for dinner.

Still,
he was reluctant to move and instead savoured the feel of her lush
femininity lying so temptingly beside him.

Reluctantly, he tried to withdraw his arms from around her.
In particular the hand that was nestled warmly between her breasts,
only for her to wriggle backwards. Her movement immediately closed
the distance between them.

“
Amelia, I believe we went to sleep, darling. It will soon be
time for dinner,” Sebastian mumbled with a yawn.

“
I’m sorry,” Amelia said, shuffling around until she lay
facing him. “I must have been more tired than I realised.” She slid
upwards until she was sitting against the pillows, the covers
tugged up to cover her breasts as she placed a hand on his arm to
stop him from leaving the bed.

Sebastian paused and turned to face her. He eyed the pensive
frown on her face, and warily resumed his place beside
her.

“
You asked me to trust you,” Amelia replied hesitantly. She
paused as she tried to gather her thoughts and decide on the best
way to tell him.

“
I am the Earl of Eastleigh’s daughter.”

Silence
descended for several moments as Sebastian stared at her. He could
sense her tension as she waited for his response.

“
Well, I wasn’t expecting that,” he muttered, thinking of
Isobel’s note in the carriage yesterday. He almost asked her if she
was sure. “I wasn’t aware the Earl of Eastleigh had a daughter,” he
replied, easing around to sit facing her.

Amelia
nodded slowly. “I am estranged from him. He-.” She took a deep
breath and spoke the last in a rush. “He sent me away when my
mother died, and wouldn’t communicate with me. I haven’t spoken to
him for several years.”

Sebastian looked at her in consideration as she sat beside
him. The covers gripped tightly in her small fists indicated how
disturbed she was at confiding in him. Whatever had happened
between her and her father, the hurt was clearly still raw and
painful.

“
I can vaguely recall something about Eastleigh making
enquiries about someone a couple of years back. But I don’t know
that much about him, or what it was about.” He scowled across the
room as he searched his memory. “None of us frequent London as much
as we used to, so I don’t know much of the latest gossip. Dominic
visits London more often than any of us, so is the one who is
likely to know more about him.”

“
My father doesn’t care about me, Sebastian. I am sure if he
was asking about somebody, it wasn’t me,” Amelia replied, wishing
Sebastian would say something, or show some emotion. All that
showed on his face was a slightly thoughtful frown. “He sent me to
live with my aunts in Bath. I was essentially cast out by
him.”

“
What did you do?” Sebastian watched, as tears brimmed in her
eyes as she stared blankly at the blankets. “I don’t want to cause
you any distress, my darling,” he murmured, brushing the errant
moisture from her eyelash before tenderly running a finger down her
pale cheek. “Promise me you will tell me more when you are ready.”
He smiled tenderly when she nodded.

“
Thank you,” Amelia whispered softly, pleased he had
understood. “It is quite a sordid story, and something I cannot
recount very easily. It opens a lot of painful
memories.”

All
traces of passion gone, Sebastian eased her into his arms, giving
her the comfort she needed without question.

Amelia
was touched when he respected her plea and kept quiet. She knew he
had numerous questions and was struggling with the news of her
identity. A comfortable silence settled around them for several
moments.

“
It was my mother’s death that caused the change in my father.
He became remote and angry. To the point he refused to speak with
me, and sent me to my aunts. I begged him repeatedly not to send me
away, but he ignored me and sent me anyway,” Amelia whispered
morosely.

It
explained so much to Sebastian about their recent conflict. Pieces
of the jigsaw began to slot into place, and he suddenly began to
see Amelia much more clearly. “That explains why you were so angry
with me for dragging you home with me, despite your
arguments.”

Amelia
smiled ruefully. “It seems my life is plagued by domineering men.”
Her smile widened at his abashed look. She wasn’t falling for it
for a second.

“
The difference is, my darling; this domineering man has your
best interests at heart,” Sebastian murmured, eyeing the gentle
curve of her lips.

“
I know. It is just, sometimes, you can be so-.” Amelia
searched for the right word that wouldn’t cause him offence.
“Lordly.”

She
whacked him on his shoulder when he began to laugh.

“
Lordly?” He grinned widely.

“
Yes. You expect everyone to do as you want, when you want,
without question. Even me,” Amelia grumbled. Her sparkling eyes met
his as she fought not to return his smile.

“
You deny me, my darling,” Sebastian murmured softly. “You
deny me the one thing I really want every second we are
apart.”

“
Sebastian,” she whispered, sensing the sensual tension rise
between them with a shiver of feminine anticipation.

“
If I command you, would you allow me to make love to you
again?” Sebastian already knew the answer to that
question.

“
No. Not if you command me to,” Amelia replied
pertly.

“
There you go.
You
deny me. If I asked you to let me make love to
you. As my equal, not my servant, mistress or whore, would you?”
Sebastian was hard as a rock again, as his body waited with
anticipation for her answer.

“
Yes,” Amelia whispered, watching the surprise enter his eyes
as he gazed at her. “As your equal I would deny you
nothing.”

Sebastian leant over her intently. “Are you sure?” Hope and
anticipation brightened his gaze as he stared down at her, his
erection already throbbing in readiness.

“
Yes, I’m sure. Make love to me, Sebastian,” Amelia murmured
tugging his head down to hers. At the last moment before their lips
met, Sebastian paused, his eyes holding hers steadily. “No regrets
afterwards?”

“
No regrets, Sebastian.” Amelia kissed his lips softly. “Make
love with me.”

