Caroline's Secret (14 page)

Esther blushed. “We had a
gut
time,” she said simply. “Though not as eventful as yours.”

Whether that was a
gut
thing or a bad thing, Caroline wasn’t sure.

“But I think we may be connecting. With the Lord on my side, he may even notice me yet.”

Andrew pushed his hat back on his head and wiped the sweat from his brow. Today had turned out hotter than yesterday, and talk at the hardware store said it was only going to get worse.

The warmer weather was one thing he hadn’t gotten used to yet. Perhaps it would take a couple of years . . . if he even decided to stay.

He settled his hat back in place and started the tractor for the return trip into town. He’d come out to the farm to pick up the special-order bench-and-table set his uncle had made for a couple in Tulsa. They were arriving this afternoon to pick it up, and his
onkle
only told him after lunch was over that it was needed at the showroom in town.

Not that Andrew had eaten much during mealtime. Food tasted like the sawdust that peppered the workroom floor. And his eyes felt like grit. He hadn’t slept much last night. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was Caroline’s sweet face, those hazel eyes looking like bottomless green pools as she stared up at him.

Why had he kissed her? Even more, why had he kissed her like
that
? He could have given her a friendly peck on the cheek. It was not normal for Amish to kiss one another in passing, but it would have been a sight better than the kiss they shared.

Nay
, better wasn’t the word. That kiss couldn’t have gotten much better, but it would have been for sure more appropriate to kiss her cheek, shake her hand, or even just tip his hat, but no . . .

Instead, he had pulled her close and kissed her in a way that he had never kissed another. Not even his beloved Beth.

Andrew wiped his forehead again, checking the gauges on the tractor as he chugged along. Was it getting even hotter outside?

Oklahoma weather was unpredictable as it came, but his discomfort now had more to do with thoughts of last night than the actual atmosphere around him.

He pulled the tractor into the lot behind the shop to unload the furniture straight into the storeroom.

Danny came out, the sound of the tractor alerting him to the fact his cousin had returned.

Andrew swung himself to the ground and went around to the attached wagon to unhook the bungee cords and the padding he had wrapped around the two benches and matching table.

“Danki,”
he said to Danny as his cousin began to help him unwind all the wrappings. Together they carried the furniture through the back door of the shop.

“So what happened with Sarah yesterday? I saw you talking to her.”

Andrew set down his end of the bench. “We talked about how I’m not ready to start courtin’ and that I have a cousin who insists on interfering with my decisions.”

“Anyone I know?”

“And that if he’s not careful, he could wind up getting her hopes up for something that is never going to happen.”

“Sarah told Julie that you told her that she would be the first to know when you are ready.”

“That’s not exactly what I said.” He made his way back outside and waited for his cousin to come take up his end of the next piece.

“That seems to be what she heard.”

Andrew sighed. He’d come to Oklahoma to get away from his troubles with women. It seemed that he had traded grief for two women he had no idea what to do with: one who wanted to spend time with him, and one whom he wanted to spend time with.

The thought brought him up short. He must have jerked, stilled, or jumped. Whatever he did, it brought Danny’s attention around to him.

“You
allrecht
?”

Andrew nodded, unable to speak.
“Jah,”
he finally croaked, but the word was anything but convincing. He wanted to spend time with Caroline. More than time. He wanted to get to know her. Discover why she had come to Wells Landing from Tennessee. Find out all there was to know about Emma’s father. Everything there was to know about Caroline.

Danny continued to talk as they carried the second bench and then the table into the storeroom.

“Okay, Andrew?”

“What?” Andrew looked from his cousin to his uncle.

When had
Onkle
come into the room?

“I asked if you wanted to come to eat with me tonight,” Danny repeated.

“Nay.”

“You didn’t even let me say who I was eating with.”

Andrew shook his head. “I don’t want to know.” But he did want to go see Caroline.

“You like her.” Danny’s words were filled with surprise.

Had he said that last part out loud?

“Jah.”
There. He’d admitted it. He liked Caroline Hostetler. Maybe even more than liked. He wanted to go see her. See Emma. Spend time with them. Drink lemonade. Play board games. Get to know each other better.

“
Ach
, that’s
gut
.” Abe wiped his hands on a rag, then stuffed it in his back pocket. “She’s a good one, that Caroline.”

Andrew smiled, getting used to the idea of liking someone even if it felt a little too soon since Beth had died. But maybe this was all part of God’s plan.

Abe patted him on the back and hobbled toward the door of the shop. “Polish this up and wait on the
Englisch
to come by and pick it up, then you can take the rest of the day off. ”

He was going to need it. It was going to take some time to fully embrace the idea of liking Caroline Hostetler. He smiled to himself. But it was a challenge he was looking forward to conquering.

Caroline pulled a large pan of sourdough rolls from the oven and sat them on the cooling rack. Her eyes flickered to the wall and the large industrial clock that hung there.

Today had slowed to a crawl as she waited for . . . what? What exactly was she waiting for? Andrew to come down and apologize? Say he was glad he had kissed her? Or that he was remorseful because his heart still belonged to another?

