Brothers (24 page)

Li Lan lowered her head in shame. The men rested for a while, then continued discussing their options. The man in charge said to Li Lan, "There's only one way: We have to smash his knees to fold his calves over. Then he'll fit."

Li Lan turned deathly pale and shook her head over and over again. Trembling, she said, "No, no…"

"Well, there's nothing else we can do."

The men got up and started collecting their levers and ropes, shrugging their shoulders and waving their hands. As they walked outside Li Lan followed them, pleading pitifully, "Is there nothing else you can do?"

They turned back, saying, "No—well, you can see for yourself."

The four men from the coffin shop carried their tools and walked into the alleyway. Li Lan trailed behind them, pleading pitifully, "Is there really no other way?"

They replied firmly, "No."

As the men walked out of the alley the man in charge paused and
turned to Li Lan. "Just think. Who leaves a dead mans feet outside of the coffin? No matter what, it's still better than having his feet dangling out."

Li Lan lowered her head and said brokenheartedly "Whatever you say."

The four men returned to the house, and Li Lan pitifully trailed in after them. Silently, she shook her head, walked up to the coffin, and gazed for a while at Song Fanping inside. She then bent down, reaching both hands into the coffin, and carefully rolled up Song Fanpings pants legs. As she did so she once again saw all the bruises on his calves. Trembling all over, she rolled Song Fanpings pants above his knees. When she looked up, her eyes met those of Baldy Li and Song Gang, and she quickly looked away. She led the boys by the hand and walked into the inner room. She shut the door behind her, sat down on the bed, and closed her eyes. Baldy Li and Song Gang sat on either side of her, her arms hugging their shoulders tight.

From the outside room the man in charge yelled, "Lets start smashing!"

Li Lan s body jerked as if she were being electrocuted, and Baldy Li and Song Gangs bodies jolted in response. By this time a crowd had gathered outside the house, including neighbors and passersby as well as others attracted by the commotion. A mass of them crowded the door, and a few even tumbled into the house. They excitedly discussed how the men from the coffin shop were shattering Song Fanpings knees. Li Lan and the children hadn't realized how they were going to smash his knees, but now they heard them talking about bricks, which then shattered, and how they used the back of a cleaver. There was so much of a din outside that they couldn't make out clearly what everyone was saying. They could only hear people whooping and hollering, as well as the sounds of smashing, dull thuds, and occasional sharp snaps—that was the sound of bone crunching.

Baldy Li and Song Gang couldn't stop trembling. Their bodies shook until they sounded like branches being whipped in a thunderstorm. They were shocked by their own bodies—what would make them shake so hard? It was only later that they realized that it was Li Lan's arms that were shaking and her body that was vibrating like an engine.

The four men outside finally managed to shatter Song Fanpings kneecaps. The man in charge said, "Pick out those bits of brick from
inside the coffin." After a while he added, "Roll down the pants legs, and stuff the calves in." Finally he knocked at their door and said to Li Lan, "Come take a last look. We're about to close the coffin."

Trembling, Li Lan stood up; trembling, she opened the door; trembling, she walked out. With unimaginable difficulty she approached the coffin, where she saw her husbands broken calves placed atop his thighs, as if they were someone else's. She teetered a few times but didn't collapse. She didn't see Song Fanping's shattered knees, since they had already placed his calves in his pants legs, but she saw the broken shards of bone and the bits of flesh that had stuck to the sides of the coffin. Li Lan grasped the coffin with both hands and looked with infinite longing at Song Fanping. Despite his contorted visage, she could still make out his former liveliness, his smile, and recall the way in which he would turn around and wave. Now he walked alone along an empty road, in a landscape devoid of mortals—the love of Li Lan's life was rushing down to the netherworld.

From where they were sitting on the bed, Baldy Li and Song Gang could hear Li Lan's voice tremble as she said, "You can close it now."

CHAPTER 20

B
ALDY LI
and Song Gang never understood how Li Lan managed to be so strong, from the time she emerged from the longdistance bus depot and saw Baldy Li and Song Gang wailing, to when she knelt on the ground gathering up the blood-soaked earth, to witnessing Song Fanpings battered corpse, to buying a thin-planked coffin, to letting the four men from the coffin shop smash up Song Fanpings knees. Through all that she never once cried out loud. As they listened to Song Fanpings legs being smashed, several times Baldy Li and Song Gang opened their mouths and were about to cry out, but then they remembered Li Lan had told them that they shouldn't cry and promptly shut them again.

