Boo Hiss (27 page)

The reverend tried to focus. “Everyone laughed at Noah and made fun of him because of his obedience to God. They told him he was not in his right mind.” The tongue was still out, but now the eyes were squeezed shut. Apparently closing one’s eyes was a more evil form of dishonor in a five-year-old’s world. The reverend grew angry. He just wanted to get this over with. He flipped the page.

“But Noah did not let that distract him. Instead, he listened to God’s voice and designed the boat exactly the way God wanted it.” Willem had now proceeded to make a gagging motion. The reverend wanted to take the kid by the collar and drag him down the aisle to his parents. But that wouldn’t exactly be a great way to start a new tradition. There was already a redhead on the fifth row who looked like she feared for her life.

The reverend flipped the page and turned the book so Willem
could look at the bright, colorful pages. He was going to have to do something to get this kid’s attention.

“You see, the people of the day were incredibly evil. And by evil, I mean as close to a monster as you can get. They were violent, murdering each other without reason. In fact, rumor had it that sticking your tongue out could get you beaten with a stick.” Willems tongue slid back into his mouth. “All these people had no regard for their Maker, didn’t care that God had given them warning after warning. So God got very, very,
very
angry.”

The heads weren’t tilting to the side anymore, and Willems eyes were growing wide. The reverend slapped the page over, just for effect. “Little did they know that their disregard for God, and for Noah’s warnings as well, would lead to a horrible and violent death for each and every one of them. Now, when Noah had finished the boat, God instructed him to bring a male and female animal of each kind onto the boat. When Noah had gathered each animal and then his family, God shut the door to the boat. And then rain began.

“Inside the boat, Noah could hear the screams of the people drowning, begging for him to open the door. But Noah would not. They had not listened to him, and now it was too late.” The reverend smiled at the congregation, but too many jaws were dropping for anyone to smile back. He flipped the page. Little Willem was looking a bit pale.

“So Noah and his family passed their time while it rained by shoveling manure to try to keep the horrible stink down. You’ve got all those animals and no place to use a bathroom, and I’ll tell you what. I think Noah might’ve been tempted to dive off the side of the boat and into the water, you know what I mean? Noah was six hundred years old. You can only shovel so much manure before you start losing your will to live.”

The reverend flipped the page and smiled. “By this time, everybody on the entire earth was dead, including men, women, and children;
puppy dogs and little rabbits. It rained for forty days and forty nights, and the flood remained for a hundred and fifty days. Luckily the rain stopped so they could get a little fresh air. The boat came to rest on top of a mountain, and the flood waters began to recede. Noah opened a window and let out a bird called a raven to see if it could find dry land, but it only flew back and forth. Then Noah let out a dove, but it came back because it couldn’t find a place to land. Can you imagine the depression he was struggling with? They didn’t have Xanax back then, my friend.”

Willem was wide-eyed. “Did they ever see dry land again?”

“The second time the dove was released, it returned with an olive branch.”

“I hate olives, but I would eat it just to be nice to God.”

“The third time, the dove did not return.”

“Was it dead?”

“No. It had found dry land. By this time, Noah was six hundred and one years old. He’d been in the boat for a year. He’d gone half mad at the smell, but he was glad to be alive. Then God told him and his family to release all the animals and to leave the boat. He told them to repopulate the earth, which I’ll let your mother and father explain. God promised never to flood the earth again, so He put a rainbow in the sky as a reminder of this promise.”

Willem looked genuinely relieved. “God’s never going to kill all the evil people again?”

“Nope. In fact, He said that even though we have evil tendencies from childhood, He will never flood the earth again. And you can always believe God’s promises.” The reverend looked down. Oops. He’d forgotten to flip pages. He flipped to the end and pointed to a nice, color-fid drawing of Noah and all the animals standing by the boat with smiles on their faces and a rainbow over their heads. “There’s some puppets waiting downstairs for you in our new children’s area. Go on, now.”

Willem hopped up, his eyes still wide. He started to walk off, then turned back around and said in a quiet voice, “That was really cool.” Then he walked down the aisle.

The reverend cleared his throat, stood up and shut the book. “Now, how about some special music?”

Ainsley worked quietly in the corner while observing Lois’s puppet show. Willem was there by himself, but then a little red-haired girl had joined him. Lois definitely had a gift for puppets, and was thoroughly entertaining the two children. Ainsley had rearranged the food table four times waiting for the crowd to arrive downstairs.

Thumping down the stairs came Katelyn. “Ainsley, I don’t know what to do. Reverend Peck has gone way over his allotted time.” She looked at the table. “Oh no. See? The ice is melting in the tea. And look. The sandwich bites will get soggy.”

“What’s the holdup?”

“He’s just preaching and preaching and preaching. I mean, I’m all for letting God keep me strong while the world around me changes, but people are getting hungry and we have melting ice.”

Ainsley hadn’t heard any of the sermon. She’d been downstairs preparing the food and drinks.

Katelyn rushed to the table. “The fruit is getting too juicy. When fruit just sits, it turns to mush.”

“Why don’t you see what you can do about all this? I’ll be right back.” Ainsley rushed upstairs and entered the sanctuary quietly, taking a seat in the back. The reverend looked like he was still going strong.

