Beautiful Outlaw (7 page)

“Hopefully, I won’t be gone long.”

She looks into my eyes, reminding me of when I was younger and about to get a talking to.  “While you’re gone, I want you to think about your life.  Not the club, not your brothers, just you.  I saw the way you looked at Shay, and I also saw the way she looked at you.  She’s a good woman,
hijo
.”

“Too damn good for me,” I mumble out the words that have been rolling around in my head since the moment she crawled onto my bike and wrapped her arms around me. 

“No, she’s not,” Nina says, with a shake of her head.  “You don’t have to quit being you if you want her.  You don’t have to leave the club. You just have to quit partaking in some of the benefits.”

I fidget in my seat, hating to talk to her about this shit.  Club whores are not a discussion you want to have with the woman you consider your mother.  Granted, I was nearly grown when she took me in; she was and is still more of a mom that my own ever was. 

Nina met my bastard father when she was only seventeen.  A year later, she gave birth to Tin-Man.  Just like my own mother, Nina was nothing more than a piece on the side to Cash.  The big difference was that she didn’t know it.  Dad set her up in a run-down trailer, not far from the clubhouse.  She thought he loved her, thought he was trying to make a life with her, but couldn’t be around a lot because he was busy at the club.  My father, on the other hand, thought of her as nothing more than an easy lay. 

Living at the clubhouse since I was just a kid, I knew all about Nina.  The guys would give Cash shit about his
spic
whore all the fuckin’ time, he would just laugh it off or make some fucked up comment about her, but he still went back for more.  At the time, their words didn’t mean shit to me. I didn’t know her, so I didn’t care.

Even though I had heard of her, I had never laid eyes on her until I was nearly thirteen.  She stopped by the clubhouse to give Cash an ultimatum.  Either start coming home at night or don’t come home at all.  By the time she left, he made sure she understood that his only home was the clubhouse and the only reason he ever stopped by her shitty trailer was to get a piece of ass.

I watched her walk out the door with her head held high, as tears streamed down her face.  For some reason, I followed her.  When I did, I saw my younger brother for the first time, a brother I didn’t even know I had. After that, I never let anyone mutter the word
spic
around me again.  I took a hell of a lot of ass whippings from the members over it, but I gave quite a few too. 

When I was nearly seventeen, one of the club whores gave birth to my sister.  The bitch didn’t want anything to do with her child when she realized that giving the Pres a kid wouldn’t gain her anything. She dumped Priss in my lap and hit the road.  Not knowing what to do, but knowing Dad wouldn’t help, I went to Nina’s carrying my sister in my arms.  She took the baby; she also took me in.  I never spent another night in the clubhouse, until I got out of the military.

Shaking my head in an attempt to get myself back on the present, I stand up.   “I’ve gotta hit the road.”

She stands up too, pulling me in for a hug.  “Love you,
hijo
.  Ride safe.”

“Love you too,
Mamá
.”

Home Again

Bowie

Smoke whirls in the air and the familiar scent of weed reaches my nose as I walk into the clubhouse.  The sun is barely up, and all the brothers are already having a hell of a time. Good to see nothing has changed, while I was gone.   If it had, I might have thought someone gave a shit.  That would’ve been a mistake. 

I walk past the members, without bothering to acknowledge one of them.  I can feel anger coursing through me as I walk behind the bar and grab a beer. As I pass a prospect holding a tray full of empties, he motions toward my bottle.  “I could’ve got that for you.”

I glare at his ass, too pissed to respond, and make my way to an empty table.  My ass has barely hit the seat, when I see Tin-Man walk through the door.  He looks at me and relief flashes across his face.  His eyes fly to our dickhead father, before coming back to me.  I lift my chin, letting him know we need to have words. 

He walks over and slaps me on the back.  “Bet you’re glad to be home,
Hermano
.  I know I’m glad to see your ass.”

“You don’t even know, Tin,” I mumble out, feeling the stress of the trip finally fading away.

“Did you get everything straightened out?” My brother asks as he takes the seat next to mine. 

“What do you think?” I growl out, letting my anger show. 

