Beautiful Innocence (5 page)

There is only so long two pair of shorts; four tops and a handful of panties can last from cleaning them in a sink with hand soap. And wearing the same bra for over two straight weeks, since I forgot to grab more when I ran, hasn’t escaped my attention. Quickly, I glance down and peer at my feet. Ugh! I need a new pair of shoes, too. Flip-flops are fine for the beach, but they are not made for standing all night and slapping beers on tables. I need new shoes. Just another expense to add to the long list of crap I need.

“Ava? They’re ready to seat us.” Sam holds out his hand for me to take, so I do, but if I’m being honest I don’t feel anything. Zilch! No sparks, no electricity coursing through me at the mere touch of his skin. Although, granted, I have no experience in the love department physically or emotionally, but I have years of practice watching how it’s supposed to be from various television programs. When I was forced to stay indoors there wasn’t much else to do. Television and books became my escape when I needed one. And they always talked about fireworks and heartbeats and uncontrollable urges. Why do I not have one of those right now? Maybe they all lied, or maybe I just wanted to experience something real, something amazing for once in my life.

Sam seems sweet and safe, almost what a real brother would feel like, but I need and want to make friends with him, so I keep my mouth shut and let him think what he wants for now. I have a decision to make, and it’s important to choose the right guy. “I asked for a table out on the deck since you didn’t bring a sweater. It can get cold inside with the air running.”

His fingers weave through mine and tighten. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

As soon as we sit a plump lady comes over to our table, looking like she’s had the worst day of her life. “You two want anything to drink?” She taps her pen rapidly on her order book. Sam and I share a quick glance and both stifle a laugh at her abruptness. “I’ll have a beer. Whatever you have on tap is fine,” he addresses her and then turns to me. “Ava?”

“Oh, I, umm,” I stumble. “I’ll just have what he’s having.” I barely look up, nervous.

I can feel her beady eyes staring straight at me, so I glance up slightly. “Can I see some I.D.?”

Shoot! I pretend to rifle through my handbag for several minutes, painfully aware they’re both waiting on me. I shrug. “I must’ve forgot it.”

She shoots me a glare, still tapping on her pen. “Un-huh, sure you did.”

“I’ll just have a coke.”

Sam narrows his eyes and tilts his head from side to side and I can tell he’s wondering the same thing as the waitress. “How old are you?”

“Twenty-one,” I answer too quickly. “I just forgot my wallet.” I add, hoping he’ll believe me.

He lets it slide and I exhale, scooting back into my chair, waiting on the food to occupy my mouth so I don’t say anything stupid or foolish to get me busted so soon.

I keep the conversation on him, which he seems fine talking about and it’s fun to get to know somebody new. He majored in Business and went to University of South Carolina and graduated last year. He loves working at the bar, but knows he needs to shit or get off the pot soon. His words not mine.

“How’s the tilapia?” he asks when I’ve finish most of my meal. It’s a little dry, but I don’t dare tell him that.

“It’s delicious. Thanks again for taking me out.”

He places his fork down and folds his hands on the table. “Good. I was thinking after this we could go for a drink, but I guess that’s out. We can take a drive, walk on the beach or we could just head back to my place. My folks are gone for the weekend.”

“You still live at home?”

His sweet little smile turns sour. “Yeah, I just got back from school last summer, so I haven’t saved enough yet to get a place of my own.”

“That’s cool. But I thought you said we might catch a movie.” His eyes drop to my mouth and I know he can see me chewing the corner of my bottom lip as I think about his offer. It’s a nervous habit that I try desperately to stop, but I never seem to be able to. But I’m starting to think his eyes and mind are finding it more appealing than silly. “Sam, can I be honest with you?”

He leans back in the chair and nods.

“I really like you.”

That gets a megawatt smile. “I really like you too, Ava.”

I cringe. “As a friend,” I mumble.

His sweet brown eyes close briefly. “A friend?”

I scoot forward and lean into the table so only he can hear. “I just have so much going on right now with moving here. I don’t think the two of us would work right now.”

He throws his napkin onto the table and fixes a hard glare on me. And I can easily sense he’s not happy where I’m taking this, but I do really like him.

“But maybe someday,” I’m quick to add on.

