Beneath This Man (30 page)

I inwardly groan. Am I even going now? ‘I don’t know, Jesse is supposed to be taking me shopping.’

‘Oh? He is, is he?’ she muses. ‘Make the most of old money bags.’

‘I’m not looking forward to it. I’ve not been there since last Sunday, and that pouty faced tramp will be there.’ I grumble. No doubt I’ll be receiving another warning. I sit back in my seat and think of all the other things I would prefer to do tomorrow night, and now Jesse is quite clearly raging with me, my enthusiasm has not lifted. It’s me who should be raging. He’s got some explaining to do in light of Mikael’s brainteaser.

We pull up outside my old flat, and I see Matt’s white BMW. My heart sinks, but I knew he would have to be here to let me in.

‘Do you want me to come in?’ Kate asks.

I mull over the question for a few seconds but decide it’s probably best if she waits in Margo. Kate is a feisty bugger when she wants to be, and all I have to do is get in, be polite and get out. I shall be quick about it as well.

‘No, I’ll bring it out to you.’ I open the van door and get out. I’m feeling sicker by the minute. Jesse’s already crazy mad over a stupid telephone call. I would call him unreasonable if it hadn’t been for Mikael’s line of conversation, but Jesse doesn’t know what was said, although his reaction speaks volumes.

I make my way up the steps and press the buzzer for our apartment, looking up at my building and feeling unexpectedly sad that I don’t live here anymore.

‘Hi.’ Matt’s happy voice comes over the intercom.

‘Hi.’ I say as informally as I can. I don’t want to get into friendly conversation with him. I’m still pissed he had the nerve to call my parents.

‘I’ll buzz you in.’

I hear the door mechanism release and I look back at Kate, giving a little wave to indicate I’m going in. She puts her thumb up and flashes her mobile at me. I nod my understanding and step into the corridor of the downstairs entrance hall.

Making my way up the stairs, I take calming breaths while giving myself a mental pep talk. I must not mention the call to my parents and I must not get involved in too much conversation.

When I reach the top, I see the front door open slightly. Shaking myself up, I walk straight in. I don’t shut the door; I don’t plan on being here long. I look in the kitchen and lounge for Matt, but he is nowhere to be seen, so I head for the bedroom and find my stuff piled in bags and boxes. With Matt nowhere to be found, I start collecting a few bags up in my hands, but when I turn to leave the room, I find Matt stood in the doorway with a glass of red wine in his hand. He’s wearing his beige suit. I’ve always hated that suit, not that I’ve told him. His dark hair is in its usual side parting and combed neatly.

‘Hi.’ he says on an over-the-top smile.

‘Hey, I looked for you.’ I explain as I lift the bags. ‘Kate’s waiting in her van. I’ll take these down to her.’ There’s no hiding the hostility that develops at the mention of Kate’s name, but I ignore it and walk with purpose to the door, stopping when he makes no attempt to get out of my way.

‘Excuse me.’ My politeness is killing me.

He smiles at me, then takes a cocky swig of his wine before standing back a fraction, giving me just enough room to slip past and make my way down to Kate. When she sees me emerging from the building, she jumps out of her van and runs around to open the back doors.

‘That was quick.’ she says, taking the bags from me.

‘He’s packed for me.’ I nod at the bags and raise a brow.   

She smirks. ‘That’s very civilised of him.’

I return to the apartment and grab a few more. It would be quicker if Kate came and got a few, but the pick-up has been quite straight forward and pain free up till now. Introducing Kate into the equation is a sure fire way to send the situation into anarchy, so I traipse back and forth, shifting my worldly possessions alone. I notice Matt doesn’t offer to help.

I hand my ninth and tenth bag to Kate. ‘How many more?’ She thrusts them in the van.

‘Just one box.’ I say on an about turn. He better have packed everything because I don’t want to come back.

I make my way back up and grab the final box, turning to make my hasty exit, but I find Matt blocking my escape again.

‘Ava, can we talk?’ he asks hopefully.

I cringe. ‘Talk about what?’ I know damn well what this is about. I need to get out of here. I can’t rehash this shit again. The last time I rejected his proposal to give it another shot, he turned nasty.

‘Us,’ He waves his hand between us.

‘Matt, I’m not going to change my mind.’ I say as surely as I can, but before I know what has happened, he’s on me trying to shove his tongue down my throat. I drop the box and use all the strength I possess to push him away from me. ‘What the hell are you doing?’ I screech incredulously.

