Beautifully Broken (23 page)

“Damn
it!” I slam my palm into the door next to her face and she flinches. After a
few silent seconds I pull the door knob and she moves with little effort. I
slam the door behind me ignoring the worried stares I receive from Harris and
Lillian as I pass them on my way to the elevator.

Isabella

A
large hand yanks me backwards while I’m having my morning chat with Lillian and
Rich. I’m stunned to see a seething Liam glaring down at me. I try to yank my
arm away but he’s too strong.

“We
need to talk now.” he says through gritted teeth, pulling me towards my office
when a concerned Lillian intercepts.

“Wait,”
Lillian shouts, grabbing his arm. Cleary frightened by his demeanor. “Maybe you
should calm down first.”

“Stay
out of this Lillian” he says softly, trying to calm her apprehension.

Rich
tries to step in when Lillian’s attempt fails, “Mr. Maddox I don’t think you
should be man-handling-”

“Mind
your fucking business Harris,” Liam snaps at him, daring Rich to challenge him
with his manic glare. I decide it would be best to remain silent until we get
into my office. An all out brawl between my boyfriend, the boss, and Rich will
end in catastrophe. This is a business and I don’t want our personal life to
affect my co-workers.

The
second he releases my arm I rush to my desk not wanting to be in direct contact
with his anger. “Liam we just had the most perfect morning, what the fuck is
the matter with you?” I say leaning forward with my palms against the desk. He
copies my pose on the opposite side, challenging me to make a wrong move as he
throws the pile of papers in front of me. My eyes dart the picture and I think
my heart stopped beating for a couple seconds. The fact that I kept this from
Liam has come back to haunt me in the worse possible way.

I
flip through the pictures pausing at the article, keenly aware of Liam’s fiery
gaze burning through my bent head. The implications in the article are backed
up by the misinterpreted photographs. I bite on my lip as I glance at him, pain
and anger warring in his beautiful eyes. I hate that I hurt him like this; I’m
not sure how to get him to believe anything I say when I’ve already lied to
him.

“You
told me you can’t believe everything these people publish Liam,” I say hoping
to make him realize the article is just media entertainment.

“Maybe
I can’t believe everything they say but the pictures, the pictures are real.
That’s you with the same outfit you wore yesterday.
The same fucking shirt I
ripped off your body this morning!”
He shouts at me. I fight back the tears
brimming in my eyes.

I
don’t cry.

Never
cry.
I remind myself but I can feel myself losing him,
the fear shaking me to the core as I watch him moving towards the door. I race
forward desperate to fix this, blocking his exit with my body against the door.

“Please
just listen to me; I know I should have told you about Cayden, I ‘m sorry.”

“Cayden,”
he says his name like something repulsive. “How cozy you two were in that
cafe.”

“I
swear to you nothing is going on. I ran into him once while I was out with
Lillian and I met him for lunch yesterday, that’s it.” I plead, staring into
his cold eyes knowing I’m not getting through.

“Why’d
you meet with him?” He grunts at me showing his first sign of pain. If I tell
him I needed Cayden it will hurt him worst but I refuse to lie to him any
further.

 “He
asked me to meet with him after he helped me out with the panic attack I had
the other day in the bathroom.” I say lowering my head not able to bare the
shattered look in his face.

 “You
called on him instead of me?” his voice quivering with each word. I nod my head
turning to look at him.

“Damn
it!” I flinch as his hand slams against the door so furiously the sound will
probably have Rich and Lillian racing back here. His heavy animal like puffs of
breath blow against my cheek, wild eyes settling on mine in disbelief. He’s so
close to me I ache to touch him, comfort him but I repress the urge. I feel the
door nudging my back and step aside, crumbling to the floor at the sound of the
door slamming.

Heavy
footsteps race down the hall and burst through the door as I remain seated on
the floor, frozen. Rich kneels down in front of me gently holding my face
between his hands, gazing into my eyes.

“Isabella
are you all right? I swear if he hurt you…”

“Stop.”
I manage to say before he jumps to conclusions. “He didn’t hurt me, I hurt
him.”

His
eyebrows furrow in confusion. He pulls me into his arms comforting me while Lillian’s
hands caress my hair. My head tells me this is the part where I let it out and
cry but I feel surprisingly numb. I begin to shut down the emotions attempting
to plague my heart. I push Rich off, slowly rising up and walk to my desk.

“Go
back to work.” I say trying not to focus on the scattered pictures on my desk.
I want to pretend like nothing happened and I’m still as blissfully happy as I
was a couple hours ago. I sweep my arm across the desk, the offending photos
scattering on the floor. Rich picks one up and looks back at me with pity in
his eyes. I don’t want his pity, I want him to get the fuck out and leave me in
my misery.

Lillian
peeks at the picture he’s holding then gasps. She picks up the other photos
pausing to read the small article. She walks to me shaking her head, tossing
them into the trash. She sits on the edge of my desk closest to me.

“What
happened? You’ll feel better if you talk about it.” She says. I’m not good at
this friendship stuff so opening up may not be an option. With Lucas I never
let him see these kinds of flaws in me so I never needed to talk about my
problems, I just buried them where no one could see. My whole life’s been
turned into a series of change, so I take a deep breath deciding to let my
friends help me.

“Cayden’s
just a friend, he helped me through a few panic attacks and I was just thanking
him. I didn’t tell Liam about this meeting or calling Cayden when I needed
help.” I explain. “He’s so furious at me, probably more so for turning to
another man. I know how possessive Liam is so I tried to keep this from him.
Huh…he always has a way of revealing the truth about me, lying has never been
an option with Liam.” I cover my face trying to clear the image of Liam’s
distraught face. His pain radiates through me, leaving a knot in the pit of my
stomach

“I’ll
be honest,” Rich says. “As a guy, if I was dating you and this surfaced I’d be
really hurt also but just give him time. You’re a fantastic woman and there’s
no man that would give you up without a fight.” He squeezes my arm, half
smiling at me.