He hasn’t moved or said anything for a full minute, but he does cross his arms. “What’s so important in your life right now keeping you from saying yes?” His eyes narrow and a little crease pops up on his forehead as he waits for my answer.

I glance down to my lap, but peek up slightly to see him. “I can’t explain right now.”

He shrugs and chuckles gruffly a few times. “Why not?”

“Please, Sam. I need a friend right now really bad, and I thought maybe coming out would help me, but I’m sorry if you got the wrong impression, and more so if I led you on.” Okay, so apparently I am making my decision. It can’t be Sam. He’s been my only friend and I refuse to hurt or take advantage of him.

He sighs and leans forward in his chair, not once taking his eyes off me. “Ava, I have no problem being your friend, but why are you so desperate for one?”

I reach across the table and turn my hand over and keep it there watching him as he just stares down at it. Finally he relents and wraps his fingers in mine and squeezes. “I promise to tell you what I can, but right now I can’t. But, Sam, I need someone to keep an eye out for me.”

He drops my hand and eyes me suspiciously. “For what? Are you in trouble?”

I pull back and take a sip of soda, debating how much I should say. “I don’t think so, but I can’t say for sure.”

“And you’re trusting me to be the one to keep you safe. Why?”

“I have to trust someone.”

He downs his beer in a rather large gulp before dropping his gaze back on me. “Does Angie know about all this?”

I run my hand through my hair and then reach out for him again, needing the warmth of him to keep me talking. He grabs hold without thinking this time. “Sam.” I gently squeeze and shut my eyes for a second. “I can’t involve her. She’s been amazing to me. I can’t let anything happen to her. I would never forgive myself.”

His other hand wraps around mine, he holds it tightly, but he’s shaking his head. “She needs to know.”

“She knows enough. Please, Sam?” I can hear my own self-pity come through as I plead.

“Fuck! Fine. Let me pay the bill and I’ll take you home.” He pulls his wallet out and then flicks his attention back to me. “Are you even sure you’re a hundred percent safe there? Why not live with Angie?”

“I told you already.”

“I’d give you a place to stay, but my folks and all.”

I pat his hand. “I’m fine where I am, Sam, but thank you.”

It’s a quiet ride back to the bar because I’m positive he’s thinking heavily about the little information I dumped on him at dinner unexpectedly. I am one hundred percent positive that not one of those three idiots knows where I am, but there is that small, teeny part of my brain that screams trust your instincts, Ava, and trust Sam because if I learned anything it’s that my life has never been easy.

When we reach the parking lot, he throws his car into park and drops his head onto the steering wheel, but turns slowly to look at me and I can see the desire he has for me in his eyes. “Let me walk you in.”

“You don’t have to.”

He sighs heavily as he hops out. “Yeah, I do. Let’s go.”

As I come around to the front of his car he grabs my hand, halting me. “Ava, I think we could make this work if you could just try a little, but I’m not gonna push you. But, I promise to keep my eye on you when I can. Just promise me that you’ll come to me if you need anything at all. Okay?”

I close my eyes as he pulls me softly to him and nod into his chest at his sweet words. If only? “Deal,” I assure him.

Sundays are extremely slow so I’ve been granted the day off to go shopping. Aunt Angie even lent me her truck without asking me about a license. I don’t have one, but she doesn’t need to know that. My ride is probably older than I am, but at least it gets me here. She wanted to take me to the mall, but I flat out refused. Even with her being as sweet as she has, I’m too ashamed to have her come with me. She’s giving me so much already that I don’t want to take her charity, too. And quite frankly, rummaging through sales rack after sales rack isn’t much fun when you have no money to spend.

There are only two stores that I can afford in the mall on my measly budget, and sadly I wouldn’t be caught dead in what they have to offer. So I hop back into her truck an hour later and cross over to a strip mall with discount stores.

I’m on my knees skimming through the lowest rack of panties when I get a whiff of men’s cologne and the sharp intake of his breath. I freeze, knowing someone is behind me and consider climbing inside the rack to hide.

