Blue Twilight (8 page)

Chapter 17

Watching Jake wander around her studio was a surreal moment in Lisa’s life. Her boyfriend, country music super star, Ryder, was in
her
studio and wanted to record one of
her
songs.

“The acoustics in here are amazing,” he said running his hand over the keys on the piano and singing a few lines of one of his most popular songs.

When he launched into a description of all the extra equipment he could bring in, Lisa barely heard him. Her mind had been reduced to mush after hearing him sing. She pinched herself, still not convinced she wasn’t dreaming.

“Ouch,” she cried, rubbing her arm.

“What’s the matter?” he asked turning to face her.

“It’s just so crazy,” she gushed. “A week ago I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone, and now here I am…and it’s with
you
.”

Winking at her, he shook his head slightly. “I’m just a man, angel.” He crossed the room and drew her into his arms.
“Your man if you’ll have me,”
he sang in his sultry voice.

Yep, mush.
A girl could really get used to this.

***

Holding Lisa in his arms, Jake could easily forget why he ever thought having this beautiful woman was a bad idea. Lisa sighed and rested her head on his shoulder. Kissing the top of her head, he sang quietly in her ear.

“
Denied yourself for so long

Your heart so jaded

It can’t even recognize right from wrong…”

Lisa gazed at him with vacant eyes and a wistful smile.

Laughing quietly, Jake realized he held a secret weapon. And damn if he didn’t feel ten feet tall for rendering her speechless. But, it scared him that he wanted to make her feel this way all the time—that he wanted to be the one to make her dreams come true.
Focus on the here and now,
he reminded himself. Shaking himself a bit, he dipped Lisa low before snapping her back up into his arms. She laughed as he spun her around the room. And just like that, she captured his full attention again.

***

Six weeks passed as Lisa continued to work and grow closer with Jake. As promised, he’d brought some recording equipment into the studio, and they worked down there for hours most days.

One afternoon, Lisa came home from the bakery and changed before heading to the studio. Jake had a meeting in Nashville and wouldn’t be back until later that evening. After playing around with a few ideas, they had both decided that
Blue Twilight
seemed to hold the most promise.

Sitting at the piano, she ran her fingers over the keys as she contemplated lyrics. Would it be a tragic, love-lost song or an upbeat, happy-ever-after one? With country, it could go either way and still be a hit. It was never far from her mind that her relationship with Jake could still go either way as well. Things had been great these past few weeks, but she wasn’t ready to picture a happy-ever-after ending for them. Not yet. Turning back to her notebook, she hummed a few lines before scribbling down some notes. The thought of any of her songs being a hit made Lisa giddy. An idea struck and she grinned as she wrote it all down. As she read over it again, she bounced in her seat with excitement. She couldn’t wait to show Jake what she’d come up with.

***

Fifty miles up the road, Jake loosened his tie and pressed down on the accelerator. He couldn’t wait to get home. If he were being completely honest, he couldn’t wait to get to Lisa. Funny how the two seemed to be intertwined now in his mind. Scowling a bit at the thought, he focused on the meeting he’d just finished with his record executives. They’d finalized the track list for his upcoming album and he’d made sure
Blue Twilight
had received top billing. Glancing at the roses next to him, he hoped she’d be excited when he told her.

When his phone rang on the seat next to him, he connected the Bluetooth. Hoping it was Lisa, he didn’t bother to check the caller ID. “Hello?”

“I was just wondering if you’d had time to consider our latest offer.”

Jake felt his blood run cold. “You’re crazy if you think I’d ever agree to that. My offer was more than fair, and it stands. I want this taken care of.”

“Then give me what I want.”

Gripping the steering wheel tight, he growled. “That’s not going to happen.”

“Have it your way.” The line went dead, and he hit the wheel a few times.

With a curse, he connected his hands free device again and made another call.

The miles raced by and before he knew it, he was ending his call and pulling into Lisa’s driveway. He tried his best to let go of the anger, but he could feel it vibrating through him. Jake grabbed the bouquet and stalked to the front door. After knocking a few times, he tried the knob and found it unlocked. He knew she was home because her car was in the drive.

