Bittersweet Revenge (10 page)

            “Whatever your beef is…” She said in between giggles as she slipped a piece of watermelon into her mouth, “you can take it elsewhere.” The lunchroom was becoming quieter as everyone started paying more attention to them.

            “You know beef, because you smell like beef, is that a new cologne. It smells like…” she said, making a gesture as if she was sniffing the air…. “My grandma’s vegetable soup.” Murderous rage was becoming more evident in his facial features. I almost wanted to close my eyes, but it was like watching a plane crash. You were scared for everyone, but you just couldn’t look away.

            “You will pay for this Mimi, I swear. I’ll have you bawling your eyes out. You don’t want to play games with me, ask Jenna it never ended well for her.” His voice sends shivers down my spine. For a short amount of time it was great not having the attention put on me, and though there are some things that needed to be discussed between me and Rex, it was almost like being a regular teenager.

“That’s weird… for some unknown reason I just don’t seem to care. All you do is bully people, you bullied Jenna, and you bullied and used me. Seems like all your good at or known for is making people cry, pissing them off, or making them sad. Really seems like you’re going somewhere, so please keep enlightening me about how much you hate me, and how much you're going to hurt me when we both know you won't do anything. All you are is a sad son of a bitch who hates himself so much that he has to hate on everyone else to make himself even feel the slightest bit of happiness… and that is not mine, Jenna’s or anyone else’s fault. You brought this on yourself. I’m just saying what no one else has the balls to say.”

 There’s not an ounce of fear in her voice, and she doesn’t even look at him as she says this. She just pops another piece of watermelon in her mouth and carries on like she didn’t just say the one thing I’ve wanted to for the last year.

I almost want to reach across the table and give her a high five, but refrain because that could land me in some extremely hot water. There are a few gasps, and everyone’s head seems to turn in reaction to her comment, even the lunch ladies look up from their tasks.

“What did you just say to me?” Corey all but comes undone. His fist is clenched so hard, the tendons in his arms look at if they’ll snap. His teeth are gritted and he looks like an extremely pissed off bear.

“Mimi, stop.” I whisper, her eyes pierce mine. There’s courage, and devotion in them. It’s then I realize she did this for me. She called Corey out on his shit and made him pay. She embarrassed him in front of the entire school just like he did me last year. She’s made a complete and utter fool of him in front of everyone just like he had to me every day.

She’s done far more than I could ever ask someone to do. She’s put herself in the way of a bully. A smile shines on her face, and she’s actually beaming when she says the next words. “You heard me.”

Out of nowhere, Ryder strolls up. You have to be kidding me. “What’s going on?” He asks sliding into the seat next to me. As if things couldn’t get worse. “Now is not a good time Ryder.” I say quietly. It feels like the room is about to catch fire, like Mimi has just given Corey the fuel he needs to start a blazing one, and something tells me he will.

Corey walks around the table, anger definite in every stride he takes. He leans his arms down on the table across from Mimi, their noses touch, and it almost seems like it should be an intimate gesture.

Eyes searing he says in a faint whisper. “You will pay, even if it takes every fiber of my being, you will I can promise. I will make yours, Jenna’s, and everyone’s life hell. That’s not an open threat anymore. I will hurt you, if you fuck with me again.” His eyes turn to slits, and I shudder from the emotions rolling off of him, drowning out anything else.

“It was worth it.” Is all that Mimi says with a straight look on her face. Corey removes himself from the table, punching the door on his way out. The ricocheting noise of the door hitting the wall is all that’s heard; and my heart beating out of my chest.

I need to find Rex and I need to find him now.  I look over at Ryder, and he has the same look on his face as mine does. “Do you know where Rex is?” I need to find him before Corey does, I know all too well his threat doesn’t go without warning, when he says he’s going to do something, he does.

“I don’t know Jenna, today is my first day, and he wasn’t home when I left… I honestly thought he was here with you.” My emotions are swirling around, and I feel the tall-tell signs of a panic attack coming on. I feel like I can’t control anything in my life right now.

