Blue Twilight (7 page)

Her heart thundered in her chest, and she was growing more apprehensive by the second.

As if he were able to hear her thoughts, he kissed her hand and whispered, “Please trust me.”

Lisa recalled her promise to give him a chance and reluctantly nodded once more.

“Close your eyes. Don’t open them until I tell you, okay? I’m getting something from the truck, and I’ll be right back.”

Her earlier apprehension was now being chased by full-scale panic. What in the hell was this about? “Jake, I—”

“Please,” he pleaded. “Do this for me, angel.”

Blowing a piece of hair out of her face, she tried to calm her fears. He wasn’t going to hurt her. She knew that. Giving in, she sighed before finally letting her eyes flutter closed.

“Thank you,” he breathed over her lips as he kissed her gently. “I’ll be right back.”

She felt the blanket shift as he stood and heard his footsteps when he walked to the truck. Digging her nails into her palm, she forced herself to keep her eyes closed as she heard him close the bed of his truck and begin walking back to her. Her heart pounded as she felt the blanket move with his return. She heard two clicks and then a sound that she never expected.

Chapter 15

Jake knew what he was risking. He knew he was taking a huge chance on a girl he’d just met, but he wanted her to know. And wasn’t that the damndest thing? After spending so much of his time hiding who he really was, he was excited to share this with her. He tuned his guitar and prayed he was making the right decision. When he finished, he touched her cheek. “Open your eyes, angel.”

And then he sang:

Sitting here on a night like this;

With a million stars up in the sky; I close my eyes and make a wish

I open them and all I see is you

And suddenly realize my every wish came true

You are my reason to be,

You mean everything to me

I want to be all that and more for you

‘Cause, baby, you are my every wish come true

I could search the world over and never find another

To give me this spark, to satisfy every desire

Some call it fate and I would have to agree

Because I know you were somewhere wishing for me

You are my reason to be

You mean everything to me

I want to be all that and more for you

‘Cause baby, you are my every wish come true

I never thought I’d be able to catch a star

But one caught me, right around my heart

You are my every reason to be

Darling, you know you mean everything to me

I want to be all that and so much more for you

‘Cause baby, you’ve always been my every wish come true

Letting the last note drift away, Jake finished and took a deep breath.

***

As she sat there, Lisa struggled to find words that would not come.
That voice
. She’d recognize that voice anywhere. She’d had his CD on repeat for months. Breathing heavily, she attempted to speak. “You…you’re…holy shit.” She had to get out of there. Standing, she quickly broke into a run.

Behind her, she heard Jake throw the guitar down and race after her. “Wait! Lisa, where are you going? Talk to me, please.”

Talk to him? How in the hell was she supposed to talk to him now? She ran until her lungs screamed and her legs gave out. As she sank onto the grass, she felt him crouch next to her. Tears filled her eyes. “Why didn’t you just tell me?” she asked without looking at him.

Still breathing hard from their run, Jake countered. “Would you have believed me if I had?”

Would she? She wasn’t entirely sure, but he should have given her that chance from the start. Why all of the secrecy? With a shake of her head, she realized she was a fool.
Fool me once
, she thought bitterly. Standing, she began walking toward what she hoped was the road.

Jogging behind her, Jake grabbed her shoulder. “Would you stop? Where are you going to go? You gonna walk home?”

And just like that, her sadness gave way to blinding fury. Jerking out of his hold, she faced him with fire, instead of tears, in her eyes. “If it means I don’t have to stay around a liar anymore, then yes!”

His eyes flashed. “A liar? I may not have told you everything about me, but you know me, Lisa. The real me. Everything I said to you, everything I did was nothing but sincere.”

With a snort, she turned on her heel and started walking again. Calling over her shoulder, she said, “Believe whatever you want, Jake. But this? You and me? We’re done.”

He caught up to her once more and spun her, keeping his arms circled around her waist. “Damn it, woman! Will you just wait a minute? You don’t understand…”

Oh, he has some nerve.
Pushing him away, she gestured with her hands as she shouted, “Oh please,
enlighten me then,
Jake! Make me feel sorry for the
famous Ryder
.”

Jake’s emerald eyes darkened to almost black, and Lisa took a step back. Perhaps it hadn’t been the best idea to incite him that way.

