Beneath The Lies (27 page)

I gasp. “Kate, if he ever sees you, he’ll know. He’ll know you’re his daughter and God help everyone in his path if that happens, because what Damian wants, Damian gets.”

Gavin’s grip is so tight that he’s almost cutting off the circulation in my hand. “Kate, I want you to know...that giving you up was the hardest decision of my life. The only thing that kept me moving forward was the knowledge that your parents were amazing people who deserved a baby to love. Originally, your parents were going to keep me updated with pictures and milestones, but after Hayden went missing we all agreed that couldn’t happen.”

Ten minutes ago, I didn’t think there was anything this woman could say that would justify her actions, but somehow she did. “I love you, Kate. You’re one of my greatest accomplishments in life. You changed me; it was because of you that I decided to make a good life for myself and stop making one crappy choice after another. I may not be your mother, I didn’t raise you but you’ve always been a part of me. There hasn’t been a day in the last twenty years that I haven’t thought about you.”

I didn’t realize how much I truly missed my mother until this moment. Stacy’s words almost echo what my mother said to me when she knew she was close to dying.

“I may not have given birth to you, but you were born to be my daughter and now I get to thank God personally for giving you to me.”

“Thank you. I don’t know if you’ll ever know how much I needed to hear that.”

Stacy starts to relax and even manages to give me a real smile. “No, thank you, Kate. I would love for you to meet my husband and children if that’s something you’d like to do. I don’t think Damian still watches me. I don’t think he feels he has any reason to, but I understand if you’re not comfortable with it.”

I glance over at Gavin who nods his head yes. “Sure. Do they...know about me?”

“Yes, sort of. They know I gave up a child when I was younger, but I didn’t go into any details. My sister and I had already grown apart long before Hayden was kidnapped, so they don’t know much about my side of the family.

“How long are you in town for?”

We didn’t want to leave Callie any longer than necessary, and when I left I didn’t think I would want to spend a second longer than I had to with Stacy, but suddenly I wish I was staying longer.

“We leave tomorrow. Gavin has a four-year-old daughter that we need to get back to.”

Stacy takes a deep breath. “Tonight then. I’ll introduce you to them tonight.”

Her words are rushed, like she needed to get them out before she could chicken out. “Only if you’re sure.”

“I’ve thought about you every day for the last twenty years, Kate. I’m sure. I’m more than sure,” she firmly adds.

Gavin replies before I have the chance to. “Well, let’s head to the hotel to clean up and then we’ll be back later tonight.”

Stacy nods her head and smiles at me. “Tonight.”

****

By the time we return to Stacy’s my hands are shaking and my stomach is turning. Earlier I had learned that I had two brothers, ages seventeen, sixteen, and a fourteen-year-old sister.

Stacy, who actually goes by Kelly now—and has ever since my father gave her money to restart her life—was at the door waiting on us when we returned. “Come in. The family is excited to meet you.”

We walk in and immediately a cute, blonde teenage girl comes out to greet us. Once she spots Gavin, she seems to only have eyes for him.

“This is Brianna, or Bri, as we typically call her.”

“Nice to meet you.” Yep, she has a classic case of love at first sight. Thankfully for me, he’s ten years older than her and already in love with me.

Bri shakes both of our hands when two older boys walk into the room. “These are my sons Sean and Mason.” Sean is oldest and seems quite sure of himself, at least if the smile on his face is anything to go by. Mason, however, still has a baby face and looks like he might be shy, at least compared to his older brother.

All three of them have the same blonde hair as Kelly and...me.

A nice looking but slightly older man walks up to Kelly and puts his arm around her waist. “This is Greg Freeman, my husband.” Greg looks both of us over, but he does it in a fatherly way, and he seems to approve.

“Nice to meet you. Come in and let’s eat,” he says after shaking Gavin’s hand and giving me a big hug.

Throughout dinner I learn a lot about the Freemans. Greg is a surgeon and Kelly is a realtor. Their house still screams money, but the longer I’m here the more homey it feels. You can tell how much Greg and Kelly love their children, and everyone seems to have already accepted me.

The two boys love to argue over anything and everything, which has Bri constantly rolling her eyes, and both Gavin and I fighting off laughter.

As dinner rolls on, I catch myself wondering what life would have been like if Stacy had kept me. Would I be their older sister sitting here enjoying a meal with them? Or maybe life would have turned out horribly wrong for Stacy, who’s now happily Kelly Freeman. She might have missed out on this wonderful life she’s built. Not to mention, I would have missed out knowing my wonderful parents. With that thought, I know tonight confirms that everything happened exactly the way it was meant to.

Meeting Gavin started my heart on the path to healing, but being here now with not only him but with the Freeman’s, my heart finally feels like it’s home again.

Gavin and I returned to Berkley the next day as planned. I could tell he was worried about Kiran keeping Callie any longer than we originally planned, and truthfully...I don’t have a place in the Freeman’s life, at least not yet.

Not to mention, I need to get back to school. I’m thankful for all the time I worked ahead, but if I miss many more classes I’ll risk not graduating on time.

“Where were you yesterday?”

I glance over my shoulder and see Alyssa. This is the first time I’ve seen her since the night she ditched me to take off to that fight. “Out of town.”

She can tell by my clipped tone that I’m angry with her. “I’m sorry, Kate. I wasn’t myself that week and it caused me to act without thinking. I never should have left you and never should have gone to that fight. I was pissed when Kyler showed up to get me, but once I sobered up I was grateful that he did. At the same time, I was horrified at how I treated you.”

Alyssa genuinely appears remorseful. I’ve never been one to hold a grudge and I don’t plan to start now. “What’s going on with you? Why were you hell bent on going to that fight?”

