Beautiful Disaster (24 page)

“Shut up, Travis. Just shut up,” I said, staring at the back of Shepley's head.

“Pidge … ,” Travis began.

Shepley hit his steering wheel with the heel of his hand. “Shut up, Travis! You said you're sorry, now shut the fuck up!”

The trip home was made in complete silence. Shepley pulled his seat forward to let me out of the car, and I looked to America, who nodded with understanding.

She kissed her boyfriend good night. “I'll see you tomorrow, baby.”

Shep nodded in resignation and kissed her. “Love you.”

I walked past Travis to America's Honda, and he jogged to my side. “C'mon. Don't leave mad.”

“Oh, I'm not leaving mad. I'm furious.”

“She needs some time to cool off, Travis,” America warned, unlocking her door.

When the passenger side lock popped, Travis held his hand against the door. “Don't leave, Pigeon. I was out of line. I'm sorry.”

I held up my hand, showing him the remnants of dried blood on my palm. “Call me when you grow up.”

He leaned against the door with his hip. “You can't leave.”

I raised an eyebrow, and Shepley jogged around the car beside us. “Travis, you're drunk. You're about to make a huge mistake. Just let her go home, cool off … you can both talk tomorrow when you're sober.”

Travis's expression turned desperate. “She can't leave,” he said, staring into my eyes.

“It's not going to work, Travis,” I said, tugging on the door. “Move!”

“What do you mean it's not gonna work?” Travis asked, grabbing my arm.

“I mean the sad face. I'm not falling for it,” I said, pulling away.

Shepley watched Travis for a moment, and then turned to me. “Abby … this is the moment I was talking about. Maybe you should … ,”

“Stay out of it, Shep,” America snapped, starting the car.

“I'm gonna fuck up. I'm gonna fuck up a lot, Pidge, but you have to forgive me.”

“I'm going to have a huge bruise on my ass in the morning! You hit that guy because you were pissed at me! What should that tell me? Because red flags are going up all over the place right now!”

“I've never hit a girl in my life,” he said, surprised at my words.

“And I'm not about to be the first one!” I said, tugging on the door. “Move, damn it!”

Travis nodded, and then took a step back. I sat beside America, slamming the door. She put the car in reverse, and Travis leaned down to look at me through the window.

“You're going to call me tomorrow, right?” he said, touching the windshield.

“Just go, Mare,” I said, refusing to meet his eyes.

The night was long. I kept looking at the clock and cringed when I saw that another hour had passed. I couldn't stop thinking about Travis and whether or not I would call him, wondering if he was awake as well. I finally resorted to sticking the earbuds of my iPod in my ear and listening to every loud, obnoxious song on my playlist.

The last time I looked at the clock, it was after four. The birds were already chirping outside my window, and I smiled when my eyes began to feel heavy. It seemed like just a few moments later when I heard a knock at the door, and America burst through it. She pulled the earbuds from my ears and then fell into my desk chair.

“Mornin', sunshine. You look like hell,” she said, blowing a pink bubble from her mouth and then letting it smack loudly as it popped.

“Shut UP, America!” Kara said from under her covers.

“You realize people like you and Trav are going to fight, right?” America said, filing her nails as she chewed the huge wad of gum in her mouth.

I turned over on the bed. “You are officially fired. You are a terrible conscience.”

She laughed. “I just know you. If I handed you my keys right now, you'd drive straight over there.”

“I would not!”

“Whatever,” she lilted.

“It's eight o'clock in the morning, Mare. They're probably still passed out cold.”

Just then, I heard a faint knock on the door. Kara's arm shot out from under her comforter and turned the knob. The door slowly opened, revealing Travis in the doorway.

“Can I come in?” he asked in a low, raspy voice. The purple circles under his eyes announced his lack of sleep, if he'd had any at all.

I sat up in bed, startled by his exhausted appearance. “Are you okay?”

He walked in and fell to his knees in front of me. “I'm so sorry, Abby. I'm sorry,” he said, wrapping his arms around my waist and burying his head in my lap.

