Catching Lucas Riley (28 page)

“Thanks, Mom.”

Alex returned to Logan the following Sunday, feeling refreshed and ready to face a new phase of life. Although she was still nervous to encounter Sealey and officially ask him to forgive her, she knew that’s what she needed to do.

But she couldn’t find him. She’d tried to call him several times since her conversation with her mother, but he’d never picked up. She’d been tempted to show up at his apartment when she returned to Logan, but she was too afraid of encountering Lucas. It was true that as she more fully accepted the idea that Lucas and Olivia belonged together, the aching around the edges of her heart became easier and easier to bear.

In fact, the time spent in Malibu, away from the situation, had
allowed her to have an epiphany of sorts. She had spent a lot of time thinking through the last few months, focusing specifically on all the key moments spent with Lucas. In those ponderings, Alex detected a red flag that should have alerted her to the likely doom of their relationship, even if Olivia had not been in the picture. That red flag had been a bit of a saving grace in her attempt to forgive herself for the part she’d played in destroying Sealey’s hopes.

Her realization was that Lucas’s hesitancy, from the beginning, to support her in her career goals and dreams was a definite indication that eventually, their relationship would have fizzled. She knew herself. She knew that eventually she would have learned to resent him for holding her back. The thought that she didn’t owe her and Sealey’s current states of relative misery to her choice alone made her feel much better. But that didn’t necessarily mean she wanted to willfully encounter Lucas just yet. Therefore, she would avoid his apartment in her attempt to get in touch with Sealey.

She hadn’t seen or heard from Sealey now for over a week, and she was becoming seriously concerned. While she had called him numerous times, she’d only left one message, and it had been pretty pathetic. She told him again that she was sorry for ruining everything and that she hoped he was okay. She then asked him to call her. He had obviously ignored it.

Now, sitting on a freezing park bench in complete dejection, wanting to get somewhere warm, but dreading the pitying looks she was still receiving from her roommates, she wondered if maybe the time had come to move on. She had thoroughly messed up in Logan, Utah, but maybe that mess was exactly the motivation she needed to do something with her life. To start working toward that dream she’d told Sealey about all those months ago.

The speaking series was the perfect answer to her conundrum. She had almost reached her deadline for getting back to Dr. Welch—she’d actually almost forgotten all about it in the wake of losing Lucas—but now, what reason did she have to stay in Logan? The idea flashed across her mind in ultra-bright neon. Without a second thought, she grabbed for her phone and dialed.

“Fiona Welch,” came the voice on the other end.

“Hi, Dr. Welch,” Alex said, breathlessly. “This is Alex Foamer. I’m
so sorry it’s taken me this long to get back to you. I’d hoped to get my answer to you long before your deadline, but I’ve had some personal issues these past couple of weeks that have kind of laid me flat.”

“Good to hear from you, Alex,” returned Dr. Welch. “Don’t worry about it. I’m running a bit behind schedule myself on the symposium. I hope things are going better for you now.”

“Oh, much better, thanks,” Alex said honestly. Her outlook on life was about a hundred times better than it had been five minutes earlier. “I am very interested in participating in the symposium. Is it possible you might still have a place for me?” Like a fifth-grader, she crossed her fingers.

“Absolutely!” Dr. Welch cried. “Oh, I’m so happy you decided to accept. I’m having a hard time finding people due to the fact that the symposium happens over the holidays.”

“Well, I’d love to take part in it,” Alex replied. “If you can get me the information, I’ll be wherever you need me to be whenever you need me there.”

“That’s what I like to hear!” Dr. Welch laughed. “I’ll email you the information packet and once you have all the necessary forms filled out, we’ll get your travel all scheduled. Make sure to take a look at the subjects we’re planning to cover and get back to me as soon as possible on which ones you’d like to tackle. You’ll need to get started on planning your presentations here in the next week or so.”

“Oh, I’m so excited!” Alex squealed. “I can’t wait to get started!”

After they hung up, Alex sat fidgeting on the park bench, her mind much lighter and airier than it had been in previous weeks. She had a plan, and it felt
so good
.

And then the downer hit. The series would only last three months. Twenty cities. And then she would be back in Logan. What then? Would Lucas and Olivia be married by then? Would Sealey be talking to her by that point?

“Hey.”

Alex’s head shot up. Sealey Witchburn was coming toward her across the frozen ground, a sheepish look on his face. She’d never seen him look sheepish. But the look seemed appropriate. He
should
be sheepish
after what he’d put her through.

“Sealey!” she cried, relief and frustration filling her. “Where have you been?! I’ve been
worried
about you!”

Sealey looked surprised. “You have?” he questioned, brow furrowed. “Why?”

“You just disappeared!” Alex cried. Sealey seated himself next to her and leaned back casually against the bench, eyeing her strangely. “You gave me this wounded, confused look, walked away, and I haven’t seen you or heard from you since! For all I knew, you were suicidal!” she shrieked.

“Really, Alex?” Sealey said, his eyebrow raised. His expression became suddenly much more recognizable. Confidence. Amusement. “Do I strike you as the suicidal sort?”

“Well, no, but next time you decide to disappear like that, just let me know where you’re going, okay? Then I won’t freak out so much. I called and called and I left you a message and you never called back!”

The sheepish look returned to his face. “Sorry,” he apologized. “I went out of town on business and left my phone on the plane. The airline is mailing it back to me. They said I should have it back by tomorrow morning.”