“I
agree, I’ve known Liam for years and have never seen him express that kind of passion
towards anything or anyone.” Her hand caresses my hair like a mother does her
child. “He loves you Isabella, he’ll forgive you.”

The
rest of the workday is a bust. My mind can’t stay focused long enough to be
efficient. Around 4 o’clock I decided to leave, ignoring the looks of pity from
my office mates. I hate pity. I don’t want to be pitied. I take a cab home
since I rode in with Liam this morning hoping to have a little time to think
before he gets home.

I
soak in the tub for almost an hour hoping it will relieve some of my tension
but it doesn’t work. Hours pass and night falls, by one in the morning a
feeling of dread sets in. The churning in my gut increases as thought of him
downstairs with Arianna plagues my mind. I grab my phone and hit his speed
dial.

“Heyy…”
he answers in an oddly jubilant tone.

“Liam
where are you?”

“Some…bar,”
I hear shuffling sounds, then definite female giggling.

“What
bar, I’m coming to get you.” I snap, pissed that he’s at a bar giggling with
some skank while I’m here pacing like a caged animal.

“I
don’t want…don’t come.” More shuffling then a voice asks who he’s talking to.
“My girlfriend” he answers. Well thank god I’m still his girlfriend.

“Liam
please, you’re too drunk to drive let me pick you up.” I beg him.

“No,”
he says clearly. “Hurts too much…can’t…look…at you”

That
irritating woman asks him if he’s there to talk to his girl or have fun. Her
voice so clear I know she’s practically in his lap. “Don’t worry honey, I’ll
take care of him for you tonight.” She says to me before the line goes dead.
Heat rushes to my face and my hands clench into fist. That slut is going to
take advantage of Liam’s vulnerability and I don’t have a clue how to find him.
Fuck!
I know I brought this unto myself but I can’t take Liam sleeping
with another woman as equal punishment for not telling him about Cayden. If he
sleeps with that skank we’re done.

********

Liam
never came home.

I
spend a restless night of tossing and turning, falling asleep just to jerk back
awake from dreams of Liam fucking some random woman. I cake on concealer under
my eyes to hide the bags before jumping in my convertible to head to work. I
get there almost two hours early and let out a sigh of relief when I see Liam’s
car. I use my keys to gain access to his floor, relieved that no one’s at
reception yet.

I
slide my key into the slot next to Liam’s office door and it slides open. The
office is eerily quiet and empty. He has to be here if his car is downstairs. I
make my way to the back suite and hear faint music playing behind the door. I open
the door to a darkened suite. The early morning sun is just peeking at the
horizon giving off a slight glow in the room. King of Leon wails about how he
can use somebody. I nervously approach the bed noticing a hump, praying that
some woman isn’t wrapped up in his strong arms.

I
flick on the bedside lamp noticing his iPod is set to repeat on the speaker
dock. I shut it off pulling the covers from his naked body. I practically cry
when I find him alone. He flinches, covering his eyes from the light with his
arm. He moans and mumbles incoherently, trying to reach for the sheets.

“Liam
it’s me.” I say lowering my head to his level.

“Ella”
he groans without uncovering his eyes.

“Yeah
baby, I’m here. I missed you last night. Why didn’t you come home?” I ask watching
him uncover his face to squint at me.

“I
can’t deal with you right now, you need to leave,” he says hoarsely.

“Liam
please. Let’s talk about this. Don’t you want to work this out?” I caress his
disheveled hair, he catches my arm mid stoke glaring at me.

“Ella…I’ve
never been drunk a day in my life all of a sudden I find myself spiraling out
of control because of you. My head is about to explode and all I can see right
now is you embracing that man so I’ll say this one last time. I. Can’t. Deal.
With. You. Now.” He reaches over turning the music back on before pulling the
blankets over his head, dismissing me.

Liam

The
hot water pounds my back washing away the alcoholic smell seeping from my
pores. After Isabella left sleep evaded me, her smell taunted me until I ripped
the sheets off and jumped in the shower. I refuse to let today be a re-run of
yesterday. After storming out of that office I operated in a zombie-like
trance. Nodding and murmuring through meetings not absorbing any information.
Gabby took over in the middle of the first meeting giving me a compassionate
look. Once the work day was over I knew going home was not an option. Staying
in my suite all night would have pulled me further into my mind so I left.

I
wandered around the city aimlessly trying to decide how I let myself get so
wrapped up I can’t even function without her. I stopped into the first loud bar
I saw and ordered drink after drink never letting my glass empty out. A tall
brunette woman with voluptuous breast wearing a provocative dress sat in the
stool next to me. Her flirting was endless; she rubbed up against me so many
times I had to physically hold her off.

I
knew I’d had too much as I fumbled with my phone trying to focus on the screen.
I got fed up with my bar mate when she hung up on Ella so I got up and left.
Unfortunately she followed me insisting that I should crash at her place. I
shook my head at her desperate attempt and walked away leaving her gaping at
me.

Going
home and laying next to Ella was not an option; she would lure me back into her
web with her sweet caresses and sexy body. Once I got into my suite I stripped,
got into bed and feel asleep instantly. My drunken stupor chasing away all
conscious thought.

********

I
fell into business mode pretending to forget about Ella but I ache to see her
face. Gabby apologized for giving me the article as if it was her fault Ella
was forming a relationship with another man. What I thought was a pretty
moderate day turned dreadful when Jessica informed me through the speaker
system that my father was here to see me. I grudgingly mumble for her to let
him in.