That night Li Lan prepared a tofu dinner, as was the custom of Liu Town. She cooked a giant pot of tofu and placed it in the center of the table, along with a bowl of greens. As night fell they lit their lamp and the three of them sat at the table, with Song Fanpings coffin just to the side. On top of his coffin was a small kerosene lamp, meant to illuminate Song Fanpings way to the netherworld.

Li Lan did not say a single word the entire afternoon. Baldy Li and Song Gang also didn't dare speak, so the house remained ghostly and silent. Only when Li Lan started to cook did the children hear some clattering and see the steam rising from the pot. This was the first time Li Lan had cooked at home since returning from Shanghai. Her tears streamed down as she stood in front of the kerosene stove, but not once did she raise her hand to wipe them away. As she placed the giant bowls of tofu and greens on the table Baldy Li and Song Gang saw that her tears were still gushing forth, and she continued weeping as she filled their bowls with rice. Then she turned to get the chopsticks with a dreamlike expression on her face. Weeping, she sat on the bench and stared down in confusion at the sticks in her hands. Song Gang whispered, "Those are the chopsticks of the ancients."

Through her tears she looked at the boys, and they told her the story of the chopsticks. At last she raised her hand, wiped the tears from her face, and then handed Baldy Li and Song Gang the chopsticks of the
ancients. Softly she said, "These chopsticks of the ancients are wonderful."

When she said this, she turned and smiled slightly at the coffin. Her smile was as warm and familiar as if Song Fanping had been sitting right there watching her. Then she took up her rice bowl and her tears flowed anew. Sobbing, she ate soundlessly. Baldy Li saw that Song Gangs tears were also flowing into his rice bowl, and so he couldn't help crying, too. The three of them wept and ate in silence.

The morning after their tofu dinner, Li Lan solemnly washed her face and combed her hair. After she had tidied herself up, she took Baldy Li and Song Gangs hands and walked proudly outside. She led the two children through the streets awash in Cultural Revolution flags and slogans, walking as though they were alone on the street. She ignored all the people pointing at her. First she went to the fabric store, and while everyone else was buying red cloth to make flags and armbands, Li Lan instead purchased some black sash and white cloth. The clerks regarded her with curiosity. Someone recognized her as Song Fanping's wife and walked up to her, fists raised, shouting, "Down with counterrevolutionaries!" With equanimity she paid with her last bit of cash, rolled up the sash and cloth, and walked out of the store hugging the fabric close to her chest.

Grasping on to Li Lan s shirt, Baldy Li and Song Gang followed her into the photography studio. As she received the photograph her hands would not stop trembling; she hugged the photograph close to her chest, along with the black sash and white cloth, and continued her proud journey down the main street. At that moment she had forgotten that Baldy Li and Song Gang were following. Her head was filled with images of Song Fanping, instructing the photographer on how to position the lights and when to press the shutter, and all four of them happily walking out of the studio toward the bus depot. It was at the depot that she last waved goodbye to Song Fanping, and this was the final image she had of him. By the time she had returned from Shanghai, Song Fanping was no longer.

Li Lan pressed on, resisting the urge to take the family portrait out of the envelope she held in her trembling hands. She forced herself to walk proudly until she reached the bridge, where the parading masses blocked her way. She, of course, didn't know that Song Fanping had once stood here, gloriously waving a giant red flag, but once she
stopped, she could not control herself any longer and removed the photograph. The first thing she noticed was Song Fanpings open smile, and before she could make out the other three smiling faces, she had collapsed. For three days she had borne this horrible tragedy with dignity and reserve, but now Song Fanpings smile in the photograph completely undid her.

Baldy Li and Song Gang were still holding on to her shirttails when suddenly she disappeared. Standing before them was a man with an astonished expression. The boys then noticed that Li Lan had fallen to the ground, and they cried as they squatted, nudging her. She, however, merely lay there with her eyes closed, unresponsive. Baldy Li and Song Gang burst out in terrified wails as more and more people gathered around. The two boys knelt beside Li Lan, believing that they were now all alone in this world. Weeping, they begged the bystanders to save their mother, not realizing that she had merely fainted. They sobbed as they asked, "Why has Mama fallen down?"

