Broken Dreams (Franklin Blues #2) (5 page)

She locks eyes with me for a few seconds then looks away. I can tell she’s nervous because she’s twirling her hair around her fingers. She only ever does it if she’s unsure or nervous about something.

“I know this might be kind of sudden and way too early in our…whatever this is, but I need to know if you want kids someday. When you see yourself in the next five years, say, do you see yourself married with kids?”

She’s still not looking at me, but I don’t need her to right now because I’m trying to think of how to word this so I don’t scare her off.

“In five years, I’d like to think I’m married with maybe one or two kids. I eventually want what Shawn and Hailee have. Why do you ask?”

She sits up and I can see the tears swimming in her eyes. It’s starting to make me nervous because I can’t tell what she’s thinking. I might be good at reading people since it is part of my job description, but I have never been able to get a good read on her.

“Lance, I know I’ve never told you, but I was married once. It seems like so long ago, but in reality, the divorce was only finalized three years ago. What I’m trying to say is, I’m not sure I can have kids. Jeremy and I tried for years to get pregnant, but nothing ever happened. We tried IVF, but it only took once and I ended up miscarrying after only about two and a half months. What I’m trying to say is that if you want kids, maybe we should break this off now, because as it stands right now, I can’t give them to you.”

The tears are falling down her cheeks like rain now and it breaks my heart to see her so upset. To know she was married is one thing, but knowing she suffered that big of a loss guts me.

“Now you listen here. First, there isn’t a ‘whatever this is’ thing going on, you are my girl, and that’s that. Now, onto this second order of business, you are still young, I think I remember once you saying you were only 27, so there is plenty of time for babies. Let’s take this one day at a time and see where this goes with us. Is that good for you? When the time is right, we’ll have plenty of fun practicing baby making. Now kiss me.”

She leans forward, and right about the time our lips touch, the stairs squeak. We both look up to see Hailee and she’s got the biggest smile on her face.

“Well it’s about damn time. You guys were doing the same old song and dance, I was about to lock you two away until you got your heads out of you asses. I wasn’t sure how much longer I could watch you two before I had to intervene.”

I look over to Amy who is red from her cheeks to her hairline. It’s so cute that even underneath that tough exterior that she’s still human, and that little things like being caught almost making out can make her blush.

“Yeah, Baby Girl, I’d have to say it’s about damn time. I never thought I’d get the chance and I’m sure as hell not going to waste it.” I look over to Amy and wink. She’s turning bright red again and damn, my dick is twitching at the mere sight of it.

Shawn walks in the house, closely followed by Jax, his K-9 partner, who heads straight for the swing. I hope like hell he doesn’t wake up Lil’ Bit because it took us awhile to get her to sleep. After he gets hit in the nose a few times he gives up and goes to lay in the kitchen.

“So Lance, Amy, what do I owe the pleasure of seeing the two of you today. Not that I mind in the least, but we’ve hardly seen you since the baby was born.”

He looks at all three of us, like he knows something is up. I start to talk but Amy cuts me off, “We missed you guys, that’s all. I’ve been cooped up in Lance’s house for weeks now taking care of his injured ass, and I really wanted to see my best friend and niece. Is that a crime officer?”

Oh no, she’s getting irritated and defensive, a clear sign she’s lying. Shawn may not know that, but I sure as hell do. Shawn looks like he doesn’t buy a thing coming out of Amy’s mouth and I don’t blame him. I need to think of something quick. “Actually, we came to tell you the good news. We’re together now brother. We wanted you both to be the first to know that we have seen the light, and how much we were made for each other, so we are giving it a go. We wanted to celebrate with you guys so we came over.”

He’s looking at me like he’s not sure if he buys it, but nods his head and extends his hand out for me to shake. When I stand, he grabs it and pulls me in for one of our manly hugs.

“Alright, that is cause for celebration. Now, I’m going to go all ‘big brother’ and tell you if you hurt her, then you’ll have me to deal with, best friend or not,” he says holding my hand a little too tight and it’s actually starting to hurt.