This insane game of Jenga were playing is spiraling out of control. The pieces I had precisely put in place feel as if they’re going to tumble down on me, bringing everything I’ve tried so hard to balance. I feel like crying, but I can’t, the tears won’t come and I just don’t understand why.

“I can call him if you want me too.” I shake my head at him. It’s not Ryder’s job to hunt my absent boyfriend, if you could even call him that.

“You don’t honestly believe his threats do you Jenna, they’re just that, threats.” Mimi says unfazed by anything that has just went down. Her emotions are either made of steel or she’s really good at hiding shit.

“Hello, I do in fact believe his threats. He’s made my life hell, if this is what I get for turning him down when it came to putting out, I would’ve easily put out, to not have to deal with this shit. At least then my heart would’ve only been broken a short amount of time. This, this has gone on way too long.” I say letting out a defeated sigh.  All of this is my fault, and it makes me wish I wasn’t here.

“Don’t talk like that, virginity isn’t given, it’s earned with loyalty, and love and you don’t have sex because you feel obligated to do so. Doing that would’ve done you no good; he would’ve had sex with you, left you, and still made your life hell. There is no cure for being an asshole. Well except for me, I’m a pretty good cure for assholes. Mimi says lightening the mood slightly.

“It doesn’t matter, I feel like all of this is my fault. All I want is to be happy. That’s all I want is happiness. I can’t get even a shred of it. I don’t know who I can trust, I don’t know what's going on and all of it scares me.” Trust is something needed in  every relationship, it doesn’t matter if it’s love or friendship, without it you have nothing, no relationship just two people on two different realms going down two different paths.

“You can trust me.” Mimi says. I look at her, but it feels like I’m looking through her. Can I really, or have I been so naive to all the things going on around me that I have this false idea of what trust is. Maybe everyone that said they were there for me isn’t.

“Can I really?” I ask as if seeing her in a new light. Things between her and Corey have been way deeper than what I initially thought; and Rex I don’t even want to know what he could be lying to me about. Oddly, the only person I feel I can trust is also the only person I know nothing about. Ryder. Even stranger, it feels like he’s the only one in my corner.

“Did you really just say that, after everything I’ve done for you, after everything that just happened, you question my loyalty to you?” I can’t even muster up anything to say so I stare down at my tray.

“God damn of all people Jenna, you're the last person I expected this from.” Mimi says visibly shaken by my admission as she all but pushes her tray off the table. Its contents hit the floor with a loud thud, watermelon, tacos, and milk cover the seat next to me. The room gets quiet, and I think this is the most drama this school has ever seen.

“Ms. Haines my office NOW!” The guidance counselor says as she exits the lunch room. I wasn’t even aware there was a teacher in sight. Great.

“It could be worse.” Ryder says shyly as I pick up my tray and dump it. Not really, today seems to be at the top of the worst it could be list.

Walking out of the lunch room I see no one other than Angela and her posse. They sneer and laugh as I walk by, what it would be like to dump a tray of food over her head I think to myself as I walk to the office. The door opens for me, and I take a seat in the colorful, brightly lit room.

“I see you’ve been having some issues with other students, it's also been brought to my attention that you’re spreading rather nasty rumors about some of your peers. Now why would you be doing such a thing?” My jaw drops open at Miss M’s statement, I’m not even sure I heard what she said.

“What did you say?” I ask astonished, and angry that I would be accused of such a thing. This woman has lost her damn mind if she thinks I’m the one spreading rumors about people around this school.

“You heard me Jenna, I’ve never had a complaint about you till this year, seems you have been causing a bit of ruckus among the students. You do realize the schools policy on violence, and harassment right?” As I’m listening to her words I just can’t come up with anything to say in return.

“You have the wrong person Ms. M, if anything it’s me who’s been bullied. Do I even remotely look like someone who would say cruel things about others?” She looks at me sideways, as if she’s not sure she believes what I’m saying.

“That’s strange I have had quite a few complaints of you harassing Angela Winchester and her brother Corey, what do you have to say about that?” The shit storms just keeps a coming now doesn’t it.

