Blind Side Of Love (10 page)

“He promised me that he–”

“He promised you! Are you that stupid, Becca? You know better than to believe that!”

“Look, Dad, I’m sorry if Jordan can’t be trusted to be left alone in the house at seventeen years old. But I shouldn’t have to be his babysitter that makes sure that he behaves himself all the time. Maybe you need to take up whatever issues he’s having with him and not me. I’m sick of being lectured over his mistakes!” I shouted, surprising myself a little. I never raised my voice to my dad.

“Who do you think you are speaking to in that tone?” He inched closer to me. “What, do you think you can talk to your father anyway you want now because you’re out whoring around with that boy?”

My heart dropped over his words. “Jeff, that’s enough!” my mother shouted. Tears filled my eyes and I could see his eyes filling with emotion as well as I stared into them. He glared at me one last time before walking into his study and slamming the door.             

After I helped my mother clean up, I decided to swallow my pride and make amends with my father. "Hey," I said as I knocked lightly on his study door. He barely lifted his head as I placed the cup of coffee on his desk. I took a seat and looked around at all of my artwork hanging on the walls, some of it dating back to when I was three years old. "So, when did you want to reschedule our tennis match?"

"I don't know right now, Becca. I'm really busy with work."

My eyes filled with tears. "I'm still the same girl, Daddy. I'm still your Becca."
He had a pained expression as he looked into my eyes. "My Becca never lied. She never made stupid mistakes."

“I didn’t make a stupid mistake, Dad. What are you talking about?”

“Sleeping with the first guy that gives you any attention.”

“That’s not true, Dad! I’m a twenty one year old woman. Most girls my age have been having sex since they were sixteen, so how dare you say that to me!”

“You’re not like most girls, Becca! You have the whole world at your fingertips and you’re throwing it away over a guy.”

“How am I throwing my life away over a guy? Because I like him and I enjoy spending time with him? How is that throwing my life away?”

“The next thing you know, you’ll be talking about marriage and then having kids and then that’s it!”

“Dad, just calm down. Drew and I have only been dating for three weeks, we are not that serious.”

“But you’re serious enough to be having sex with him?” He looked at me with sheer disappointment.

I looked down at the ground and shook my head. “Dad, he’s just diff–”

He put his hand up to stop me. “I don’t have time for this right now, Becca, I have to finish up here,” he said, putting his head back down into his paperwork.

I swallowed hard, trying my hardest to halt my tears. “I’m sorry for not being here for Jordan last night,” I whispered as I got up from the chair and exited his study. My father and I never fought. I was constantly living up to his high expectations of me. And although I
was
sorry for letting him down with my brother, I would never be sorry for sleeping with Drew…. and for that, I would never apologize.  

I kept to myself the rest of the day, going out of my way to help my mother around the house before spending a few hours by the pool. My father stayed locked in his study for the afternoon and my brother was still passed out in bed while I took the brunt of his punishment.   

"You need some help with that?" I asked my mother as I walked into the kitchen and saw her peeling potatoes for dinner.

"Sure, if you're up to it; grab a knife and start slicing some carrots." She looked up at me and smiled. I smiled back, happy to see that she wasn't giving me the silent treatment as well. I took a seat at the counter stool next to her and wasted no time dicing up the carrots.

"So how was Boston?" I asked.

"Oh you know, hectic as usual, but it was nice to see Lorraine and John again."

I nodded and took a deep breath. "Mom, I'm really sorry for not being here last night. I really thought that Jordan was being sincere."

"That's okay, Becca, it’s not your fault. Your father has to learn that your brother is seventeen years old and has to start bearing the brunt of his mistakes, instead of blaming everyone else for them." She put down the potato that she was peeling and looked at me. "But I am a little hurt that you didn’t share with me just how serious you were becoming with this guy. I mean, your father and I haven't even met him."

"Daddy did meet him the night of the benefit."

"Becca, you know what I mean; we would like to have met him for longer than a minute."

"I'm sorry. I just didn't think Daddy would be very welcoming."

She looked at me and smiled. "Becca, this is all so new to him. You've never had any serious interest in boys before."

"Well, I would love for you guys to get to know him, but I just don't want him feeling uncomfortable."

"You let me take care of your father and I will make sure that doesn't happen."

"Okay," I whispered as I began chopping once again.

"Becca?"

"Yeah," I replied, looking up from my carrots.

"You are still on the pill, right?"

I felt my face turning red. I hated talking about these things with anyone, especially my parents. "Yes, I am."

She nodded. "Well, did you have any questions about....you know?"

I shook my head. "No, Mom, I'm good."

"Okay." She smiled.

“So what’s for dinner?” I asked, trying to break up the awkwardness of the moment.

“London Broil on the grill, mashed potatoes, and fresh vegetables.”

“Oh, can I make my special mashed potatoes?” I asked.

