Blackness Within (7 page)

I can see the evidence of her toiling on every surface of her home. She made this place what it is and she takes pride in it. It’s spotless yet feels lived in and comforting. The pictures on the wall show a progression through the years with her brother. I can tell it’s him because he looks so much like her and in a few of the shots the way his gaze is lingering on her is the same way I look at Kid when she’s not aware, protective and proud. He looks like he was a good guy. What happened to turn him into a man that abandons his sister who was obviously the center of his world? You’d have to kill me to get me to leave Kid and even then I’d watch over her in death.

Tears are streaming down the soft curve of Natasha’s honey-hued cheeks now. I can’t sit here and do nothing.

“Zeus, I’m gonna hug Natasha. Don’t eat me,” I say in a strong voice, holding his eyes as I ease my way over to Natasha.

I make it half way across the cushion when she leaps into my lap, knocking me back with force. I hold her snugly against my chest as sobs wrack her soft body. Zeus climbs onto the couch and lays his head in Natasha’s lap trying to comfort his owner. I shush her and gently rub a hand up and down her spine causing her to cry harder. I adjust our position a little so I can pull her closer to me, palming her ass as I do. It wasn’t a move to cop a feel, but my God her soft flesh in my hand is heaven on earth.

I shake it off and manage to get her flush with my body like I’m cradling a baby.

“It’s gonna be okay,” I assure her with a murmur into her hair that smells like peaches and cream. I place a soft kiss on her head and continue to hold her until she falls asleep in my arms. As her body goes limp and her stuttered breathing slows, I try to gather more of her against me. I can’t because I have all of her. It doesn’t stop me from trying.

Once I’m certain she’s good and asleep I shift a little and snag my phone out of my jacket. I hope she’s a deep sleeper.

“Finn Callaghan,” he answers briskly.

“Hey, Finn. I’ve got somethin’ I need you to get on right away,” I say quietly.

“Where are you? And why the fuck are you whispering?”

“It’s a long story. I’ll fill you in later. I need you to get everything you can on a Blake Reynolds. He’s a junkie, maybe involved in a kidnapping.”

“Shit. You’re not doin’ somethin’ stupid are you?” Finn asks, knowing the answer already.

I’m doing something very stupid right now.

“You remember that nurse that took care of Kid?”

“Natasha?” Finn asks shocked.

“Yeah. She’s in some trouble and I’m tryin’ to figure out how much and what we need to do to help her. I don’t wanna say more than that over the phone.”

“Gotcha. I’ll let you know when I’ve got somethin’.”

“Thanks,” I say moving to hang up.

“O’Sullivan,” he says grimly, stopping me in my tracks.

“Yeah?”

“Be smart here.”

“Right. Call me once you’ve got something.”

“Later.”

“Later.”

Natasha hasn’t so much as moved a muscle as I talked to one of my oldest friends. I live with two of his brothers and used to live with him until he was captured by a woman’s pussy and moved out on his own. It was a bad choice because like most women she was a lying, deceiving bitch. Finn is amazing at his job. He can find out anything about anybody. He seems to have connections all over the Midwest and uses them with calculated precision. Our firm couldn’t run without him and it wouldn’t be as successful if it weren’t for him.

The baby starts to cry in the other room and Zeus’s head pops up at attention.

“You watch her. I’ll get the baby,” I say to the dog like he can understand me. Weirdly, he seems to. As I slide Natasha off my lap, the dog climbs further into hers. He’s holding her as best he can.

I climb off the couch and go in search of the wailing. It’s not difficult to find him. Her house only has three doors in the hallway: one leading to a second bedroom with a single bed and a desk, another leading to a remodeled bathroom and the last, her bedroom where I find the baby.

Her room has a queen-sized bed covered in crisp white linens with buttercream walls. There are more pictures covering them in mismatched frames that fit together because they don’t go together. It’s the images the draw the line of connection. I spy one that has Natasha beaming a smile staring at me from her old oak dresser. It steals my breath until the baby squeals again, bringing me back to the task at hand.

