Back to December (Ward Sisters Book 1) (41 page)

“Who, Em? Who did you see?”

“Liam,” she whispered.

“Liam who?”

The tears came now. A floodgate of emotions she thought she'd finally tamped down had breached her carefully built wall of denial – therapy had only done so much to curb Old Emily's tendency to bury her pain. Her voice broke as she said, “My bodyguard.”

“You're not making sense. Let's go sit outside the coffee shop. I'll get us some coffee and then you can tell me what's wrong, okay?” Emily nodded and let her sister lead her to the wrought iron tables outside the shop window.

A few minutes later, as the tears rolled down Em's cheeks, Charlie sat next to her, two coffee cups in her hands.

“Em, what's going on?” She passed Emily her coffee.

“I swear, I saw Liam. He...he was my bodyguard. You know, while I was with Rob.”

“Why would he be here? He's not your bodyguard anymore, is he?”

She sniffed. “No. He's not. I left him behind in L.A. when I came home for my trip to New York. He wanted to follow me, to make sure I was okay, but I refused.”

“He lives in Minneapolis, doesn't he?

“Yeah, but he's from Boston. I mean, he could be here, right?”

“Not likely, hon. Are you sure it was him?”

“No. But the truth is, Charlie, that even if it wasn't him, I wanted it to be.”

“Why Em?”

She put her head in her hands. “I'm an idiot, Charlie! What did I do?”

“Sweetie, you have to help me out, here.” Charlie pulled Emily's hands from her face.

“I screwed up. I shouldn't have run away, Charlie. I loved him. I still love him. I let my own fears, my own insecurities, all those years of Mom telling me that epic, romantic love was a myth, I let that cloud my judgment. I was wrong. I knew I was wrong as soon as I left him. Whether or not that was Liam, this is proof.”

“Wrong about what, Em? I'm still confused.”

“I told you what Rachel said.” Charlie nodded. “I never told you what really happened. That I caught Rob kissing Rachel. He doesn't know that. I don't even know if
she
knew I saw them. But she told me that he was just waiting for her to come back to him. That he had been waiting all that time for her to get her act together. And that he had told her that night it was time.”

“Oh, Em. I'm so sorry.”

“No! I mean, it was a lie! Do you remember when you sent me that link about the publicity scandal?”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

Emily explained what she had told Meg about Barry and Rachel. “Rachel knew, Charlie. She was in on it, somehow. Which means she was trying to sabotage me and Rob.”

“Why would she do that?”

“Jealousy. Liam tried to tell me she was a liar. That she lied to me to make me mistrust Rob.”

“How is that proof, Em?”

“If he was just using me, Charl, why would he send Liam to watch me?”

“Are you sure Rob sent him?”

“No.”

“Then how can you be sure you're right about all of it?”

“It doesn't matter if that was Liam or if Rob sent him. The fact is, that I wanted to see Liam because I know I was wrong before. He didn't use me or make a fool of me. Rachel did.

“What are you going to do?”

“There's nothing I
can
do.”

“Do you still have his number?”

“Yes. I couldn't bear to delete it, even right afterward.”

“Then call him.”

“I can't! Do you know what I did to him? I didn't just break up with him, Charlie. I was cruel. I used all his insecurities against him. I hurt him on purpose. I can't imagine why he'd want to ever speak to me again. But if he does, he has to be the one to come to me. I wish he would. I wish he'd just show up out of nowhere. Maybe crash into me again like he did that first time. I've wanted that every day since I concluded I was wrong. I miss him. I miss him so much.” She began to cry again, in earnest.

Charlie rubbed her back. “It'll be okay, Em. Do you remember what I told you before? If it's meant to be, it will. Don't give up yet. Is this why you've been so sullen the last two months?” Emily nodded. “Mom thought it was because you felt like a fool.”

“At first I did, too, then I realized that I was still in love with him. Reading about Barry reinforced that I'd made a mistake.”

“Why didn't you say anything to me before?”

“Because it didn't matter. Unless and until Rob shows me he wants me back, it's a moot point. I only told you today because I thought I saw Liam. I've been trying to get over it. Meggie's been making me go to therapy.”

“Good. You need it. Meantime, let's go get something chocolate and decadent. It will help for a little bit, at least. And then we're going back to your apartment to change and you're running with me in the Back Bay.”

Em groaned. “You're making me run off my chocolate?”

“No, I'm making you run because it's a good way to clear your head and boost your mood without drugs. I'm sure your therapist would agree. Tonight, we'll call Meggie and have girls night. I need to get drunk at least one more time before I'm married. This is a good excuse.”

Emily laughed. “Okay. You win. Chocolate, running, booze. Therapy next week.” They both stood and linked arms. “Thanks, Charlie Brown.”

“Anytime, Emma Bean. Anytime.”

