Breaking Elle (8 page)

“If there’s anything you need, let me know. Being new in town, you probably don’t know many people here in Boston.” I say, trying to make him smile again to see if he will talk. He may be a stranger to me but I hate the hurt, confused look he has on his face.

“Thanks for that.” He smiles, breaking the gloom that blanketed his features a minute ago and shooting me his confident smile that I saw earlier today. “It can get lonely being away from home, so it’s nice to make a few more friends up here.” He pauses, peering over at me thoughtfully. “Well, you better get going. Don’t want to keep Cane waiting.” His voice is somewhat cynical, but I’m not going to dig any deeper.

“Bye,” I say, anxiously twisting my hair.

“G’night, Elle.” He grins, his eyes sparkling as he sits back on the bench, watching me leave.

I turn away, no longer questioning why I came here with him, but actually happy that I did.

She didn’t have to take the walk with me and the fact that she agreed to made my day. It hurt to look at her without being able to touch her. I was trying to be a gentleman, but I couldn’t help myself. I had to force myself to keep my hands in my pockets as much as possible so that I wouldn’t reach out and touch her. But I did. I had to. I know she feels the attraction too by the way she smiled and blushed when I brushed against her arm. It’s not just a physical attraction with her, though. God knows, she’s amazing with that long brown hair, hazel eyes, and those legs that go on forever. I
felt
something more for this girl than I have for any other girl. She had me the second I laid eyes on her. Spending those few minutes alone with her just locked it in for me. I need to know more. I just have to get to know her.

Something in her eyes tells me that she’s struggling with something. I could tell right away. I want to know what’s inside her head, for her to tell me
,
but she has Cane. I didn’t want to be aggressive with her. Damn, how I wish I could be in his shoes. Fucking life has a way of throwing you a curveball. I’m used to getting a lot of those, and I’ve always ended up on top in more ways than one.

I walk back to my apartment that now seems depressingly empty. I thought I had everything: nice truck, friends, kickass crib, wall-size plasma TV, and cable package with virtually every game televised every hour of the day. It’s every guy’s dream, but none of this shit can replace what I felt with Elle today. I don’t get it. I’ve never been one to hold back on anyone, not afraid to make a move on a girl. Tonight she brought out a different Reed, a Reed that I don’t know. I’m not sure how to handle this shit. I wasn’t looking for this. Do I want to be more than just with her? The fucking idea never crossed my mind until I laid eyes on her. Thing is I don’t mess with girls that already have a man. Maybe I should just break this one rule of mine. It’s a fucked up one, now that I think about it.

Tossing the keys on the kitchen counter, I grab the remote and stare at the TV, unsure what to do with myself. I’m not in the mood to do anything but sleep. I attempt to get comfortable on the couch, punching the pillow behind my head and closing my eyes. I need to take a nap but can’t seem to do it. I never can fall asleep when I want to, but it’s really bad now because my mind is in overdrive thinking about my family back home and Tommy calling out of the blue. Now I’ve got her in my head, too.

I have plans to go out tonight and I think that’s what I need to do. Go out, have a couple of beers, watch the Red Sox on TV, and pretend to be a fan like everyone else in Red Sox Nation. It’s fun to watch the intensity and passion they have for their beloved Red Sox. Getting caught up in it is easy, even lost if you really want to.
Lost with her? What the fuck am I doing?
I’m trying to think about fucking baseball, and somehow I think of her. The whole point of this adventure was to get things out of my system without all the drama from back home. What I do here doesn’t hurt anyone back in Texas. I’m doing this for me. I’ve needed this for so long.

I had to grow up fast. I became the protector for my mom that my dad wasn’t for so many years. Alcohol seemed to be all he cared about in his life. Growing up, I never saw him much. He was in and out, coming home dead drunk late at night when I was asleep. He couldn’t keep a job for more than a couple months, so Mom had to work as a nanny, watching other kids while she raised my sister and me. I did my part cleaning out stables, cutting lawns, walking dogs, and just about anything else that I could figure out to do to put food on the table.

They always fought about the money. That didn’t stop him from taking whatever she had to buy his alcohol, and leaving us with nothing. She was never able to buy me a bike or the doll my sister wanted. I can’t remember how many times I’d heard my mom cry herself to sleep.

“Hey roomie. I didn’t expect you home so early.” Luke closes the door, throwing his duffel bag full of sweaty gym clothes on the floor. “But now that you’re here, you ready for a crazy night? We can start early.”

