Chasing Paradise (Chasing Series #3) (14 page)

Her kindness touched me. I wasn’t sure if it was because m friends were all so busy with their lives, or that no one was paying attention to what I was going through, but Adriana noticed. “Thank you for your honesty, Adriana. And yes, I will think about what you said. I will speak to you tomorrow. Please, don’t forget that spa appointment I told you. Go hit the shops while you’re at it.” I offered, before saying my goodbyes a few minutes later.

Was I that miserable with Sienna? Apart from amazing sex, our love was still there, but it was tense—the peace I used to get from being with her was no more. It could be because she was grieving the loss of another man. Or maybe because when she tells me that she loved me, it didn’t sound the same.

I was so consumed with my thoughts that I didn’t hear her until she stood before me.

“
Blake? I’ve been calling for you, but you weren’t responding.” She asked, glancing at the phone then back at me. “
Who
were you talking to?”

“
Adriana, my assistant.”

She nodded, pressing her lips together before she gave me a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “Come to bed, we can make love a couple times before going to sleep.” She offered her hand.

Make love…I remembered not a few hours ago, after I emptied myself inside her, I had never felt more hollowed in my life. Like the void was seizing me whole—no, making love to her wasn’t the answer. Taking hold of her outstretched hand, I pressed my lips against it before looking up to her. “Go on, poppet. Get some sleep. I will need sometime to sort some things. I will be there with you shortly.”

If she was shocked or offended when I declined her offer, she didn’t show it. I didn’t go into our bedroom until dawn. Staring at her for another half an hour as thoughts ran through my head, before sleep finally caught on me.

Sixteen

Blake

I woke up after nine in the morning, by then Sienna was long gone. Grumpily, I headed to shower, trying my damnedest not to think that she was with him.

It was Saturday and I normally don’t go into work, but I needed to distract myself because I would go mental if I stayed at home, dwindled my fingers and waited for her to come home—depressed and aggrieved.

Dressed and ready, I dashed towards the lift and towards the lobby. Coming out of the cart, my heart jumped in my throat because past the marbled entrance, just right outside the entrance doors, Kyle and Sienna were wrapped in each other’s arms—while Gareth was a short distance away, while the hired security team was onto them, while the concierge folks were staring curiously at the saddened couple.

If I thought that was wretched, I should think again because that was when the love of my life pulled back and kissed him on the cheek, before his lips and lingered there. If she was about to open her mouth and shoved her tongue into his, I wouldn’t have known because I couldn’t take it. I marched towards the exit staircase that led to the other side of the building, before hailing a cab, got into it and wished my life away.

I spent my weekend in stupor with my phone off. I managed to check into a hotel suite before I drowned myself into oblivion. I didn’t want to talk to anyone else. Being along was all I needed.

Monday, I finally was out of my haze and decided to go home. Mind you, a hysterical woman greeted me. Quite brilliant, really.

“
Where in God’s name have you been? I’ve searched high and low for you!” Sienna screeched at me, eyes cracking with fire.

Halting my steps, I gave her a cutting glance. “Busy. Why, did you need me for something?”

“
Yes—I needed to know if you were okay! Damn you, Blake!” She was about to keep going but Gareth brought in a box.

A delivery for Sienna
. I’m sure it was from Matthews, I thought with pure disdain and loathing, before I grabbed it out of Gareth’s hands and opened it myself.

What contained it was really quite out of the ordinary. Was this a sick joke? It was a certificate of a purchased funeral lot with her name on it. “
What in the bloody fucking God’s name is going the fuck on?
” I eyed Sienna before I slashed Gareth another glance.

“
What the hell are these, Sienna?” I asked her, needing answers this instant.

Gareth shook his head, pondering hell. “I have no clue, Mr. Knightly.”

Sienna then snatched them, studied it closely, turning pale as she scanned the pages. With doubtful eyes, she spoke. “It’s from them.” She stated as a matter of factly, as if it has happened before.

My blood turned cold. “
This is not the first time, is it?
” I bellowed, losing all of my composure, my temper reared with blasted hell.

“
No.” she breathed. “This is the second.”

Merda!
“And you kept it from me?
How could you?
” I thundered out, feeling bothered and betrayed that she would keep something this significant to the investigation, but more importantly she didn’t deem me worthy to know.

“
I wanted to just ignore it. I didn’t want to deal with it. These could be just idle threats to make me leave you. Who the fuck knows?” She countered, standing her ground.

Was Sienna this dense really?
“Someone. Tried. To. Kill. You! That doesn’t sound like an idle threat to me!” I screeched. “How difficult is that to grasp woman? But you don’t care do you? Yeah, go on as you are, I’m sure they’d be hounding your heels much more because you do not give a flying arse if you die today!”

“
I truly don’t.”