He’s in a brand new playpen. I can tell it’s new because the tags are still on it and it doesn’t look used at all. I pick the baby up and he quiets immediately, so I set into the routine that’s been my life for two and a half years. I quickly change the baby and put him in a new outfit after ripping the tags off with my teeth. He laughs when I do it, which warms my heart. Living in a house with Kid and her three boys has turned me into a puddle of goo where babies are concerned. Not that I’d ever admit it.

Once the baby’s in a fuzzy navy fleece all-in-one outfit, I scoop him to my chest like a pro and move back to the kitchen. This could be tricky. Kid breastfed so I’ve never had to make formula before. I made it through law school, surely I can figure out how to do this. I read the instructions and set about making the bottle. I warm a pot of water on the stove and wait until I think it’s ready. A few drops on my wrist and it’s the perfect temperature. I grab a cloth diaper that’s draped over the back of one of the kitchen chairs and move back into the living room.

Gently, I sit down and pop the bottle in the little one’s mouth and watch him go to town. Zeus looks up from Natasha’s lap and I swear he gifts me a look of acceptance. I know it’s crazy, but that’s what it feels like all the same. Halfway through the bottle I pop the nipple out of the baby’s mouth and give him a good burp. And he complies willingly.

“That’s a good boy,” I whisper to him as I lay him back down across my arm and continue feeding him. “We need to give you a name, bud. If you’re gonna be around for a while, you need a name.”

He doesn’t respond other than to smile around the nipple causing formula to dribble from the corners of his mouth. I chuckle at the sight as I dab up the mess. I love babies. Yes, I’m aware that doesn’t make sense coming from the womanizer who would sooner cut off his nuts than get a woman pregnant, but it’s true. They’re cute, they smell sweet, they’re easy to entertain and they make me feel good. Enough said.

When he finishes his bottle and gives me another good burp, I cradle him against my chest and settle myself in. He’s asleep pretty quickly and I feel myself dozing along with the room. Natasha’s slow breathing combined with the sweet breaths tickling my neck lull me into a peaceful sleep. It’s short lived.

O’Sullivan

I launch off the couch in a stuporous state as Zeus growls and barks, lunging at the front door. I rub my eyes with the heel of my hand attempting to get my wits about me, the baby still asleep against my chest. Natasha is standing at the front door shaking from head to toe.

“Natasha?” I question softly.

“It’s Blake,” she whispers.

“Do you want me to deal with him?” I ask, striding to the door now in full control.

“I don’t know what I want right now, Sully,” she admits full of sadness.

I pull her into my arms cradling her and the baby against me. It feels better than it should so I quickly end the embrace and pass her the baby.

“I’ve got this,” I assure her.

I pull the door open with purpose and almost stumble at the man in front of me. He’s a shadow of the person in the pictures decorating his sister’s walls. His blond hair is shaggy and oily. Scabs and scars cover his once attractive face that’s now sallow and drawn, covered in a straggly beard. His clothes are too big for him, though they probably once fit his frame. He’s thin and malnourished unlike the muscular, broad shouldered man he used to be. He’s dying a slow death that’s becoming more imminent. It’s a depressing sight to witness, but I’m not sad. I’m fucking pissed off.

“Who the fuck are you?” he sneers.

Zeus has stopped his assault, obviously familiar with the shell of a being before us.

“I’m Brian O’Sullivan. How can I help you?” I answer coolly, reining in my temper.

I’m a fighter through and through. At every moment throughout the day, I’m assessing how I can best the people around me that could possibly pose a threat. Blake poses no threat and could be easily dispatched with one measured thrust of my fist.

“Where’s my sister?” he growls, moving toward me. Dude’s got balls.

“I’m right here, Blake,” Natasha’s voice breaks the tension from behind me.

“Can you back off this douche bag and let me in? It’s fuckin’ freezin’, Tosh,” he grumbles to his sister.