Later
that evening, Amelia sat somewhat awkwardly at the dining table,
certain that everyone knew Sebastian had spent the day in her room.
Although they hadn’t said anything, she had been aware of the
knowing looks that had passed between Peter and Edward when she
took her seat at the table. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment,
certain that she had a sign around her neck proclaiming ‘harlot’.
She looked toward Sebastian who, seemingly oblivious, gave her a
wink of reassurance.

“
Tonight we need to look at that Penny Dreadful more carefully
and see if anyone can remember anything about the murder. I think
it has some significance or else why would it be hidden in a book?”
Sebastian announced to the assembled group, once the meal was
finished. “Let’s retire to the library and we will decide what we
need to do.”

With
everyone’s agreement, within moments they were ensconced in the
library. Tea was served to the ladies and brandy to the men, as
they opened the Penny Dreadful and placed it on a low table in the
middle of the room.

“
It looks so much like Lord Hawksworth,” Edward muttered,
staring at the haunting drawing on the top of the Penny Dreadful
with a shudder. “We need to visit the family and find out if it
really is him.”

“
We then need to find out how he came to be hung for murder.
Did he really kill the maid?” Amelia added. “How do we find
out?”

Sebastian frowned. “We need to discover if Hawksworth ever
went to this maid’s workplace. Carshalton Hall. Does anyone know
who owns it?” Everyone shook their heads negatively.

“
I think I know,” Amelia declared.

“
How?” Dominic replied with a frown. He quickly glanced at
Sebastian and wondered where this was going.

“
The face on the Penny Dreadful looks familiar, but not for
the reasons you think.” She hadn’t told Sebastian of her thoughts
yet, but continued regardless. Somehow, she knew he would
understand. “My father is the Earl of Eastleigh,” Amelia announced
into the silence.

“
Good God, it’s you!” Dominic declared, after several moments
of stunned silence.

“
Pardon?” Sebastian asked. He stared nonplussed at his elder
brother.

“
Eastleigh,” Dominic replied, studying Amelia closely. “He has
been looking for you.” His tone softened at the look of alarm on
Amelia’s face. He glanced warily at Sebastian who was staring at
him intently.

“
I think you had better tell us more, Dominic,” Sebastian
declared, taking a seat beside Amelia and squeezing her hand
reassuringly. Her beautiful face had gone deathly pale.

Dominic
saw for himself the worry she couldn’t hide. “I can remember about
two and a half years ago, I was at White’s. Eastleigh was just
leaving. He looked old and worn. Very unlike his usual debonair
self. He had apparently been asking questions about investigators
who looked for missing people. Rumour at the time was that he was
looking for his daughter. Nobody knew much as she hadn’t come out,
but word was that she had disappeared and he was trying everything
possible to find her.”

Amelia
fought the urge to run but knew that if she wanted these people to
accept her, she had to be honest with them. She knew at that moment
the folly of not confiding everything to Sebastian earlier, while
they had been in bed.

“
My mother was ill for some time.” Amelia clasped the
reassuring warmth of Sebastian’s palm gratefully, as she opened the
Pandora’s Box of painful memories.

“
She was alright one day, then the next, something happened. I
am not sure what. She refused to get out of bed, saying she had a
headache and needed peace and quiet. It was a couple of months
before I was due to move to London for my coming out.
Unfortunately, as the weeks progressed she refused to get up and
seemed to withdraw from life. She never seemed to
recover.”

Amelia
frowned as the memories bubbled like molten lava to the surface.
She couldn’t suppress them. Despite the reassuring warmth of
Sebastian sitting beside her, she shivered as memories rose to
batter her senses.

“
I got quite cross with her because she appeared quite well
but refused to leave her room. Her behaviour didn’t make sense. She
was eating healthily. At times she was up and moving around her
room quite nimbly. At nights I could hear her arguing with my
father, but not loud enough to hear the details. By morning she was
too ill to leave her bed. One day, my father announced that my
coming out was cancelled, and I was instead to go to live with my
aunts in Bath.” Amelia’s voice quavered as she remembered those
days of confusion and uncertainty.

“
I argued, and tried to get him to reconsider but he refused
repeatedly, insisting that I was to leave immediately. I tried to
plead with my mother, but she became argumentative and insisted I
go. Neither of them wanted me in the house anymore, and declared it
would be better if I was introduced to the social circuit in Bath,
rather than London. Despite everything, I argued with my mother.
Begged and pleaded, but got nowhere.” Amelia took a deep breath as
she remembered that last encounter.

“
You don’t have to carry on, Amelia; it’s alright if you want
to take a break,” Sebastian murmured, ignoring everyone seated
around the room and drawing her closer to him. He slid his arm
around her back in mute support.

“
It’s alright,” she murmured, offering him a wobbly smile. Now
she had begun to speak about the past, the words tumbled out in a
flow she couldn’t stop.

“
The day before I was due to leave, I decided to plead with my
mother in a last ditch attempt to get her to listen to me. I hated
my aunts. They are greedy, always dropping hints about needing
money, and trading vicious gossip about people. My mother argued
that I was to go. This time though, the argument became more
heated. Suddenly she grasped her chest and fell to the floor. I
screamed and shouted for help. I can’t remember much about what
happened, other than I was shoved out of the room.”

The
haunting vision of her mother’s lifeless body lying on the bedroom
floor rose unbidden in her mind’s eye. It was so vivid, it could
have happened just yesterday.

“
I waited and waited for news of her condition, although
inside I think I knew she was gone. When my father did request my
presence in the library, he informed me that nobody was able to do
anything for her. I could remain at Eastleigh House until the
funeral, but as soon as she was buried I was to depart to my aunts’
house in Bath. I was to remain there until he sent further
direction.” Amelia swiped at the tears on her face, as she thought
about that horrifying moment when her future was decided for
her.