“Dude, I get it. Honestly, I’m not going anywhere. I have wanted her since I arrested her, you both know this. There hasn’t been anyone else since she walked, or rather drunkenly stumbled, into my life.” I say that last part quietly so she doesn’t hear me; I don’t want to scare her off. I look over to make sure she didn’t hear me and her back is turned to me as she grabs for the baby.

“Alright, Lance and I are going to start the grill. I’m going to call Mason and see if he’s off shift so he can come join us too. He needs to get out, the last time I saw him he looked like a zombie. He’s going to work himself to death,” Shawn announces.

Hailee and Amy look over at us and nod their heads. Amy is holding a still sleeping Scarlett, and I can’t help that my mind drifts to her holding our baby one day. She says she’s not sure if she can carry a child, but I don’t care about any of that. We’ll do whatever we have to do to ensure that we have our own kids. If she thinks she can scare me away that easily she’s got another thing coming.

Shawn and I walk outside, and I pull my cell out to call Mason while he starts the grill. It rings twice before he picks up.

“Hello? I just got off a 48 hour shift, what’s up,” he says when he answers. I can tell I’ve woken him up but I don’t really care.

“Mase, man, you need to quit working so much. You’re going to die of exhaustion, but that’s not why I called. Get over to Shawn and Hailee’s, we are having a cook out to celebrate my new relationship with Amy and we want you here.”

I hear the bed squeak so I’m assuming he’s getting up.

“Yeah, congrats dude. Give me about an hour and I’ll be there. I’m going to stop by the liquor store and get some Jack and beer, you guys need anything?” I look over to Shawn and ask him if we need anything from the liquor store, he shakes his head no.

“Nah man, we’re good. Now get your ass here.” I hang up the call and stick my phone back in my pocket. I look over at Shawn and he’s smiling at me.

“You got laid didn’t you? That’s why you’re in such a good mood. You and Amy didn’t decide to give things a go; you fucked her and made her see things your way. I’ve known her awhile now, and there’s no way she just
decided
she wanted a relationship with you.”

I sit and think about it for a minute. I am going to need to choose my words wisely here. “Yes, we had sex. It was fucking amazing. She’s a spitfire in and out of bed. I’ve never had such amazing sex before her. I’m not going into all the details because she is like a sister to you, but I will say this, I’m going to fight like hell to keep her mine.”

Shawn nods his head, he knows how I’m feeling, it wasn’t too long ago he was telling me the same thing about Hailee. They went through some bad shit, but have come out on the other side, stronger than ever and now they’re married and have a beautiful baby girl. I want what they have, and I know that I can have that with Amy if she would let her guard down and let me in.

I hear the door behind me open and turn around to see Mason walking through it with a half-gallon of Jack and two-24 cases of Budweiser.

“Damn bro, you supplying liquor to an army? That’s a fuck ton of alcohol dude.”

He shrugs his shoulders and goes to grab the cooler that we keep out back. He puts the beer and Jack in the cooler and walks back into the house. He comes back out with a big bag of ice and dumps it into the cooler. “I figured we would all need it, well at least I do. I’ll drink the whole bottle of Jack by myself if need be. I need to stop feeling for a bit.”

Shawn and I look at each other. We aren’t sure what’s going on, but if I know Shawn, and I do, he’ll get to the bottom of it.

Amy

After getting my baby fix, compliments of my beautiful niece, I head outside to find my man.
My man,
I am still getting used to saying that. It has been a long time since I have used those words in a sentence, since I found my ever so loving husband in bed with my, at the time, best friend. I still feel myself getting nervous that I’m going to fuck up this whole relationship, but I know that if I don’t see this thing through I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.

I get out to the back porch and see my man with a beer in his hand, laughing at something Shawn has said. It’s like he can feel my eyes on him because he looks up and our eyes meet. I’ve never had a man look at me with such passion before. The way he looks at me, I can tell he’s undressing me with his eyes, and normally I would do something sexy to make sure the man knew I was feeling the same thing, but not with Lance. There are no preconceived notion of sexual promises, what I have with him is real, and if he’s willing, he will see all of my darkness. I pray to God that he can be my light.

He gets up from where he’s sitting and walks over to stand right in front of me. He towers over me by at least seven inches or so, therefore I have to look up to look into his eyes. He has this look on his face that I can’t read, but it terrifies me.

