Brothers (58 page)

Baldy Li, still in his tattered clothing, didn't have anything to eat or drink, and therefore he would pick up whatever odds and ends he could find, including canned goods, bottles of mineral water, newspapers, and cardboard boxes, which he then piled up in the entrance-way The government employees on their way to work knew that Baldy Li collected scrap, so they all brought him their old newspapers, boxes, et cetera Baldy Li then made the space next to the entranceway into a recycling center. Therefore, whenever he saw someone walking by with a newspaper, he would call out and ask if he could have it when they were done. Similarly, when people walked by with drinks, he would ask for their empty bottles. Sometimes he would see people wearing old clothes and would suggest, "It is really quite a loss of face for someone of your position to be wearing such tattered clothing. How about if you take it off and give it to me?"

Baldy Li had wanted to return to the Good Works Factory but didn't succeed and instead went into the scrap business. The townspeople started calling him Scrap Collector Li. At first he collected scrap in order to feed himself, never imagining that this would make him famous; he was soon known far and wide as the Scrap King of Liu, equaling his childhood reputation as Liu's King of Butts. Whenever the townspeople had something to throw out, they would ask him to come retrieve it. While he was still staging his sit-in, about which he was exceedingly conscientious, he would tell them that he couldn't go retrieve it at that moment, but he would commit their address to memory, and he'd promise, "I'll come for it when I get off work."

CHAPTER 45

L
IN HONG
was completely immersed in her happiness. Her handsome husband would take her to the knitting factory every morning on his shiny and fashionable Eternity bicycle. Walking into the factory, she would repeatedly turn and see Song Gang standing next to his bicycle waving at her. When she walked out each evening, he would be waiting there for her, smiling broadly. Lin Hong didn't know that he was helping Baldy Li behind her back, and by the time she discovered it, this had been going on for a month.

The first time Lin Hong noticed that the money and grain coupons were missing from Song Gangs pocket, she smiled and, without saying anything, replaced them with another twenty cents and two more grain coupons. Standing nearby, Song Gang also didn't say anything, though her heartfelt smile made him feel very uneasy.

Lin Hong didn't realize that Baldy Li made off every day with Song Gang's money and grain coupons. Every day without fail she would refill Song Gang's pockets. At first she was delighted that he seemed to be taking better care of himself and had finally recognized that, when he was hungry, he should buy himself something to eat. Gradually, however, she began to find it strange that he had gone from not being willing to spend anything at all to always spending everything he had with him, never even coming back with any change. She figured that, no matter what he was buying himself to eat, at least there should be some change left over. She looked at him suspiciously, but he avoided her gaze. Finally she asked him directly, "What do you eat every day?"

Song Gang opened his mouth, but no words came out. Lin Hong asked him again, but he merely shook his head and said that he hadn't eaten anything. She stared in astonishment, but he again avoided her gaze then reluctantly confessed, "I give it all to Baldy Li."

Lin Hong stood speechless in the middle of the room. Only then did she remember that Baldy Li had become a beggar, because up to that point she had completely forgotten about his existence. In her world there was only Song Gang; now that bastard Baldy Li had once again shoved his way in. When Lin Hong estimated that, over the course of
the past month, Baldy Li had taken about six yuan from them, she couldn't help crying. Repeating "Six yuan" over and over to herself, she noted that, if they economized, that would have been enough for the two of them to live for an entire month.

Song Gang bowed his head and sat down on the edge of the bed, unable to bring himself to look at her. It wasn't until she burst into tears and asked him how he could have done something like this that he finally raised his head, looked her in the eye, and said, "He is my brother."

"But he isn't even your biological brother," Lin Hong responded. "And even if he were, he should still support himself."

"He is my brother," Song Gang repeated. "Eventually he will be able to support himself, but before our mother died, she asked me to look after him—"

"Don't bring up that stepmother of yours," Lin Hong interrupted.

Song Gang was hurt by Lin Hong's remark and shouted back, "She was my mother!"

