Changing Focus (5 page)

If anything, it had only added to it. Still, she’d have to keep her wild side in check. He didn’t look like the type to scare easily, but you just never knew. At least he was big enough to defend himself if she did get out of hand. Olivia glanced at the ever-present medicine bottle.

“No, no and no. I am not going to dull myself with that junk. Tonight I can handle this. I will not turn into some crazy monster woman.”

One last look in the mirror and she stepped into the heels that had cost her one and a half freelance articles. Sylvie, her best friend, called them CFM shoes. Olivia had only asked her once what that stood for, but once had been enough.
“Come fuck me” indeed.
She dabbed a small bit of perfume on her wrists, the base of her throat and between her breasts.

One hand on the railing gave her confidence on the sky-high heels as she descended. Mouthwatering aromas rose to greet her. She inhaled deeply and smiled. If she didn’t know better, she could swear that in all the many smells coming from the kitchen, Micah’s wove in and out. She shook her head. No way could she smell the man. She really needed to get that out of her head.

* * * * *

Olivia pushed her plate back with a sigh. “You’d better be right about me burning these calories off during the day or I’ll never fit into my clothes again!” She smiled at her dinner companion.

He leaned away from the table, rocking his chair back on two legs. A slow smile curved across his face as he nodded. “Shall we have coffee on the couch? I’ll throw a few logs on the fire if you don’t mind getting it? I take mine black.”

It felt natural to clear the dishes as Micah moved to the wood hopper to build the fire up again. Olivia rolled her neck then set the plates on the counter. She poured the coffee and turned back to find Micah right there.

“You move so fast and so silently. You nearly wore this coffee.” She looked at his hand now holding one of the cups. He’d grabbed it in self-protection. “I didn’t even know you were there.”

“Didn’t you?” His soft voice held a note of question. Olivia just shook her head and laughed at him. His eyes shifted color again. She didn’t know how he did that. She’d never met anyone with changing eyes. They seemed to catch the firelight, throwing it back at her. His eyes narrowed as his nostrils flared slightly. He leaned toward her. Instinct had her backing up until she hit the counter.

Micah slid forward, putting his arms on either side of her. She heard the clink of his coffee cup landing on the counter behind her. She should feel trapped-instead she felt the heat of his gaze burning her. Olivia tilted her head up as her tongue darted out over her lips. His eyes tracked the movement and she knew a kiss had to be next.

Instead, Micah drew soft knuckles down her cheek. “Come to the couch, Olivia. Let’s talk.”

She followed him to the sofa, drinking in the way his shoulders moved.
And his ass.
Olivia heard her own small sigh. The man had the nicest rear she’d ever seen. Everything about him seemed sculpted and perfect. Her nipples tightened. What would he feel like naked under her hands?

“Olivia?” Micah turned back to her. His eyes seemed to melt when he looked at her. She turned her head to the side, embarrassed by her own thoughts.

“Sorry.” She offered him a smile. “I got caught up in thinking about my article.”

He folded himself down to the couch, patting a cushion beside him. “Sit and tell me what you’re writing. I’m fascinated to hear what you have so far.”

Olivia launched into her article. She spoke for some time until the crackling of the fire distracted her. “I’m sorry. You must be bored stiff.” She smiled at Micah.

“On the contrary, I think you’re incredible. To take what we did and turn it into that is amazing to me. I can’t do that. You are a natural-born storyteller.”

Olivia felt her skin warm at the praise. “Thank you, Daddy always said…” her voice trailed off.

“Olivia?” Micah reached out to stroke her hair.

“I’m sorry. That’s so unusual for me to remember my birth father. I just had this clear memory of him laughing at me and telling me I was born to tell tales like my Babushka.”

“Babushka? Isn’t that Russian?”

“I think so. My birth name was Volksson.”

Micah jerked. “I know some Volkssons but they live in upstate New York above Buffalo.”

“Really? I tried to find family once. I was sixteen and found my adoption papers. I mean I knew I was adopted but I thought maybe I could find someone who would know.” She stopped herself. “Sorry, it was just a girl’s dream of wanting to belong to someone.”