Everyone was talking at the same time, then one suggested, "Flip up her eyelids. Are her pupils dilated?"

Baldy Li and Song Gang rushed to flip open her eyelids. They looked at her eyes but didn't know exactly which were her pupils. Looking up, they answered, "They're very large."

This man said, "If her pupils are dilated, she's probably dead."

When the boys heard this, they clutched each other and cried even louder. Another man bent down, saying, "Stop crying, stop crying. You kids don't even know what pupils are. Feel for her pulse. If you can feel her pulse, then you know she isn't dead."

Baldy Li and Song Gang immediately stopped crying and asked anxiously, "Where do we find her pulse?"

The man extended his left hand and used his right to point it out, "Right here, on the wrist."

Baldy Li and Song Gang each grabbed one of Li Lan's hands and started feeling her wrists. The man asked them, "Do you feel anything?"

Baldy Li shook his head. "Nothing."

Baldy Li looked nervously at Song Gang, who also shook his head. "Nothing."

The man stood back up, concluding, "Then she probably is dead."

Baldy Li and Song Gang now felt that they had lost all hope. They
opened their mouths and wailed. After a while they paused, then burst out again. Song Gang sobbed, "Papas dead. Now Mamas dead, too."

At that point, Blacksmith Tong appeared on the scene. He squeezed in through the crowd and squatted down, shaking the two boys and telling them to stop their crying. He said, "What dilated pupils or beating pulse? That's for the doctor to decide. You kids don't know a thing. Listen to me: Put your ear against her chest—do you hear thumping inside?"

Song Gang wiped away his snot and placed his head against Li Lan s chest. After listening for a while, he raised his head and nervously said to Baldy Li, "I think I hear thumping."

Baldy Li also hurriedly wiped away his tears and snot and listened for a while. He also heard her heart beating. He nodded to Song Gang, "I hear it, too."

Blacksmith Tong stood up and scolded the two men who had spoken earlier, "You two don't know crap. You only know how to frighten children."

Then Blacksmith Tong told Baldy Li and Song Gang, "She's not dead. She just fainted. Why don't you let her lie there for a while? She'll come to eventually."

Baldy Li and Song Gang immediately broke into wide grins. Wiping at his tears, Song Gang raised his face to Blacksmith Tong and said, "Blacksmith Tong, you will be rewarded in the next life."

Blacksmith Tong was very pleased with Song Gang's words. He smiled. "Now, that's true."

Baldy Li and Song Gang sat quietly by Li Lan's side. Song Gang picked up the photograph that had fallen to the ground, took a look for himself, and then showed it to Baldy Li before carefully placing it back into the envelope. More and more people gathered on the bridge, and many of them squeezed over to take a look at the boys. After inquiring about them from others, they then squeezed out of the crowd again. The two boys sat there patiently. From time to time they stole a look at each other and smiled. After a very long time had passed, Li Lan finally got up. The boys were so happy they shouted to the bystanders, "Mama's woken up!"

Li Lan had no idea what had just happened, only that she was crawling up from the ground. Embarrassed, she carefully dusted herself off and once again gathered the photograph and the black sash and white cloth to her chest. She didn't say a word the entire way home. Baldy Li
and Song Gang didn't dare to say anything either, but they were bursting with emotion. They held on tightly to Li Lans clothes—having regained their mother after believing that they had lost her, they were filled with happiness. From time to time they would crane their necks to look at Li Lans front, at her back, and exchange tiny smiles.

CHAPTER 21

T
HE FOURTH DAY AFTER
Song Fanpings death, an elderly peasant pulling an old, battered cart arrived at Li Lan s front door. Standing outside the door, his shirt and pants covered in patches, the old man didn't say a word, and merely wept as he looked in at the coffin. He was Song Fanpings father, Song Gangs grandfather. He had once owned a few hundred
mu
of farmland, but after Liberation it had all been redistributed to the other peasants in the village. This old landlord—who was now poorer than the poorest "poor peasant" and no longer owned anything other than his landlord status—had come to take his landlord son home.