Black Sheep (Rawkfist MC Book 1) (20 page)

Court

M
y mom always said regrets were the worst
feeling in the world. I knew she had many, and they killed her as much as the
cancer did. My life isn’t complicated, and I’ve never suffered many doubts
about my decisions. I couldn’t even regret hooking up with Becca because I’d be
wishing Felix didn’t exist. No, I managed to go a long time without regretting
much.

Today, I
regret my inability to kill Becca.

Justice is more
pissed than hurt. When I arrive at her house, she’s pacing around the living
room, dodging cats and blowing her bangs out of her eyes.

Our gazes meet,
and she knows I want her to drop the charges. Well, not want, but need her to drop
them. The club hates the law, and my woman just invited them into our town.

Reading my
mind, Justice blurts out, “I can either kill her or press charges. Since I’m
not a killer, I’m left with using the courts.”

“I guess,” I
softly say while approaching the riled up beauty, “but people around here don’t
believe in the law.”

“By people, you
mean the club. Well, fuck that shit. I’m me, not the bitch of the Rawkfist
Motorcycle Club. They aren’t doing anything to protect me. They do nothing to
protect Felix or Becca’s other kids. They let the queef run around town doing
whatever she wants.”

Before I can
respond, Justice revs up again. “No, I’m making her pay for coming after me.
Someone needs to punish her. I know you can’t do it. Your mommy issues have
twisted your poor male brain into thinking you can’t fuck up a woman. Okay,
that’s nice, but I am not you. I want revenge.”

“Mommy issues?”

Justice lifts
an eyebrow, challenging me. Suddenly, the bedroom becomes a prime destination.

“Either you
have mommy issues, or you still have feelings for Becca. Which is it?”

“My only
feelings for her are hate.”

“Then kill
her.”

“I can’t.”

“Because she’s
Felix’s mom and he might one day find out you killed her, and he might hate
you, and you can’t have him hating you.”

Taking a
careful step closer, I reach out to fix the bangs causing her trouble.

“I want to have
a life with you, but you’ll be the reason his mom goes to jail.”

“Prison, not
jail. I want her to do real time and have a real record. That way, she can’t
pull the unfit father crap with you since she’ll be an ex-con too. You’ll be
even, and we all know you’re better anyway.”

“Damn, you’re
riled up,” I say, fighting a grin because she’s unbelievably sexy right now.

“Fucking yes,
I’m riled up. I’m pissed, and I want my damn revenge. If I were Journey, I’d
hunt down Becca and beat her to death with my bare hands. I’m not tough like
that, and I don’t think I could kill someone. This is my rational solution.”

Justice takes a
deep breath, and I see the rage cooling in her eyes. She holds my hands and
forces a smile.

“I know you’re
scared of having Felix suffer. I get that, but you and I know he’s better off
without that queef. He probably knows it too. Everyone is better off without
her. Some people are just awful, and there’s no fixing them. Becca is that kind
of person. She has three kids but no tenderness for any of them. That’s psycho
stuff.”

“You’re right,
but I’ve had the no snitch crap ingrained in my head.”

Justice’s
confidence falters. “If I do this, will it put you in a bad position with the
club?”

“No. I mean, I
don’t think so. You’re Jared’s kid, and I know people around here get that
you’re like Christine. She didn’t stick around and do what everyone else did.
They probably don’t expect you to follow their rules.”

“Couldn’t they
secretly want me to handle Becca so they won’t have to? They can keep their
rules, and I can do the dirty work. I’ll do it too. That’s why I’m a good
manager. I don’t mind making the ugly choices. I’ll fire anyone if they suck.
I’d fire my mother if she slacked off.”

“You’re so damn
sexy when you say shit like that.”

Justice erases
the space between us and leans against me. “I’d even fire you, Court, if you
didn’t do everything I demanded. I’d only give you the one warning before I
spanked you for being bad.”

“Now, you're
just cruel. You know Jared is headed this way, and we can’t spend an hour in
your room.”