He pants a bit and then scowls at me. ‘Reminding you of why we’re good together.’ he spits.

 I actually laugh. It’s a proper belly laugh. He’s reminding me? Of what? How much of a twat he is? Please! A Jesse style reminder it is
not
.

‘Are you still seeing someone?’ he asks.

‘That’s none of your business.’

‘No, but your parents were very interested.’ he snipes.

I take a long, steady breath to prevent my hand flying out and cracking him one. I’m not even going to justify his actions with a response. After the day I’ve had, this is the last thing I need. ‘Get out of my way, Matt.’ I’m immensely proud of myself for keeping my voice even.

‘You stupid cow.’ he sneers.

My eyes widen. I’m stunned. I knew he had a nasty streak, but is this really necessary? I see red. ‘Yes, I am seeing someone and do you know what, Matt?’ I don’t wait for him to ask. ‘He’s the best I’ve had.’ I say, stupidly or not.

He laughs a sly, slap worthy laugh. ‘He’s a raving alcoholic, Ava. Did you know that? He’s probably drunk out of his skull every time he fucks you.’

I falter and Matt’s cocky grin widens. How the hell does he know who I’m seeing? He thinks I’m shocked because he has just dropped the alcohol bombshell on me. No, I’m shocked because he must know who I’m seeing. How?

Oh God, I want to wipe his smug grin off his face with one swift slap. ‘Well, even pissed he’s a better fuck than you ever were.’ I toss at him and watch as his smug face turns to confusion.

The bastard thought he had one over on me. Those words have achieved far more than a slap ever would. I’m delighted with myself for being so quick off the mark. He always liked to think he was handy in the bedroom. He wasn’t.

I can see him struggling, clearly wondering how he should deal with me. I stand my ground, but I’m still curious how the hell he knows about Jesse.

‘You’re pathetic.’ he snarls.

‘No Matt. I’m making up for four years of shit sex with you.’

His face drops a little. He doesn’t know what to say. I lean down to get the box from the floor and whip my head up when I hear the thunder of heavy footsteps charging up the stairs.

Oh fuck!

‘Ava!’ he roars.

Any hope I had of leaving Matt and his bewildered expression kind of commotion free has been well and truly trampled. How does he know I’m here? I’ll kill Kate if she’s tattled on me.

He comes bulldozing through the door and any notion I had that I’ve seen him in all of his challenging ways has just been thoroughly obliterated. He’s rampant, and I’m actually afraid. Not for myself, for Matt, and I hate him. Jesse looks capable of murder.

He doesn’t pay any attention to Matt. He looks straight at me and I wilt under his intense, furious stare. ‘What the FUCK are you doing here?’ he shouts.

I physically tremble in my heels. I’ve really waved a red rag under his irate nose this time. He’s not supposed to know I’m here. How the hell does he know I’m here? Has he got a tracker on me? I elect not to ask, though. Instead, I stand with my mouth firmly shut.

‘Answer me!’ he roars.

I flinch. It’s pretty obvious what I’m doing here, he doesn’t need my confirmation, and he must have seen the bags in the back of Kate’s van.

Matt wisely stands back and keeps his cocky mouth shut. His eyes are flicking from me to Jesse, and I know he’s thinking that this is not the behaviour of a man just
fucking
a woman.

Hey, meet my God!

‘I fucking told you! Don’t ring him, don’t come here. I said John would do it!’ He waves his arms around like a deranged screwball. ‘Go and get in the fucking car.’

I hear a snigger escape Matt’s lips, and I whip my eyes around to him. He looks at me and I see a glint of sick satisfaction in his eyes. It tips me over the edge. I’m not standing here being screamed at, especially in front of my twat of an ex-boyfriend. I grab my box and steam out of my apartment, thanking all things holy that Jesse didn’t walk in a few seconds earlier.

‘We kissed.’ I hear Matt’s smug voice and then Jesse’s unmistakable fist in his face.

I could cry. Does Matt not know when to shut the fuck up? I hear Jesse’s thumping footsteps behind me as I walk out onto the street and see Kate and Sam – oh, and John too.

John’s leaning up against his Range Rover – wraparound sunglasses in place – looking as menacing as ever, but his face is completely impassive, while Kate is pacing besides her van with Sam standing to the side looking a bit concerned.  Is it really necessary for everyone to be here? I give her a
don’t
stare as I approach her.

