Read Brian Friel Plays 2 Online
Authors: Brian Friel
Angela
Give me a kiss, George. (
She kisses him
.) You should be wearing a toga and playing a lyre and gorging yourself with black grapes. (
She picks up a wreath of dried
seaweed and places it on his head
.) There! Dionysus!
Trish
I have a suggestion, Terry: let’s have the party here.
Frank
(
holding up a fragment of the lifebelt
) Anybody drowning?
Terry
We have a boat coming for us, Trish.
Trish
We don’t have to take it, do we?
Terry
Yes, we do.
Trish
Why?
Frank
Because it’s all arranged.
Trish
Berna, what do you say?
Berna
I don’t care. Here’s fine. Here’s wonderful.
Trish
Angela?
Angela
I know another happy song!
Frank
(
icily
) Angela, we’re all trying to –
Terry
(
sings
) ‘Here we are again –’
Angela
That’s it!
George
picks
up
the
melody.
(
sings
) ‘Happy as can be –’
Trish
I know that!
Trish, Terry and Angela
(
sing together
) ‘All good pals and jolly good company.’
Angela
now
continues
alone.
She
hoists
up
her
skirts
and
does
a
parodic
dance
up
and
down
the
pier
as
she
sings.
Terry
and
Trish
clap
hands.
Angela’s
performance
is
full
and
exuberant
but
at
the
same
time
there
is
a
hint
of
underlying
panic.
Angela
(
singing and dancing
)
‘A kiss for Bernadette,
My darling sister, B.
I think I need a very strong cup of tea.’
Frank
(
icily
) Not at all! You’re wonderful!
Angela
‘I may be slightly drunk
As teachers oughtn’t be.
But Frank, my husband,
Tra-la-la-la-la-la-lee –’
Oh God … (
She flops on to a bollard
.)
Frank
Thank you very much. Now – what about this boat, Terry?
Trish
I vote we stay here. Berna?
Frank
Terry’s day, Trish.
Trish
Aren’t we all happy enough here?
Angela
(
sings to same
air
) ‘Today is Terry’s day –’
Frank
(
to Terry
) What do you say?
Terry
You think this is great? Believe me, my children, you ain’t seen nuthin’ yet.
Angela
One final happy song –
Frank
For Christ’s sake!
Angela
And despite my husband’s encouragement the last happy song I’ll sing.
Trish
Yes, Angela, sing! Let’s have a song!
Angela
And this last happy song is for our host, Terry Martin –
Trish
My wonderful brother.
Frank
Mister Terence Martin!
Terry
Terence Mary Martin.
Angela
Concert promoter.
Terry
She means showman.
Angela
Turf accountant.
Frank
Yeah!
Terry
She means bookie.
Angela
Gambler.
Terry
She means eejit.
Angela
And a man of infinite generosity and kindness.
Overlapping
voices:
George
Yes!
Frank
Hear, hear!
Angela
Yeah–yeah–yeah!
Trish
Perfectly true!
Frank
Yes!
Terry
(
embarrassed
) That sho’ is me, folks.
Angela
(
raising a bottle
) To Terence Mary.
Trish
To Terry and Berna.
Angela
Friend, brother-in-law, most generous of –
George plays another ‘Amen’ chord that drowns out the
rest
of
her
speech.
Behave yourself, you!
Terry
Wait–wait–wait–wait–wait. Give me a hand here, Frank.
Terry
throws
open
a
hamper
and
produces
bottles.
Frank
We’re not having the party here, are we?
Angela
I want to sing another cheap song.
Terry
There are more cups in that bag.
Angela
You sing, Berna!
Berna
Later, maybe.
Trish
It’s not champagne, is it?
Terry
That’s what the man sold me.
Angela
George! A cheap song!
George
We’ll drink first.
Trish
Oh God, Terry!
Frank
Anybody need a cup?
Trish
A bit mad this, isn’t it? What time of day is it? (
to
Berna
) Maybe we’re all mad, are we?
