Bound by Lies (40 page)

Voice roughened, eyes prickling with tears that he tells himself are from the chill and the sun, Brayden pleads for the life he chose, because he can see Jenner getting out of the car with Max right behind him. Eyes widening slightly as he beseeches, opening himself up as much as he ever has, with anyone, Brayden asks his dearest friend, “Please, just
try
. Try so that I don’t have to lose you. I don’t want to lose anyone anymore.”

He laughs a little as he says it, out of desperation, to keep from falling apart. It feels like he’s standing on the edge of a cliff, ready to fall into the abyss and have everything that he has left ripped from him forever.

Time measures out in heartbeats as Brayden’s pulse
thump-thump-thump
s under his skin, knocking out a steady, rapid rhythm inside his chest. He holds Andre’s gaze and watches him try to decide what to do, knowing Brayden as well as he does, and what it all means going forward.

Each beat moves Jenner closer, his steps long and crossing the distance fast, with Max just behind, hurrying to keep up.

The pain of what it would cost Brayden to lose Andre, then and there, is a knife in his chest. It all blurs and he doesn’t see it as Jenner gets to him, but he does feel the arm that slings around his shoulders, and the breath that warms his cheek as Jenner asks softly, “Hey, are you okay?”

It becomes too hard, suddenly, like it did when confronting Max and Art, but it’s worse because becoming estranged from new friends is not as terrible a prospect as facing the same fate with Andre, who showed Brayden that it was okay to want what he wanted, and who has been there when Brayden sorely needed someone. Touching his forehead to Jenner’s shoulder, Brayden draws strength from his nearness. Still smiling but in a heartbroken way, Brayden tries to speak; it thickens into a sob that sticks in his throat, choking him. Tears slip down Brayden’s cheeks and Jenner folds him up in a hug. Brayden grasps at Jenner like a drowning man.

But then Brayden doesn’t know what to do. He’s lost, completely and truly, and has given all he has. There’s no more courage left in him or, at least, that’s how it feels. Next comes the familiar sorrow of loss, as dense and thick as fog rolling in. He’s losing Andre. Someday he’ll lose Jenner too. It’s unavoidable.

Out of nowhere, catching Brayden entirely by surprise, he feels someone hug him from behind. Because this someone’s arms wrap around under his arms, thin and delicate, he knows it to be Max.

A laugh is startled out of him, and he snorts against Jenner’s coat.

“Fuck,” Max
tsk
s, “He’s so damn sensitive sometimes! Okay, Braydy, I give! You win. I’m sorry I said that the Marlins suck donkey balls. They suck
fish
balls.”

Hysterical laughter peels from Brayden as he snorts again. When he glances over his shoulder at Max, he sees she is leaning her cheek against his shoulder with a goofy, love-struck smirk.

“I love you, Max.”

“Wait. Do fish have balls? I don’t think I’ve ever seen testicles on a flounder.”

Andre clears his throat. Brayden sighs, and reluctantly looks over at him. Detangling from Jenner, he shoos Max away, wriggling out of her arms when she tries to grab his ass.

“You gonna introduce me or what?” Andre asks. “Now that I’ve made you cry and I feel like an asshole.”

“You didn’t make me cry,” Brayden murmurs, dropping his gaze. He cringes as he realizes that people are looking at them. “It’s not easy to do this, you know. I’ve always sucked at confrontations. That’s why I got my ass handed to me so much in school.”

He’d never told Andre much about what life was like before moving to Miami, when he was just that quiet, sad kid that everyone pitied, with a crumbling support system and no secrets at all because everyone knew everything about him already. It had been Brayden’s attempt at starting over, trying to move on, but no matter how many miles you travel, some things will always stay inside, waiting to come out. Standing there in front of Andre, drying his eyes, Brayden feels like he’s not only introducing his new friends, he’s introducing that scared, imperfect small-town boy he thought he would never have to be again.

Jenner gathers him back under the comforting, solid weight of his left arm and kisses the side of his head. The display of affection, for anyone to see, almost makes Brayden lose it again. He bites the inside of his cheek to keep the tears at bay. Once he knows his voice will be steady, he answers, “Andre, this is Jenner Parrish and our friend Maxine. They prefer to be called Parrish and Max, respectively.”

Jenner immediately offers a hand and says, “Nice to meet you, Andre.”

Brayden averts his eyes, bracing for whatever comes next, expecting the worst.

