Broken Glass (27 page)

“What. Was. That
?” Henry asked, walking towards me. I dropped to the floor and just sat there, not telling him what had just happened.

Because in truth, I myself didn’t know.

I had endless nightmares for the next week and a half. Maybe it was because Conner had stopped coming to see me. I woke up every night, screaming and crying uncontrollably. I saw Tyson dying, over and over, followed by an image
of Conner walking away from me.
I couldn’t reach either one of them. I tried to save Tyson and I tried to run after Conner, but both were useless actions because I was stuck. I couldn’t do anything and I was alone. I was so, so alone.

Julianne noticed a sickly change in me over
just a couple days, before she was to take her Christmas vacation
and I could tell it frustrated her when she couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. She had the nurse lighten the dosage on my meds, in hope of bringing up my spirits. It didn’t do any good.

The Christmas holiday came and went. A few patients went home, a few had visitors, and obviously the Ward
staff was
able to enjoy it. Julianne was only around two days out of that week, which still surprised me. If I had been in her shoes, I would have taken as much time as I could with my family, especially since her husband was so sick. But maybe being at work served as an escape from the devastation of what was happening in her home.

Two days before the New Year’s Eve party, I was sitting quietly in my room
when Henry ba
rged in. I looked up, startled.

“What is it?” I asked.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he demanded, and I was surprised at his demeanor. He was seriously upset.

“What do you mean?” I asked, but I could clearly see there was no point in trying to play dumb with him.

“Ava, I love you dearly with all of my heart,” he said. “And I know we all have our good days and bad days in this place. But you’re all out of sorts and I have no idea why. I didn’t want to ask you about it in front of Shakespeare because I know you like to try to be tough in front of him…so spill your guts! What’s up?”

“I’m having nightmares,” I came right out and told him. “I wake up screaming and sweaty every night. I can’t sleep, I feel sick if I eat. And it’s not just about Tyson anymore.” I didn’t have to say Conner’s name. Henry knew.

“He doesn’t come around anymore,” I said quietly, letting my head drop slightly. “I didn’t realize I could become so close to someone
again, in a matter of a couple of months.
I didn’t think I would actually be sick from the lack of being around him. I should’ve never let him in like I did.”

“Have a little faith in him, Ava,” Henry said, sitting down on the floor facing me. “
The Christmas holidays just ended, he was probably home with his family.
He’s not gonna leave you.”

“Leave me?” I chuckled grimly. “He’s not
with
me, how could he leave me?”

“The
New Year’s Eve
party is in two days,” Henry said then, and I was really surprised in the sudden change in subject. “Aren’t you excited about getting all dolled up? Oh, and Channing is going.”

“Really?” I replied, and a smile touched my lips for the first time in several days.

“You’ve got to let me help you get all dolled up,” Henry grinned. “Promise you’ll let me make you over, Miss Darton?”

“Of course!” I smiled again. “It’s going to be fun. Not to mention the decorations are phenomenal.”

“Nothing short of amazing,” Henry added. He stood up then. “C’mon. Let’s go play poker in Shakespeare’s room.”

20
.

December 31
st
arrived and the party would begin at 7:30 that evening. Julianne came by my room with the dress Channing had left for me
—
and surprisingly, Channing herself.

“Hey!” I smiled, hugging Channing immediately as she entered the room. Julia
nne was grinning as she put
the dress on my bed.

“I’m looking forward to seeing you all dressed up, Ava,” she said, and left.

“Henry tells me you’ve been acting odd lately,” Channing said, as soon as Julianne was out of the room. I rolled my eyes.

“Oh, he’s a little gossiper, isn’
t he?” was my reply. “
I’m fine now that you’re here. We’re going to have a good time tonight.”

“I’m glad you’re looking forward to it,” she smiled. “Oo
o
, wait
‘
til you see my dress! It’s really pretty. My mom bought it for me last weekend. I was surprised she even supported me coming out here to this. I was such an embarrassment to her when I was admitted here, after all.”

“Maybe she sees what good it did you,” I suggested. “Now, let’s see that dress!”

Channing had brought a duffel bag in with her and now set it on the floor, unzipping it. She pulled out a bundle of baby blue fabric, not quite as poofy as the pink dress she’d loaned me.

“Oh, it’s beautiful,” I breathed, as she held it out for me to see. It was strapless, floor-length, solid baby blue. Very simple, very classic.

“Henry was comparing this to prom,” I told her, smiling slightly. “It really is. Did you go to prom?”

“No,” Channing sat down on my bed. “I was very quiet in high school, very shy. I got all flustered if a boy ever so much as looked at me. I didn’t like any attention whatsoever.”

“You don’t seem so shy now,” I replied. “What changed?”

“Oh, I just got sent to a nuthouse,” she chuckled. “That’s enough attention to bring anyone out of their shell, I guess.”

“I guess.”

“Let’s say, hypothetically, this
was
prom,” Channing said then. “Who would you want to be your date? Out of every guy here, I mean.”

“Slim pickings,” I joked. “Hmmm. Probably Henry.”

“Oh, you can’t choose Henry!” Channing exclaimed. “He’s gay!”

“So?” I smiled. “It’s about who you have fun with. You don’t have to marry your prom date. But if I couldn’t go with Henry, probably Shakespeare, I guess.”

“Yeah, he’d probably be the first one to ask you,” Channing nodded.
I raised my right eyebrow
as
I sat down on the bed next to her.