“Let him in, Sully. I don’t want this on my porch for the whole neighborhood to witness,” she says in a defeated voice that instantly irritates me. She shouldn’t cave to her brother or give a shit what anyone thinks about her. I know that’s easier said than done, but I hate the idea that she’s letting anyone dictate her life. No woman should allow anyone to tell her how to live. The best women in this world run their own shit and are confident in that power. I know Natasha is that woman. It’s evident in her home, her work and her willingness to take a baby and risk her life doing it. She needs help extending that power to her brother.

“Thank fuck you have the baby,” Blake breathes out when he sees his sister cradling the baby against her chest.

My six foot three frame was blocking his view before. Natasha is almost a foot shorter than me and she fits perfectly beneath my arm at my side, which is where I put her immediately after shutting and locking the door.

Blake’s eyebrows hit his hairline when I make the possessive move.

“Tosh, who the fuck is this dude?”

“Where did you get this baby, Blake? If you stole someone’s baby, I swear to God I’m callin’ the cops!” she screeches, waking the baby in her arms. She changes his position and bounces him a little, never leaving my side.

“I can’t remember. It’s pretty fuckin’ hazy,” he huffs, flopping down on the couch.

Zeus is stock still at Natasha’s other side. I rotate us slightly to maintain eye contact with Blake and she follows without hesitation right along with her dog.

“Did you steal him, Blake? Please tell me you didn’t. Please,” she begs with a quiver in her voice.

“I’m not a kidnapper, Natasha,” he scoffs.

“Then where did he come from? Babies don’t just drop out of the sky.”

“I don’t know where he came from. It’s a blur. I remember him bein’ in the house and cryin’. I tried to quiet him down then I put him in my room. He was gone when we woke up. I looked at a few other houses I thought we might’ve hit while we were fucked up. When I couldn’t find him, I came here.”

Natasha peels away from me and approaches her brother slowly. She sits down on the couch right next to him and tips her arm holding the baby toward Blake.

“Blake, look at him. He’s someone’s baby. If I call the cops or social services, you’re gonna get in trouble. Fuck, I’m gonna get in trouble.”

“I won’t let anything happen to you. I’ll take the heat. It’s my fault. Call the cops, Tosh. It’s time,” he says dejectedly.

“Hang on you two. We don’t know what we’re dealin’ with yet,” I interject as Zeus noses my hand for a pet. Ha! I knew we were bonding.

“Dude, I don’t know who the fuck you are, but this is none of your business. If you’re here to bang my sister, you might as well hit the pavement.”

“Blake!” Natasha scolds her brother.

“I’m an attorney that your sister called when she needed some help. She was alone,” I say pointedly.

“Well, I’m here now, so fuck off.”

I kind of like this guy. He couldn’t take me if he wanted to, but he’s protecting his sister. I’m the guy he should be protecting her from too. I’m bad news. I know this. But I’m here now and oddly invested, so he can try to scare me off all he wants. It won’t work.

“Stop it, Blake. I’m not eleven anymore. Sully’s here to help me. And with the state you’re in, I don’t think you’re capable of making me a cup of tea at this point.”

Blake looks at his sister with a curious gaze. He’s probably the only person she goes to when she needs help. I can tell how close they are. Even strung out and incapable of normal behavior, he’s here trying to do the right thing. He can’t do it though. If he knew where the baby came from or who he belongs to, he would be useful. At this point, he’s just an added problem.

I ease myself onto the couch next to Natasha and she backs into my chest. I don’t think she realized she was doing it until I sweep my arm around her shoulders and pull her tighter. Her soft body tenses slightly and then relaxes as I run my hand down the baby’s back. None of these moves on my part were thought out. I just did them. That’s concerning.

Zeus has flopped down in his bed, seemingly relaxed in the tension-filled room. Blake’s staring at my arm like he wants to rip it from my body and beat me to death with it. I feel a ghost of a smile skirt my lips as I lock eyes with him.

“Are you fuckin’ my sister?” he demands a little too loudly, making the baby jump beneath my hand.