“Hey Sexy, ‘bout time you got your ass out here to be with me,” he says and his voice breaks me out of my trance and I give him a small smile. He takes me by the hand and leads me over to the two seater porch swing. He sits down and pulls me onto his lap. I freeze momentarily, but eventually relax in his hold.

I can feel his breath on my neck as he talks to the boys, but I’m not hearing a word he says. I have goosebumps from the desire pooling in my stomach. He knows what he’s doing to me, and it’s irritating, but it’s sexy as hell too. He knows what it takes to turn me on and we’ve only had sex the one time. No man has ever been able to turn me on with the flip of a switch.

The boys get dinner made, or I should say Shawn gets dinner made, and we all sit down to dinner. I’m in shock that Mason brings the half gallon of Jack with him to the table. He keeps refilling his red Solo cup after downing the previous refill in about two swallows. I’ve never seen him drink this way, he’s usually the quiet one of the group, and I’ve never seen him drink more than two beers.

“Mase, Hunny, don’t you think you should slow down there? You’ve already drank about a quarter of that bottle. You need to pace yourself. What’s wrong,” Hailee asks him.

Hailee, bless her heart, is saying what we are all thinking and gets a death glare from Mason. I’ve never seen him act like this and it worries me. Hailee starts to cower into Shawn’s side, and he wraps his arm around her, whispering something in her ear. She nods slightly and gets up to go check on the baby.

That girl has been through hell and back. She survived being abused by her ex-husband, stalked by said ex’s best friend, kidnapped, raped, and she came out on the other side not completely fucked up. God knows I would’ve been. I hear Shawn talking to Mason and it pulls me out of my memories from the last year. “Mason, dude, what the fuck was that look for? You know she was only trying to help, and you of all people know what she’s been through, so why would you give her that look knowing you would scare the shit outta her,” Shawn fumes and I can’t say I blame him, I am pissed myself.

“Dude, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get pissed like that. It’s…I’ve been going through some stuff and she reminded me of something Melanie would’ve said.”

Whoa, wait. Hold the phone, who’s Melanie? From the looks on Shawn and Lance’s faces they don’t have a clue either.

“Um, Mase, who is Melanie? None of us have ever heard of her,” I ask, deciding that it should be me who asks him. As soon as the words leave my mouth I hear Hailee coming back from inside.

“What did I miss? I fed Scarlett, changed her, and rocked her to sleep. We should be good for at least four hours now.”

I decide not to let Mason off the hook so I answer her question. “Oh nothing yet, Mason here was about to explain who Melanie is.” She gives me a look that screams ‘what the fuck’. I nod my head and look over at Mason. “You were saying Mase?”

“Uh, yeah, right, as I was saying, Melanie was the girl I dated all through high school. She was the love of my life. She told me the night of our graduation bon fire that she was pregnant. I was 18 years old, and I was scared. I was planning on proposing to her anyways later that summer, so I pulled the ring out and proposed right then and there in my bedroom. My parents were thrilled. They had always thought of her as a daughter anyways, but there was something in her eyes that told me she was terrified. I asked if we were moving too fast, she told me no, that she was so excited to be my wife but she had to go tell her parents. I tried to go with her; I always knew that her home life was less than ideal. I never thought her parents were physically abusive, because, let’s face it, I got her pregnant, and I had never seen any bruises on her body. Her self-esteem was so low when we first started dating, but she had bloomed into a confident woman. Anyways, she told me she was going to tell her parents and pack an overnight bag to stay with me since we decided to go to the bon fire anyways. I tried calling her all night after she never showed up, and fell asleep with my phone in hand. I woke up the next morning with the ring and a note that she was leaving me. I jumped out of bed ran through the house and out the front door. I saw her parent’s car pulling out of the driveway so I ran after it. She was watching me the whole time with tears in her eyes. Not once did she try and get her dad to pull over. That was the last time I saw her and that was nearly ten years ago. I don’t even know if she had my baby or not.”

He hangs his head and shakes it a few times. He lifts up the bottle of Jack and downs a good portion of it in about three gulps.