Book of Life (28 page)

“That’s because a past doesn’t exist for the thing you are.” I didn’t mean it to sound harsh, but her expression suggested that she took it that way.

She snorted angrily. “I’m no more of a thing than you are. Your past isn’t much, either. It’s not like you have parents you can remember,” she barked.

It stung, but I deserved it. I wondered then what it was like not having parents at all, like her. She was a creation. While I was thinking this she discreetly wiped her eye. “You’re not crying, are you? I honestly didn’t mean that to come across the way you took it. I’m not exactly teeming with finesse. You should have learned that about me by now.”

She pressed her brows together. “I don’t need finesse, just a little normalcy. Everyone looks at me with hate. Do you know what that’s like?” She looked to me for an answer, but didn’t give me time to offer her one. “Emily especially. I realize what I look like but there’s really nothing I can do about it. What I fear is how she’ll treat me if she never gets her sister back. I honestly wouldn’t put it past her to kill me thinking that would solve the problem.”

I snorted and laughed. “Emily, kill you? She’s all bark and no bite, I promise. And she’s not looking at you with hate anymore than she looks at everyone else. That’s just how she is. I call it her
perma-hate
face.”

Stella laughed.

It brought a smile to my face.

“Sometimes I wonder . . .” She was still smiling but let the words fall away.

“Wonder what?” I could guess what she was going to ask. It was something I’d asked myself a lot lately.

“I wonder why you’re with her,” she finished, looking bashful about asking. Bashful was an expression I never saw Jane express much, it looked good on her. She quickly began shaking her head. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t challenge that. It’s not my problem or concern.”

I bit my lip, thinking. “No, don’t apologize. Honestly, it’s nice that someone is even asking to begin with.” I took a moment to formulate just what I wanted to say. “I guess I’m with her because I love her. She’s been through a lot and I keep telling myself that it’s just a phase. I know she’ll come back around to the girl she was before Jane’s death, eventually.”

Stella tilted her head, and I could literally see the next question forming, but I could tell she didn’t want to ask it, either.

“What?” I pressed.

She wrinkled her nose and released it. “Nothing. I need to stop prying.”

I laughed mildly. “Well, you can’t just leave me with that. You know whatever question is on your mind will eat me alive if you don’t share it. You can’t leave me wondering.”

“It’s just, Lacy talks a lot—”

“Not surprised,” I murmured, interrupting.

Stella regrouped, giving me an evil eye, a look I was very used to seeing from Jane. “She talks a lot about the type of person Emily was before, and I mean
before
before—before you.”

I leaned back, still clutching the blanket around me. “How would she know? She didn’t show up until after Emily changed. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about.” I tried to wave it away.

Stella shrugged. “I guess she says she gets it from Jake.”

“Ha!” I hooted. “Like Jake knows anything.”

She was quiet for a moment, just staring and waiting for me to let the chip roll off my shoulder. “I hear Jake knows . . .
a lot . . .
about Emily,” she continued.

I shook my head. “What is this? Gossip hour? You sound like every other girl in our school.”

She frowned then.

I reached forward and bumped my hand against her knee that was covered by layers of blankets. “I’m kidding.
Geez,
you need to learn what it means to joke a little.” I leaned back.

“I don’t think I like joking. I don’t see the use in it.” She sounded so tart. It was cute.

I had to admit she had a lot more edge than Jane ever did, and it suited Jane’s dark features much better. Eyes that always seemed so sad were suddenly teeming with a fire I never knew they could. Could I admit that perhaps Stella’s soul was a better match for this body than Jane’s was? Jane could have better benefited from a little blonde, perhaps a set of green eyes. Was it rude to think?

By now Stella’s voice had grown considerably more seasoned. The hoarseness was nearly gone, and any slight stumbling had disappeared all together.

“How do you allow Jake to be like that? Aren’t you jealous?”

I nodded dramatically. “Of course I’m jealous, but I guess in a way it’s not bothering me so much as of late.”

“Because you care less.” She said it like a statement, like a fact she knew to be true.

I couldn’t help but consider it for a brief moment before rebutting like I felt I had to. “No. No that’s not it. I just know he’s not going to try anything. He’s never going to be allowed by more than just me, even if he did want to try something. It’s against the rules of his kind.”

“Ever heard of the term ‘rules are meant to be broken’?”

“And you have?”

She shrugged. “Clearly.”

I narrowed my gaze. “Don’t even start. He’s not going to break the rules. We’re friends now. On top of everything else he’d never go behind my back.”

Stella just laughed.

I clenched my jaw. “I think I liked you better when you couldn’t talk.”

She stopped laughing, giving me a sour look instead.

I just smiled. I was enjoying the banter between us in the way I used to enjoy it with Jane, and even Emily. I didn’t like how serious everything had become over the last few months. A part of me wished I could ignore it all and just start over.

Just then the door from the house to the garage opened and I felt my heart sink for a couple of reasons. The first was that, somewhere wicked, I didn’t want this moment to be interrupted, the second was the fear of being caught by Emily, or even Sarah. Sarah especially given the fact we were hiding Stella from her until we decided what to do about it. To my surprise, though, it was Max.

“What are
you
doing here?” I barked.

Max’s eyes tracked from me to Stella and back again. “I could ask you the same thing.” He raised his brow, his hand dropping from the door handle. He stepped in as a figure behind him followed, illuminated by the bleeding florescent lights of the garage. She wore a white hooded shawl with a delicate fur trim. It shielded her eyes under the harshness of the light.

