Chasing Shadows (23 page)

"Simon," I choked out as I sat up. "I'm okay."

Simon's face flooded with relief at my words as he touched my face repeatedly, as if to reassure himself that I actually was okay. I looked beyond him and saw Neal sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed with his legs stretched out in front of him with blood on his shirt. I felt relief course through me when I realized the blood was gushing from his nose and not his wrists, which were unharmed. He had a stunned expression on his face as he looked at me.

"Neal," I croaked. "Are you okay?"

"Fuck Neal." Simon's voice had a dangerous tone which made me tense.

"Simon," I whispered, not wanting Neal to hear me. "Remember,
he
didn't do anything. His vardoger did. If anything, he's the victim in all of this."

Simon's lips pressed together and he looked like he wanted to argue but thought better of it, his eyes concerned as his gaze traveled over me. "Are you sure you're okay?"

I grasped Simon's arm and tried to stand up, using his weight as support. Simon immediately grabbed my arms and eased me up gently.

"I'm fine." I looked at Neal who still looked shell-shocked. "Neal," I called out, louder this time.

Neal blinked and then seemed to come to his senses, frantically looking around as if he expected a boogeyman to jump out.

"C-Caitlin, what the hell happened? The last thing I remember was finding my textbooks. The next thing I know, Simon is punching me and you're lying on the floor." Horror filled his face as he stared at me. "Did I...did I do something to you?"

Neal struggled to stand up, only succeeding in pushing himself up enough to sit on his bed. I walked closer to Neal, despite the resistance I felt in Simon's arm around me.

"No, you didn't do anything," I said gently. I didn't want Neal to be traumatized by something he couldn't even remember. "I lost my balance and fell. I grabbed onto you to stop myself from falling, but instead I made you fall too. That's probably why you don't remember. You hit your head on the floor pretty hard. You got up to see if I was okay and Simon got the wrong idea when he saw you standing over me." I turned to Simon. "Right, Simon?" I gave him a meaningful look.

Simon grimaced but he nodded his head. "Yeah, sorry about that."

I grabbed a towel draped over the headboard and handed it to Neal. "Your nose is bleeding a lot. I just hope it's not broken."

Neal took the towel from me and pressed it against his face. "No, it's fine." He still looked like he was in a daze. He tentatively pressed his hand against the back of his head, looking even more confused when it didn't seem to hurt.

I looked around the room, unsure as to what to do next now that I had destroyed his vardoger. I couldn't see the razor anywhere, which was strange. Even the black box was gone. I opened the desk drawer, not caring what Neal would think about the invasion of his privacy, but it was empty. Simon grabbed my arm.

"Let's go."

"Simon, we can't just leave him here after you gave him a bloody nose!"

"No...it's okay." Neal rubbed his eyes, wincing when he accidentally brushed against his nose. "I think I just need to lie down for a while. I'm...I'm feeling a little disoriented."

"Okay," I said with a frown. "Call me if you need anything."

Simon frowned at my words but I just shrugged the look off.

Neal nodded as he lay down on the bed, still holding the towel against his nose.

"Well, I guess I'll see you later." I felt uncertain whether to try and maintain a friendship with Neal, but there really was no reason to, now that his vardoger was gone. He was a nice guy but I didn't have much room in my life right now for new friends.

Simon propelled me towards the door and I saw that the lock had been smashed. I raised my eyebrows at Simon, not knowing how he had the strength to force the door open, but he just shrugged.

"Don't bother showing up for basketball today," Simon said over his shoulder as we were leaving. "And delete Caitlin's number from your phone."

"Simon!" I was furious at his parting words and tried to turn to tell Neal to ignore him, but Simon was too strong for me, pushing me towards the elevator.

"It's not his fault," I hissed as Simon pushed the button for the elevator. The doors opened immediately and we stepped inside.

"I don't care. You have no reason to see him again."

I wanted to explode but there was a fellow student in the elevator and I could tell by his expression that he was fascinated by our conversation. I bit my tongue until we exited the elevator and stepped outside.