In a bitter voice, he pointed a finger at her and said, “You want to know what it’s like? Fine, let me ‘
enlighten
’ you. How would you like to have a microphone or a camera shoved in your face every second of every day? How would you like to see stories printed daily about your life that may or may not be the truth? Would you want every private, personal detail of your life laid out for everyone to see and criticize?” He paused and took a deep breath. “When I saw what it was truly going to be like, when I got that first taste of fame, I hated it. I didn’t want it to change me, to jade me. So, I did things my way. I hired Hank as my manager, and he helped me negotiate things on my terms. Very few people outside of our little town know I’m Ryder. And yes, I go to great lengths to keep it that way. I’m damn lucky to have grown up in a small town. I’m lucky that we take care of our own. All I ever wanted to do was sing. The rest of it never mattered to me.” With an angry laugh, he gestured to himself. “Hell, look at me! Look at the house I live in. Look at the truck I drive. Do I look like someone who cares about money? About fame?” Running his hands through his hair, he finally turned away from her.

Well, he’d done it
, Lisa thought. He’d made her feel sorry for him. Guilt began to gnaw at her, but something still didn’t add up… “Why couldn’t you just tell me up front?”

Turning, he blushed and looked down. “I had to be certain I could trust you.”

“And after four days, you’re certain now?”

“Yes,” he said simply.

Lisa didn’t know how to process that. How could he possibly be that sure of her? She couldn’t even begin to think about him being who he really was or she’d break out in hives. She’d tuck that away for a future breakdown. The real question was what now? Sighing, she headed back toward the truck.

After gathering their things, Jake threw them in the back and leaned against the truck next to Lisa. “What are you thinking?” he asked quietly.

Blowing the hair out of her face, she answered honestly. “I don’t know, Jake. Do I even call you Jake? Or should I call you Ryder?” She couldn’t hide the bitterness in her voice.

“I’m always Jake,” he whispered sadly. “I don’t know how to be anyone else.”

She considered that for a moment as she watched the sun start its slow descent. But before they left, she had to know one last thing. “Why me? You could have anyone in the world you want.”

His answer was instant. “Because the only one I want is you.” Opening her door, he helped her inside before climbing into the driver’s seat.

Lisa felt a tug on her heart. She could forgive him for not telling her who he really is. She didn’t have to like it, but she could understand his reasons. Lisa felt as though they were at a tipping point. Could she really open herself up to something like this again? She knew she could no longer test the waters, so to speak. There would be no further wading into the water until she grew accustomed to it. She was either all in, cannon-ball jump, or not.

Chapter 16

Jake couldn’t believe how badly things had gone. He’d known she would be surprised, but he’d kind of hoped that once the shock wore off she would be excited, happy even. Now he had no idea where they stood. He regretted losing his temper when he’d tried to make her understand why he kept his life hidden. The woman really did drive him crazy. Smiling sadly, he glanced over and hoped this was not the last time he’d get to spend time with her. But, he knew the decision was hers. He’d said and done what he could but ultimately, the rest was up to her. Pulling into her driveway, he cut the engine and grabbed her music box from the back seat. When she didn’t make a move to get out, he silently hoped she’d at least invite him inside to talk. He decided to push his luck as he got out and went to open her door. As soon as he did, Lisa launched herself into his arms. Not expecting it, he tumbled backwards, taking her with him.

“Are you alright?” he asked as he laid her on the grass and checked her for injuries. Lisa, he noted, was laughing hysterically. When he realized she was fine, he scrunched his nose as he asked, “What the hell was that?”

“Cannon ball,” she whispered right before pulling his mouth to hers.

Jake’s surprise gave way to warmth as he drew her closer and deepened the kiss. Losing himself, he wrapped a hand in her hair as his tongue met hers. Her soft moan met his ears, and Jake had never heard anything sweeter. Their perfect, intimate bubble was suddenly burst as a car drove by. The driver was leaning on the horn and yelling suggestions about getting a room.

Quickly sitting up, Lisa brushed a hand across her mouth. “Oops.” She grinned. Wiggling out from under him, she stood and held her hand out to him. “Would you like to come inside?”

“Give me just a minute,” Jake said lying back on the cool grass. He shut his eyes and heard Lisa giggle above him. Smiling, he peered up at her. “Hey, angel?”

“Yes?”

“I like cannon balls.”

Lisa laughed as she pulled him up and gave him another quick kiss. He didn’t think he’d ever get enough of this beautiful, exasperating woman.

***

Later, they were curled up on Lisa’s couch with Chinese take-out containers between them. “Not to push my luck,” Jake began as he pushed his aside “But what made you change your mind about me…about us?”

Taking one last bite of lo mein, Lisa considered his question. “I don’t think I needed to change my mind,” she said honestly. “Once I got past the shock, I thought about things on the drive home.” Pausing, she sipped her diet soda before continuing. “You surprised me, and while I wish you had just told me up front, I understand why you didn’t.” Taking a deep breath, she gathered her courage. “The truth is, I really like you, Jake. You took a huge chance revealing your secret to me, and now I’m ready to take a chance on you…on us.”

