Bound Together (80 page)
Authors: Marie Coulson
He smiled. “It’s not.
Jared- Mr. Garrett is an old friend and I owe him a lot. He gave me
this job when I was down and out; he really took a chance on me. I
was in a mess and he bailed me out.”
I gave him a curious
look.
“
I met him in high school
and one day he got in a fight with these two guys and I jumped in
to help out. We lost touch until about four years later, just after
his parents died. I was heavily into coke and heroin. I was dealing
and things went bad. I ended up getting stabbed in the
gut.”
I stared at him in
horror. I had no idea he’d had that kind of life. I knew he was
young but I hadn’t realized he and Jared were the same age. “Anyway
Jared was at the hospital visiting Lorraine, she’d just had some
minor surgery and he saw me. We talked and he said he wanted to
help me. Said he owed me for what I did for him in school. He got
me into rehab, paid for all my treatment and gave me this job. I
even have one of his apartments rent free while I work for
him.”
Reaching my room, I
wrapped my arms around him and he stood stiffly as I hugged him.
Pecking him on the cheek, I smiled as he blushed. “Thank you
Daniel. For everything.”
“
Anytime. You’re a good
person, you know? People like you are rare these days and I’m sorry
we’ve had to part in such sad circumstances.” He frowned and I felt
a little upset myself. Daniel was a good man and he genuinely cared
about Jared, about Lucy and even about me. “Take care of yourself
Miss Jennings.” I gave him a weak smile before watching him as he
walked down the hallway and out of sight.
Opening my door I froze,
screamed and turned to face the door as I saw Amy in bed, naked
with my best friend.
“
Oh my god! I’m so sorry.
I’ll go.” Closing the door, I heard them giggling as I stood in the
hallway.
Mel yelled through the
door, “Layla, come back in here. It’s fine.”
Squeezing my eyes closed
I re-entered. “Is it safe? Are you both decent?”
Mel laughed. “Depends
what you consider decent I guess.”
“
Are you
clothed?”
Simultaneously, they
answered with a resounding yes. Opening my eyes I stared at the two
of them as they sat snickering in Amy’s bed.
“
Someone want to explain
this to me?” Glancing at Mel, Amy grinned.
“
Well, we got a little
tipsy last night and when Jared called to tell us to stay put and
bolt the door, Mel said we should stay together for safety. She was
about ready to murder Felix when Jared told us but once we knew you
were safe and that he hadn’t…you know, we got to talking. We got a
little drunker and I kind of blurted out how I feel about
her.”
Leaning in, Mel kissed
her cheek. “And I told her that she should have said something
sooner.”
Getting out of the bed I
was relieved to see that Mel was wearing shorts with her tank top.
Approaching me, she looked nervous; the most anxious I had ever
seen her in our entire time as friends.
“
I’m bisexual Layla. I’ve
known since we were fourteen. I figured it out when I developed a
crush on Samantha Bowman in our gym class. I couldn’t tell you
because I didn’t want you to think I was different from the Mel
you’d always known. The play flights and the way we’ve always been
so close and intimate, that’s always been us and I didn’t want you
to think it was sexual and pull away from me.”
I was sure she expected
me to be shocked, amazed or even disgusted but to be honest very
little shocked me anymore and it seemed to make perfect sense that
my commitment phobic friend swung both ways.
Tilting my head, I gave
her a sympathetic smile. “Oh Melanie. I would never think that. I
love you like a sister and as long as you’re happy, I’m happy. I
don’t care if your preference is a table. I would still love you. I
might have you committed but I’d still love you.” Turning my
attention to Amy I smiled at her. “So I assume the two of you had
an interesting discussion last night.”
Glancing back at Amy, Mel
winked at me. “We’re taking it slow but we do like each other a
lot. I always thought she was hot and now I know how she feels, I
don’t see any reason in hiding it. You know, we know, Ollie knows
we’re into each other. He figured it out at the bar. And as for our
parents, well we said we’ll tell them when the time comes.”