Bar Harbor, Maine, eight months after New Year's...

Four days before Charlie's August wedding, Emily followed her mother around doing errands and when she got back to her parents' house, her iPhone was gone. Emily suspected that she had left it on top of the car when they stopped for an ice cream at Dairy Queen. It was probably smashed to bits on the road somewhere.

The phone was her work lifeline and Emily hated being without it, so she called for a replacement phone – she was due for one, fortunately – and it had finally arrived via UPS on Friday. Em's parents transported Charlie's dress from their house on the day of the wedding and brought the phone in the morning. Emily kissed and hugged her mother in thanks. Gail was flabbergasted by the unusual display of joy for an electronic device.

Emily paid extra for them to set it up so she could just turn the phone on and use it. She was pleased to see they had done that and immediately checked her messages. Nothing crucial for work, just reminders from Marcus and a call about an interview in a few weeks.

Then there was the call she didn't expect in a million years.

Hi, Em. It's Rob. I know you probably don't want to talk to me, but can you please call me? It's important.
Pause.
Please call me back as soon as you get this. Bye.

She saw in the call count that he'd tried again several times, though that had been the only message. He'd called yesterday. Emily's heart raced. This was what she'd been waiting for, right? For him to make the first move? A sign? A reason to talk to him again?

She dialed his number – she knew it by heart because she'd stared at it daily between when she thought she saw Liam in Portland and when she'd lost her phone. It went straight to voicemail.
This is Rob. You know what to do.

“Rob, it's Emily. I got your call. I lost my phone but I have a new one now. Call me when you get this.” She paused for a moment, unsure if she should say it. “I'm really glad you called. I'll talk to you soon. Bye.”

Em stared at her phone for a few minutes. She debated if she should call Amy or maybe Jenna, possibly Rick or even Liam. They might know where he was. Just as she decided to call Liam, whose number she knew best, her mother sighed heavily behind her.

“Emily, it's your sister's wedding day. You aren't working today. Put that thing away. In fact, shut it off. You can deal with work tomorrow. If there is a real emergency, they know you're at the hotel. Though I can't imagine what kind of
writing
emergency would be important enough to disturb your sister's wedding.”

Not inclined to divulge what she had really been doing, Em sighed and did as she was told. Rob would just have to wait until after the wedding.

Thankfully, the early August heat and humidity that had plagued them for the past week had finally broken with a rainstorm yesterday. It was still hot and sunny but no longer oppressively humid. Fortunately, Charlie and Dan were getting married late in the day so that the reception could happen mostly in the cooler evening hours.

Charlie didn't want to choose between her two sisters, so she declined having an official Maid of Honor. Because she was the oldest, Emily was set to walk in last and was officially signing the marriage license as a witness, but her title was still just Bridesmaid. It was her job to make sure Charlie's train was fluffed, so she spread out the embroidered organza of the
Sabrina-
inspired dress one last time before she kissed her father's cheek, hugged Charlie, and took her position at the door of the chapel.

As the string quartet at the front of the chapel played
Pachabel's Canon in D Minor
, Emily began her slow walk down the aisle. Out of the corner of her eye, she thought she saw a familiar face near the back, but she didn't want to turn and look, so she just walked. She took her place when she reached the front and before she could look to where she thought she had seen him, the wedding march started and the guests stood.

It didn't matter, he was head and shoulders above so many people in stature, Emily could see Rob's face at the back of the crowd.

It couldn't be him, could it? He wasn't invited, was explicitly forbidden to come by her mother when he was still her boyfriend. Surely he wouldn't have crashed her sister's wedding when he knew his presence would cause a commotion? What possible reason would Rob have to travel all the way to Downeast Maine when he wasn't wanted by anyone but Emily?

Surely it was wishful thinking, from all those months she'd wanted him to magically appear or crash into her like he did that day in Minnesota. Probably a result of the phone call or when she donned the diamond earrings. The Tiffany box had reminded her of that perfect Christmas when he gave them to her. She fiddled with the earring in her right ear, smiled to herself, and then returned her attention to her beautiful little sister, who made her way down the aisle on their father's arm.

Dan looked like the happiest man alive. Tears filled his eyes as he looked at his bride, who had taken her place by his side. Emily fixed Charlie's train again and her sister handed her the bridal bouquet, heavy with cream-colored English roses and hydrangea.

As she stepped back into her position, Emily's eyes darted back to where she thought she had seen Rob. When he wasn't there, she took a breath to steady the tears that sprang instantly at the memory of a love as overwhelming as what she saw between Charlie and Dan. At least everyone would think her emotional display was about the bride and groom. She tried to smile, but it was a struggle. Em was genuinely happy for her sister, but it was painful to be reminded so acutely of what she had lost.

