Bangkok Hard Time (18 page)

Epilogue

At the time of the publication of this disclosure it has been just over two decades since His Majesty The King of Thailand used his constitutional Royal Prerogative in response to my petition for pardon. He spoke the words that opened the “mouth of the crocodile” thus commanding it to disgorge me and I walked out free and forgiven.

My high school English teacher at International School Bangkok was fond of quotations and one of her favorites in particular had always perplexed me. Quoting Socrates, she said “The unexamined life is not worth living”.

The search for its meaning always brought more questions than answers. Ultimately, the forced Thai style acceptance of the consequences of my own karma lent an insight.

Thus my humble understanding of that Socratic saying is; As a self-examination, the value or worthiness of your life is not dependent on the opinions or judgments of others, even though the desire to please others is often admirable. It seems that it is your own life and so it is up to you to question your own true nature, motivations, thoughts and behavior, etc. Then, set and live by your own rules that you judge worthy. Anything less is probably a waste of the entire life experience.

Upon returning to Arkansas, I searched for and found Deb. For the first time I met my handsome four-year-old son, Caleb, who had been born shortly after my incarceration. Two years later Deb and I were married and she also bore me a beautiful daughter whom we named Ianna.

I returned to the jewelry trade as a goldsmith since it was the only legal skill that I possessed. I had always been an honest businessman even when the business I was involved in was illegal and so it was difficult for me to lie on applications for employment when asked if I had ever been convicted of a felony.

I did lie about my past, because I had a family to support. No jewelry store owner would have ever hired an ex-inmate, ex-junkie and convicted international heroin smuggler. If you can accept and understand this pathetic conundrum then I congratulate you.

Since my release I have not used heroin or been involved with heroin trafficking. Drug addiction, alcoholism, etc. are not diseases. They are simply character flaws and something that can be changed. This perhaps is debatable.

In conclusion I hold one truth that I refuse to debate because I learned it the hard way. The poppy is nature’s most miraculous flower. Its opiate derivatives can provide the most blessed relief from any pain. It is a beautiful servant in that regard but if a flaw of personal character allows … it then becomes a cruel taskmaster and a hard rain will surely fall.

Photos

The author (wearing glasses) sitting outside the compound of the family house in Bangkok with his sister Carol and brothers David (left) and Stephen (right) waiting for the bus to take them to their first day of school at International School Bangkok, 1967.

The author (right) and his brother Stephen, RIP, photographed in a small village in southern Thailand pretending to be GIs, 1967.

The author with Bobbie on prom night at International School Bangkok, 1968.

The author’s friend Mike speaking his mind on stage at the American Teen Club, Bangkok, 1968.

Mike on active duty in the Vietnam War, 1970. RIP.

Carolyn Saluga, the author’s English teacher, in the ISB yearbook. RIP.

The author as a quasi hippie and the first person convicted in Arkansas for selling LSD, 1970.

Dennis (left) and the author standing outside the departure lounge at Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport on their last smuggling run to Bangkok in the early 1980s.

The author standing outside Bahn Pee Lek in the early 1980s.

“The American Hut in Lard Yao” (above) and “A Lard Yao Cell” (facing page) by inmate Sydney Clarke. Briton Sydney Clarke was previously incarcerated in Iran for heroin trafficking and was freed during the 1979 Iranian Revolution when all the prisons were opened and the prisoners released. Two years later Clarke was caught in Bangkok for smuggling heroin from Thailand and had already been in prison for a few years when the author met him. Clarke was among those HIV-positive farang prisoners who were eventually segregated to the AIDS prison yard. Clarke and one other British HIV-infected prisoner were released by The King in early 1988 in honor of the visit to Thailand by TRH The Prince and The Princess of Wales, Charles and Diana.

Back row from left: the author, the author’s French cellmates Didier and Jean Yves, Algerian boy Murat. Front row: Spaniard Mariano, Frenchman Pierro, Nigerian Yusef, RIP.