Bouncing out of bed, Amy wrapped her arms around Mel’s waist and
kissed her cheek. My heart swelled with happiness as I watched my
two best friends hug, kiss and make goo-goo eyes at each other. It
was that perfect honey mooning moment every new couple shared and
it immediately made me think of my own romantic predicament.
Noticing my expression, Mel gave me a quizzical look.
“
What is it? What’s
wrong?”
Walking to my bed I
crashed down onto it and let out a long breath. “You mean aside
from almost being raped by Felix last night? Jared. What
else?”
Sitting on either side of
me they stared at me waiting for me to elaborate. “He told me
everything. The reasons he’s been acting the way he has lately. He
told me about Alicia, who he is not dating, by the way, and that
everything he did he did it to protect me. All of it. The
dishonesty, what he did, with Alicia in the bar, everything. He
said he still loves me and he begged me to go back to
him.”
Mouths open, they gawked
at me.
“
That’s not all. He’s
going to Europe for a year and he asked me to go with
him.”
Shaking her head Mel
stared at me. “God Layla you don’t do simple do you? First Ollie
and Utah, now Jared and Europe. What did you say?”
“
What could I say? I told
him I love Ollie too and he said he wouldn’t give up fighting for
me. Said he’ll wait forever. Either way, no matter what I decide, I
lose one or both of them. I can’t do that.”
Leaning my head on Mel’s
shoulder, I could feel tears stinging my eyes. Amy placed a
reassuring hand on my shoulder. “It’s not the choice between Utah
or Europe you have to make though is it Layla? It’s Jared or
Ollie.”
Nodding, I flopped my
face into my hands. “What am I going to do? I love them both and I
want them both but I know I can’t have that. It’s one of them or
neither and it sucks. It’s not fair for them to put me in this
position.”
Mel snorted. “I’d say you
put yourself there sweetie and now you have to find your way out.
You’ll figure it out. You just need time.”
I stared at the window,
trying to think straight or to even begin pondering it at all. My
gut told me exactly what I needed to do and grabbing my keys and an
overnight bag, I packed a few essentials.
“
Where are you
going?”
Stuffing some clothes
into the large duffle bag, I glanced back at my friends who were
watching me with curiosity. “I need some space. I’m going home
to
Pasadena
for a
few days. I need to talk to my mom. I’ll call in a few days
alright? We have all week to get our stuff before summer break so
I’ll be back before Friday. Ok?”
Handing me my cell and
purse, they gripped me tightly in a group hug. Placing a quick peck
on both their cheeks I smiled and gave them a wink. “Behave
yourselves while I’m away.” Grinning, they nodded and with a final
glance at them, I headed out to my car. Tossing my bag and purse
into the passenger seat, I started her up and the sound of ‘All
Time Low’ echoed through the speakers. It reminded me of Ollie.
Switching it off, I decided silence was my best option. I needed a
clear head and the distracting memories of winter break were not
making it easier at all.
a wave of relief flooded me as I saw dad’s car missing. I needed a
little mother daughter time and with him at work we had at least
six hours to ourselves. Grabbing my bag, I jogged up the driveway
to the door. I could hear the sound of ‘Duran Duran’ as I stepped
inside. Mom was definitely home alone, she’d never dream of
subjecting my father to it if he were home. He was strictly a
classic rock and Clapton man. Dropping my keys on the table in the
hallway, I dumped my bag by the door and went in search of
her.
Turning the corner into
the living room I smiled to myself as I watched her dance around
with a duster in one hand and her spring cleaning bright yellow
bandana over her hair. It was as though she’d never left or been
gone for seven years. It was so normal, so routine and it was
exactly what I needed. Shimmying and shaking my ass, I joined her.
Spotting me, her mouth flew open and her face lit up as she sang
loudly to the music and continued to dance around the room. Opening
my lungs I belted out the words with her, letting go of the tension
I had been holding for the past hour as I drove home. It was
freeing and my favorite type of therapy. Taking my hand, she pulled
me around the coffee table shaking her ass and holding her duster
in the other hand like a mic.
