Awake (23 page)

“Yes, it’s where we get married. Well, not
we
but you know what I mean.”

She smiled as I squirmed in embarrassment. If things had been different, if Eternal Light were just a simple way of living off the land and not about living forever then maybe we could’ve been married here one day. I wished that was true. I wanted so bad for Eternal Light to be an innocent alternate to the
normal
way of living and for Scarlett to stay here with us. I wasn’t going to get much more time with her but I desperately wanted it.

“Yeah, I know what you mean.”

“How is your arm?”

Her hand immediately went to the wound. “It’s okay. Fiona gave me ginger tea.”

“It is a good natural pain-killer.”

She smiled tightly. “So she said. It just tasted gross.”

I pushed the door to the chapel open and ignored where our conversation was headed. I knew it relieved pain; I’d used it when I broke my wrist a few years back but Scarlett was used to pills and modern medicine.

“It’s nice,” she said, looking around. It was a fairly simple hexagon shaped wooden building with a steeple roof and exposed, chunky beams that had wildflowers and vines wrapped around them for a wedding. I wished there was one on before the rituals, I would’ve love for Scarlett to witness a wedding Eternal Light style.

“It’s better when it’s decorated.”

“You love it here.” It wasn’t a question, she knew I did and I wasn’t ever going to hide that from her.

“I do, I won’t lie. But I understand what they want to do is very wrong and I don’t believe, for one second, that what they think is going to happen is actually going to happen. Please don’t doubt me, Scarlett, there is nothing that will change my mind, no matter how much I love my home and my community.”

“Promise me,” she whispered.

I didn’t hesitate when I said, “I promise. I love you so much more.”

Scarlett

FIONA LED ME
into the meadow, smiling warmly as if everything was completely normal. Her cult was there already, standing in a circle. They each held a white candle in a cup, even though it was daylight.

It was hot today, much too hot. I had the only spaghetti strap dress in, white, on because I woke up melting but it wasn’t doing much to keep me cool. That could also be because of Noah’s confession last night and the fact that my ‘father’ had cut me.

Noah was there, his eyes burning into me. I refused to look at him through fear of giving away our plan –
his
plan. I wasn’t even sure if I believed him, but he was all I had right now. I’d contemplated running off to the side Noah would be waiting but in another direction to go it alone but that was probably stupid. It was hard to know who to trust when every single person important to me had lied.

We walked slowly. Fiona kept breathing in and out deeply, and I wanted to laugh, but I was too scared. They all looked absolutely ridiculous, dressed only in white, lips moving with whispered words. It was probably about me being ‘the light’ again.

Without a word, Fiona took me to the centre of the circle and went to stand between Donald and Shaun-the-traitor. I licked my lips. What was about to happen now? On the floor in front of their feet were vines of what looked like ivy. I didn’t want to know what they were going to do with them but no doubt I would find out very soon.

The only comfort I had was knowing that they wouldn’t kill me before the final ritual in a few days time. But would they hurt me again? Would Noah stand by and let that happen for a second time? Probably, if he intervened they’d know he was – possibly – on my side and that would be it.

I hated placing my faith in a guy that had betrayed me and crushed my heart.

Donald picked up a vine and closed in. I braced myself, clenching my fists and breathing heavily. My cut started to sting but I ignored the pain.

Don’t hurt me. Please don’t hurt me.

He stopped and knelt down winding the vine around the bottom of my ankles. They were tying me up? My breathing came out in thick pants as he wrapped around and around until my ankle was covered.

With wide eyes, I looked at Fiona. She at least half explained what was going to happen. I knew we were going to a field and there would be chanting but I didn’t know about being tied up.

He stood a few feet away and with a warm smile said, “What are we but part of nature. Like trees breathing new life in spring, we will be born again. Into eternal light, you shall lead us. Wind around our souls and take us with you, my love. The Light, our saviour, my daughter.”

If I could move, I would’ve run right then. My fists trembled, digging into my legs where I tried to stop people seeing how scared I was. I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction, not that I thought they’d get any out of it anyway.