Justice stares
into my eyes and slides her little pink tongue along her lips. “I don’t need an
hour. Five or ten minutes will do.”

“You always say
that, but then our quickie turns into an all out adventure.”

Justice smiles,
but I sense she’s tired. All of that sexy rage wore her out, leaving her
vulnerable. I know the anxious look in her eyes.

“I have this
club meeting, and then I’ll be back here.”

“Is Felix
staying over?” she immediately asks.

“It might be
best if he stays with his grandma tonight. I’m sure Astrid is feeling a million
different things about Becca’s arrest. She’ll want her grandbabies around her.”

Seeing her
disappointment over Felix not coming over, I’ve never loved her more than right
now. I’ve played safe with my heart, but Justice claims people and chooses to
love the hell out of them.

I hate leaving
her for even an hour, but Jared arrives, and the club is waiting for us. Justice
says she’ll have Journey spoil her until I return.

Looking at Journey,
she mumbles in a baby voice, “I was hit in the head with a broom.”

Her sister
kisses her forehead. “I heard that. I’m proud of you for not dying from such a
brutal attack.”

“Queef,” Justice
growls at her laughing sister.

I hurry out of
the door while they’re in a good mood. In an ideal world, I’d pick up Felix and
spend the night with Justice and her family. Our evenings together are always
relaxing, and Felix is a different kid around them. Confident even and I need
that for him.

Jared says
nothing to me until we’re about to enter The Rock Tavern.

Grabbing my
bicep, he leans into me to whisper. “Don’t say anything. You just let them
bitch. Justice will change her mind when she realizes the trouble she’s
causing…”

“Are you
fucking kidding?” I ask, yanking my arm free. “Have you never met Justice? She
won’t change her mind.”

“I plan to talk
to her.”

“You do that.”

“Just don’t
make an ass of yourself in there.”

“I promise
nothing.”

“You sound like
Justice.”

“Thank you.”

Jared can’t
fight his smile. I know he loves his girls, but he’s at a loss on how to deal
with them. One day, I might explain how “dealing” with them only requires
accepting them. They’ll never change, but they don’t expect us to change
either. Nothing more complicated than that.

In the
backroom, everyone frowns at Jared and me. I notice Elroy scanning the room for
listening devices. Shaking my head, I don’t get the paranoia. The local cops
and Feds couldn’t wire up this building without everyone in town knowing in an
hour. No secrets exist in Tumbling Rock. Fuck, I even know when someone’s got a
bad case of hemorrhoids, but, Joe somehow thinks outsiders showed up and placed
surveillance all over his bar.

“It’s good,
boss,” Elroy says.

Joe nods and
then looks at Jared. “Your girl needs to drop the charges before this thing
gets out of hand.”

“Might be too
late for that. Becca’s on tape trashing the store, and she attacked the
deputies. Even if Justice drops the assault charges, they’ve got Becca on other
shit.

“Fuck!” Joe
hollers. “I blame you two fuckers for not making clear how things run in this
town. You got to get those women under control before we have cops up our
asses.”

“What a bunch
of bullshit,” I blurt out, unable to stop myself. “Do you hear how you sound?”

“What are you
bitching about?”

“We’re bikers.
We’re criminals breaking the law. We’re supposed to be intimidating, but you’re
pissing yourself over a battle between two chicks.”

“You need to
watch yourself, boy,” Joe mutters, sounding more like the scary club president
than the pussy he’s become.

“Let’s say Justice
refuses to testify and the rest of the charges get dropped. Then what? I’ll
tell you what. Becca comes back here and starts shit again. How does that make
us look good? Who is gonna respect a group of men who can’t handle that bitch?”

“Do you want us
to kill her? Everyone will be looking at us if she goes missing.”

“We don’t have
to kill her now. Justice got Becca locked up. We let her use the law to fix our
problem.”

“We don’t help
the law! You fucking know that!”