The music ending, we
landed on the sofa panting and laughing breathlessly. Turning to
face me, mom curled her leg beneath her and leaned her head on her
hand. “So what brings my baby home a week early?”
Scooting over to her, I
laid my head against her chest and exhaled loudly. “I’m in such a
mess Mom.”
Stroking my hair she held
me to her “What’s happened?”
“
I’m in love with two
men.”
I felt her smile against
my forehead and she pressed a kiss on skin. “Well I’d say that’s
quite a situation.”
“
That’s not all. Ollie
moved to Utah and he wants me to follow him there.”
Her head snapped up and
she lifted my chin to look at her. “Utah? Are you here to tell me
my little girl is leaving California for good?”
I shook my head. “No, I
don’t know what I’m going to do but there’s more. Jared’s leaving
in two days to go to Europe for a year Mom and the thought of being
without him is tearing me apart. I learned some things recently
that change everything I knew or thought I knew about us. And to
top it off, I still love him. He wants me to go with him. But I
have a life here, college and you guys. I’m so confused it’s making
me sick.”
Shaking her head, she
gazed at me wide eyed. “I’m lost for words and that never happens.
Well first things first. We need ice-cream, lots of it and at least
one bottle of wine.”
“
You know daddy won’t
like me drinking Mom.”
Getting up from the sofa
she headed for the kitchen yelling over her shoulder, “It’s not for
you baby. I’m going to need a drink if were honestly going to talk
about you leaving me for either another state or another
country.”
Two tubs of ice-cream
later I leaned back into the plump cushion of the couch and pulled
my knees to my chest. My mother, who was now on her second bottle
of chardonnay, was beginning to get very over affectionate and as
she pulled me to her, spilling some of her wine in the process as I
rolled my eyes. “Baby I don’t know what to say. We could sit here
all day and weigh up the pros and cons for each option but in the
end you’re going to have to let one of them go and yes it will
hurt, and it will most certainly be a horrible thing to go through;
but you know it’s right. You can’t keep them both holding on,
praying you’ll choose them.” Tears rolled down my cheeks as I
thought about my life without them in it. “But how do I possibly
decide who it is. I love them both and I don’t want to lose either
of them.”
Hushing me, she stroked
her fingertips up and down my arm. “I know baby, and it hurts me
seeing you so tormented but you have to do this by yourself. No one
can make this choice for you. You remember what I said to you that
day on the stairs?
Falling in love is
easy, letting that love go, is hard. But your heart will always
have the right answer. You just have to listen to it and figure out
what it’s telling you.”
Wiping my eyes I gazed up
at her. “Either one I choose means I’d be leaving you, daddy, Mel
and Amy behind too.”
Smiling she pecked me on
the forehead. “And we would miss you more than the desert misses
the rain. But this is your life. College will be waiting for you
when you’re ready to go back and Amy and Mel will understand. There
are always cell phones, email and that social networking thing you
use, the one with the bird. I’m sure you girls can keep in touch.
You can come home whenever you want and you just try and stop me
from visiting.” Opening the front door, my father yelled out my
name, obviously seeing my car in the driveway. Mom called out to
him that we were in the living room and within seconds he was
crouching in front of me stroking my face with his black, greasy
thumbs. “Hey baby, what’s going on?”
I really didn’t want to
go over it all again and especially with my father. I gave her a
pleading look she nodded and signaled for my dad to follow her to
the kitchen.
Turning on the TV, I
tried to drown out the sound of my parents talking about my
situation. My father was clearly not thrilled at the idea of me not
only dropping out of college but also leaving California. Leaving
him. “This is her life Andrew. You always tell me I should let her
live it so I am. She’s twenty years old. We have to let her go
sometime. She has to make her own choices and if they turn out to
be the wrong ones it’s our job to be here waiting for her when she
needs us to pick up the pieces. Now get in there and give your
little girl a hug. I think right now she could use the one man in
her life that’s always been her rock to give her a little support.”
I smiled a little hearing her words. My mother was a force of
nature and hearing her finally accept my right to lead my own life
was liberating.
