Black Swan Green (14 page)

‘You’ve got to
pay
for what you’ve taken. That’s the
law
.’

‘I don’t have any money.’

‘Then think hard, Taylor. How else can you pay me?’

‘I—’ One dimple. Tiny hairs velvet the groove above her lip. Imp’s nose. Petalled lips. Hook smile. A reflected pair of me looking out from her bad-doe eyes. ‘I…I’ve got a pack of fruit Polos in my pocket. But they’re all glued together. You’d have to smash them with a rock.’

A spell broke. The arrow fell from my throat.

Dawn Madden climbed back into the tractor’s driving seat, bored.

‘What?’

Her answer was this disgusted gaze like I’d turned into a pair of flares on a reject rack in Tewkesbury Market.

I wanted the arrow back, now. ‘
What?
’

‘If you’re not off our land by the time I count to twenty,’ Dawn Madden crumpled a stick of Wrigley’s Spearmint into her beautiful mouth, ‘I’ll tell my stepfather you groped me. If you’re not off by the time I count to thirty, I’ll tell him you,’ her tongue licked the word, ‘touched me up. Swear to God.’

‘But I never
touched
you!’

‘My stepfather keeps a shotgun above the kitchen dresser. He might mistake
you
for a wickle fwuffy wabbit, Taylor. One – two – three—’

The bridlepath wandered into this once-upon-a-time orchard. Brittle thistles and fluffy grass’d grown elbow high so you waded rather than walked. I was still thinking about Dawn Madden. I didn’t understand. She must sort of fancy me. She wouldn’t’ve given her only Danish pastry to just any kid who happened along. And I sure as hell fancied Dawn Madden. Fancying girls’s dangerous, though. Not dangerous, but not simple. It
can
be dangerous. Kids at school
rip
the piss out of you, at first. ‘Ooh, a
baby
’s on its way,’ they say, if they see you holding hands in the corridor. Boys who fancy the girl might pick a scrap with you to show her she’s going out with a squirt. Then, once you’re an official couple like Lee Biggs and Michelle Tirley, you’ve got to endure her friends writing both your initials plus ‘4 EVER’ in arrowed hearts all over their rough books. Teachers join in. When Mr Whitlock was doing hermaphroditic reproduction in worms last term, he called one worm ‘Worm Lee’ and the other ‘Worm Michelle’. Us boys thought it was a bit funny but the girls
screamed
with laughter like the TV audience on
Happy Days
. ’Cept for Michelle Tirley herself, who turned
beetroot
, hid her face in her hands and wept. Mr Whitlock took the piss out of her for that, too.

There’re gaps between me and Dawn Madden. Kingfisher Meadows’s the poshest estate in Black Swan Green, most kids reckon. Her stepfather’s farmhouse is the opposite of posh. I’m in 2KM, the top class at school. She’s in 2LP, second from bottom. These gaps aren’t easy to ignore. There are rules.

Then there’s sexual intercourse. You don’t do it in biology till the third year. A diagram in a textbook of an erect penis in a vagina is one thing, but actually
doing
it, that’s another. The only actual vagina I’ve seen was on a greasy photo Neal Brose charged us 5p to look at. It was a baby kangaroo-prawn in its mother’s hairy pouch. I almost vommed up my Mars Bar and Outer Spacers.

I’ve never even kissed anyone.

Dawn Madden’s eyes are dark honey.

A conker tree’d erupted out of the earth and’d flexed out millions of strong arms and strong legs. Someone’d hung a tyre-swing off one bough. The tyre spun gently as the Earth spun under it. Rainwater’d pooled inside but I tipped it out and had a go. Weightlessness orbiting Alpha Centauri’d be best, but weightlessness on a swing isn’t bad. If Moran’d been there too it’d’ve been an ace laugh. After a bit I shimmied up the frayed rope to

see how climbable the tree was. Once you were up, it was
dead
climbable. I even found the ruins of a tree house. Donkey’s yonks’d gone by since it’d seen active service, mind. Higher up, I crawled along a branch and peered out of the green bell. You could see for
miles
. Back towards Black Swan Green, Dawn Madden’s farm silos, a spiral staircase of smoke, the Christmas tree plantation, St Gabriel’s spire and its two nearly-as-tall redwoods.

