Chasing a Dream (32 page)

“Yes. Charmingly stubborn. Don’t ever change, Justin. It’s one of the reasons I fell in love with you.”

The grin on his lips slipped, and his eyes flashed with emotion. “Say that again.”

“Which part?”

“You used the ‘L’ word.”

She glanced down at her hands and furrowed her brow. “I did, didn’t I?”

“Yeah.”

She did love him. So why was it so hard to say the words? He’d pledged his love to her, sworn to stand by her, proven his trustworthiness. What was wrong with her?

“Justin, I—”

“It’s all right. I understand.”

But the pain in his eyes and the disappointment in his voice said he didn’t understand. And she’d hurt him. Regret sliced through her. Dropping her gaze to the notebook, she read what Justin had scribbled on the page.

I tried and tried to play the chords she taught me

I was just a kid learning the hard way

More than anything, I wanted to make her happy

For my sister, I’d practice night and day

Sayin’— Next time I’ll do better

Experience is a teacher

A second chance is all I need

If you’ll believe in me

I won’t let you down

Oh, I promise I’ll do better

Next time.

A dull ache lodged in her heart. “You wrote this about Rebecca.”

He angled his head and released a slow, deep breath. “Yeah. Right after she died.”

Tess read aloud. “ ‘Well, we grew up, and big sister got married. She was just a wife learning the hard way. More than anything, she wanted him to be happy. For her husband, she’d give both night and day. Saying, “Next time I’ll do better. Experience is a teacher. A second chance is all I need” . . .’ ”

She stopped when her voice broke, then with a deep breath, she went on to the third verse. “ ‘The first time he got angry, she forgave him. But in the end she learned the hard way. How I wish I’d done more to convince her. Not to give the man who’d hurt her one more day. But she believed him when he’d say, “Next time I’ll do better. Experience is a teacher. A second chance is all that I need. If you’ll believe in me, I won’t let you down. Oh, I promise I’ll do better. Next time.” Now when the cold night wind blows. I only hope Rebecca knows. What I’d give if she could have had a next time.’ ”

Tess sat silently, absorbing the love and grief that had prompted Justin to write the song. Finally she whispered, “You know, you gave me a next time. You gave me a reason to want a second chance. You’ve given me what Rebecca was denied. In a way, I feel like Rebecca gave it to me too.”

Justin turned his gaze up to find hers. His expression reflected a degree of surprise, a touch of sadness. “That’s what I prayed for the night she died. A second chance to do better. The opportunity to make up to Rebecca for not being there for her. God sent you to me. I know he did. You’ve helped heal me.” His gaze bore into her. “Do you know why I fell in love with you?”

Her heartbeat tripped. “Why?”

“Besides the fact that you’re the best-looking woman I ever met, and you have a smile that could stop traffic . . .” He paused, and the smile he sent her felt like a soft caress. “I loved your heart.”

His voice and gentle expression held her mesmerized.

“Despite all the reasons you had to not trust the world, despite all the pain you’d suffered, despite the right you had to harden your heart and be bitter, you didn’t. The woman who offered me a ride that rainy day was trusting and kind and generous and sweet and witty and—”

She held up a hand to stop him. “I think I was naive and foolish and sympathetic and frightened, and you just saw all my flaws in a positive light, being the optimist that you are. I had selfish motives for picking you up.” She ducked her head and bit her lip.

“And you don’t give yourself enough credit.” Justin pushed himself out of the armchair and knelt in front of her. “Don’t underestimate yourself, Tess. Randall has dimmed your vision of your worth, but I can see all you have to give, all the virtue in you. You’re a warm, intelligent, wonderful woman, and don’t you forget that.” He pressed his hands to her cheeks and lifted her face.

She couldn’t hide from the intensity in his eyes, and her heart turned over. Her troubled conscience split wide and poured at his feet. “For so long, I turned my back on what I knew was wrong. I gave up my self-respect. I sold what was good about me to survive. How do I ever forgive myself for that?”