Jared- Mr. Garrett is an old friend and I owe him a lot. He gave me
this job when I was down and out; he really took a chance on me. I
was in a mess and he bailed me out.”
I gave him a curious
look.
“
I met him in high school
and one day he got in a fight with these two guys and I jumped in
to help out. We lost touch until about four years later, just after
his parents died. I was heavily into coke and heroin. I was dealing
and things went bad. I ended up getting stabbed in the
gut.”
I stared at him in
horror. I had no idea he’d had that kind of life. I knew he was
young but I hadn’t realized he and Jared were the same age. “Anyway
Jared was at the hospital visiting Lorraine, she’d just had some
minor surgery and he saw me. We talked and he said he wanted to
help me. Said he owed me for what I did for him in school. He got
me into rehab, paid for all my treatment and gave me this job. I
even have one of his apartments rent free while I work for
him.”
Reaching my room, I
wrapped my arms around him and he stood stiffly as I hugged him.
Pecking him on the cheek, I smiled as he blushed. “Thank you
Daniel. For everything.”
“
Anytime. You’re a good
person, you know? People like you are rare these days and I’m sorry
we’ve had to part in such sad circumstances.” He frowned and I felt
a little upset myself. Daniel was a good man and he genuinely cared
about Jared, about Lucy and even about me. “Take care of yourself
Miss Jennings.” I gave him a weak smile before watching him as he
walked down the hallway and out of sight.
Opening my door I froze,
screamed and turned to face the door as I saw Amy in bed, naked
with my best friend.
“
Oh my god! I’m so sorry.
I’ll go.” Closing the door, I heard them giggling as I stood in the
hallway.
Mel yelled through the
door, “Layla, come back in here. It’s fine.”
Squeezing my eyes closed
I re-entered. “Is it safe? Are you both decent?”
Mel laughed. “Depends
what you consider decent I guess.”
“
Are you
clothed?”
Simultaneously, they
answered with a resounding yes. Opening my eyes I stared at the two
of them as they sat snickering in Amy’s bed.
“
Someone want to explain
this to me?” Glancing at Mel, Amy grinned.
“
Well, we got a little
tipsy last night and when Jared called to tell us to stay put and
bolt the door, Mel said we should stay together for safety. She was
about ready to murder Felix when Jared told us but once we knew you
were safe and that he hadn’t…you know, we got to talking. We got a
little drunker and I kind of blurted out how I feel about
her.”
Leaning in, Mel kissed
her cheek. “And I told her that she should have said something
sooner.”
Getting out of the bed I
was relieved to see that Mel was wearing shorts with her tank top.
Approaching me, she looked nervous; the most anxious I had ever
seen her in our entire time as friends.
“
I’m bisexual Layla. I’ve
known since we were fourteen. I figured it out when I developed a
crush on Samantha Bowman in our gym class. I couldn’t tell you
because I didn’t want you to think I was different from the Mel
you’d always known. The play flights and the way we’ve always been
so close and intimate, that’s always been us and I didn’t want you
to think it was sexual and pull away from me.”
I was sure she expected
me to be shocked, amazed or even disgusted but to be honest very
little shocked me anymore and it seemed to make perfect sense that
my commitment phobic friend swung both ways.
Tilting my head, I gave
her a sympathetic smile. “Oh Melanie. I would never think that. I
love you like a sister and as long as you’re happy, I’m happy. I
don’t care if your preference is a table. I would still love you. I
might have you committed but I’d still love you.” Turning my
attention to Amy I smiled at her. “So I assume the two of you had
an interesting discussion last night.”
Glancing back at Amy, Mel
winked at me. “We’re taking it slow but we do like each other a
lot. I always thought she was hot and now I know how she feels, I
don’t see any reason in hiding it. You know, we know, Ollie knows
we’re into each other. He figured it out at the bar. And as for our
parents, well we said we’ll tell them when the time comes.”