Micah wrapped a long arm around her shoulders. Olivia let herself lean into him. “I’ve always wanted to belong to someone, you know? I had family with the Decaturs until I kill…until they died.”

Micah’s soft voice rasped in her ear. “Killed them? Olivia, you told me they died in a car wreck.”

A shudder racked her as she took a deep breath. “Micah, I was thirteen. We were driving home from a band concert. My mother and I were arguing about whether or not I could go to the Harvest Dance. I remember it all so very clearly. The moon looked like some giant spotlight and I thought if I didn’t get to go to that dance, I might as well die.

“Then I don’t know what happened. Something must have run out in the road. When I came to, I was standing by this oak tree. My clothes were ripped and torn. They were hanging off me. I saw the car. Oh god, the car.” She stuffed a hand over her mouth as tears filled her eyes.

“Sweetheart, you don’t have to talk about this. It was an accident. You didn’t do anything.”

She felt him drop a soft kiss on her head. “No, I want to tell you this. It’s important. My therapist tells me to let these things out. So I saw the car. It was upside down and there was smoke pouring out. I ran to it. I still don’t know how I did this but I got the door open and I pulled my dad out. He was…he was already gone.

“Then I got Mom out. She was still alive. But when she saw me, oh Micah. When she saw me,” Olivia curled in closer to his warmth, “she screamed at me to get away from her. She called me a monster. I knew then that I’d done something. I’d caused the wreck. She died screaming at me, Micah.” Olivia turned tear-filled eyes up to him. “And I don’t know why.”

Micah didn’t say a word. He just wrapped his other arm around her and pulled her into his lap. He cradled her head against his chest as she wept. She felt his chest rumble as he murmured soothing sounds while his hand swept across her hair and down her back. Olivia couldn’t stop the tears even though she hated the feeling of weakness. Somehow, being in Micah’s arms made it safe to fall apart.

She wept for her parents and for herself. Nothing had ever been the same after their deaths. She’d continued to have those blackouts at least once a month. Her therapist told her that the full moon probably triggered them because of the accident happening on the full moon. Olivia slid her arms around Micah, holding on for dear life. She didn’t even know when she cried herself to sleep.

Micah stood carefully, balancing her slight weight in his arms. Olivia’s head lolled against his shoulder as he carried her out of the living room and up the stairs to her room. He wanted to take her to his apartment, lay her down on his bed and simply hold her through the night. How she had to have suffered all this time.

Thinking she’d killed her adoptive parents, never knowing that her ability to shift didn’t make her a monster. If she’d been thirteen at the time of the wreck, obviously she’d gone through her first shift in the backseat of that car. Most shifters had their first experience with the change at puberty. Strong emotions, rampant teenage hormones and the full moon, all of those things contributed to the first shift.

Seeing a wolf in the backseat of a car where your daughter had just been would have been enough to cause anyone to lose control of a car. Anyone who wasn’t aware that their child-adoptive child-was a shifter, that is. Olivia’s mother had been wrong to call her a monster, but now he knew why she hadn’t responded to any of the verbal and nonverbal cues he’d tossed her way. Olivia had reached adulthood not knowing what she was, what they both were.

He put her down on the bed, lifting her body to pull the duvet and blankets out from under her. She looked so beautiful, almost ethereal there among the dark bedclothes. His hands trembled slightly as he removed her shoes. Those shoes…every male fantasy come to life, a beautiful woman dressed in silk wearing those shoes.

Hesitating slightly, he set the shoes down beside the bed. He wanted to carefully undress her, strip himself and crawl into the bed with her, giving her his warmth, the comfort of his body, the peace gained from sleeping with someone there to watch over you, but he knew she wouldn’t see it that way. She’d be horrified in the morning to wake naked beside him.

Shifters often shared space when sleeping. It wasn’t sexual, it was simply Pack behavior. He’d shared a bed with three of his brothers before leaving the reservation to join the Army.

Instead of following those instincts, he slowly pulled her shirt out of the waistband of her skirt. His intent had been to make her more comfortable, but the sight of the creamy skin at her waist set off warning signals in his brain. An overloaded libido could only take so much and the sight of Olivia in such a vulnerable position was all he could handle. Pulling the covers up to her shoulders, Micah moved across the room.