"Simon, you can't act like this! This is my life and I have to spend it protecting people. I can't have you getting all jealous and protective every time!"

Simon didn't answer. Instead he pulled me into an embrace, holding me so tight that it was hard to take a full breath. I felt his body shudder and his heart beating so rapidly that I could feel it against my chest.

"Simon?" I said uncertainly, my anger melting away. "What's wrong?"

"I thought I lost you." Simon's voice was low and tortured. "I snuck into the building but then I couldn't figure out which floor you were on. I went to every damn floor to try and find you but every asshole I asked didn't know which room was Neal's until I finally got to his floor. I knew something was wrong. I could
feel
it. Then when I saw you lying on the floor...I thought you were dead."

Simon's body jerked and I wrapped my arms around him, my anger just a distant memory. I rubbed my hand up and down his back, trying to soothe him. "But I'm okay, Simon. I'm okay."

Simon didn't answer as he continued to hold me. After a while, he finally pulled back so he could look me in the face. "Don't ask me to apologize for what I did. For how I'm reacting. I've never been so scared to lose someone."

I sighed, caressing his jaw with my hand. "It'll get easier as time goes on. You'll see." Simon looked like he was going to argue so I gently pressed my finger against his mouth. "I'm not saying it was the best idea to go to Neal's dorm room. I was just convinced that nothing would happen during daylight since it was night in my vision. But I have to do this, Simon. This is what I'm meant to do. Please don't make it harder than it already is. I need your support."

Simon's face tensed but he just nodded. He lowered his mouth and I leaned up towards him. He stroked the back my head as he pulled me closer, but he frowned when I flinched.

"I hit my head on the dresser. It's just a little sore," I explained quickly.

Simon's frown deepened as he turned me around, examining my head with gentle hands. "You have a pretty nasty bump here. We should go to the health center."

"I'm fine, Simon. I'll probably just have a headache for the rest of today."

"Caitlin, you've barely recovered from a concussion and now you've hit your head again. You need to get it checked out." Simon lifted an eyebrow as if he were daring me to disagree.

I sighed but nodded my head, knowing that he was right. Fortunately, the wait wasn't very long to see the nurse and she just told me to take some pain killers and to come back if it didn't get any better or if I had any nausea or difficulty in my thought processes or motor skills.

Sarah jumped up and hugged me when we got back to Simon's apartment, unable to hold back her tears. Kendra looked confused by her extreme reaction, but Sarah just said it was almost the time of the month for her and it always made her a little crazy. Fortunately, Kendra accepted the excuse and proceeded to regale Sarah with different solutions for PMS. Simon rolled his eyes and led me away to his bedroom as Kendra chattered on.

"What are we doing in here?" I asked. Simon guided me to the bed and he laid down, pulling on my arm to urge me to join him.

"Simon! Sarah and your sister are right outside the door! This isn't the time for a make-out session!"

My words belied my actions as I allowed Simon to pull me down. He gathered me in his arms, spooning me and holding me so close that it was hard to tell where I started and he ended.

"Just let me hold you for a little bit," he whispered. "I still have to convince myself that you're okay. That I haven't lost you."

I melted into him, feeling warm and safe and at home.

Chapter Twenty-Three

The rest of the day was uneventful. The boys never did end up playing basketball. Instead, Simon invited everyone to his place where we ordered Chinese takeout. Simon kept touching me the entire night, as if he needed to reassure himself that I was really okay. Everyone turned in early since we were all leaving for Thanksgiving the next morning.

The drive down to Connecticut on Wednesday morning was longer than expected, due to the heavy traffic. Even Kendra ran out of things to talk about and eventually fell asleep. I was too wired by the past day's events, even though I felt fatigue weighing me down.

"How much longer?" I asked, leaning my head back against the seat.

"We should get there in about an hour." Simon glanced at me and tightened his grip on my hand. "Tired?"

"A little. I shouldn't be complaining since you're the one driving."

"Anything else bothering you?"

I glanced behind me to make sure Kendra was asleep in the backseat. "Not really. It's just the closer I get to Connecticut, the harder it is to deal with the fact that my aunt is still missing."