“
Well, good for you.
Truly
. Maybe I should learn to be just a fucking cold-hearted bitch and not care about anyone else other than myself!” I fumed, glancing at her infuriated face, before I glanced at Gareth. “From now on, Sienna’s in charge with you. If she decides to fire you this instant, that’s up to her. She knows what she’s doing apparently, so I’ll hand it all over to her. Good day.” I strode towards the lift, wanting to leave this forsaken place.

Sienna was charging towards me, spitfire. “Where are you going? I’m not with you yet!”

Yeah, everything had to be about what she wanted for fuck’s sake! “Too bad, cara. I don’t want to be here, let alone face you.”

“
Blake!” Sienna pleaded, before I shook my head and left her.

If she wanted to be in-charge about her future then so be it. What was the use to trying to protect her if she didn’t want it? What was the point of trying to push myself with her if she wasn’t interested?

I was grasping on straws.

I was fighting a battle that wasn’t truly there because Sienna made it difficult for me to see—she was confusing the hell out of me. She was grieving Kyle, but was in love with me. How did that even make sense? If I had loved another woman, would she be this patient? Would she have done the same things I’d done for her?

Somehow I doubted it.

But whatever was going on anymore, I wasn’t going to be a beggar and keep the scraps she keeps throwing at me once in awhile.

I was one desperate, besotted fool, but even fools in love have limits too. I think I might’ve reached mine.

Seventeen

Sienna

“
Hello?” I answered Lucy’s call.

“
Hey, love. I’m flying with Chad and Luke. Will you be joining us or you’re flying private with Blake? I heard he wouldn’t be flying out until later this afternoon.”

Hell, she was going? What? “Lucy, are you sure this is even wise for you to be there? I mean…you know, this is not going to be easy, babe.”

She sighed, melancholy. “I think I have to see it with my very eyes. Then I wouldn’t be thinking if that ever happened or if it was all my imagination kind of thing.”

Lucy was an enigma to me sometimes. The things she did, I wouldn’t have the guts to do. “Are you sure? That sounds a little crazy to me.”

“
It is. Anyhow, are you about to join us?” Lucy directed me the question I didn’t have an answer to.

I didn’t even know if Blake wanted to see me, especially after what happened earlier this morning. Was he washing himself off me? I didn’t know. Toby’s wedding was going to happen tomorrow afternoon and we all needed to be there tonight for festivities.

Clearing my throat, I tried to sound calm and under control. “You guys go ahead, I will go with Blake. I’m sure he’d appreciate that.” Well, I hoped he did anyway.

“
Alright then, I will see you lovelies tonight.” Lucy said her goodbyes then, before hanging up on me.

After a quick call to Luke to get Blake’s schedule for the rest of the afternoon, I darted towards the bedroom and packed hastily before I had Robert, the chauffer, drive me to Blake’s office.

I knew he’d be in a meeting when I arrived, so I took my time and looked around his office, stopping by his desk, as my forefinger traced the outline as I walked around it. Memories of how he took me on this table sent stirrings into my womanhood. That was the last time he took me. Blake had an insatiable appetite, but it seemed he wasn’t interested in touching me. Now that I think about it, he never even hinted into wanting to have sex with me since that time he took me on this desk.

My mind wandered to that night, until I heard voices and some laughter, before his door opened and in strode Blake with Adriana hanging off his arm.

Alarm bells were ringing full on as the waves of jealousy rocked me hardcore. I was frozen on the spot, my heart slowly breaking at the sight of him enjoying another woman’s company, seeming at ease with her, and not to mention the fact that she had her arm on his—not bothering to care—or that me might have enjoyed it, which ever it was, I didn’t like it.

“
Sienna?” Blake frowned at me. “What brought you here? Did you need something?”

Yeah, I needed my fiancé back. Where was he?

“
I was hoping if we could fly together to Spain.” I nervously eyed him, before my gaze flickered at the Latina next to him. Beautiful and tall like a supermodel with curves. “And who might this woman be? Is this your mistress?”

Blake turned into stone, eyes hard as rocks. “Don’t be rude, Sienna.” He glanced at Adriana, before guiding her towards me. “This is Adriana. She’ll be taking Luke’s place once he gets stationed in New York headquarters soon.”

My brow rose at Blake, then at the woman. “Your assistant? Well you two looked far to cozy for a working relationship.” My words barbed into my heart, loathing both of them on sight, before I wanted to throw more crap into them, but Blake interrupted me.

“
Adriana, that would be all for today. Why don’t you go ahead and prepare yourself for the flight. I will call for you once we’re ready to leave.” He nodded at her and we both waited until Adriana was out the door.

The second that door shut itself; I was ready to launch myself at him. “You lying sack of shit! You’re cheating on me!”

“
You can’t treat people I employ like that, Sienna! How the hell do you come off accusing when you barely know the person?” Blake spat on my face, angered. “Adriana deserves to be respected and she’s been a great friend. I’m not cheating on you.”