For a moment I swore I felt my heart stop beating. I knew exactly who she was without seeing the whole of her face. What was
she
doing here? She slid past him, stepping into the room as Max stepped further in behind her and shut the door. She removed the hood and stood regally before stepping toward Stella, a wad of something bundled in her hand. I flew from the couch, blocking the way between them. “What the heck, Max?” I boomed.
“Stop,”
I then hissed at Avery.

Avery stopped dead in her tracks, looking back over her shoulder at Max.

I looked at Max, too, annoyed by the unconcerned look on his face. “What is this? What are you doing with
her
here?”

“I thought you heard?” he spoke calmly.

I shook my head, but not as my reply. “Yeah, I heard, but I never figured you’d try to bring her
here.
”

“She’s fine, Wes.”

“Fine?” I barked. “That’s not a very convincing choice of words. How do you know she’s fine? You certainly didn’t know before.”

Avery was looking at me once more.

“Don’t you
dare
look at me,” I hissed under my breath.

“I’m sorry, Wes,” she whispered in reply. “I promise I’m not who I was.”

I laughed mockingly. “A promise from you is worthless.”

She tilted her head, eyes solemn. “I understand. I don’t expect you to believe me.”

“What’s in your hands?” I reached to try and pry it from her.

Avery didn’t protest.

Unbundling the wad, I found it to be nothing more than a set of clothes. “What is this?”

“Clothes for Stella,” she answered plainly. Her eyes blinked—her beautiful, spiteful eyes that hid so much when she was posing as Navia.

“Max, I can’t trust her.” I just couldn’t leave it be.

Max stepped toward me, becoming a wedge between Avery and I. “It’s just clothes, Wes. It’s not going to kill her.” He pried the clothes from my hands and handed them to Stella who looked confused but also grateful.

“How did you know we were here?” I went on.

Max shrugged. “The prophets.”

I rolled my eyes. “Of course.” With Max so close, I could finally sense the strain in him. He’d seemed so collected since Jane’s death, but now I saw the flaws, the pain, smelled the anxiety and sadness. But, there was something else, something new. “What’s going on?”

He stood a little taller, raising his chin. “Jane’s gone.”

“Jane’s
gone?
” I didn’t understand what he meant. We knew she was gone already.

“Her body is gone. She chose to be reborn,” he elaborated.

The first thing that came to my mind was that this was a good thing. “But this is good, right? I mean, that would mean she’s back here, or rather that’s what’s been explained to me.”

He shook his head. “It’s not that easy. She’s just a baby at this point. She could be anywhere, anyone. There’s no way to track her down. She’s more lost now than she was before.” There was a shake in his voice. He turned his attention on Stella in his attempt to quell the hollow emotion he was trying to feel, emotion that was dead to him. “Are you alright?”

“How do you know this?” I demanded, trying to bring him back to the problem at hand.

He looked at me again, this time with a certain level of annoyance. “The prophets.”

“Right,” I nodded, meaning to sound annoyed. I no longer possessed the energy to remain so on guard. This was continued bad news, and it was sad that all I could think of was how Emily would react, and what it meant for me. Her attitude within our relationship was not about to change—if anything, it was bound to get worse.

EMILY:

I woke to frantic voices in my head. It was as though they were right there in the room with me. I sat up, hearing Max’s voice, then Wes. I wasn’t really paying attention to what they were saying, not until I heard
her
voice.

I felt my heart start pounding. What in the world was going on? I threw the blankets off me, not surprised to see that Wes was not here—he’d snuck off . . .
again.
I rose from bed and crossed the room, following the direction of the voices and trying to hear what they were saying . . .

“I’m sorry, Wes.” Avery whispered, her mind truly meaning it. But, it had to be a trick. “I promise I’m not who I was.”

Wes laughed mockingly with his thoughts, and I assumed out loud. “A promise from you is worthless.”

At least it was nice to hear Wes was standing up for himself. He’d seemed tired and quiet as of late, not his normal ‘roaring’ self, so to speak—I knew it was because of me. His thoughts were a jumble of things. What the group was saying was the only clear thing my mind could translate.

“
I understand. I don’t expect you to believe me.” Avery replied.

Believe
her? Of course he’s not going to believe her. I can’t believe she’d even go so far to assume he would or was even thinking of it.

I was downstairs now, trying my best to see where they were and what they were doing. I listened hard, the voices echoing loudly in my head. I was surprised they were leaving their minds so open, knowing I was in the vicinity. Then again, maybe they were trying to do it on purpose—Max often did that and I considered it a compliment.

At last I’d narrowed the talking down to the garage, mostly because once I made it into the kitchen, the thoughts I was hearing were then accompanied by the muffled voices behind the garage door. I swung the door open. Max seemed the least surprised, but Wes, you’d think I’d caught him naked with the mail lady.

Looking around, everyone was here except Lacy and Jake. How was it they’d all secretly managed to convene like this, and again, why wasn’t I informed until the last minute? I looked a wreck in old tattered pajamas. I wouldn’t care if it weren’t for Stella in the room. Then again the only person in the room I really
did
care about was the figure in the white coat. She wasn’t facing me, but I knew who she was, and I wasn’t happy about it.

“Emily,” Wes spoke. He looked awkward standing there in front of everyone with nothing but his shorts on.

“Why is
she
here?” I hissed, aiming the question at Max.

Max’s gaze on me was steady and calm. “She’s with me. I promise you she is of no harm.”