“I have no recollection of such acts, I don’t talk to Corey, nor do I talk to Angela; whoever is telling you these things are lying. I keep to myself. I have been hurt many times by untrue statements and in no way would I ever talk about others like that, I know how much it hurts.” I guess when Corey said he would get back at us he really meant it that was fast. To think this kind of thing doesn’t surprise me, how many people get made fun of, or picked on and the tormentor turns around and accuses the victim of the very thing they were doing.

“Jenna, I want to make it clear if I hear of you doing this again, I will be contacting your parents and you will be suspended do I make myself clear?” Her tone is deep, and I just don’t understand how she can accuse me of this, she’s justifying their actions without even knowing it.

“Yes.” I grit out angry that I would have to agree to something so absurd. “You may go now.” She says dismissing me as if I’m the gum on the bottom of her shoe. I leave her office more pissed than I was before. I feel like breaking something, throwing something, anything. Then I see him, standing up against a row of lockers talking to his brother.

The fire inside me dissipates a little but is filled with a whole new kind of passion. Our eyes meet, and I yearn to go to him, to be in his arms. I all but run the rest of the length between us burying my head in his chest. The crisp smell of his cologne with the warmth of his body does fuzzy things to my head.

“I missed you.” He whispers only for me to hear as his hand rubs the length of my back. The second I remember Ryder is standing mere feet away, I pull away and scowl at him. “We need to talk, about that.” I say pointing to Ryder who has a grin the size of Texas on his face.

“Yes we do.” He replies in a determined voice.

“Why didn’t you tell me you had a twin brother?” I ask patiently waiting for an answer. He looks as if he's going to say something to me, but Ryder interrupts. “I’m going to go dude, I don’t want to be here when she rips you a new asshole.” He gives me a cheesy grin, before hitting his brother on the shoulder and walking away. My attention returns back to Rex, thankful that we finally have a chance to be alone.

“You could’ve told me, I feel like you're shutting me out. It hurts, were falling apart before we even get the chance to grow together. If you can’t trust me there is nothing between us.” I can’t believe those words just came out of my mouth.

He looks at me as if he’s seeing through me, as if the words I just uttered are a complete shock to him. If what I just said doomed us completely. 

“How can you say that, of course I trust you Jenna. I’ve never felt like this about anyone, maybe it’s you who doesn’t trust me?” He says accusingly. His words hit me hard, how can he possibly accuse me of being the one with trust issues when he’s the one who wasn’t honest with me about his brother. I tried to take Mimi’s advice and not make a big deal out of things, but I have a feeling that it’s not just his brother we’re talking about.

“Me? You’re being so absurd, you know I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt, but it just seems like it bit me in the ass somehow. You should’ve told me you had a brother, and for whatever reason, you didn’t trust me enough to tell me. We’re supposed to be a team, or at least I think so. I can’t really tell what we are right now. “I feel defeated, like a balloon that has released its last bit of oxygen.

“Why would I have to disclose anything about Ryder to you, if you don’t even know what we are? Of course were together, I told you, you’re my girl. I’m sorry I haven’t been around much. I lost you at the party and I heard about what Angela and Marie did to you.”

I take a step back giving him a quizzical look, what is he talking about? “What do you mean you heard what they did?”

“Well I heard about what Ryder said to you at the party. He didn’t mean it you know, he was set up, they told him you were looking for someone and you put out “easy” or whatever. I had no clue, and by the time I found out Ryder found me and told me about the issue. He also told me you punched him in the face.” He says that last part smiling down on me.

            I blush slightly ashamed of my actions. Had I known that it was a set up I wouldn’t have reacted that way. I should’ve known that those witches would do something like that.

            “He wouldn’t take no for an answer and honestly I wish I wouldn’t have had to find out like that. You know I have trust issues given everything that has happened to me. Plus, there’s more we need to talk about but I know now isn’t the time.” His hand rubs circles on my back, and for one second I let all the anger, pain and sadness seep out of me. I let his body take and absorb the pain.