She takes the box from me. ‘Holy fucking shit, Ava.’ she whispers, throwing it in the back of her van.

‘Did you tell Sam I was here?’ I ask shortly.

‘No!’ she screeches. I believe her. She wouldn’t do that to me.

‘John!’ Jesse yells as he emerges from my building. ‘Put her stuff in the Rover.’ He shakes his recovering hand and a flash of concern twangs inside me. The bloody idiot. Couldn’t he have used his left hand? And then his referral to me registers.

Her?

‘Leave it John!’ I shout, halting John in his tracks. ‘I’m not going with him. Kate, come on.’ I start towards the passenger side of Kate’s van and when I get to the door, I look up and see Sam with his hand on Kate’s arm. She looks at Sam and he shakes his head faintly, then she looks back to me. I can see she is torn.

‘Get the bags, John!’ Jesse thunders down the steps.

‘Leave them!’ I shout.

I see John blow out an exasperated breath of air and look at Jesse for guidance, but he must decide that my wrath is the lesser of two evils because he starts transferring my things into the Range Rover. He can take my things. It doesn’t mean I’m going. I get in Kate’s van and throw myself back in the seat in total aggravation. 

Within two seconds, the door is flung open. ‘Out!’ His voice is shaking with anger. I couldn’t give a toss.

I grab the handle to yank it shut, but he moves his body to block me. ‘Jesse. Just fuck off!’

‘Mouth!’

‘FUCK OFF!’ I scream. My throat is sore, my vocal cords pleading for some calmness. I’ve never shouted so much. I’m shaking, trembling with fury. How dare he? How dare he behave like this after everything I’ve been through with him.

‘Watch your fucking mouth!’ He leans in and grabs me.

I fight him off, but my strength compared to his is pathetic. He manhandles me out of Margo Junior and stands me with my back facing his front, while I persistently struggle to bat him away. He wraps an arm around my waist and lifts me clean from the ground, carrying me to his car while I kick and scream like a three year old.

‘Get off me!’

‘Shut your filthy mouth, Ava.’ he grates, which only assists in encouraging me to fight him some more.

I’m being manhandled in the middle of Notting Hill under the observation of my best mate, her boyfriend and John. I’m mortified! I can’t believe he has gone off the rails like this. I was handling it fine. I was on my way out, and then neurotic arse here rocked up and threw the shit right in the fan. I want to throw my head back and scream to the heavens.

I wriggle a little more and try and prize his arm from around my waist.

‘Stop making a scene, Ava.’ he warns.

Looking up, I see numerous bystanders halted in their daily business, all watching the dramatic happenings unfolding before their eyes.  I give in with my struggle, but mainly because I’m thoroughly exhausted. I let him bundle me into his car, batting my arms at him when he tries to put the seatbelt on me.

He grabs my chin and tugs my face to his. ‘You had better stay fucking put!’ His green eyes are brimming with fury as I stare at him defiantly before pulling my face away. I sit in the warm, black leather trying to catch my breath.

I am
not
going to The Manor tomorrow night and I
am
going to the pub on Saturday. I’m also moving out of
Lusso
, not that I really moved in, although Jesse would completely disagree with that.  

I see him walk back over to John, Kate and Sam. They’re talking, but I have no idea what about. Jesse’s head drops and I see Kate place a hand on his arm. It’s a reassuring gesture. She’s a fucking traitor! Why is he the one getting all of the sympathy and reassurance when I’m the one who’s just been abducted by a wild fucking maniac?

John shakes his head and clips the side of Jesse’s jaw with his knuckles, but Jesse pulls back from it harshly. I lip read John’s
calm down
and watch as Jesse walks away, throwing his arms in the air before yanking his dark blonde, disheveled hair in frustration. John shakes his head and this time I know he just said
mother fucker
.

Good! This is an indication that John agrees with me. Nasty qualities, I think John said. You don’t get much nastier than this. He’s completely lost the plot.

I look out of the passenger window when he climbs back in the car. I’m not talking to him. He’s gone too far this time. He starts the car and roars off down the road, flinging me back in my seat. His normal driving mood is frightening enough. I’m not looking forward to this journey.

‘How did you know I was here?’ I keep my eyes firmly on the view whizzing past my window.