Berna
Maybe.
Frank
May concerts and gambling and bookmaking always prosper.
Trish
Oh, God, Terry, something wrong with this, isn’t there?
Terry
Why?
Angela
(
sings
) ‘Oh, Terry Martin, what can I do?’
Terry
(
sings
) ‘I took a bus to Ballybeg and I found myself with you.’ Berna? (
Drink
.)
Berna
Up to the top, please.
Terry
(
softly
) You OK?
Berna
(
loudly
) That’s not the top.
Terry
Shouldn’t you go easy on –?
Berna
That’s sufficient, thank you.
Angela
(
to Frank
) Both up to the brim, please. (
Cups
.)
Frank
You’ll get your share.
Angela
Jesus, how I love a prodigal man! To cheap songs!
Terry
George? (
Drink
.)
George
Please.
Trish
Just a little, Terry.
But
George
tilts
the
bottle
and
fills
his
cup
to
overflowing.
George
Lovely. Thanks.
Terry
Good idea this, isn’t it?
Trish
We’re blessed in the weather. He’s (
George
) looking well, isn’t he?
Terry
Great. To the old band, George.
George
The Dude Ranchers.
Terry
The Dude Ranchers. The best band ever to tour Ireland. How many years were we on the road?
Trish
Twenty-one.
Terry
Were we?
George
A lifetime.
Trish
A lifetime, he says.
George
And we’ll do it again.
Trish
You were told not to speak.
Terry
Yes, we’ll do it again! And this time we’ll tour the world!
George
smiles,
spreads
his
hands
and
moves
away.
Berna
I’ll have some more champagne, Frank.
Frank
On the way.
Angela
(
to Berna
) Shouldn’t you go easy on that, love?
Frank
Don’t spare it. Loads more in that hamper.
Berna
Thank you, Frank.
Trish
and
Terry
are
alone.
Terry
How is he? (
George
)
Trish
He plays all day long. As if he were afraid to stop.
Terry
He’s looking great.
Trish
You’ve got to stop sending that huge cheque every week, Terry.
Terry
Nothing. It’s –
Trish
We can manage fine.
Terry
It’s only –
Trish
We don’t need it. Honestly.
Terry
How was the check-up last week?
Trish
Three months at most.
Terry
Oh Christ. Does he know?
Trish
He’s very brave about it.
Terry
Is there anything –?
Trish
(
aloud
) Quiet, please! The brother is going to make a speech!
Terry
The brother is –!
Frank
Speech! Silence! Speech!
Terry
The brother is going to do nothing –
Frank
Glasses all full?
Overlapping
talk:
Any more champagne?
Trish
Listen to the brother.
Angela
Good man, Terry.
Trish
Go ahead.
Frank
Please! Quiet!
Trish
And make it short, Terry.
Angela
Terence Mary Martin!
Frank
But first – first – may I say something? To Terry, for whom we all have the utmost respect and affection; and to his lovely Berna; both of whom have made all our lives –
Angela
(
quickly, lightly
) Happy birthday.
Frank
A very happy –
And
the
rest
is
drowned
by
George
playing
‘Happy
Birthday
to
You’.
And
everybody
joins
in
the
singing.
Terry
covers
his
face
in
exaggerated
but
genuine
embarrassment
and
pretends
to
hide
behind
the
lifebelt
stand
while
they
sing
to
him.
When
the
chorus
ends
he
sings
the
first
two
lines
of
the
refrain
of
‘I’m
Twenty-
one Today’. General laughter.
Trish
All right, Terry. One very short speech.
Terry
No–no–no–no–no. No speeches. May I have your attention, please? Berna? George?
Frank
Attention, please.
Terry
OK?
They
all
fall
silent.
Terry
points
out
to
sea.
They
line
up
around
him
–
Frank,
Trish,
Berna,
George.
Angela
moves
off
and
stands
alone.
Straight out there. That island. That’s where we’re going.