“One day at a time, baby. You did what you had to, what you felt was best at the time. But you didn’t lose everything good to him, or you wouldn’t be here now. You have courage and strength and a sense of justice that led you to act when the time was right.” He stroked her cheek. “Remind yourself of that when you want to doubt what you have inside.”

She gave him a weak smile, and his mouth descended to hers. His kiss filled her with warmth and hope and promise. When the tip of his tongue traced her lips, the warmth heated, and the most basic of longings burgeoned from inside.

Easing back onto the bed, she took Justin with her, and his body blanketed hers while their hunger for each other grew. As always, Justin’s patience and attention to her fulfillment awed her and touched her heart. His hands stroked gently, slowly, and his kiss explored intimately, thoroughly, until Tess quivered with desire to be one with him.

And as before, when Justin joined their bodies, she experienced the union to her core, in her spirit. Each time Justin made love to her, she lost a little more of her heart and soul to him, just as he gave his own heart and soul to her.

He became an extension of her, an amazing phenomenon Tess wanted to spend the rest of her life exploring. He stirred to life the hope that she could find all the good in her once more and cling to those qualities when doubt reared its head.

In Justin she’d found her safe harbor, her home. But more importantly, he’d helped her find herself.

She realized then the reason she withheld the words of love he needed to hear. The gift of love he gave her was whole, unblemished, complete. She wanted to offer the same to him. But Randall still haunted her. Before she could offer her love to Justin, she had to truly free herself from Randall and his hold on her soul.

***

Brian waited patiently while the man at the five-and-dime studied the picture of Tess.

“Pretty woman,” the man said. “Why is it you’re looking for her?”

“Long story,” Brian replied with a sigh. “Have you seen her or the other guy around here in the past couple of days?”

The store clerk handed the pictures back to Brian. “Afraid not. I’d remember a woman who looked like that.”

Brian huffed in frustration. If he’d shown the picture to one person, he’d shown it to 500, and he sensed that his time was running out. “Okay, thanks anyway.”

When he climbed back into his car, he crossed the address off the list of stores and restaurants that sold the postcard of the National Monument.

The secretary at the small printing company that distributed the postcards had helped Brian construct the list he worked from, but after a full day of showing Justin’s and Tess’s pictures around town, Brian’s patience had worn thin.

The last three names on his list included a diner near the interstate, and since he’d skipped lunch, he decided he’d visit the diner next.

Once there, he noticed the rack of postcards at the cash register before he slid into one of the booths.

A waitress with her hair pulled back in a ponytail handed him a menu.

“Hey, I like the haircut,” she said and smiled. “But it does sort of make you look older. Don’t you think?”

Brain looked at the waitress. “How old do I look?”

“About thirty-five, maybe thirty-six. I like it better long, but then that’s not for me to decide, huh? What does your girlfriend think? She
is
your girlfriend, right?”

“Who?”

The waitress tapped her pencil against her order pad. “Who do you think?”

“I really don’t know.” He watched her face as she narrowed her gaze and wrinkled her nose.

“Hey, whatever. Forget I asked. You want the regular? Chocolate chip pancakes with extra syrup?”

“God, no! Why would you say that?” His stomach turned over at the thought of so much sugar. He only knew one person who liked sweets enough to eat a meal like that.

His breath stilled in his lungs.

“Aren’t you—Oh, I’m sorry.” She blushed and waved her hand in dismissal. “I thought you were someone else. God, you look just like him. It’s spooky.”

Brian’s pulse quickened, and he fished out the picture of Justin. “You thought I was him, didn’t you?”

CHAPTER
TWENTY
-
FIVE

The waitress set down her order pad and took the picture. “Yeah. That’s the guy. He’s been in here a couple times over the last few days. Him and his girlfriend.”

Brian pulled out the picture of Tess. “Is this her?”

“Yeah, that’s the one. Real pretty hair. You know them?”

“I’m his brother.”

The waitress laughed. “I should have guessed. You could be twins. Except that you look older and stuffier.”

“Do you know where I can find them?”

“I think they’re staying at that motel.” She aimed her pen across the two-lane road.

Snatching the pictures back, energized by his good fortune, Brian rushed toward the door.