“Who would you go with?” I asked. She thought for a moment.

“Conner Walker,” she said, finally, causing my stomach to turn a sudden flip.

“Why?” I asked her.

“He’s nice, easy on the eyes,” she replied. “Plus, he’s British, which means he’s got manners and knows how to dance
like Mr. Darcy
, right?”

I laughed
at the
Pride and Prejudice
reference
.

“Maybe,” was all I said. Just hearing his name said out loud was enough to make me feel sick all over again.

“I bet he’ll be there tonight,” Channing said. I just shrugged. She had no idea what had happened
a week prior a
nd I didn’t intend on telling her.

“Well, we have two hours to get all dolled up!” She abruptly changed the subject, as if she knew something was wrong. “I’ll go get Henry so he can help us do our make-up.”

“Make-
up?” I questioned.

“Oh yeah,” she pulled more stuff out of her bag. “With Julianne’s permission, we are going to be super sexy tonight!! Eyeliner, lipstick, blush…we’re going all out, Miss Ava!” I couldn’t help but smile at the thought.

Surprisingly, it did take us almost all of the two hours to get dressed and ready. This most likely had something to do with the fact that Henry liked to dance around and take his time while applying make-up.

“Henry,” I said at one point, as he gently smo
othed glittery white
eye shadow
over my eyelids.

“Yes?” he asked.

“You’re definitely
a better make-up artist
than I ever gave you credit for,” I told him.

“Oh, Ava,”
he laughed hard
. “You are a funny one.”

“Hey, Channing?” I said, abruptly, glancing over at her. She was standing by the chest on the other side of the room, running a brush through her long dark hair.

“Don’t move!” Henry hissed, raising the
eye shadow
applicator
from my eyelid.

“Sorry,” I giggled and he got back to work.

“Yeah?” she answered.

“Did you see Aurelia when you came up here last time?” I asked. She hesitated before replying.

“Um, yeah,” she paused brushing. “I did.”

“What’s up with her?” I asked. “I haven’t so much as seen her anywhere, except in group therapy lately. And even then, she doesn’t say a word.”

“I dunno,” Channing said. “She’s on too much medicine, I think. Who knows with Aurelia, though, right?” She gave a light laugh and I knew she was lying. But I didn’t push the issue any further.

At 7:00, Channing and I went to the bathroom to change into our dresses. There, we’d be able to see what Henry had done to our faces in the mirrors. I slipped the dress on and was surprised at how perfectly it fit. I went to stand in front of one of the mirrors and lost my breath.

I had barely looked at myself since entering Craneville and I didn’t recognize the girl that stared back at me. My light hair was so long, flowing down my back gratefully, free from the ponytail I’d kept it in every day since I’d been here. Henry had done wonders with the make-up. I actually had color in my cheeks and the
eye shadow
and mascara made my blue eyes pop. Not to mention, despite my dramatic weight loss from being in Craneville, this dress actually made me looks as though I still had my feminine curves. I wanted to burst into tears at the sight of a
girl
who looked almost normal.

“Oh, Ava,” Channing said, walking over to me in her own blue dress.

“You look so great,” I turned to her, smiling widely, tears welling up in my eyes.

“Look at you!” she reached out and lightly touched my hair. “You’re gorgeous!”

“Except for these slippers,” I pulled up my dress to show her my bedroom slippers. She laughed.

“Sorry I didn’t have any shoes to let you borrow,” she apologized. “You’ve got pretty big feet.” I laughed and it came out sounding more like a choked cry.

“Ava, why are you crying?” she asked suddenly. I held my head back so tears wouldn’t spill down my cheeks and mess up Henry’s beautiful make-up job.

“I’m not,” I told her, finally letting my head back down to look at her. “It’s just…I know this might not make sense to you, but, for the first time in a long time, I feel like I am…
alive
.”

She smiled.

“That makes perfect sense to me,” she said, softly.

We walked down the hall towards my room and Henry and Shakespeare stood there, both also in bedroom slippers. They both just stared at us.

“Gorgeous women!” Henry exclaimed. “I think I might’ve just turned straight!” Channing and I both laughed. I looked over at Shakespeare who was staring at me.

“I don’t even recognize you, Ava,” he murmured, putting his arms around me and giving me a quick hug. “You look so beautiful.”

I blushed.

“Thanks, Shakespeare,” I replied, then admiring his tux. “You don’t look so shabby yourself.” He grinned.

“Yeah, me and Henry are
styling and profiling
it up tonight,” he told me. I looked over at Henry then. He was too skinny for his tux, but he still looked like a million bucks. There was a glow about all four of us, as if for this one night, we were
okay
—
free of all tragedy.

“Say, has anyone seen Aurelia?” Henry asked us then. None of us had.

“She’s probably already in the activities room,” Shakespeare said. “I think it’s after 7:30.”

“Shall we?” Henry smiled then, offering his arm to Channing. She took it with a wide grin.

“Let’s go,” she replied.

“C’mon, Shake,” I was smiling too, as I linked my arm in his. “Let’s dance the night away.”

“Wow, you guys did great on the decorations,” Shakespeare commented, as we entered the activities room. Henry and I had done a good job with the streamers, balloons, and banners, but someone else had
come in to totally transform
where we ate every day. The room was dark, lit only by colorful party lights that had been put up on the corners of the walls. Four disco balls also hung from the ceiling, causing magical flashes of light to glitter throughout the room. It really was just like prom.