“My friends, the world is always going to offer you a choice—several
choices, in fact—of who you want to be. And the world is offering this town a choice of who we want to be. Changes may be coming all around us. It has been true throughout all of history. Things cannot stay as they are. But you are fearfully and wonderfully made, capable of embracing things you fear. After all, isn’t it change that causes us to reach high for answers and at the same time fall on our knees for help? If everything around us remains as it always has, we are never forced to grow.

“When Noah came off the boat, hadn’t his entire life changed? Everything he knew to be true about life was now gone, and he was literally starting over, an entire new earth at his disposal. Yet God said to him, As long as the earth endures, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night will never cease.’ It can seem in life that nothing is sacred. Friendships come and go. People die, people are born. There is health, and then there is sickness. Life is prosperous one moment, destitute the next. You are favored, and then you are scorned. But one thing never changes, and that is God. And His promises stand true. As long as the earth is spinning around, the seasons will come, reminding us that life changes. Just as it is true in the seasons, change has its purpose. We may not understand it now, but if we stand with the One who does not change, we will make it through any season in our life. And that is a promise as sure as the rainbow in the sky.”

Reverend Peck took in a deep breath and stepped back from the podium, pulling off the gadget attached to his head. Suddenly the crowd erupted in applause. Ainsley’s throat swelled tight with emotion, and she wiped away grateful tears. She stared down at that stupid hemline she’d been obsessing about all morning and let out a laugh. Then she felt a hand on her shoulder.

“Hey, are you okay?” Wolfe stood above her. She rose and hugged him.

“Yeah. I’m good. These are tears of relief, believe me. Can you herd
the crowd downstairs for the refreshments? I want to go talk to the reverend.”

“Sure.”

Ainsley walked up an end aisle to avoid the crowd and try to catch the reverend, who was headed to his office. She hurried her steps. “Reverend. Reverend, wait.”

He turned. “Ainsley.”

“Reverend, I just wanted to thank you.”

Ainsley noticed his hands were trembling as they held a picture book of Noah’s ark.

“Are you okay, Reverend?”

“A little shaken up. I’ve never done that before.” He looked at her. “At the last minute, I decided to change my sermon. As I was going up there. Right at the very moment I stepped behind the podium, I set my sermon aside. I’d intended to preach a sermon on …”

“On what?”

He smiled a little. “Something comfortable. Anyway, my dear, I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

“No, Reverend, you don’t understand. It wasn’t an enjoyable sermon.”

“It wasn’t?”

“What I mean is that it helped me. It was a hard thing to do to stand up there and say things that aren’t popular, but you did it, and because of it, I now know it’s okay to be me. I can be a part of change and still be myself, all at the same time.”

The reverend smiled, and then looked behind Ainsley to find a line of people formed, waiting to talk to him. Ainsley noticed it too.

“Now that’s quite a change,” he laughed.

Wolfe was admiring the mural on the wall—although he had an entirely new view of the ark and all its various smells now—while enjoying one of Ainsley’s famous brownies. But even her perfect brownies couldn’t distract him from the burden that Butch had laid on him. Oliver had made it obvious he didn’t want to be near Wolfe by moving to the opposite side of the room. But if he could tell Oliver that the snake was not in his house, he might at least defuse some of the conflict.

Butch’s warning seemed completely stupid, and Wolfe was growing tired of these antics. His family still apparently wanted to buy into all these tall tales. But what good was that doing Butch? Somebody needed to tell him to be himself, that he didn’t need to create these lies to make himself look better, no matter what level of elusive talents he had.

He turned to find Oliver across the room. He was standing by Melb eating a plateful of food. Sure, the last time he’d gotten Oliver involved, things had turned south, despite Butch’s warning to keep it confidential. But that had really been out of his control.

He needed to tell Oliver. Just for everyone’s sanity. He would ask Oliver to keep it quiet, and no harm would be done.

“Where you going?”

Wolfe turned to find Leonard Tarffeski standing behind him holding a cup of punch. He smiled like they were old buddies. Tarffeski turned his attention toward Oliver, across the room. “You’ve been staring at that guy like he was somebody important. Is he?”

“Just a friend.”

“We haven’t been formally introduced.” Tarffeski said. He held out his hand. “Call me Leonard.” Wolfe shook it quickly. “And you’re Wolfe Boone. I’m not a big reader, but everybody knows who you are.” He sipped his punch. “So I haven’t caught that snake yet.”

“Is that so?”

“I wouldn’t still be hanging around if I had.”

“Any leads?”

“A couple.” He looked across the room at Oliver again. “I think some people are hiding some things.”

“Why would anybody hide anything? Everyone wants this snake caught.”

“Maybe a few people have found out it’s value. Maybe you have.”

“No amount of money is going to make that snake adorable, let me assure you,” Wolfe said. “This town just wants it back in the hands of it’s owner.”

“Dustin.”

“Yes.”

“The true ownership of that snake may be up for dispute, but I won’t go into that now. However, if you know anything at all about it’s whereabouts, you should tell me. This snake has been aggravated and taken out of it’s element. I’m sure it’s unhappy, and unhappy snakes are not fun to be around. Especially when they have two heads.”

“I find it hard to believe that you would come all the way from New Zealand just to hunt a snake.”