The two-week run to Alabama turned into nearly four long months on the road.  What started out as a simple gun transport turned into a fuckin’ battle when the Crazy Sixes got involved.  I spent endless hours trying to negotiate with them, but we’re no closer to any sort of peace than we were when we started.

“I think the entire club is a fucked up mess.  What I want to know is did you get us out of it.” He’s more to the point this time.

“I don’t know.  I think there’s still trouble heading our way.  The Sixes want our supply route cut off.  If guns are gonna be ran through their territory, they want to be the one doing it.”

He shrugs, placing his own beer on the table.  “We’d feel the same way.  Do you think Cash would be letting some other mother-fuckers come to our home and pull the shit he’s trying to pull on them?”

Just the mention of our father causes anger to rush through me.  I look around the clubhouse, making sure no one is close enough to hear, then lean closer to my brother.  “He didn’t give a shit that Rollo and me were stuck up there in enemy territory.  I think the fucker used us as a diversion to bring the guns in through another route.”

“What the fuck?”  Anger is easily heard in his voice.  It’s the same anger that I heard when he called to say he wouldn’t be heading to Alabama to help me out.  Not that there was much he could do to help me, but he wanted to be by my side. 

Lowering my voice even more, I explain what happened.  “We rode ahead of the truck, checking out the place just like always; we got to the drop off about an hour before they were supposed to be there.  As soon as we pulled up to the warehouse, Kilo and his boys came out packing.”

We were beyond fuckin’ lucky the Sixes President didn’t want an all-out war.  Kilo could have taken us out right then, but he decided to talk it out instead.  Granted, some of the talking included fists but at least Rollo and I walked away breathing. 

“Was it a set up?” He asks, thinking the same thing I did as soon as I saw the guns pointed at me and Rollo.

“I can’t be sure, but I think so.” I say, with a shake of my head.  “The truck never showed up, but somehow the guns ended up in the right hands.”

“Toke was driving the truck.” He states, telling me something I already know.

“Yeah, and he’s so far up the old man’s ass that he couldn’t find his way out with a damn map.”

Tin-Man stares at me for second, before his eyes move across the room to where our father is sitting by his right hand man.  “Did you ask Toke what the fuck happened?”

“He says they sent someone ahead, when they couldn’t get us to answer the phone. The lookout saw that shit wasn’t right, so they changed drop off points.” I hesitate, letting him know there is more.

He moves his eyes back to me, raising a brow.  “But?”

“Red was in the truck with him.” I shoot him a look that tells him I would trust our friend over Toke any day.  “He said the drop off spot changed nearly three hours before they lost contact with us.”

“Fuck, man.” He mutters, running a nervous hand over his nearly bald head.  “You’re not only his VP; you’re his son.  You could have been killed. Do you really think Cash would do that to you?”

I shrug, not sure of the answer.  “I hope to hell not, but I don’t know.  I think the old man would do anything for money.”

My brother lifts his brow, cutting his eyes across the room.  I follow them, finding our father staring at us.  “I think this is a conversation best had somewhere else.”

“I agree, need to talk to you about something else anyway.”

“What’s up,” I ask, taking another drink. 

He lifts his own bottle, letting the prospect know he needs another.  “What do you got planned for Shay?”

Shit!  That is one name I didn’t want to hear today.  The entire time I was gone, I thought of one thing and one thing only, Shay. The words Nina said to me played on a continuous loop in my head.   The woman’s got my brain so fuckin’ warped, I don’t know which way is up. 

She’s just not my type; I’m not in to up tight bitches.  I like blonde hair, huge tits, and a loud personality. I want a woman that will ride on my bitch seat and enjoy every minute of it, not some woman that looks like she belongs in a limousine. 

“How’s she doing?” I ask, unable to keep the interest I feel out of my voice. 

He smiles, a smile that has me wanting to jump across the table and rip his damn head off.  “She’s doing just fine, fine as hell to my eyes.”

“You better not fuck with her, brother.”

He shakes his head, letting out a laugh.  “If I had the chance, I wouldn’t just fuck her.  That is one woman I’d make love to all damn night.”

I slam my beer bottle onto the table, causing the glass to shatter.  “Stay the hell away from her, Tin.  I mean it, this is one woman we won’t be sharing.”