I cradled his head in my arms and peered up at America.

“I'm uh … I'm gonna go,” she said, awkwardly fumbling for the door handle.

Kara rubbed her eyes and sighed and then grabbed her shower bag. “I'm always very clean when
you're around, Abby,” she grumbled, slamming the door behind her.

Travis looked up at me. “I know I get crazy when it comes to you, but God knows I'm tryin', Pidge. I don't wanna screw this up.”

“Then don't.”

“This is hard for me, ya know. I feel like any second you're going to figure out what a piece of shit I am and leave me. When you were dancing last night, I saw a dozen different guys watching you. You go to the bar, and I see you thank that guy for your drink. Then that douchebag on the dance floor grabs you.”

“You don't see me throwing punches every time a girl talks to you. I can't stay locked up in the apartment all the time. You're going to have to get a handle on your temper.”

“I will. I've never wanted a girlfriend before, Pigeon. I'm not used to feeling this way about someone … about anyone. If you'll be patient with me, I swear I'll get it figured out.”

“Let's get something straight; you're not a piece of shit, you're amazing. It doesn't matter who buys me drinks or who asks me to dance or who flirts with me. I'm going home with you. You've asked me to trust you, and you don't seem to trust me.”

He frowned. “That's not true.”

“If you think I'm going to leave you for the next guy that comes along, then you don't have much faith in me.”

He tightened his grip. “I'm not good enough for you, Pidge. That doesn't mean I don't trust you, I'm just bracing for the inevitable.”

“Don't say that. When we're alone, you're perfect. We're perfect. But then you let everyone else ruin it. I don't expect a 180, but you have to pick your battles. You can't come out swinging every time someone looks at me.”

He nodded. “I'll do anything you want. Just … tell me you love me.”

“You know I do.”

“I need to hear you say it,” he said, his brows pulling together.

“I love you,” I said, touching my lips to his. “Now quit being such a baby.”

He laughed, crawling into the bed with me. We spent the next hour in the same spot under the covers, giggling and kissing, barely noticing when Kara returned from the shower.

“Could you get out? I have to get dressed,” Kara said to Travis, tightening her robe.

Travis kissed my cheek, and then stepped into the hall. “See ya in a sec.”

I fell against my pillow as Kara rummaged through her closet. “What are you so happy about?” she grumbled.

“Nothing,” I sighed.

“Do you know what codependency is, Abby? Your boyfriend is a prime example, which is creepy considering he went from having no respect for women at all to thinking he needs you to breathe.”

“Maybe he does,” I said, refusing to let her spoil my mood.

“Don't you wonder why that is? I mean … he's been through half the girls at this school. Why you?”

“He says I'm different.”

“Sure he does. But why?”

“Why do you care?” I snapped.

“It's dangerous to need someone that much. You're trying to save him, and he's hoping you can. You two are a disaster.”

I smiled at the ceiling. “It doesn't matter what or why it is. When it's good, Kara … it's beautiful.”

She rolled her eyes. “You're hopeless.”

Travis knocked on the door, and Kara let him in.

“I'm going to the commons to study. Good luck,” she said in the most insincere voice she could muster.

“What was that about?” Travis asked.

“She said we're a disaster.”

“Tell me something I don't know,” he smiled. His eyes were suddenly focused, and he kissed the tender skin behind my ear. “Why don't you come home with me?”

I rested my hand on the back of his neck and sighed at the feeling of his soft lips against my skin. “I think I'm going to stay here. I'm constantly at your apartment.”

His head popped up. “So? You don't like it there?”

I touched his cheek and sighed. He was so quick to worry. “Of course I do, but I don't live there.”

He ran the tip of his nose up my neck. “I want you there. I want you there every night.”

“I'm not moving in with you,” I said, shaking my head.

“I didn't ask you to move in with me. I said I want you there.”

“Same thing!” I laughed.

Travis frowned. “You're really not staying with me tonight?”

I shook my head, and his eyes traveled up my wall to the ceiling. I could almost see the wheels spinning inside his head. “What are you up to?” I asked, narrowing my eyes.