She sighed. The last was the most logical. It hadn’t been so very long since he had lost his love. It had been two years since she had last seen Trey. And she knew deep down that she would most probably never see him again. They had made their choices. No sense going back on it now.

“What’s wrong,
liebschen
?”

“Nix.”

Esther shook her head. “You and I both know that is not the truth.”

Caroline sighed again. Checked the clock again. Shook her own head.

“Andrew?” Esther asked.

“Jah.”
He had been on her mind nonstop since the night before. She had hardly slept, hardly eaten, barely dragged herself to work. Not that lying about would be any more productive. She needed to talk to Andrew. Clear the air, figure out what had happened between them the night before.

Truth was she needed to hear him say it, that he was still in love with another and he had no right kissing her the way he did.

Once he said that, she could start pushing it from her mind, right where it belonged.

“Why don’t you walk down to the furniture store and talk to him?”

The strings on her prayer
kapp
swayed as she shook her head.
“Nay.”
It would never do for her to be so forward as to walk down there and demand he talk to her. The idea was as brazen as the English. Her Swartzentruber upbringing would not allow that.

Esther patted her arm. “I don’t think he’d think less of you.”

“Nay,”
Caroline repeated. She would have to wait until her opportunity to talk to Andrew.

Somehow she knew he would be down to talk to her. Eventually. She would just bide her time and bite her lip until he came to see her.

It was Thursday morning before Andrew got the courage to walk down to the bakery and talk to Caroline. Even then, she was in the park, no doubt having lunch with Lorie and Emily. But when he made his way across the street, he found her sitting at a table staring at a sandwich. She was alone.

“Mind if I sit down?”

Her head jerked up and her eyes widened. She swallowed hard and gave a nod.

He stepped over the picnic table bench and sat directly across from her. “I’ve been meaning to come down and see you.” For the last four days he had been thinking about what he wanted to say to her. Mulling over what needed to be talked about. Now the words deserted him.

“Jah”,
she agreed, staring at some point above the crown of his hat.

“I . . . I guess I should say I’m sorry for kissing you, but that’s not the truth.”

Her gaze whipped to his.

“I know we had an agreement and all, but . . .” He held his hands out palms up.

“But what?” she asked on a whisper. Her hands nervously folded a paper napkin until it was no bigger than a quarter.

He took her trembling fingers into his own, stilling their busy motions. “But I think God brought me here for a reason.”

She shook her head, a myriad of mixed emotions swimming in her hazel eyes. “I don’t know what to say.”

Andrew smiled. “
Jah
or
nay
would be a
gut
start.”

“What about Beth?”

He still held her hands in his, and he gave them a reassuring squeeze. “I guess this goes to show that God’s plan is in His time.”

She dropped her gaze to their joined hands.

“We don’t have to make any commitment or promises. I know you are dealing with the loss of Emma’s father. We can just take it slow and see where it leads us. We could come out of this just friends or . . .”

“Or what?”

“Or more.” He offered a small shrug. “I don’t know what will happen.”

“Are you asking to court me?”

A small smile trembled on his lips. “I guess I am.”

It seemed hours before she answered. “
Allrecht
then,” she finally said. “We’ll take it slow.”

Happy warmth burst in his chest. He squeezed her trembling fingers between his own. No firm plans, just a promise to get to know one another better. But in the beauty of her smile, he saw the future and it was
gut
.

The bell over the bakery chimed its warning. Esther looked up to see Caroline walk in.

“Did you have a
gut middawk
?” Esther asked.

“Um . . .
Jah
,” Caroline answered. “Andrew met me out there.”

“I know. He came by here looking for you. I sent him over there. Did you get a chance to talk?”

“Jah.”
She went to the sink and washed her hands, concentrating on the task with more attention than it truly warranted.

Something must have happened during Caroline’s break that dazed her.

The thought had no sooner crossed Esther’s mind than Andrew opened the bakery door, sticking his head inside. “I forgot. Would you like to come out to the farm tonight? I thought we could have supper and maybe let Emma play with the puppies for a while.”

“That sounds
gut
.”

“I’ll come by in the buggy about seven,
jah
?”

“We’ll be ready.”

“You too, Esther.”

Esther swung her attention back to Andrew. “Me?”

“
Jah
. I’m sure
Onkle
would love to have you over as well.”

She certainly hoped so. They’d had a
gut
time together Sunday, but she couldn’t say that he’d made any indication that they would ever be anything more than
freinden
.

“See you tonight.” He gave them a wave and started back down the street toward the furniture store.

Esther turned to Caroline. “Would you like to tell me what that was about?”

Caroline shook her head.
“Nix,”
she said, drying her hands on a paper towel and throwing it into the trash. “Andrew wants us to get to know each other better.”

Esther clapped her hands together in sheer glee. “Oh, that is
gut
! Like dating?”

“Like seeing if maybe we might want to court.”

Esther propped her hands on her hips and studied her young friend. “That doesn’t sound definite at all.”

Caroline shrugged. “We’re going to take it slow.”

They might be saying that, but if two people ever belonged together, it was Andrew and Caroline. Little Emma needed a father in her life, and if Esther had even one thing to say about it, that father would be Andrew Fitch.