Andre holds back for only a second, looking Jenner over, from his dark, curly hair to his pale complexion and handsome features, his impressive build and height, but mostly his eyes, measuring him for the man that he is beyond the superficial.

Then, Andre takes the offered hand and shakes it. “Parrish. Good to meet you.”

Andre turns to Max next. He takes her hand with a more gentle salutation. “And you, Max.”

“Why don’t we get something to eat or drink and find a table, hmm?” Jenner suggests politely, putting on a friendly grin as other patrons continue to stare.

They queue up and order scones and coffee, which they take to a booth inside the cafe where the seats and noise will give them some privacy. Max sits beside Andre. Jenner slides in next to Brayden.

Sensing that Andre hesitates to speak out of uncertainty of how much to acknowledge in mixed company, Brayden assures him, “Max knows all about me and Jenner. We’re trying to be honest with people we trust for once. On Sunday, we’re going to dinner at Jenner’s parent’s house to tell them we’re together.”

“What about Lara? Ruth?”

Brayden shakes his head, chewing on his lip. “But I moved in with Jenner. I’ll get there, and tell them. Once I figure out how.”

“It’s not complicated, Marsha. You just
tell them
.”

“It’s not that easy,” Brayden says bitterly.

“Marsha. Marsha Braydy. Huh. I like that,” Max starts, trying to lighten the mood.

“Don’t get
any
fucking ideas, woman,” Brayden warns.

“Yeah, what’re you gonna do, tough guy?” she teases.

“So, you’re his Master,” Andre says to Jenner, deadpan and direct.

The atmosphere turns cold as ice in an instant. The awkward tension comes right back.

“Yeah. I am,” Jenner agrees, not backing down or seeming shocked, just calm and alert.

“You know what you’re doing?”

“Yes. I do. We’re careful.”

“If you ever really hurt him, I’ll fucking kill you.”

“I accept that,” Jenner replies with a nod.

“Cool. Are you really going to come out to your family for him?”

“Not just for him. For me, too.”

Andre digests this, looking Jenner over. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Brayden repeats hopefully. “Really?”

“Really. I can tell that he cares about you. I appreciate his honesty. I’d be able to smell it if there was any bullshit.”

“Yeah, I totally hate bullshit. Super smelly,” Max murmurs in meek agreement over the lip of her coffee cup.

Andre looks sideways down at her next to him, and she gazes up with wide, innocent eyes, lined darkly with purple eyeliner to accentuate their almond shape.

“This girl is fucking crazy. I like her,” Andre chuckles.

“I hate to break it to ya, dude, but I hear you’re queer,” Max whispers with apparent regret. “But I’d
totally
blow you in the bathroom if you’re into it. Got a thing for black dudes.
Huge
penises.”

“Max!” Brayden gasps, then starts laughing his ass off. “Holy shit!”

Andre laughs with him and Jenner smiles. Wrapping an arm around Max, companionably, Andre draws her to his side.

“See?” Max says to them. “Works every time. Honesty. God bless it.”

The sit-down with Andre appears to work wonders on freeing Brayden of some stress. Jenner decides that he seems lighter for it. It also causes a definite but subtle shift in Jenner’s mindset. The flirting with Max and the brief affectionate touches from Andre leave Jenner wanting to claim Brayden as his own, to remind him where he belongs.

When it comes time to say goodbye to Andre, Brayden glances to Jenner for non-verbal permission to do so with a hug. Brayden is somewhat chagrined when Jenner doesn’t just give in with a nod, but instead says quietly, “Ask me.”

“Jenn, come on.”

“I’d like you to ask.”

Andre and Max are both looking at them. Embarrassed but with heat evident behind the look he gives Jenner, Brayden asks, “Is it okay with you if I hug Andre and say goodbye?”

Jenner is unmoved because Brayden knows what Jenner is waiting for. Part of their game has always involved nudging Brayden slowly closer to where Jenner expects him to be, filling the role of the dutiful slave. For his own reasons, Brayden needs Jenner to give him that push to get there, rather than offer it willingly. So, Jenner pushes, for Brayden’s sake.

“Oh my god. You’re really going to make me say it?”

“I’m waiting,” Jenner says impassively. “Show some respect.”