Crossing my
arms like every other guy in the room, I sigh. “We aren’t helping the law. Justice
isn’t a part of the club. She’s pissed, and she’s going after Becca using the
law. Besides, everyone in town heard how at the fair Becca threatened to
involve the law. She was ready to break the rule to hurt us, so why not show
people what happens when someone makes those threats? We get them arrested
first. Why not make the law our weapon?”

Joe stops
frowning ugly at me long enough to give Ned a side glance. They look back at me
and Joe nods.

“That’s true.
The bitch made a big show of putting you in prison. People were talking about
how she was going against the town’s law. Might serve her right to do some
time.”

The guys chew
on this idea while Joe nods a bit more. “This is good,” he says, pointing at
me. “I don’t like your mouth, Boy Scout, and I ain’t saying I won’t run you off
the road if I see the chance. Still, this is what we need. Fresh ideas.
Thinking in a new way. Times are changing, and we might need to change too.”

“Think Justice
will back out?” Ned asks.

“No way. She’s
pissed.”

“Good,” Joe
said, sounding almost happy. “We make an example of Becca by allowing your ex
to do some hard time. The cops would love to bust her since they’re assholes.”

“What if Becca
starts talking shit about us to the cops?” Ned asks me as if I’m in charge.

“Saying shit
and proving it are two different things. She doesn’t know anything, and her
word isn’t enough for anyone to press charges. Just in case, I’ll have my PD
guy keep an ear out.”

Joe claps his
hands and smiles at the men. “Well look at us using those law and order fuckers
to our advantage. Never expected this fucking day to come.”

After a few
minutes of idle chatter about everyone keeping their heads down and watching
for trouble, Joe finishes the meeting. I’m relieved to return to Justice.

“That went
better than I expected,” Jared says as we stand outside. “You best hope nothing
changes.”

“Are you coming
to the house?”

“Shit, kid, are
you living there now?”

“Basically. Why
would I want to go to my place when I could hang out with Justice?”

“I guess. A
little independence wouldn’t kill you.”

“Man, I love
you,” I say, patting his shoulder, “but you need to stop giving me dating
advice. None of the shit you’ve said is right, and you’re starting to make
yourself look dumb.”

Jared smacks me
upside the head and laughs. “The balls on you.”

I climb on my
Harley and glance around. “You should come over and spend time with your
daughters.”

“Christine will
be there, and fucking wasn’t enough to fix her problems with me.”

“Have you tried
talking to her?”

“I thought you
said the shit I say is all wrong.”

“Very true.”

Grinning at his
expression, I rev the engine and let the Harley purr for a minute. On the way
home, I decide to pick up a thing of flowers for Justice. She’ll think I’m
awesome, and we can play in her room for a while. As much as the day sucked,
the night should prove to be a shit-ton better.

Justice

P
eople look at me odd since I called the cops
on Becca. Not weird as in they’re proud of me for sticking up for law and
order. More like they’re worried I’m dangerous to them and their kin. At the
Mart, people choose to stand in a longer line and have Ali help them rather
than deal with me. I’m a frigging pariah for asking for help from people paid
to help.

“Our taxes pay
for them,” I tell Court as we drive to pick up Felix from his grandma’s house.
“Not using the cops is a waste of our money.”

“I doubt many
people in Tumbling Rock pay property taxes, Justice. I’d say at least half of
the populace is renting.”

“Well, still,
they should just get over their queef and stop giving me dirty looks.”

“I’m surprised
you care so much.”

Realizing I’m
teetering close to regretting a decision; I shift my expression into
disinterest and shrug.

“It doesn’t
bother me, per se, but I have a family, and they’re getting dirty looks too.
Some queef didn’t want Journey to do her ultrasound because I was a snitch.
Poppy has kids talking smack about her. I doubt she cares, but Mom had a few
clients cancel appointments because she raised a snitch.”

“I’m sorry, but
you did the right thing. Eventually, people will thank you. No one likes Becca.
Even her friends flinch around her.”

I park in front
of Astrid’s house and study Court. “Do you think I did the right thing?”