Bouncing out of bed, Amy wrapped her arms around Mel’s waist and
kissed her cheek. My heart swelled with happiness as I watched my
two best friends hug, kiss and make goo-goo eyes at each other. It
was that perfect honey mooning moment every new couple shared and
it immediately made me think of my own romantic predicament.
Noticing my expression, Mel gave me a quizzical look.
“
What is it? What’s
wrong?”
Walking to my bed I
crashed down onto it and let out a long breath. “You mean aside
from almost being raped by Felix last night? Jared. What
else?”
Sitting on either side of
me they stared at me waiting for me to elaborate. “He told me
everything. The reasons he’s been acting the way he has lately. He
told me about Alicia, who he is not dating, by the way, and that
everything he did he did it to protect me. All of it. The
dishonesty, what he did, with Alicia in the bar, everything. He
said he still loves me and he begged me to go back to
him.”
Mouths open, they gawked
at me.
“
That’s not all. He’s
going to Europe for a year and he asked me to go with
him.”
Shaking her head Mel
stared at me. “God Layla you don’t do simple do you? First Ollie
and Utah, now Jared and Europe. What did you say?”
“
What could I say? I told
him I love Ollie too and he said he wouldn’t give up fighting for
me. Said he’ll wait forever. Either way, no matter what I decide, I
lose one or both of them. I can’t do that.”
Leaning my head on Mel’s
shoulder, I could feel tears stinging my eyes. Amy placed a
reassuring hand on my shoulder. “It’s not the choice between Utah
or Europe you have to make though is it Layla? It’s Jared or
Ollie.”
Nodding, I flopped my
face into my hands. “What am I going to do? I love them both and I
want them both but I know I can’t have that. It’s one of them or
neither and it sucks. It’s not fair for them to put me in this
position.”
Mel snorted. “I’d say you
put yourself there sweetie and now you have to find your way out.
You’ll figure it out. You just need time.”
I stared at the window,
trying to think straight or to even begin pondering it at all. My
gut told me exactly what I needed to do and grabbing my keys and an
overnight bag, I packed a few essentials.
“
Where are you
going?”
Stuffing some clothes
into the large duffle bag, I glanced back at my friends who were
watching me with curiosity. “I need some space. I’m going home
to
Pasadena
for a
few days. I need to talk to my mom. I’ll call in a few days
alright? We have all week to get our stuff before summer break so
I’ll be back before Friday. Ok?”
Handing me my cell and
purse, they gripped me tightly in a group hug. Placing a quick peck
on both their cheeks I smiled and gave them a wink. “Behave
yourselves while I’m away.” Grinning, they nodded and with a final
glance at them, I headed out to my car. Tossing my bag and purse
into the passenger seat, I started her up and the sound of ‘All
Time Low’ echoed through the speakers. It reminded me of Ollie.
Switching it off, I decided silence was my best option. I needed a
clear head and the distracting memories of winter break were not
making it easier at all.
* * *
a wave of relief flooded me as I saw dad’s car missing. I needed a
little mother daughter time and with him at work we had at least
six hours to ourselves. Grabbing my bag, I jogged up the driveway
to the door. I could hear the sound of ‘Duran Duran’ as I stepped
inside. Mom was definitely home alone, she’d never dream of
subjecting my father to it if he were home. He was strictly a
classic rock and Clapton man. Dropping my keys on the table in the
hallway, I dumped my bag by the door and went in search of
her.
Turning the corner into
the living room I smiled to myself as I watched her dance around
with a duster in one hand and her spring cleaning bright yellow
bandana over her hair. It was as though she’d never left or been
gone for seven years. It was so normal, so routine and it was
exactly what I needed. Shimmying and shaking my ass, I joined her.
Spotting me, her mouth flew open and her face lit up as she sang
loudly to the music and continued to dance around the room. Opening
my lungs I belted out the words with her, letting go of the tension
I had been holding for the past hour as I drove home. It was
freeing and my favorite type of therapy. Taking my hand, she pulled
me around the coffee table shaking her ass and holding her duster
in the other hand like a mic.