Brayden lowers his eyes. Jenner almost smiles, because he can tell that Brayden is enjoying this, though maybe not consciously. But the worry and sadness over Andre’s visit, over imagined possibilities and the future all seem forgotten as Brayden searches for the courage to speak the words that Jenner waits for. All of Brayden’s attention is focused only on the here and now. For the moment, at least, nothing else matters.

Standing mere inches from Jenner, Brayden whispers to him, “Is it okay if I hug Andre and say goodbye,
Sir
?”

“Better. Yes, you may.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

Brayden turns and moves into Andre’s open arms. He lingers, not letting Andre go. After all, Andre has only just gotten there. Jenner understands. That doesn’t mean he has to like it.

“I miss you, man,” Brayden says.

“Me too,” Andre replies, caressing once over the back of Brayden’s head, over his hair, before releasing him. “You should all come and visit sometime. You’re more than welcome.”

Jenner and Andre shake hands, and it’s more than cordial enough to put a happy grin back on Brayden’s face. After Andre kisses Max’s cheek, they head back to the Jeep to go home.

First, they drop Max off at the house. When they get there Jenner parks on the street. Before Max is able to reach for the door handle, Jenner stops her by saying, “Wait a second.”

“What’s up?”

“Well, first off, thank you for coming. It meant a lot to both of us.”

“You’re welcome,” she replies, though looking wary at Jenner’s serious tone. She watches his face in the rearview mirror. Brayden must be able to sense it too, because Jenner is pleased to see that his slave’s head is bowed in the picture of humble obedience.

“But I can’t allow you to continue touching Brayden in a flirtatious way.”

“Jenner,” she scoffs, her mouth agape.

“I’m serious about this, Maxine,” he says, his voice hard. “Brayden knows that one of our rules is that no one touches him but me. I won’t try to regulate your conversations or the way you speak to one another, but touching is off limits. I need you to be aware of that. Twice in the past two days you’ve broken that rule. Brayden will face the consequences for his part in allowing it, but you need to be willing to cooperate, or else I’ll have to keep the two of you apart myself.”

“Wait, what do you mean Brayden will face consequences?”

Brayden groans and hunches forward even more, slouching in his seat. Jenner glances at him with a frown of displeasure, then back at Max. “Nothing to worry about. I assure you it won’t be anything that Brayden won’t enjoy. And you both still know what I said before. Brayden is free to go to you or Art if he needs help or wants to talk. Now, what do you say, Max? Will you behave?”

“What if I need his attention in the bar and it’s loud and I have to tap his shoulder?”

“That’s not what I’m talking about, and you know it. Can you respect my arrangement with Brayden or not?”

“Fine. I’ll cooperate,” she says, somewhat angrily. “But only if you tell me what you’re going to do to Brayden.”

Brayden groans. Jenner snaps, “
Silence
, slave. Okay. If that’s how you want to play it. I’m going to fit Brayden with chastity devices to remind him who he belongs to, to wear at home and at work. There’ll also be corporal punishment and
lots
of sex. Happy?”

“Take video for me?”

“Get out of the fucking car.”

“What if I beg for you, Parrish?” She grins like a cat, and slides over to the door. “Pretty please? Pretty please with cherry-flavored lube on top? No?”

“No.”

With a disappointed sigh, she gets out of the Jeep. Holding the door, she turns back to ask, “But, just to be clear, it’s not against the rules for me to wank to the mental imagery, right?”

“Fantasize all you want, baby. It’s a free country.”

“Thanks, Parrish,” she winks at Brayden and closes the door with a giggle.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Brayden demands as they drive away.

“Silence! Until I say otherwise, you’re on high protocol. I’ll let you know when I want to hear your opinion. You’ve been very disobedient. I intend to teach you how to behave.”

Brayden is quiet, his head bowed, for the rest of the short drive back to the apartment. Once they’re parked, Jenner turns and says, “I don’t remember giving you permission to get an erection, slave.”

“I’m not—”

Jenner’s hand darts out. The fingers close like a vice around the bulge in Brayden’s pants. With a gasp, Brayden’s hips tilt into Jenner’s hand to try to relieve the pressure. His flesh jumps, enjoying the slight pain. Jenner squeezes harder and Brayden whimpers on the exhale. His head falls back against the headrest and he tries to breathe through it.

“Is this for her? Or for me?”

“Y-you, Sir.”

Flattening his hand, Jenner rubs hard over Brayden’s flesh. He watches his slave’s mouth fall open around an unvoiced moan.