“Sure, knock yourself out,” she replied. My brother strolled into the kitchen and my mother and I both lifted our heads from our chopping and peeling. He opened the refrigerator door to get a drink, looking like he was half dead. “I better go start that grill,” my mother said as she got up and exited the kitchen.

“Becca?”

“What?!” I raised my voice in annoyance.

“I’m sorry if you had to take a lot of crap because of me.”

“What else is new, Jordan? I’m always getting yelled at for
your
mistakes. If you can’t be responsible and trusted, that’s not my problem. You promised me yesterday that you wouldn’t do anything.”

“I know I did and I’m sorry, but Lindsay came over and then her brother and then a few of his friends and then it just kept going from there.”

“And it never once dawned on you to tell these kids to leave?” He looked at me blankly and shrugged his shoulders. “Whatever, Jordan, I just don’t even care anymore.”

“Ready to start those potatoes?” my mother asked as she walked back in, still totally ignoring my brother. He stood in the kitchen for a little while longer before walking out and heading back up the stairs.

My father finally came out of his study when it was time to sit down to dinner. Jordan came downstairs looking somewhat human after taking a shower and I began to wonder what excuse he had given my parents over his black eye. “These potatoes came out delicious, Becca,” my mother said in an effort to break up the silence.

“Thank you,” I whispered as I took a sip of my water.

“So, Jeff, I was telling Becca that we would really like to get to know this boy that she’s been seeing a little better.” I felt my food instantly churning in my stomach. Why did she have to bring this subject up now? My father continued eating, never lifting his head from his plate.  “So, I was thinking next weekend we can have a little barbeque. What do you think?” He finally looked up from his food and glared at her. “Maybe I’ll invite a few other people over so he doesn’t feel awkward,” she continued on, completely ignoring my father’s look of warning. “Becca, ask him if he’s free next Saturday night.” I instantly lost my appetite, just judging by the look on my dad’s face I knew that he wasn’t going to give Drew a fair shot and I didn’t want Drew to have to feel uncomfortable because of it. My only positive in it was that I still had a whole week for my dad to cool down and my mother to work on him, so maybe by Saturday he would at least be a little cordial. I sighed deeply and nodded.

“So Jordan, are you up for some golf with me, Edward, and Ashton tomorrow morning?” my father asked my brother as if nothing ever happened last night.

My brother quickly nodded, knowing that this was his way of escaping further punishment. Tears filled my eyes. I stared at my father, who was making sure that he avoided eye contact with me. My brother was the one that had trashed the house. My brother was the one that was underage drinking with all of his friends. My brother was the one that let him down time and time again. Yet, I was the one getting the silent treatment from him all because I
finally
had a guy in my life.

I got up from the table to clear my plate. “Becca, where are you going? You didn’t even touch your food,” my mother said.

“I lost my appetite,” I said, rinsing off my plate as my father’s eyes finally locked with mine before he looked away without saying a word.

I walked out of the kitchen and upstairs to my bedroom, throwing myself down on my bed. As I checked my messages, there was a missed call from Krista and a text from Lynn Barrett, letting me know that she needed me to run back to Long Island tomorrow morning. I hadn’t heard from Drew since I had left his house that morning which was only adding to my anxiety, especially since I knew who he was with. I grabbed my phone to call Krista back, hoping that would help me temporarily forget Drew’s silence.

“Hey, chickie. What’s going on?” she answered.

“Not much.”

“I hope I didn’t get you in trouble with your dad this morning. I was half asleep when he called.”

“It’s okay.”

“Well, where were you?” There was a brief moment of silence. “Really, Becca, you’re going to hold out on me?”

“I ended up falling asleep over at Drew’s,” I blurted out.

She gasped and giggled. “Becca? Were you finally being a naughty girl?”

Leave it to Krista to make me smile when I didn’t think it was possible. “No,” I said half-heartedly.

“Liar!” She laughed. “Well, I can’t say I blame you, girl, he is a total hottie! I saw him today without a shirt ……wow!”

The smile that was on my face instantly disappeared. “When did you see him today?” I asked.

“Ashton had a little beach party when he and the guys got done kayaking. He asked me to come and then got totally wasted, so I left. You know he’s so hot but he’s always drunk or high and that’s such a turn-off.”
That was his biggest turnoff to her
? If you asked me, everything about Ashton Barrett was a turnoff but I wasn’t going to go there with her right now.

“So what other girls were there?”

Krista picked up on my insecurities right away.

“No one worthwhile. Just all of Ashton’s little groupies that fall at his feet.”
Great, just what I wanted to hear.
I knew that all of those girls that Ashton associated with had sex with guys like it was nothing. “Don’t worry, Drew was behaving himself,” she said with a hint of sarcasm to her voice. I pretended to be into the rest of the conversation but my thoughts were totally consumed by Drew and what he was doing, who he was with, and if he was missing me as much as I was missing him.