“Lisa?” Her unique jasmine scent hit him as he walked into the living room. It wrapped around him and helped ease some of the tension from his shoulders. After a quick check of the kitchen, he realized where she must be. Making his way downstairs, he stood at the studio door and watched her for a minute. Lisa alternated between playing a few notes on the piano and writing in her book. Still unnoticed, he stood and admired her. She stole his breath, even when wearing baggy sweat pants and an old Naval Academy t-shirt. He smiled as she blew the hair out of her face and scratched out something she’d just written. Setting the pen down, she stretched her arms above her head. As she turned to get a water bottle off of the desk behind her, she spotted Jake staring at her.

With a scream, she nearly fell off the piano bench. “Jake, you scared the crap out of me! What are you doing back so early?”

Holding out the roses, he explained. “We finished early, and I couldn’t wait to get back to you.”

Her eyes softened as she crossed the room to accept the bouquet. “They’re beautiful,” she said giving him a kiss. “Thank you. I’ll have to find a vase for them.”

“You’re welcome,” he murmured as she held the peach roses to her face and inhaled.
She is so beautiful
. Good and honest, she was everything he needed.
Everything I’m not
. He watched as she puttered around the studio in her bare feet and chattered about her day. Barely hearing a word she said, he simply watched her. Jake couldn’t imagine not hearing this every day. Couldn’t fathom not seeing her frustrated and blowing the hair from her face. Everything in his life was better, brighter with Lisa in it. Shock rippled through him when he realized what it all meant.

“Are you listening to anything I’m saying?” Lisa asked with a grin.

Turning his wide eyes on her, he shook his head. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Are you okay?” she asked, taking his hand. He watched her forehead wrinkle in concern. “You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

He yanked his hand away and took several steps back. He needed to get out of there. Panic gripped him for a few moments before he finally managed an answer. “No. “I…I’m not feeling so great, I think.”

Worry clouded Lisa’s features. “Do you want to go lay down? I could make you some soup.”

Backing up further, he held his hands out.
Almost there.
“Actually, I think maybe I’d better head home. I don’t want to get you sick.”

“Oh, okay.”

Jake hated seeing the disappointment on her face. He almost gave in and told her he’d stay. It astounded him how far he was willing to go to make her happy.

“You sure you’re alright?” She asked again.

No!
He wanted to shout. Of course he wasn’t alright. Instead he stepped forward and kissed her cheek softly. “I’m sure. I’ll see you later.” Spinning on his heel, he ran up the basement stairs before he could see the hurt in her blue eyes.

Instead of driving home, he turned toward town. He was on auto pilot as he pulled in front of the bakery. Debra was just locking up for the day when she spotted him. Rolling his window down, he gave a small wave.

“Hey, handsome!” she greeted. “Hank said the meeting got done early. He said things went really well and…what’s wrong?”

He didn’t even have it in him to pretend. “I have to take off for a while.”

Sighing, she crouched down beside his window. “Jake, what happened?”

Unable to meet her eyes, he said, “You were right…about everything. I never should have gotten involved. I-I think I love her,” he choked out. Saying it out loud only intensified his feelings, and he groaned.

Placing her hands through the window, she gently covered his on the wheel. “What are you going to do?”

“I feel like I should run,” he whispered, leaning his head back against the seat. “Get as far away from her as possible.”

“And where would you go? Deep down, you know what you have to do.”

“I know.” Jake sighed. As much as he hated it, he knew.

“Did you tell her?”

“That I loved her?” At Debra’s nod, he continued, “No, I ran like hell as soon as I realized it.”

Debra winced. “Jake, she’s going to figure things out…”

He was desperate. Jake wasn’t ready to face what loving her meant, but he was unable to let her go. “Can you just tell her I had something come up and that I’ll be back in a few days?”