"The police haven't come up with any leads?"

I sighed, thinking of my last conversation with the detective from my aunt's precinct. It was as if Aunt Brenda and her friends had disappeared into thin air and I didn't understand why more wasn't being done about it. The police seemed to believe that they disappeared of their own accord, but even their friends and families didn't seem to be overly concerned.

"No. No one seems to care. It's like everyone thinks they just simply walked away."

"I'm sorry, Caitlin. I know how hard it was to lose your aunt right after you found her."

I squeezed Simon's hand in gratitude for his sympathy. "I have to believe she's still out there somewhere, waiting for me to figure out what the hell is going on and save her." I felt an ache in my chest. "I can't tell you how satisfying it felt to save Neal yesterday. To destroy his vardoger. It was amazing. Empowering. But those feelings disappear when I think about the fact that I can help strangers, but I can't help my own aunt."

"We'll find out what happened to her, I promise." My heart dropped at Simon's words. Instead of saying that we'd find her, he had promised that we would find out what happened to her. It sounded like he assumed my aunt was dead.

I pushed the morbid thought aside. "Can we visit my aunt's house today?"

Simon glanced at me quickly before turning his gaze back to the road. "Of course."

The last hour of our drive went by quickly and soon we were pulling into Simon's circular driveway. Maxine greeted us with a warm hug and smile, ushering us inside.

"Your father is at work, of course, and your mother is visiting some friends but she should be home soon. You kids must be starving."

Kendra nodded eagerly although she was still groggy from her nap in the car. "I could eat a horse!"

Maxine laughed. "I prepared a late lunch for you. Go ahead and sit down in the dining room and I'll bring it out."

I was antsy, wanting to go to my aunt's house before it got dark, but I didn't want to be rude so I followed Kendra into the dining room. Simon trailed behind me after he dropped our bags in the foyer. Simon always seemed to know what I was thinking because he pulled me back before we reached the dining room.

"We can go to your aunt's house after lunch."

"Thanks." I paused, thinking of the long drive we had just finished. "You must be exhausted from the drive. I can go on my own so you can rest if you let me borrow your car."

Simon raised an eyebrow. "Why do I always feel like you're trying to ditch me?"

I laughed at Simon's affronted expression. "I swear I'm not trying to ditch you. I just feel bad."

Simon gave me a quick kiss before leading me into the dining room. "Don't feel bad. I want to go with you."

Lunch was chicken salad sandwiches with homemade potato chips, along with a big plate of blueberry crumble bread. I found I was much hungrier than I thought and ate with gusto. Mrs. Crewe came home in the middle of lunch, her eyes lighting up as she caught sight of us. Kendra jumped up from her seat to give her mother a hug.

"Hey, Mom!" she exclaimed. "We just got back. You won't believe the great time I had at Maxwell. I got to go to a bar and listen to the Henchmen!"

Mrs. Crewe gave Simon a look of censure as he gave her a more sedate hug. "What's this about you taking your underage sister to a bar?"

"You know there's nothing more annoying than Kendra when she wants something," Simon said wryly. "Don't worry, she just came to hear the band. She didn't have a drop of alcohol."

Mrs. Crewe just shook her head but seemed to accept Simon's explanation. Her smile widened when she saw me, and she gave me a hug which I returned awkwardly.

"Caitlin, I'm so happy you could come for Thanksgiving!"

"Thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it."

"Of course." Mrs. Crewe's smiled faded as her expression turned serious. "How are you doing with everything? It must still be a shock with what happened with Claudia."

If only she knew what had really happened. She would probably lock her son and daughter in their rooms and never let them out.

"I'm doing okay, thanks. I appreciate your concern." I tried to sound believable. "It's a day-by-day process, but it's slowly becoming like a nightmare that's fading."

"I'm happy to hear that." She glanced at our plates as we settled back down to finish our lunch. "What are you kids up to after you eat?"

"I told Megan I'd come over," Kendra chirped, shoving her last chip in her mouth and picking up her plate. She disappeared into the kitchen as Mrs. Crewe's attention turned to me and Simon.

"What about you two?"