Luke’s cool. I found his ad looking for a roommate on Craigslist. We have a lot in common: working out, girls, and casinos. He likes to gamble and so do I. It comes in handy when I need a quick infusion of cash. Gambling is harmless, but my sister thinks I have an addiction. Alcoholism is a big problem on my dad’s side of the family, and it tore our family apart. Alcohol makes you do
stupid
shit.

It only took one time for my dad’s addiction to cross the line with Momma. I saw red at the way he was treating her. I went after him, tackling him to the floor, and knocking him out cold, glad that I was there to put him in his place. I made her get a restraining order so that she and my sister would be safe. I couldn’t promise them that I’d always be there when they needed me. Nobody knew when he would come back around; he was like a ticking time bomb when he was drinking. Dad calls now and then, but only when he needs money. I give it to him because he’s my dad and I want stay in touch with him to make sure that he’s still alive.

“No doubt. But do me a favor and take care of that sweaty shit in your bag would ya?” I cringe in disgust at the stench wafting in the air.

“No worries, dude. I’ll take care of it.” He replies. Opening the fridge he grabs a beer, which is all we ever really have in there. Luke twists the cap off, empties half of it in one swallow, and throws his baseball cap on the table.

“Listen, I’m gonna run at the track, shower, and then we can head out around nine.” I say before heading to my bedroom to change out of my work clothes.

“Sounds good. I hope you don’t mind but I invited a couple of female friends.” He grins widely like a cat that just swallowed a mouse. Luke’s good in that department. He’s got friends in college, so he meets copious amounts of sexy co-eds. It helps that he played on the baseball team, so he gets everything at the top of the food chain when it comes to women. He’s muscular like me but with shaggy blonde hair and blue eyes that get him plenty of loving. Of course, he doesn’t discriminate either. We both like to give most females the opportunity just as long as they meet certain stipulations. Right now, I think we’re running neck and neck in the ladies department. But who’s keeping track?

“You know I’m always down for some female company,” I reply, trying to put my personal shit on the back burner.

“My friend, I think you’ll be happy with what I picked up for tonight.” He walks over and slaps me on the back. “I’ll see you in a few. Don’t run too hard. You may want to save some of your energy for tonight, if you know what I mean.” He laughs, downing the rest of the beer and going to the fridge for another.

I laugh. “No doubt.” Maybe that will help to get Elle out of my head. This shit can’t be happening to me.

The track is behind my apartment. I run every morning before I go to work, but tonight I really needed to run off all this pent up energy and emotions going through my head. It’s warm out so I forgo the shirt and change into my shorts and running shoes. Normally there are people on the track and kids at the playground, but it’s darker than usual and the streetlights barely light the track. I have the whole place to myself.

I stretch and then start at a slow trot. My legs feel strong and I speed up to a sprint feeling the wind against me as images flash in front of me of my mom and my life back home. I haven’t thought about it too much in the past few days, but I have a feeling something’s wrong. I try to shake it off. Tommy would’ve told me when he called me; surely, he wouldn’t keep anything from me.

I run eight laps and decide to run to the park. I don’t know if it was a good idea to bring Elle here. Will I think of her every time I come here? Before, this was my own space to be alone; now, her image lingers in my mind.
Fuck.
A girl has never knocked me for a loop like this. I’m gonna need to find a distraction to get her out of my mind tonight. I’ve always been able to separate my feelings from my needs, but this girl has a hold on me somehow.

I look over my shoulder toward the park before it disappears from my view and wonder what just happened, what provoked me to touch him. It was spontaneous, unexpected, and something you just don’t do when you’re in a relationship with someone you love. It was a lapse in judgment, nothing more. I was just trying to be a friend, and make him feel welcome. Those were my intentions.

Something about Reed is different. Is it the way he looks at me? His Texas drawl? His whole aura screams trouble. Is that what attracts me? I’ve never been into bad boys. I’ve always played it safe, because I’m not interested in all the drama that comes with dealing with them. But, I can’t deny something is there. We shared a moment in the park and it felt good. I know for a fact that I’ll
need
to keep a safe distance from him, but that’s going to be difficult since we work together.

When I get home, Cane’s in the living room watching a baseball game on TV with Jace. “Hey guys.” I smile, forgetting everything that just happened at the park when I see Cane’s tired sexy eyes meet mine. I feel my heart beat a little quicker just seeing him.
Yes, I’m a lucky girl.
“What happened to you today? You left me dozing in the lounge and didn’t tell me you were leaving. Everything okay?” I reach over the couch from behind him and wrap my arms around his neck. I smile at Jace, who nods in my direction, and then returns his hazel eyes to the TV.