Looking like she was going to try and change his mind, Debra finally shook her head before agreeing. “I can. Where are you headed?”

He slipped his sunglasses on and squeezed her hand once. “North,” is all he said before pulling away into the late afternoon sun.

Chapter 18

Lisa called Jake later that night, but he didn’t answer. Leaving a quick message, she couldn’t shake the feeling something was wrong. It intensified when she checked her phone in the morning and still hadn’t heard from him. It proved true when she arrived at work the following morning.

Debra informed her Jake had to leave unexpectedly. “He had to meet some people to take care of stuff on the new album,” she’d said vaguely.

“So, Hank went too?” she asked holding on to one last piece of hope.

When Debra merely shook her head, Lisa could almost feel a hole open in her battered heart.

Lisa’s lip trembled, but she refused to do this at work. Straightening her spine, she grabbed her apron and looked Deb in the eye. “Let’s get to work.”

The next few days, she fell into a routine. She got up, she went to work, and she came home. Knowing he wouldn’t call didn’t make it any easier when he didn’t. Unable to bring herself to go into the studio, she spent most nights curled on her couch. It wouldn’t have mattered even if she could have forced herself down to the basement. The music had left her. Her solace for so long had abandoned her. But she refused to cry, afraid that if she started she may never stop.

By the time Thursday rolled around, she felt hollow inside. Rain was currently soaking the entire town, matching her mood. People ran past the bakery, seeking the refuge of their cars or homes. Time dragged by as her thoughts turned dark. Why had she ever thought she could keep someone like Jake? Lisa tried to be angry. Angry at Jake for lying to her, and for breaking his promise. She tried to be angry with herself for putting her trust in him, but her sorrow overrode any other feeling. A single tear escaped and slipped down her cheek before she could wipe it away.

“Why don’t you get out of here?” Debra asked softly behind her. “This rain isn’t going to let up anytime soon, and it’s been quiet all morning. I can handle things.”

For once, Lisa didn’t even try to argue. With shaking hands, she untied her apron and dropped it in the hamper before grabbing her purse. She opened the door and stepped into the storm. Leaning her head back, she let the rain wash her tears away.

***

Across the street, Jake watched from his car as Lisa stood in the rain. He wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and apologize, to kiss away every one of her tears. More than anything, he wished he could explain. His patience was running out, and he didn’t know how much longer he could stay away before he lost her for good. He studied her beautiful features for another minute before quickly pulling away.

***

Shivering, Lisa let herself into the house. After taking a long, hot shower, she slipped into her most comfortable pajamas and grabbed ice cream from the freezer. Settling on the couch, she had just started on her pint of frozen comfort when the doorbell rang. With a sigh, she rose and walked to the hallway. She was so not in the mood for company.

Opening the door, she blinked in surprise. “Mom?”

“Surprise, Sweets!”

Still holding the spoon to her mouth, Lisa could only stare in shock. Finally, her common sense kicked in. “Mom, what are you doing here?”

“I came to see you, silly,” said her mom as she shook out her umbrella. “Now are you going to let me in or are am I going to have to stand out here and get soaked?”

Lisa pulled her mother inside and hugged her like she’d never let go.

“Honey, are you okay?”

“I’m just so glad to see you,” Lisa gushed as she allowed herself to be enveloped in her mother’s embrace.

After a quick tour of the house, Lisa wandered into the kitchen to make some coffee. She pulled two cups from the cabinet, filled them, and added sugar to her mom’s liking. Sitting at the table across from her, Lisa studied her mom. At fifty two, Karen James was a force to be reckoned with. Her long, dark hair held no hint of grey, and her clear hazel eyes still twinkled. Looking closer, Lisa realized her mom looked different. Not in an obvious way, but something was off and she couldn’t put her finger on it. She was practically glowing.

Lisa set her cup aside. “So, what are you doing here, Mom?”

Sipping her coffee, Karen gestured with her other hand. “I missed you, Sweets. I’ve barely heard from you since you came down here.”