The music ending, we
landed on the sofa panting and laughing breathlessly. Turning to
face me, mom curled her leg beneath her and leaned her head on her
hand. “So what brings my baby home a week early?”
Scooting over to her, I
laid my head against her chest and exhaled loudly. “I’m in such a
mess Mom.”
Stroking my hair she held
me to her “What’s happened?”
“
I’m in love with two
men.”
I felt her smile against
my forehead and she pressed a kiss on skin. “Well I’d say that’s
quite a situation.”
“
That’s not all. Ollie
moved to Utah and he wants me to follow him there.”
Her head snapped up and
she lifted my chin to look at her. “Utah? Are you here to tell me
my little girl is leaving California for good?”
I shook my head. “No, I
don’t know what I’m going to do but there’s more. Jared’s leaving
in two days to go to Europe for a year Mom and the thought of being
without him is tearing me apart. I learned some things recently
that change everything I knew or thought I knew about us. And to
top it off, I still love him. He wants me to go with him. But I
have a life here, college and you guys. I’m so confused it’s making
me sick.”
Shaking her head, she
gazed at me wide eyed. “I’m lost for words and that never happens.
Well first things first. We need ice-cream, lots of it and at least
one bottle of wine.”
“
You know daddy won’t
like me drinking Mom.”
Getting up from the sofa
she headed for the kitchen yelling over her shoulder, “It’s not for
you baby. I’m going to need a drink if were honestly going to talk
about you leaving me for either another state or another
country.”
Two tubs of ice-cream
later I leaned back into the plump cushion of the couch and pulled
my knees to my chest. My mother, who was now on her second bottle
of chardonnay, was beginning to get very over affectionate and as
she pulled me to her, spilling some of her wine in the process as I
rolled my eyes. “Baby I don’t know what to say. We could sit here
all day and weigh up the pros and cons for each option but in the
end you’re going to have to let one of them go and yes it will
hurt, and it will most certainly be a horrible thing to go through;
but you know it’s right. You can’t keep them both holding on,
praying you’ll choose them.” Tears rolled down my cheeks as I
thought about my life without them in it. “But how do I possibly
decide who it is. I love them both and I don’t want to lose either
of them.”
Hushing me, she stroked
her fingertips up and down my arm. “I know baby, and it hurts me
seeing you so tormented but you have to do this by yourself. No one
can make this choice for you. You remember what I said to you that
day on the stairs?
Falling in love is
easy, letting that love go, is hard. But your heart will always
have the right answer. You just have to listen to it and figure out
what it’s telling you.”
Wiping my eyes I gazed up
at her. “Either one I choose means I’d be leaving you, daddy, Mel
and Amy behind too.”
Smiling she pecked me on
the forehead. “And we would miss you more than the desert misses
the rain. But this is your life. College will be waiting for you
when you’re ready to go back and Amy and Mel will understand. There
are always cell phones, email and that social networking thing you
use, the one with the bird. I’m sure you girls can keep in touch.
You can come home whenever you want and you just try and stop me
from visiting.” Opening the front door, my father yelled out my
name, obviously seeing my car in the driveway. Mom called out to
him that we were in the living room and within seconds he was
crouching in front of me stroking my face with his black, greasy
thumbs. “Hey baby, what’s going on?”
I really didn’t want to
go over it all again and especially with my father. I gave her a
pleading look she nodded and signaled for my dad to follow her to
the kitchen.
Turning on the TV, I
tried to drown out the sound of my parents talking about my
situation. My father was clearly not thrilled at the idea of me not
only dropping out of college but also leaving California. Leaving
him. “This is her life Andrew. You always tell me I should let her
live it so I am. She’s twenty years old. We have to let her go
sometime. She has to make her own choices and if they turn out to
be the wrong ones it’s our job to be here waiting for her when she
needs us to pick up the pieces. Now get in there and give your
little girl a hug. I think right now she could use the one man in
her life that’s always been her rock to give her a little support.”
I smiled a little hearing her words. My mother was a force of
nature and hearing her finally accept my right to lead my own life
was liberating.
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