He loses his smile, as he stares at me.  “If you want her, you better get your ass in gear.  Every brother that stops by
Mamá’s
wants a go at her.”

“It ain’t happening.  She’s Lock’s sister; she’s untouchable to the club.”

I’m not the only veteran wearing club colors.  Hell, half the damn club served at one time or another.  The brotherhood understands the bonds that are formed with your fellow soldiers. They may not know Lock or anything about the situation with Shay, but they know she is related to one of my army buddies and they know that she means something to me.  The brothers do a lot of things, but they’d never cross that line. 

“They wouldn’t if they just wanted a piece of ass, but Shay isn’t the kind of woman you fuck and run.  I think some of them would gladly give her their patch.”

“Fuck that, it’s not going to happen.”

Tin-Man pushes his chair back and stands up.  Looking down at me, he smiles.  “It will, if you don’t do anything to stop it.”

I watch him walk away, as I stand up.  Fuck, guess I better go check in on Shay.

Home Alone

Shay

“Are sure you don’t want to go with us, Shay?” Rachel asks for the third time, tapping her foot against the floor.  “It’ll be fun.”

I can tell she is on the verge of begging, so I need to nip this in the bud right now.  Slowly shaking my head, I pull a tub of butter and a package of chocolate chips from the fridge.  “Nope, I just want to relax today.  I spend enough time at the mall as it is.”

“Oh, come on.  You can never have enough of the mall.” She sticks out her bottom lip, showing me her favorite facial expression. 

After months of living with her and Nina, I’ve learned to ignore Rachel’s pouty face.  It’s not easy, but it’s something I have to do.  If not, I would have a sixteen year old girl running roughshod over me.  I adore her, but she can be a bit over the top at times.  It’s part of her charm.

“Sorry, hun.  I’m going to make some chocolate chip cookies and chill out in front of the TV.”

“You just want to watch Supernatural and slobber over Jensen Ackles,” She says with a laugh.

I shrug, smiling at her.  “What can I say; he’s slobber-worthy.”

A few months ago, I never would have had such a carefree discussion.  Every word I spoke before had been carefully chosen.  Even my conversations with our housekeeper were strictly monitored.  With every action, every move, and every mannerism, I had to replicate Gwendolyn to a tee.  It was draining; absolutely and completely exhausting.

It has taken me a while, but I’m slowly getting my sense of self back. Being part of a family again, even if they aren’t mine, has helped me heal.  Rachel’s so full of energy and always has a smile on her face.  Her exuberance for life is rubbing off on me.  Nina’s affectionate nature is also helping.  She allows me to be myself, without pushing.  The two combined are helping me become the carefree person I once was.  I’m not quite there, but I’m a whole lot closer than I was.

“Leave her alone,
hija
, she doesn’t want to go.” Nina calls from the other room, bringing me back to the conversation. 

“But,
Mamá
.” Rachel moans out, as her mother walks into the room.

As she walks into the kitchen, she lays a loving hand on her daughter’s shoulder.  “No, Shay never gets any time alone.  Let her have the day to herself.”

Rachel nods, but doesn’t lose her pout.  “Fine, but it’s your loss.”

With that, she moves forward and kisses my cheek, before grabbing the keys and heading to the front door.  “I’m driving,
Mamá
.”

Nina giggles, sounding twenty years younger.  “Go on and get the car started; I’ll be out in a minute.”

After the door slams shut, she walks over to me and places her hands on my cheeks.  “Are you going to be okay here alone all day?”

I smile at the concern in her voice, wanting to ease the worry she is feeling.   About a month ago, I finally broke down and told her the truth,—the entire truth with all the gory details.  She knows more about my past than any other person in this world. Since then, she has treated me with kid gloves, always waiting for me to break.  At first, I felt like a burden to her, but after a while of watching her with family and friends, I came to realize it’s just Nina’s nature to be protective. 

Even the bikers, the ones she said that used to loathe her because of the color of her skin, stop by to see her on a regular basis.  They’re always around for cook-outs, morning coffee, or just a quick chat. What they actually come for is Nina’s charm.  Everyone wants to be on the receiving end of her smile.  I guess even badasses need to be coddled from time to time.