Alyssa’s shoulders sag with defeat. “Gabby told me she told you about Shane—my high school boyfriend. Well, that Friday was his birthday. He would have been twenty-one. We had plans, things we were going to do after we graduated, and my life since he died...well, I think he would be disappointed in me, if he could see me now.”

Alyssa’s voice is soft and definitely sad. “No, he wouldn’t, Alyssa. The two of you had plans and his death changed those plans. Neither of you could have prepared for that. What do you think would have happened if the roles were reversed? If you had died and left him to grieve, wouldn’t you want everyone to give him time and even the right to change his plans for the future?”

Alyssa swallows loudly, but otherwise remains quiet. “Death changes a person. What we once thought we wanted or knew can be gone in a second. Alyssa, you’re young and you have the right to move on without feeling guilty. I never met this guy—”

“Shane. His name was Shane,” Alyssa replies firmly. I’ve seen the way Alyssa looks at guys. They’re interchangeable, but that’s not the case with Shane. Even years later he holds a spot in her heart.

“I never met Shane, but I know he doesn’t want you going out searching for a guy who’ll treat you any different than he did. Life moves on and Shane would want you to find a nice guy, someone that will treat you right.”

Alyssa’s eyes are focused off in the distance. “Like Kyler?”

I wait for her to look back at me before answering. “If you like Kyler, then sure. He seems like a good guy. But if you don’t, then just tell him that before he invests anymore feelings, because it sounds like he does care about you.”

A small smile crosses Alyssa’s face. “Yeah. I think he does, and he’s a good person. In a way he reminds me a lot of Shane. I think that’s why I never gave him a second thought when I first met him.”

I watch as Alyssa takes in a deep breath and seems to find her confidence. “I feel much better. Thank you, Kate. Even though you let me off the hook earlier, I want you to know I really am sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. That’s what friends are for.” Alyssa didn’t respond, instead she smiles and grabs her bag and heads off to class, leaving me with a smile of my own.

****

Gavin and I have been back from Seattle now for close to two weeks. During that time, I’ve debated searching Damian Paasch on the internet, but today at the library when I had half an hour to kill waiting for my next class to begin, I finally caved and searched his name.

Tons of articles pop up. Everything from FBI reports to news clippings about various drug related charges that all seem to stem back to him.

After about ten minutes of reading meaningless articles, I finally find one that reads more like a bio than a report. Damian Paasch is forty-two. He’s the American son of Michael and Dianna Paasch, and was born in Austin, Texas, but later moved to Mexico with his father Michael in attempts to evade the FBI when his father was accused of drug and gun trafficking.

Damian’s mother died when he was a small child and his father died about a year before I was born. That was the same time that Damian inherited his father’s empire. Now it seems that it’s Damian who’s evading the police and the many outstanding charges the U.S. government has pending against him.

The whole time I’m reading I feel like any other outsider would: detached from the people I’m reading about. When I see an image of Damian Paasch, my heart stops when I take in the exact same green eyes I see every time I look into the mirror.

According to Stacy, my parents knew exactly who my biological father was, which explains their constant need to shelter me. To ensure that pictures were never made public and I always kept a low profile.

Damian Paasch is a beautiful man. In this picture, which says it was taken almost a year ago, he has short brown hair. Pair his dominant cheekbones and emerald eyes and he makes for a gorgeous man that doesn’t look a day over thirty.

I wonder what kind of father he is. If he’s good to Hayden, or if he’s really the evil drug lord the internet and Stacy make him out to be.

My phone beeps at me, reminding me that my class is about to begin. I log off and quickly leave the library, my thoughts now stuck on two people somewhere in Mexico.

****

A week later, I can hear my phone ringing as I am getting out of the shower and I almost miss the call. “Hello.”

“Kate? Is that you?”

I believe the number on my caller ID is an outgoing number for my dad’s company, so I felt safe answering. “Yes, this is Kate.”

“Kate, this is Ned Murphy. I sent you that envelope that I found in your father’s office but it was returned labeled a wrong address.”

Oh, crap. I’ve forgotten all about Ned sending me something. “I’m sorry, Ned. I unexpectedly moved again. I’ll call the main office and update my information.”

“Oh. Okay. Is everything alright, Kate?” I can hear the concern in his voice. I’ve moved three times in the last few months, which is very unlike me.

“Everything is fine, Ned. I decided to move in with someone else to help free up more money from the trust my dad left me.”

“Oh? Did he not leave you enough to finish paying for school?”

“No. Dad’s lawyer emailed to tell me I didn’t have enough in my tuition account to cover the rest of my schooling. I was thinking about selling some of my stock to come up with the difference.”

“No. No, please, Kate. Don’t do that. Your father thought it would be good for the company if he took it public, and that was one of his biggest professional regrets. The last time we spoke, which wasn’t long before he passed, he told me you’d have enough in your account to graduate. If that’s no longer the case, I’ll personally loan you the money you’ll need and you can repay me when you earn your diploma.”

Wow. Ned must not be too worried about me riding in and taking over if he’s willing to ensure I can graduate by personally loaning me the money.

“Thank you, Mr. Murphy. I might actually take you up on that. My boyfriend claims he’s going to take care of it, but I know coming up with the amount of money that’s needed won’t be easy for him.”

“Boyfriend?”

Damn, I had not realized the door I just opened from my carefree remark. “Yes. His name is Gavin Loman.”

“Loman? James Loman’s son?”

Again I forgot whom I was talking to. “Yes.”

Ned clears his throat. “Your father would love that. James meant the world to him, and I bet that boy would do just about anything to make sure you graduate, but let me help out. You’ll have the funds to repay me after you’re done with school. I’m certain that account is linked to the company so I’ll transfer more than enough.”