Lin Hong stared at Song Gang in astonishment—this being the first time since their marriage that Song Gang had raised his voice to her. She shook her head silently. Realizing that Song Gang had yelled at her after she said "stepmother," she knew that she had misspoken. She didn't dare say another word, and the room fell silent.

Song Gang sat with his head bowed, a blizzard of memories swirling back to him. It was as if he and Baldy Li had forged a path through a blizzard, a path that had gradually extended to the present day but had then suddenly disappeared. He was lost in thought and at a loss as to what to do. It was as if the white snow blanketed all possible paths. It wasn't until he caught sight of Lin Hong's feet as she stood there in the middle of the room that he finally came to his senses. He noticed that her shoes and pants were both threadbare and knew that her shirt was old, too. When he thought of how she economized every day, he became distraught and felt that it had been truly wrong of him to give Baldy Li money behind her back.

After a long time passed, Lin Hong realized that Song Gang had no intention of speaking. Feeling herself getting angry again, she snapped, "Say something."

Song Gang lifted his head and earnestly said, "I was wrong."

Her heart immediately softened. She looked at Song Gang's earnest eyes and couldn't help but sigh. Then she started trying to console him,
saying that six yuan was not very much money that they could pretend it had been simply stolen. She suggested that sometimes an unexpected loss might help avert a future adversity. Lin Hong insisted, however, that Song Gang have nothing more to do with Baldy Li. She took another twenty cents and two grain coupons from her purse and placed them in Song Gangs pocket. He was moved by her gesture but said, "I don't need any more money."

"You do need it." Lin Hong looked at him. "But you should definitely spend it on yourself."

After they went to bed that evening, they engaged in their usual pillow talk. Song Gang tenderly embraced Lin Hong, and Lin Hong, with a sweet smile, basked in his inexhaustible love for her. Even after she fell asleep, a smile remained on her face.

When he got off work the next day, Song Gang rode his bike to the knitting factory to pick Lin Hong up. When Baldy Li, who was still staging his sit-in, spotted him, he immediately jumped up and called out. Song Gangs heart skipped a beat when he heard Baldy Li. He brought the bike to a halt and stood there, and as he heard Baldy Li walking over, Song Gang was afraid he would ask him again for money. Baldy Li did, in fact, extend his hand and say shamelessly, "Song Gang, I haven't eaten or drunk anything all day."

His pulse pounding, Song Gang reflexively reached into his pocket and grabbed the money and grain coupons he had there. Then, however, he blushed and shook his head. "I don't have anything today."

Baldy Li was tremendously disappointed and reluctantly pulled back his hand. He swallowed his saliva and, with a downcast expression, said, "I have been swallowing my saliva all day, and now I have to swallow my own fucking saliva all night as well."

At this point, Song Gang, as if possessed, took the money and grain coupons out of his pocket and handed them to the downcast Baldy Li. Baldy Li laughed in surprise and cursed as he accepted the money, "Damn it, you've also learned duplicity!"

Song Gang laughed sadly as he rode away. That night the moment Song Gang had been dreading most took place after dinner, when Lin Hong checked his pocket and discovered that his money and grain coupons were gone. This time she had been expecting to find them there, and when she found that they were gone, she became very alarmed. She looked at Song Gang fearfully, hoping that he would tell her that this time he had spent the money on himself. When she put
her hand in his pocket, Song Gang closed his eyes in agony, and when he reopened them and saw her frightened face, he said with a trembling voice, "I was wrong."

Lin Hong realized that it was Baldy Li who had taken the money and grain coupons. She looked disappointedly at him and then began screaming in fury, "Why did you have to do that?"

Song Gang was mortified. He wanted to explain, but the only words that came out were "I was wrong."

Lin Hong wept tears of fury. Biting her lip, she said, "I just gave you this money yesterday, and today you immediately went and gave it to Baldy Li. Couldn't you at least have waited a few days? Couldn't you have just let me be happy for a few days?"

Song Gang hated himself. He gritted his teeth as if he wanted to castigate himself, but what came out were those same three words: "I was wrong."

"Don't say that again!" Lin Hong cried. "That's all you can say, and I'm tired of hearing it."