Lisa hid a grimace behind her mug. She’d meant to call her mom more, but she’d been busy with Jake. Just the thought of him made her eyes sting. Clearing her throat, she tried to hide her tears. “I’m sorry, Mom. I’ve just been…busy.”

She didn’t miss the calculated way her mother stared at her. And since her mom was never one to beat around the bush, she wasn’t surprised when she heard, “So, last I heard, you were starting to date that guy down the street. How’s that going?”

Lisa didn’t want to talk about this.  How could she ever explain things to her mom? She barely understood them herself. Holding her mom’s gaze, it was finally too much and she burst into tears.

When she felt her mother’s arms around her a moment later, she finally let go. All of the pain she’d been trying to hold inside came rushing out in a tidal wave of tears.

After the sobs had reduced to hiccups, Karen handed Lisa a tissue. “You want to talk about it?”

Lisa lay her head on the table with a groan. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” she said miserably.

Returning to her seat, Karen reached across to hold Lisa’s hand. “Try me.”

After a deep breath, she told her mom everything. Lisa had to hand it to her mom. She never batted an eyelash, even when she explained who Jake really was. Shredding her tissue, Lisa detailed things up until a few days ago. “And then he just disappeared. Debra said it was for business, but I don’t believe it…not really. And he hasn’t called…” She put her head down again. “Listen to me.” She sniffled. “I sound pathetic.”

“No,” her mom interrupted. “You’re confused, and you’re hurt. I think you really like him, Sweets.”

As much as Lisa wanted to disagree, she couldn’t. The past weeks she’d spent with Jake had been the happiest she’d ever had. Looking back, she couldn’t ever remember feeling even close to what she felt for Jake with Eric. And if she’d thought Eric was
the one
, then that could only mean…
holy crap.

“I think it’s more than that,” she whispered as the realization hit her. “I think…I think I love him. How is that possible? I’ve only known him for six weeks! We said we were going to take things slow. I haven’t even slept with him yet!” The blush crept over her as she remembered too late who she was talking to.

Losing herself to her thoughts, she remembered the way Jake had put her fears to rest.

“Angel, I’m not going anywhere. You said you wanted slow, and that’s fine. There’s no rush. You’re worth the wait.” And he’d kissed her so there was no room for doubt…

But clearly, she
wasn’t
worth the wait. Pain squeezed her heart once more as she turned back to her mom to mumble, “It’ll never work, anyway. I’m nobody compared to him.”

Karen’s eyes flashed. “You are not nobody, Lisa Nicole! Don’t you ever let me hear you talk about yourself that way.” Sighing as she calmed down, she continued, “And when you know you love someone, you just… know. I knew I loved your father in six days.”

“Yeah, and look how well that turned out for you,” Lisa said bitterly.

Karen rolled her eyes. “You’re right, but that’s because he wasn’t the one.”

After pausing, Lisa let that sink in. Her mom did seem much happier now with Richard. But it was ridiculous to think along these lines. Jake had left, so he couldn’t be her “one”.
Could he?

As if hearing her thoughts, her mom continued. “Sweets, I can’t tell you if Jake is who you are meant to be with. The only one who can answer that question is you. When he comes home, you’re just going to have to talk to him. But for the record, you are a smart, beautiful, and wonderful young woman. He’d be damn lucky to have you.”

Lisa’s eyes filled once more. “I’m glad you’re here, Mom.”

“Me too, Sweets. Me too.”

That evening, as Lisa was putting dinner together, her mom filled her in on things that had been going on with her life.

Stirring some gravy, Lisa said, “So, I was thinking I might come up for a visit in the next couple months.”

“How about in December?”

Reaching behind her for the pepper, she said, “Sure, for Christmas?” After giving it a healthy sprinkle, she grabbed a spoon from the drawer and gave the gravy a taste.

After tasting the spoonful Lisa held out, her mom said, “Well, I was actually hoping you’d come up a few days before Christmas…for the wedding.”

“Who’s getting married?” Lisa asked as she gave the gravy another stir.