“I'm trying to think of another bet.”

I flipped a tiny white pill in my mouth and swallowed, chasing it with a large glass of water. I was standing in the middle of Travis's bedroom in a bra and panties, getting ready to slip into my pajamas.

“What's that?” Travis asked from the bed.

“Uh … my pill?”

He frowned. “What pill?”

“The pill, Travis. You have yet to replenish your top drawer and the last thing I need is to worry about whether or not I'm going to get my period.”

“Oh.”

“One of us has to be responsible,” I said, raising an eyebrow.

“My God you're sexy,” Travis said, propping his head up with his hand. “The most beautiful woman at Eastern is my girlfriend. That's insanity.”

I rolled my eyes and slipped the purple silk over my head, crawling in bed beside him. I straddled his lap and kissed his neck, giggling when he let his head fall against the headboard. “Again? You're gonna kill me, Pidge.”

“You can't die,” I said, covering his face with kisses. “You're too damn mean.”

“No, I can't die because there are too many jackasses falling over themselves to take my place! I may live forever just to spite them!”

I giggled against his mouth and he flipped me onto my back. His finger slid under the delicate
purple ribbon tied at the crest of my shoulder and slid it down my arm, kissing the skin it left behind.

“Why me, Trav?”

He leaned back, searching my eyes. “What do you mean?”

“You've been with all these women, refused to settle down, refuse to even take a phone number … so why me?”

“Where is this coming from?” he said, his thumb caressing my cheek.

I shrugged. “I'm just curious.”

“Why me? You have half the men at Eastern just waiting for me to screw up.”

I wrinkled my nose. “That's not true. Don't change the subject.”

“It is true. If I hadn't been chasing you from the beginning of school, you'd have more than Parker Hayes following you around. He's just too self-absorbed to be scared of me.”

“You're avoiding my question! And poorly, I might add.”

“Okay! Why you?” A smile spread across his face and he leaned down to touch his lips to mine. “I had a thing for you since the night of that first fight.”

“What?” I said with a dubious expression.

“It's true. You in that cardigan with blood all over you? You looked absolutely ridiculous,” he chuckled.

“Thanks.”

His smiled faded. “It was when you looked up at me. That was the moment. You had this wide-eyed, innocent look … no pretenses. You didn't look at me like I was Travis Maddox,” he said, rolling his eyes at
his own words, “you looked at me like I was … I don't know, a person, I guess.”

“News flash, Trav. You are a person.”

He brushed my bangs from my face. “No, before you came, Shepley was the only one that treated me like anyone else. You didn't get all awkward or flirt or run your fingers through your hair. You saw me.”

“I was a complete bitch to you.”

He kissed my neck. “That's what sealed the deal.”

I slipped my hands down his back and into his boxers. “I hope this gets old soon. I don't see myself ever getting tired of you.”

“Promise?” he asked, smiling.

His phone buzzed on the night table and he smiled, holding it to his ear. “Yeah? … Oh, hell no, I got Pidge here with me. We're just getting' ready to go to bed … Shut the fuck up, Trent, that's not funny … Seriously? What's he doin' in town?” He looked at me and sighed. “All right. We'll be there in half an hour. … You heard me, douchebag. Because I don't go anywhere without her, that's why. Do you want me to pound your face when I get there?” Travis hung up and shook his head.

I raised an eyebrow. “That is the weirdest conversation I've ever heard.”

“That was Trent. Thomas is in town and it's poker night at my dad's.”

“Poker night?” I swallowed.

“Yeah, they usually take all of my money. Cheatin' bastards.”

“I'm going to meet your family in thirty minutes?”

He looked at his watch. “Twenty-seven minutes to be exact.”

“Oh my God, Travis!” I wailed, jumping out of bed.

“What are you doing?” he sighed.

I rummaged through the closet and yanked on a pair of jeans, hopping up and down to pull them up, and then pulled the nightgown over my head, throwing it into Travis's face. “I can't believe you gave me twenty minutes' notice to meet your family! I could kill you right now!”