Song Gang didn't dare say anything else. Instead, he bowed his head and stood in a corner, as his father, Song Fanping, had done when he was being struggled against during the Cultural Revolution. Lin Hong cried as she spoke, and Song Gang stood there without showing any reaction. Lin Hong felt angry and hurt and wanted to give Song Gang the cold shoulder, so she lay down on the bed and muffled herself with the covers. He stood silently for a while and then began to move around the room. Lin Hong heard the sounds of pots and dishes and knew that he was fixing dinner. The room gradually grew dark as he finished dinner, took it to the table, and then prepared the bowls and chopsticks. Lin Hong thought that he should come over and say something, but he merely sat down at the table. The room fell once again into deathly quiet. Lin Hong fumed as the room became pitch-dark but still he just sat there without moving, as if he were waiting for her to wake up and have dinner with him.

Lin Hong knew that Song Gang was capable of sitting like that forever; if she remained in bed until the sun came up, he would sit there until morning. Even his breathing was almost imperceptible, as if he were afraid of waking her up. Lin Hong began to feel sorry for Song Gang, thinking of all his good qualities, his love for her, his honesty and loyalty, as well as his good looks… Upon thinking of his good looks, she grinned and couldn't resist calling out to him, "Song Gang."

He stood up, but she didn't say anything more. He hesitated a moment, unwilling to sit back down. When Lin Hong saw his hesitation, she once again couldn't help grinning and said softly, "Song Gang, come over here."

He walked to the bedside and leaned over. Lin Hong continued with a quiet voice, "Song Gang, sit down."

He carefully sat on the edge of the bed. She took his hand and said, "Come closer."

He sat closer, and Lin Hong held his hand to her breast, saying, "Song Gang, you are too softhearted. In the future, I won't be able to give you any more money."

Song Gang nodded in the dark. Lin Hong placed his hand on her face and asked, "You aren't angry, are you?"

Song Gang shook his head. "No."

Lin Hong sat up, pulled over his other hand, and told him tenderly, "I don't want to say anything bad about Baldy Li. And even if he were a good person, the problem is that we still wouldn't be able to support him. How much do we earn each month? In the future, we might have children and will have a responsibility to raise them, and therefore we can't afford the added burden of having to support him. Now that Baldy Li is unemployed, if he can't get by, he will become completely dependent on you. Song Gang, it's not the present I'm worried about; it's the future. Please, for the sake of our future children, you need to cut off relations with Baldy Li."

Song Gang nodded again in the dark, but Lin Hong couldn't see him clearly and asked, "Song Gang, did you nod?"

Song Gang nodded again and said, "Yes, I nodded."

Lin Hong paused, then asked, "Am I right?"

Song Gang nodded. "You are right."

After the storm that evening, everything returned to a state of calm, and in the days that followed Song Gang began to avoid Baldy Li. When Song Gang got off work and went to the knitting factory to pick up Lin Hong, he had to go past the gate to the county government building where Baldy Li was holding his sit-down protest. In order to avoid him, Song Gang took the long way around, thereby making Lin Hong wait a long time at the factory. It used to be that he would be waiting there as soon as she walked out the door, but now she would sit there waiting, craning her neck this way and that, and it was not until long after her workmates had already gone home that he hurriedly
biked over. One day she finally lost her temper and sat gloomily on the back of his bike, not saying a single word the entire ride. When they got home, she started to upbraid Song Gang, saying that she was very anxious waiting there at the gate, worried that something might have happened to him and thinking that perhaps he had crashed into an electrical pole and cracked his skull open. Song Gang hemmed and hawed as he tried to explain that he was late because he had taken the long way around in order to avoid Baldy Li. Hearing this, Lin Hong responded loudly, "What are you afraid of?"

Lin Hong said that the more people were afraid of someone like Baldy Li, the more he would bully them. She told Song Gang that, in the future, he would go right past the door to the county government.

"You shouldn't go see him. Just act as if he isn't there."

Song Gang asked her, "And if he calls out to me?"

"Act as if you didn't hear him," Lin Hong answered. "Act as if he doesn't exist."

CHAPTER 46