With my Swiss Army knife I carved this in the ribbly bark.

The sap on my blade smelt green. Miss Throckmorton used to tell us that people who carve things on trees are the wickedest sorts of vandals ’cause they’re not only making graffiti, they’re hurting living beings too. Miss Throckmorton might be right but she can’t’ve ever been a thirteen-year-old boy who met a girl like Dawn Madden.
One day
, I thought,
I’ll bring her up to show her this
. I’d do my first kiss with her. Right here. She’d touch me. Right here.

Round the other side of the conker tree, I looked at what lay up the bridlepath. A lane snaking to Marl Bank and Castlemorton, fields, more fields, a glimpse of an old grey turret rising above the firs. Line of pylons. You could pick out details on the Malvern Hills now. Sun flashed off cars on the Wells Road. Termite-sized walkers crossing Perserverance Hill. Underneath, somewhere, ran the third tunnel. I ate my block of Wensleydale and broken Jacobs crackers, wishing I’d brought some water. I climbed back to the tyre-swing rope and was just about to shimmy down when I heard a man’s voice and a woman’s voice.

‘See?’ Tom Yew, I recognized straight off. ‘
Told
you it was just a bit farther.’

‘Yeah, Tom,’ answered the woman, ‘about twenty times.’

‘
You
said you wanted somewhere private.’

‘I didn’t mean halfway to Wales.’ Now I saw Debby Crombie. Debby Crombie I’ve never spoken to, but Tom Yew’s Nick Yew’s older brother, on leave from the Royal Navy. I could’ve just called out ‘Hi!’ and come down the rope and it’d’ve been fine. But being invisible was fun. I retreated back along the bough to a fork in the trunk and waited till they’d gone.

But they didn’t go. ‘This is it.’ Tom Yew stopped right by the swing. ‘The Yew Boys’ Very Own Horse Chestnut Tree.’

‘Won’t there be ants and bees and things here?’

‘It’s called “nature”, Debs. You get it a lot in the countryside.’

Debby Crombie unspread a rug in a dell between two roots.

Even now I could’ve (should’ve) let them know I was there.

I tried to. But before I’d worked out an excuse without a stammer-word, Tom Yew and Debby Crombie’d lain down on the rug and started snogging. His fingers undid the buttons up her lavender dress, one at a time, from her knees to her sunburnt neck.

If I said anything
now
, I’d be dead meat.

The conker tree swished, creaked and rocked.

Debby Crombie stuck her finger into Tom Yew’s fly and murmured, ‘Hello, sailor.’ That made them giggle so much they had to stop snogging. Tom Yew reached for his backpack, got out two bottles of beer, and flipped off their caps with his Swiss Army knife. (Mine’s red. His is black.)

They clinked bottles. Tom Yew said, ‘Here’s to…’

‘…me, gorgeous me.’

‘
Me
, wonderful me.’

‘I said it first.’

‘Okay. You.’

They swigged their brown beery sunshine.

‘And,’ Debby Crombie added, seriously, ‘a safe tour of duty.’

‘’
Course
it’s safe, Debs! Five months cruising round the Adriatic, the Aegean, the Suez and the Gulf? Worst that’ll happen to
me
is sunburn.’

‘Ah, but once you’re on board the
Coventry
,’ Debby Crombie pouted, or pretended to, ‘you’ll forget all about your pining sweetheart back in boring old Worcestershire. You’ll go out on the razz in Athens and pick up VD from some floozy Greek temptress called…’

‘Called what?’

‘…Iannos.’

‘“Iannos” is a boy’s name. It’s Greek for “John”.’

‘Yeah, but you’d only find that out
after
he’d filled you full of ouzo and strapped you to his bed frame.’

Tom Yew lay back grinning and looked up
straight
at me.

Thank God he wasn’t looking at what he was looking at. Cobras can spot prey move from half a mile away. But if you don’t move a
muscle
, they can’t see you, even from five feet. It was that that saved me this afternoon.

‘Used to climb this very tree, y’know, when Nick was a wee nipper. One summer, we built a tree house. Wonder if it’s still up there…’

Debby Crombie was already stroking his groin. ‘Nothing wee about
this
nipper, Thomas William Yew.’ Debby Crombie unpeeled Tom Yew’s Harley Davidson T-shirt and flung it away. His back’s glazed and muscly like Action Man’s. He’s got a blue swordfish tattooed on one shoulder.