“You punished a
bitch that needed punishing. If you want to feel good about your decision, just
take a look at Astrid and the kids. Because of you, they don’t have to worry
about Becca’s temper.”

“I still can’t
believe they refused her bail.”

“She kept
hitting the staff and other prisoners. Shows you how fucking stupid she is. If
she kept her temper in check, she’d be out right now. Of course, we got lucky
because she’s an idiot.”

I glance to the
front porch where Felix says goodbye to his grandma. Astrid waves at us,
looking happier with me than most people in Tumbling Rock.

“I’m a hero,” I
announce to Court before Felix joins us. “A frigging hero standing up for
righteousness and the American way.”

Court
doesn’t want to laugh. He fights the urge
before finally giving in. Felix climbs into the backseat and smiles at his
father.

“What’s so
funny?”

I smile back at
Felix. “Your father farted. So are you ready to see a movie?”

“Which one are
we going to?”

“I don’t care.”

“You need to
help us choose,” Court says, still laughing.

“I like all movies.
Well, not the profound ones. I don’t go to the movies to learn to be a better
person.”

“Why should you
improve when you’re already a frigging hero?” Court jokes while I drive toward
the discount movie theater in nearby Rock Top Falls.

I roll my eyes,
but his teasing finally makes me laugh. Felix doesn’t know what the queef we’re
talking about, but he ends up laughing too.

Old Towne
Cinema plays movies about to hit DVD. Tickets are cheap, and they have decent
deals on popcorn and soda too.

“I started bringing
Felix here when he was four,” Court says, paying for our tickets. “He loves
watching movies on the big screen.”

Messing with
the boy’s wavy hair, I wrap an arm around his shoulders and use him as a
crutch.

“I’m tired.
Help me walk,” I say, and he laughs again.

We settle into
our seats in the worn theater. I’m chowing down on popcorn when I catch the boy
staring at me.

“What?”

“I’m sorry my
mom hurt you.”

Swallowing the
popcorn, I glance at a troubled Court. He’s so damn adorable when he’s a
worried daddy.

“You need to
stop apologizing for her, Felix. We don’t choose our parents. Like I didn’t
choose for my mom to be an awful cook or for my dad to be a mustached biker
with killer loins. You didn’t choose to have a thug for a mom or a sweetie-peetie
for a papa.”

“Papa,” Felix
says, grinning at Court. “Papa, thank you for the popcorn, Papa.”

“Oh, boy.”

Giggling, I
nudge Court with my elbow. “You’re welcome, Papa, and feel free to thank me
later, Papa. Wink, wink.”

A grinning
Court wraps an arm around my neck. Felix looks at his move and rolls his eyes.

“Poppy is a bad
influence on you,” I tell the boy.

“She says the
same thing about you.”

“Yes, but she’s
fifteen and biologically incapable of being right about anything. Don’t trust a
word out of her mouth.”

“She said you
wet the bed until you were forty.”

Gaping at the
boy, I’m utterly shocked by my sister’s horrifying claim.

“You think I’m
over forty?” I balk, and Felix shrugs. “Kids today have no respect. Now turn
down your rock music and get off my lawn.”

Felix laughs
easily, knowing I’m not angry. He gets me, and I get him too. He just wants to
be happy. No drama. No bad moods. No ducking an angry mother. No counting the
days until the good parent picks him up.

Poppy’s dad was
abusive in his lame nagging way, but I never let him bother me. I don’t know
anyone who ever cared much about what Paul Adams said, but maybe he did wear
down Christine’s confidence. He might even be why she decided to return to West
Virginia.

I don’t know
what having a crappy parent is like. Even Jared does his best, and his clumsy
parenting is a result of a lack of experience rather than disinterest.

After getting
lucky with my parents, I want Felix to be lucky too. He deserves to smile
without worrying about someone taking it as a slight.

So even if the
entire town thinks I’m a rat snitch, I did right by this one child. His smile
makes all of the whisperings behind my back and the dirty looks worth it.