He rebuilt the fire in her fireplace, glancing over his shoulder from time to time just to ensure she slept soundly. Settling himself in one of the chairs by the fireplace, he decided to wait and watch her through the night.

Olivia shoved the covers off her upper body. She felt incredibly warm and unsure how she’d managed to make it up to her room. The last thing she remembered… Sitting straight up, Olivia felt her breath catch. The last thing she remembered was Micah pulling her into his arms, stroking her hair and back as she cried all over him. She’d told him things last night she had never mentioned to anyone other than her therapist.

She realized she was in her room and swung her legs over the side of the bed. Well, at least this time she hadn’t awakened naked. No, she woke fully clothed except for her shoes. No wonder she’d felt uncomfortable. Her skirt had become twisted around her waist, her bra cutting into her chest. Only when she’d started toward the bathroom did she hear the soft sound of someone else’s breathing.

Olivia froze, trying to calm herself. Turning toward the fireplace, she saw a definite shadow that didn’t belong. Stepping cautiously toward it, she exhaled when she realized the lump in the chair was Micah. His long legs were stretched out in front of him, his arms crossed at his chest and his head resting on the back of the chair.

He didn’t look very comfortable, but he did look incredibly inviting. She truly wanted to curl up in his arms again, only this time with both of them awake and her not crying all over him.

Olivia had never thought of herself as a risk-taker. She’d never thought of herself as particularly daring or brave, but she decided now would be the perfect time to start. Micah had shown that he had a tender side by carrying her upstairs and putting her to bed. Now she wanted to see a wilder side to him.

She knew the attraction she felt for him wasn’t one-sided. Considering her options, Olivia took a deep breath and unzipped her skirt. Pulling it off, she stood before him in the lacy thong, her push-up bra and silk blouse. Unbuttoning the top two buttons on her blouse, Olivia stepped closer to the sleeping Micah.

With one hand she reached out and touched his face. Those incredible brown eyes opened slowly, sleep clouding them. Awareness came sooner than she’d expected, but he didn’t move other than to blink at her. Olivia smiled as she moved closer. Raising both hands to her blouse, she unbuttoned it the rest of the way.

Micah sat up, his eyes gleaming as they followed her motions. Still, he didn’t reach for her, didn’t try to take over. It almost felt as though he knew how important this was to her, knew she had to do this herself. Almost as though he knew she had to take this chance, this opportunity for her own peace of mind.

Moving so that she straddled his legs, Olivia shrugged out of her shirt, letting it fall behind her as she placed her knees on either side of Micah’s legs in the chair.

Putting her hands behind his head, she tugged at the end of his braid until she could unravel his hair. She combed her hands through those silky locks and watched him tilt his head back, his eyes closing in pleasure. Leaning forward, she took advantage of his position to kiss him. Light, teasing kisses along his jaw and cheeks.

Olivia felt his hands lightly touching her shoulders, felt the warmth of his body as he pulled her closer, felt the heat in his gaze as he opened his eyes to stare at her. “Liv.” His voice came out sleep-roughened and deep.

No one else had ever shortened her name, but Olivia wanted to hear him say that again. With nothing more being said between them, she leaned forward and kissed him. Micah responded immediately, pulling her even closer, but not taking over.

She’d expected him to take control, the fact that he hadn’t told her she made the right move. His hands felt like fire though, molding her shoulders, smoothing down to her waist then to her hips as he urged her even closer. Olivia leaned back slightly, breaking their kiss and pulling his head toward her neck. She didn’t need to say anything, didn’t need to tell him what she wanted, it felt as though he could read her mind.

His hands molded to her butt, cupping and squeezing as he moved his mouth over her neck and shoulders. Olivia leaned farther away, knowing he wouldn’t let her fall. Micah licked across the top of her breasts, then between them, burying his face in the cleavage provided by her bra.

She’d never been so thankful for her friend’s insistence on that particular purchase. His hands slid up her back to the catch of the bra and Olivia let go of his shoulders long enough to slip her arms out of the straps. Micah groaned deep in this throat, the sound causing her body to tighten then respond wildly. His mouth burned a path to her breast. His hands now held her against his body as he nipped and licked his way around her breast.