“And you don’t understand the concept of a pay phone?” Alex said, giving him a dirty look. “Or, heck, just
borrowing
a phone? You know, ’cause it’s not like every single person you come in contact with doesn’t have one.”

“You know what it sounds like?” Sealey asked, smiling more genuinely at her now. “It sounds like you missed me.”

Alex stopped short and stared at him. “You think I missed you?” she said, her voice sounding strangled. “You think
that
is what this is about?” Her thoughts felt panicky, but she wasn’t quite sure why.

“Yeah,” he said, his smile widening. “But that’s okay, Foamer. You can miss me. I’m okay with that. In fact, it’s actually really good news.”

“Oh really?” Alex asked with sarcasm, fully expecting some in return. “And why’s that?”

“Because I missed you.” There was no sarcasm. None. Just straight-forward, wide-eyed sincerity.

Alex gawked at him. He had missed her? A strange warmth was filling her chest. She watched him, sitting there, unconcerned. There was
something different in the air. Sealey was on edge. He didn’t look it, but she could feel it. An odd, electric tension was emanating from him.

“You missed me?” she clarified, narrowing her eyes at him.

“Didn’t I just say that?” he said, smiling teasingly at her. “Yes, I did. Very much. Because believe it or not, I’ve gotten pretty used to you, Foamer.” He winked at her.

“Oh, well . . . that’s . . .” Her mind was blank. Confusion swam in her head.
Nice? Interesting? Really, really . . .
“Unexpected,” she finally finished. What was Sealey doing? Why was he sitting here next to her, perfectly composed, with a weird smile on his face? Why didn’t he appear to be devastated about Olivia and Lucas?

“You look like you have something else to say,” Sealey prompted at her perplexed expression. The odd, bright smile was still firmly attached to his face.

“Olivia.” It was the only word Alex could get out. But she thought it would probably indicate the direction of her thoughts.

“Ah, Olivia,” Sealey said. He nodded slowly, as though mulling over his next words. “I lied about Olivia,” he said smoothly.

Whatever words she had been expecting, those were not the ones.

“I’m sorry, what?” she said, uncomprehending.

“I lied,” Sealey said straightforwardly. “I told you I was in love with Olivia and that I wanted to take her away from Lucas. I lied.” He shrugged as he dropped this bombshell, as though its impact were a sad inevitability. For some reason, the careless motion calmed Alex enough to clear her head and allow her to think. Because while he appeared to be uncaring, she knew he wasn’t. Something in the taut position of his shoulders told her he was every bit as aware of the import of his words as she was.

“So . . . you never planned to take her away from Lucas?” Alex clarified.

“No,” he stated. “I never planned to steal her away. I never even considered something like that to be possible.”

“So then, why—” Alex began, but Sealey interrupted her.

“I was never in love with her, either,” he said calmly. “Olivia is an amazing woman, but she’s Lucas’s amazing woman. She always has been.”

Alex looked at him incredulously. She knew he was trying to tell her something beyond what he was saying. Otherwise the electricity in the air would have fizzled by now. “Okay, but . . . but . . .
why
would you do this?
Why
would you bother to tell me you were in love with Olivia if you weren’t?”

“Because I needed a plausible excuse,” Sealey said, looking at her earnestly. “I needed a reason for why I was helping you with the Lucas project and that was the only one I could come up with on short notice. You caught me off guard with your demands to know my reasoning, and that was the first thing I thought of.”

Alex stared at him. She understood the words coming out of his mouth, but she had no idea what he was trying to tell her.

“Sealey,” she said, quite impressed with her ability to keep her voice calm and regulated. “Please.
Please
tell me what’s going on here. Why are you telling me this now? Why did you lie to me? And more than anything, if you weren’t in love with Olivia,
why
did you spend three months attempting to bring me and Lucas together?”

Sealey smiled softly and genuinely at the confused look on her face. Again, a reaction Alex had not been expecting. He was a completely different person than the depressed, defeated, disappointed man she had been anticipating. He seemed almost . . . happy.

“Alex,” he said, looking into her eyes. He moved forward, taking her hand. He raised his other hand and brushed his fingers across her face. Strange tingles and sparks raced up and down her arms and legs. She almost jerked away, so unexpected was the contact. “It was because of you. For me, it’s always been you.”

“
What’s
always been me?” she pressed. She glanced down at their clasped hands, feeling as though she was missing something both very important and very obvious. She couldn’t help thinking that if he would just
back up
and let her thoughts clear a bit, she would immediately understand what he was trying to say. But he wasn’t moving and her mind remained clouded with a mixture of confusion, numbness, and sheer panic. “What are you talking about, Sealey?”

“I never intended to let Lucas have you. This entire process, the last three months,” he replied, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “For me, it’s all been about me and you. I only ever wanted you.”

H
E SPOKE THE
last words softly, in a tone Alex had never actually heard him use before. It was warm and sincere. Vulnerable.

Alex was holding her breath, unconsciously hoping that might aid her verbal comprehension. “How does that make any semblance of sense?” she finally asked. “The whole point of the project was to bring Lucas and me together, and you and Olivia together. It couldn’t have possibly accomplished anything else.”

The warmth of his hand against her cheek was muddying her thought processes. She felt her legs begin to shake slightly in response to his touch.