Karen laughed nervously and wrung her hands. “I am.”

“What?” Lisa dropped the spoon into the gravy. Rushing around the counter, she grabbed her mom in an enthusiastic hug. “You’re getting married?”

“I think I am,” said Karen with a smile.

“Mom, that’s wonderful! I’m so happy for you!” She adored Richard and was so glad her mom had found him.

Wiping her eyes, her mom said, “I guess my timing could have been better, but I just had to tell you, Sweets.”

“Your timing was perfect,” said Lisa as she wiped her own tears away. “You deserve to be happy, Mom.”

“You know, we’ve got to stop all this crying,” Karen said patting Lisa’s hand.

“I know,” Lisa said. “Let’s go out and celebrate!”

“But you’ve already started…” Karen trailed off as she saw the forgotten spoon now floating in the gravy. “Let me just go change,” she said with a laugh.

Turning off the stove, Lisa ran upstairs to get dressed. She pulled on a dress and grabbed a sweater after seeing that it was still pouring outside. As she brushed her hair, her mom called out that she’d wait downstairs.

***

After pacing up and down the street five times, Jake found himself standing on Lisa’s front step. He was no closer to figuring things out, but he couldn’t stay away any longer. Knowing that she was just on the other side of the door killed him. As far as he was concerned, any distance between them was too far. Jake knew he didn’t deserve her forgiveness, but he was going to ask for it anyway.

With a deep breath, he knocked twice. His hands shook, causing the sunflower he held to tremble, but they weren’t shaking from the cold. After a moment, the door opened, but it wasn’t Lisa who answered.

Momentarily confused, Jake took in the features of the woman standing before him. It hit him when he saw her eyes. They were the wrong color, but the shape and even the laugh lines surrounding them, were familiar.
This must be Lisa’s mother.

“I beg your pardon, ma’am,” he finally said. “I didn’t realize that Lisa had company. I’ll come back later.”

Jake watched as she appraised him. He realized how he must look. His saturated clothes clung to him, and the sunflower he’d bought looked like a wilted, sad version of its name. But even still, she grabbed him by the arm and pulled him into the front hall. “Nonsense, come get out of the rain.” Shooting him another glance that appeared both glacial and interested at the same time, she guessed, “You must be Jake.”

Cringing, Jake could only imagine what she’d heard about him. But he deserved it, all of it. After attempting to wipe his hand on soggy jeans he held it out to her. “And you must be Lisa’s mother. It’s a pleasure to meet you, ma’am.”

Without hesitation, she placed her hand in his. “Karen James. I’ve heard a lot about you, Jake.”

How can mothers always pack so much into that simple statement?
“I imagine so, ma’am,” he said sullenly. “I want to apologize—”

Karen cut him off with a pat to his hand. “You save that for my daughter. She’s the one that needs to hear it.”

And as if speaking about her conjured her out of thin air, Lisa descended the stairs calling out, “Mom, was that the door I heard?” She stopped as she saw him. He watched as she clenched her hands at her sides and asked, “What are you doing here, Jake?”

There she is. My angel.
He let out a breath. Being around her calmed him like nothing else could.

“I’m just going to grab another cup of coffee,” Karen said as she made her way toward the kitchen. “It was nice to meet you, Jake,” she called over her shoulder.

“You too,” Jake whispered. He couldn’t take his gaze off of Lisa. She was dressed in a cream-colored dress covered in pink roses that matched the flush currently in her cheeks. Her long hair hung in loose waves around her shoulders. And her eyes…even though they looked as angry as a summer storm, they were still the most beautiful set he’d ever seen.

Chest heaving, Lisa asked again, “What are you doing here?”

“I…I wanted to see you. To let you know that I was back.” He knew how weak he sounded, but it was all he had. Crossing to her, he held out the wilted flower. “You look beautiful,” he murmured.

He let his hand linger over hers as she reached out to clutch the flower. Clearing her throat, she said “Well, now I know. If you’ll excuse me, my mom and I were just heading out.”