“I like the pink ones.” A very rough, sensual voice whispers in my ear. I’m afraid to turn, but that smooth tone rings a bell, so I make the move and look over my shoulder. And looming over me is my sexy as hell temptation, otherwise known as Joshua Woods, and he’s breathing his warm breath down my neck, making my thighs ache. Which is a new feeling for me since no one has ever made my thighs ache before. I wasn’t even aware that they could. Startled by this new feeling, I go to get up, but his strong hands come down and push on my shoulders, keeping me in place. “Don’t stand. I like you on your knees.”

I gasp at his audacity, dropping my mouth open immediately at his vulgarity. Never has anyone ever spoken to me like that before, well, that’s not true, but no one that I like hearing it from. I swallow hard. “Excuse me?”

He bends over completely and my breathing is starting to become erratic at his closeness. He reaches down and grabs the pink pair from the rack. “I’ll buy these for you if you forgive my mouth. It has a mind of it’s own.”

I pluck them out of his grip. “I can get my own panties, Joshua.”

He grumbles, standing up immediately.

I want him to come back down once he stands. His eyes flick over to my cart. “Is that all you’re buying?”

I look nervously from him to the cart and back to him, unsure of why he’s asking. “Yeah, why?”

He shakes his head slightly. “There’s a plastic chair up front that has my name on it. Go pick at least a weeks worth of outfits and then come find me so I can pay.”

“What?” I almost shout. I’m stumped at his offer, but it’s sweet nonetheless. Or maybe I should be insulted. What does he really want?

When he leans in the hair on his chin grazes my cheek. His mouth settles next to my ear. I can hear my own heartbeat thumping away so clearly that he must know what he’s doing to me. “You’ve been wearing the same clothes for two weeks. I want to do this for you.”

I swing around so swiftly I land right into his hard chest. I want to stay there forever when his arms come around and he grabs my hips. His fingers dig in forcefully like he’s trying to restrain himself, making me feel lost and woozy at his touch. I gaze up and I know I’m probably all starry-eyed as I look at his beautiful face, but I don’t care. “Are you following me?”

“No,” he whispers like he’s struggling for air as his fingers dig in deeper. He blinks several times, shaking his head. “I saw you pulling in the same time I did. I need a belt.” When he pulls away abruptly I want his hands back on me, but can’t find the words.

Once the daze passes I can breathe again. “Oh.” I smile confidently. “I can help with that. What’s it for?”

His eyes rake over my entire body and I swear it’s the sexiest, most intense thing that’s ever happened to me and he hasn’t even done anything yet. Which makes my mind wonder a heartbeat about what he could do to me if he was touching me.

“An important date I got coming up soon, angel.”

I literally feel the color drain from my face at the mention of another girl, which shouldn’t surprise me. “I can still help.”

We both stand there in a stare-down, searching one another’s eyes until finally his hand grabs my shoulder and he turns me toward the men’s section. “Lead the way.”

I toss the pink panties into my cart and push it as he follows. I can hear him snickering behind me. I can only imagine what he’s thinking.

JOSH

I have no idea why I’m standing in a discount store looking at belts, but here I am. Actually, I do. I saw Angie’s truck pull in. All that blonde hair flying out the window drew me like a magnet, so I mindlessly pulled in behind her. As I check her cute little figure out often, it hasn’t escaped my notice that she wears the same damn shorts almost every day and it has dawned on me that she has nothing. When my memory itched back to digging through her backpack, I realized she really doesn’t have much to her name. And for reasons unknown, I start to play a role that I’m not used to.

I had zero intentions of making my presence known, but it got to the point it was painful watching her look at every fucking price tag and sigh before placing every item back on the rack. I’m about ready to buy the whole lady’s section, if need be, to erase that frown from her beautiful face. When she smiles, the most gut-wrenching feeling eats away at me like I can see straight through her skin, deep into her soul. I want to see her smile more.

“What about this one? It’s kind of nice.” She holds up a black leather belt, but I shake it off. It’s not one I’d wear unless I was going to a funeral.

Her fingers glide over it a few more times and my brain starts wishing her fingers would glide over something else. “You know what? Just pick one. I don’t care. Just get a medium.” I begin to turn away, but she pulls out one that’s perfect for me, one I would choose myself. It’s brown and beat up, rugged, like me. She tosses it into the cart without asking this time, but I see the knowing grin register on her face as she turns.