“Aren’t you gonna eat?” the waitress called after him.

“Not right now.” Brian moved his car across the street and hurried into the front office of the motel. He waved the pictures at the man behind the desk. “I’m looking for these two people. Are they staying here? What room are they in?”

The desk clerk put on a pair of reading glasses and took a look at the pictures. “That’s Mary and David Camper. They’re staying here, but I can’t tell you which room. That’d be an invasion of their privacy.”

“This is an emergency, damn it!” Brian slammed his hand down on the front desk. “Either you tell me where they are, or I’ll disturb every one of your customers by knocking on all the doors until I find them!”

“Try it, and I’ll call the police.” The man took off his glasses and matched Brian’s impatient glare with one of his own.

Brian sucked in a breath to steady his rising temper. “I’m his brother, and it’s imperative that I talk to him right away!”

The man behind the desk twisted his mouth and crossed his arms over his chest.

“In ten seconds I’m going to start knocking on doors, and then none of your guests will have any privacy.” Brian leveled a no-nonsense stare at the clerk.

The clerk scowled. “Room twenty-one.”

“Thank you.” As Brian jogged out to the sidewalk, he spotted a familiar-looking sedan, an old green Thunderbird. The car stopped in front of the motel, and he watched the thug who’d terrorized Hallie emerge from the vehicle.

Ducking behind a tall bush, Brian waited until the thug disappeared inside the motel office. Then he ran down the sidewalk, searching for room twenty-one.

Let them be there. Please, God, let them be there,
he prayed.

***

“Hello, can I help you?”

The brusque manner of the man behind the motel desk irked Morelli. He set his jaw but let the rudeness slide . . . this time.

He took out the pictures of Tess Sinclair and the Boyd man and slapped them on the counter. “Have you seen these two hanging around here?”

His lack of success frustrated him. He’d had no luck all day, not so much as a nibble.

The balding man behind the desk frowned. “Are these two in some kind of trouble? You’re the second person in five minutes to ask for them.”

“So you know where they are?”

“Are you a cop? You know, I could get in real trouble for giving out this kind of information.”

“You could say it was official business, yeah. Where are they?”

“Come on. I’ll show you.” The clerk stepped out from behind the desk, but as he did, the telephone rang. “Just a minute.”

Morelli gritted his teeth and suppressed the urge to choke the life out of the clerk.

“Okay, this way.” The clerk hung up the phone and started for the door. “What’d they do? Why are the authorities looking for them?”

Morelli curled his lip in a snarl. “They got a woman killed. And now they have to pay.”

***

“Brian?” Justin’s jaw dropped open in shock. “What the hell are you—”

Brian put a hand on his brother’s chest, pushed him backward into the room, then slammed the door closed. Tess gasped and scrambled off the bed.

“You two have to get out of here now.” In a flurry of motion, Brian gathered things into a backpack. “One of Sinclair’s hit men is in the motel office as we speak. He broke in our house the other night and held a gun on Hallie.”

Justin’s gut twisted.

“I had to tell him about the postcard you sent, or he’d have killed Hallie. But I beat him up here, and now we have to get out of here before he finds you.”

“Postcard?” Tess cast Justin an accusing look.

“Move!” Brian roared. “You don’t have any time to waste!”

Tess flew to the bathroom sink, raked a few possessions into a paper bag, then shoved it into the backpack Brian held. He passed the pack to Justin.

“I’ll get the car,” Brian said, running to the door. “Be ready when I pull around.”

Justin poked a small stack of cash into his jeans pocket. “We’re right behind you, Bri.”

As Tess climbed into the backseat of Brian’s Accord, Justin spotted Morelli coming out of the motel office with the clerk. Morelli’s gaze found his, and Justin’s stomach pitched. “He saw us! Burn rubber, Bri!” Justin jumped into the backseat with Tess. Brian tore out of the parking space before Justin could even close the car door.

As Brian raced from the motel parking lot, he nearly flattened Morelli, who ran in front of the car, trying to stop them.

“Well, that’d be one way to get rid of him,” Justin muttered. He clung to the seat as Brian sped out onto the two-lane road.