She squirmed out of her unbuttoned lavender dress.

If Dawn Madden’s breasts were a pair of Danishes, Debby Crombie’s got two Space Hoppers. Each armed with a gribbly nipple. Tom Yew kissed them in turn and his saliva glistened in the April sun. I
know
watching was wrong but I couldn’t not. Tom Yew slipped off her red panties and stroked the cressy hair there.

‘If you want me to stop, Madam Crombie, you have to say now.’

‘Oooh, Master Yew,’ she croodled, ‘don’t you
dare
.’

Tom Yew got on her and sort of jiggled there and she gasped like he was giving her a Chinese burn and wrapped her legs round him, froggily. Now he moved up and down, Man-from-Atlantisly. His silver chain jiggled on his neck.

Now her grubby soles met like they were praying.

Now his skin was glazed in roast pork sweat.

Now she made a noise like a tortured Moomintroll.

Now Tom Yew’s body jerkjerked judderily jackknifed and a noise like a ripping cable tore out of him. Once more, like he’d been booted in the balls.

Her fingernails’d sunk salmony welts into his arse.

Debby Crombie’s mouth made a perfect O.

A chime from St Gabriel’s for one o’clock, or maybe two, eddied this far. Moran the Deserter’d be
miles
up the bridlepath by now. My only hope was if he got his leg caught in a rusty badger trap. He’d
beg
me to go and get help. I’d say, ‘Well, Moran, why don’t I
think
about it?’

Debby Crombie and Tom Yew
still
hadn’t unglued themselves. She was just drowsing, but Tom Yew was snoring. A Red Admiral fluttered on to the small of his back to drink from the puddle of sweat there.

I felt hungry and nervy and sick and jealous and sluggy and shamed and many things. Not proud and not pleased and not like I ever wanted to do
that
. The noises they’d made weren’t quite human. The breeze lullabied the conker tree and the conker tree lullabied me.

‘
GaaaAAA!
’ Tom Yew shouted. ‘
FAAAAAAAAA!
’

Debby Crombie shrieked too. Her eyes were open and white.

He’d jumped off her and’d fallen on to his side.

‘Tom! Tom! It’s okay it’s
okay
it’s
OKAY!
’

‘Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck
.’

‘Darling! It’s Debs! It’s okay! It’s a nightmare! Only a nightmare!’

Nuddy sunbaked Tom Yew shut his scared eyes, nodded that he understood, crouched against a tentacle-root and gripped his throat. That shout must’ve
torn
his vocal cords.

‘It’s all right.’ Debby Crombie shuffled her lavender dress on and hugged Tom Yew like a mother. ‘Darling, you’re trembling! Put some clothes on. It’s all right now.’

‘Debs, I’m sorry.’ His voice was crumpled. ‘Must’ve scared you.’

She spread his shirt over his shoulders. ‘What was it, Tom?’

‘Nothing.’

‘Oh, like hell it was nothing. Tell me!’

‘I was on the
Coventry
. There was enemy fire…’

‘Go on. Go on.’

Tom Yew clenched his eyes shut and shook his head.

‘Go
on
, Tom!’

‘No more, Debs. It was too…too fucking real.’

‘But Tom. I
love
you. I want to know.’

‘Yeah, and I love
you
too much to
tell
you and that’s that. C’mon on. Let’s get back to the village. Before some kid sees us.’

Cauliflowers grew in neat rows between pointy ridges. I was halfway across when the planes came roaring, demolishing the sky over the Severn Valley. Tornados fly over our school several times a day, so I was ready to cover my ears with my hands. But I
wasn’t
ready for
three
Hawker Harrier Jump Jets, close enough to the ground to hit with a cricket ball. The slam of noise was
incredible
! I bent into a tight ball and peeped out. The Harriers curved before they smashed into the Malverns, just, and flew off towards Birmingham, screaming under Soviet radar height. When World War III comes, it’ll be MiGs stationed in Warsaw or East Germany screaming under NATO radar. Dropping bombs on people like us. On English cities, towns and villages like Worcester, Malvern and Black Swan Green.