Jake crossed an ankle over his knee. “Just like that?”

“Well, no,” she admitted, tucking her feet beneath her. She blew a few stray hairs out of her face. “I told you, it’s not easy for me to trust you—well, not just you, but anyone. But with you…I don’t know. I think I’m ready to stop living in the past. There’s just something about you that makes it worth the risk.” Lisa had never laid her heart out like this before and even though it terrified her, she was excited to take this leap. “And it has nothing to do with you being Ryder,” she quickly clarified. “I like
you
, Jake.”

Leaning over, he took her hand as his gaze met hers. “I like you too, angel. More than I care to admit.” He made a move to kiss her, but Lisa put her hand up.

“But,” she interrupted, “we need to take this slow. I need some time to…adjust—to get to know you better.”

Jake flipped her hand over and kissed her palm. “I understand.”

Ignoring the butterflies currently taking flight in her stomach, she decided to go for broke. “Can I ask you for something then?”

“Anything.”

Here goes nothing.
“Just don’t lie to me,” Lisa said softly, looking down. “If you find that you don’t want me anymore—”

“I don’t see that happening,” Jake cut in with a smile.

“Just tell me,” she continued. “But
please
, no more lies, no more secrets.” Holding her breath, she waited for his answer.

“I promise.”

She glanced up at the crack in his voice. But before she could ask him about it, he drew her into his arms and kissed her senseless. Any questions she had wanted to ask were scattered to the far corners of her mind.

Later, Jake had her snuggled against him as he kissed behind her ear. “So, I guess this makes you my girlfriend, huh?” he asked in a husky voice.

She could practically see her subconscious doing cartwheels over the title, but no way she’d let him know that. “What are you, twelve?” she asked with a giggle.

He chuckled as he nipped her earlobe. “Twenty-seven, actually.” Pushing her away, he crossed his arms and pretended to pout. “Does that mean you don’t want to be my girlfriend?”

Lisa put a finger to her chin as she pretended to debate it. Smiling, she finally conceded. “Well, I guess…but only if you answer a question for me.”

“Ask me anything, angel.”

Bouncing in her seat, she glanced up at him through her eyelashes. “When’s your next CD coming out?”

Jake laughed and lunged for her. He tickled her sides as he teased her in a high voice “Oh my God, it’s
Ryder
! Can I have your autograph?”

When he finally released her and the giggles subsided, she grabbed her soda from the table. “But seriously, any plans?” Taking a sip, she waited with baited breath for his answer.

“I’m not sure. How soon can you help me get started?”

Wait…what?!
Choking on her soda, she began to cough violently.

Jake hit her back until her coughs subsided. “Are you alright?”

Still breathing heavily, she wheezed out, “You can’t be serious.”

As he leaned back, Jake shook his head. “Angel, didn’t we already establish that I think you’re incredibly talented?”

Lisa blew the hair out of her face as her heart raced. “But you…I…can’t…” Putting her head between her legs, she took deep breaths trying to keep the panic at bay.

Kneeling in front of her, Jake pulled her head up. “You can,” he said emphatically. “I believe in you.”

To have anyone believe in her writing was amazing. But to have the biggest country music star in the world believe in her? That was the stuff dreams were made of. In theory, it should be the easiest thing in the world for her to agree. Write a song with her favorite singer for his new album?
Yes, please!
But as quickly as the thought came, another chased it away.
What if they couldn’t work together?
Was she willing to lose her newfound relationship with Jake over it?

Tapping her head, Jake said “I can practically see the wheels turning up here. Tell me what you’re thinking so hard about.”

Lisa gnawed on her lip. “What if we can’t work together? What happens then?”

“It won’t come between us,” he promised. “I won’t let it.”

Still unconvinced, she asked, “How can you be so sure?”

After sitting down next to her, he pulled her onto his lap and explained. “When I decided to take Hank on as my manager, we’d already been friends for years. We don’t always see eye to eye, but at the end of the day, I trust him to do what’s best for me. It’d be the same for us. We may not always agree on everything, but you will just have to put some faith in me and know that I’ll do everything I can to get your songs heard.”

How could she possibly argue with that? With a deep breath, she asked one more time. “Are you absolutely sure about this?”

Hugging her close, he whispered in her ear. “Without a doubt, angel. I’m one hundred percent sure.”

She let the joy spread through her body before jumping up and pulling his hand. “Then come with me, I have something to show you.”