When she attempted to look away from the happy couple for a moment to compose herself, she found Josh staring at her with the oddest expression. She had no idea what he was thinking, whether it was about the fact that this could have been them or something else. Emily couldn't maintain his gaze – the guilt was too oppressive – so she looked back at the bride and groom as they exchanged vows, and she forced a smile.

Though the wedding ceremony was beautiful and mercifully short, it felt like it took ages as all those emotions swirled inside Emily's head. She was thankful when the minister announced the happy couple and they made their way down the aisle. Taking her place next in line beside Dan's brother, Peter, she linked arms with her escort. Em maintained her smile as she walked down the aisle and paused for a photo when the professional photographer stepped in front of them.

Soon, they arrived at the end of the aisle, at the pew where she had thought she saw Rob. To her surprise, when she looked to her right, he was there. As always, he read her so well and she knew by his half-smile that he noted the astonishment on her face. Before she could do anything about it, Peter guided her outside and around the back of the chapel.

Charlie had opted against a receiving line in favor of greeting her guests at their tables during the reception. Em knew she would be required to pose for photos while the guests had the cocktail hour in the tent that was set up between the hotel and the chapel. She wanted desperately to find Rob, to speak to him, and was determined to make her way back into the chapel so that she could catch him before he went to the reception.

Em turned back in the direction from whence she came, and ran smack into the chest of a man who wore a charcoal colored suit and a tie that matched the soft yellow of her dress. Emily teetered in her heels and strong arms grabbed her shoulders to steady her. She lifted her eyes and there was Rob. He looked at her with his huge grin, and her insides instantly turned to mush.

She swallowed hard, muttering a barely-audible, “Hi.”

Em stared at Rob, not quite sure if she was seeing things. She patted his chest and he huffed a little laugh.

“You're real.”

“I am. Did you think I wasn't?” he asked, though he surely read the answer in her expression. He still grinned at her.

She shrugged and lifted her hands to indicate it was true.

“What are you doing here?” Emily asked. She didn't want to sound ungrateful, but she was truly flabbergasted that Rob was standing in front of her right now.

She had wished for months that Rob would appear, that she hadn't run scared from him in L.A., that she could go back and start over, do it right this time. And here he stood at Charlie's wedding. She thought she'd hallucinated when she saw him at the back of the chapel, had just wanted that random guest to be him, but he was really here.

“I couldn't let you do this alone. I knew you wouldn't bring a date because you would try to spare his feelings, and that meant you'd be alone when you were blindsided by Annie and Josh's announcement.” His hands still rested on her shoulders and he gently rubbed her arms. She had missed his touch, how it seared her skin.

“What are you talking about?” Emily was confused and a little disoriented by Rob's presence. “Why would Annie and Josh have an announcement?”

Rob shook his head, closed his eyes and tipped his chin to the sky. Then he sighed, swiped his hands over his face, clasped them under his chin and spread apart his legs in a stance that said he was bracing himself. He looked at Emily.

“So you don't know yet?”

“What am I supposed to know?” What was he getting at? Sure, it was a little weird that Josh was at the wedding, but so was his whole family. She had known that they'd all still attend. Their families were friends and that wasn't going to change just because Emily and Josh broke up or because of the fallout from her 'fling' with Rob, as her mother called it. She'd been told as much by both her mother and Charlie months ago.

“I can't believe they haven't told you. I can see why they waited to tell everyone else, but they owe you the courtesy to give you a heads up, at least.”

Emily started to freak a little. What could possibly be so important that Rob would come all the way to Maine and crash her sister's wedding? Was Josh sick? Had Annie been taking care of him? She was an oncology nurse...

“Does Josh have cancer? Has Annie been keeping that from me?”

“Canc...what? No. I mean, I don't think he has cancer, no.” Rob made a noise of disbelief, somewhere between a laugh and a snort. “That might be better, actually.”

“How could it be better if Josh had cancer, Rob? I mean, I don't love him anymore and I don't want to get back together with him, but I also want him to have a good life. I'm the one who effectively cheated on
him
, remember? If it's not that, then what is it?” Emily got impatient.

“They're engaged.”

Emily blinked.
Did she hear him correctly?
“Did you say
engaged
?
Are you talking about Annie and Josh? My sister and my ex-boyfriend of five years?”

“Yes.”

“They aren't even dating. And how could
you
possibly know that if
I
don't?”

Rob explained that Jenna had been doing her daily search when she saw a small story with a headline,
Deac Roberts' ex goes back to her former flame, gets engaged.
She was astonished to see a picture of Emily in
Star.
She dug into the story a bit and it turned out that it wasn't a picture of Emily, but of her sister, Annie. And Josh. And, yes, they were getting engaged. The photographer on the story had thought it was Emily when he took the pictures and realized later that it wasn't. His editor ran with the story anyway.