My eyes flicked to Noah. He looked like the rest of them, calm and happy. He looked like he didn’t care about me in the way he’d proclaimed yesterday, but I’d learned the hard way that the guy had the best bloody poker face, so I hoped he was pretending to fit in.

I was counting on him completely, and I hated that.

Fiona was the next to move, she picked up her vine and made her way over. She looked at me like she loved me, but she didn’t, not in any real way. If she did love me, she wouldn’t let this happen. I held myself tighter, my arm now throbbing as it crushed against my side.

Smiling, she bent her knees and wound the vine around my legs, starting where Donald left off. How long was this going to go on for? “You are the one that will lead us, Scarlett. Your gift grants us eternity.”

You’re bloody welcome.

Biting my lip, I nodded and stopped myself blinking so I could make my eyes tear up. I didn’t need them to trust me or think I was all for their cult now Noah was getting me out, but it’d help them relax, and I wanted to catch them off guard when I ran.

It was thirty-eight against two. We didn’t stand much chance, but I was determined to do everything I could to get away. All I wanted was to be back with my family.

I had a few apologies to make to Mum, Dad and Jeremy.

I closed my eyes as one by one they tied vines around my body. I hated not being able to move. There was about half a centimetre leeway where I could move and that felt tighter with every second. The vines bound me to the elbow and there was still one person left to go. Noah.

He stepped forwards, and I held my breath. This was the hardest one. I could push away the panic of being trapped but Noah having a hand in that was awful. When he was right in front of me, far enough from the others that he could show his true emotions, his face fell. His eyes looked haunted, pained. He didn’t want to do this. That meant something. Actually, that meant a lot.

“It’s okay,” I said under my breath, trying not to move my lips.

He reached around my back, feeding the vine to his other hand. I didn’t take my eyes off him. He worked slowly, eyes tight, jaw clenched, and it didn’t bother me as much. As stupid as it was to allow him to be my comfort, he was. We were in this together right now. He was following their orders, but I knew he was with me.

His breath blew across my neck as he leant around to wrap the vine around me. I closed my eyes and it was almost like we were back in my room, cuddled up on my bed with him kissing my neck and behind my ear.

“Don’t,” he said.

Stepping back, he turned and walked away, leaving the last knot as loose as he could get away with. He hadn’t alleviated on his ‘don’t’ but he didn’t need to. He knew I was thinking about the way things had been before all this happened, and I knew he wanted it back as much as I did.

When Noah stood back, I noticed that they’d all closed in, standing in front of me in a crowd rather than a circle. I stood my ground, lifting my chin to appear unaffected.

Fuck you all.

They can’t kill me. Yet.

“Let these vines bind her with nature, let her lead us into forever. She is the one; she is the light.” Their chant chilled me. It was repeated over and over until I wanted to scream. Even with the crazy chanting they still looked kind, like they would give you their last bloody Rolo.

I couldn’t move at all without hurting my arm more and that made me panic.

Closing my eyes, I tried to imagine I was somewhere else. I wanted to get out of the vines and be free, but I didn’t know how long they were going to keep me tied up. I had to think of something else because I was so close to struggling, and I was trying to get them to think I was coming around.

I refused to think of my parents or Jeremy because I wouldn’t be able to hold it together. Even though I missed them and just wanted to be home, I couldn’t cry over my family right now. I looked up at the bright sky and wondered how people like this could exist in such a beautiful place. They had the perfect location; everything was peaceful and pretty but they ruined it.

Evelyn’s pretty face drifted into my head. My sister. I smiled, finally being able to picture her doing something other than running with Jeremy for three seconds. I could still only see her profile but she was standing next to me, holding my hand. I felt love for her even though I didn’t remember it.

I will remember you, Evie.

I felt someone pull the vine behind me and slowly they were removed. I flexed my hands when they were free, noticing blood begin to seep through the bandage. It came as no surprise that it’d started bleeding again. I didn’t care.

“How do you feel?” Fiona asked as the last vine was removed.

I couldn’t tell her the truth but I couldn’t come right out and lie. “It was okay, I suppose. I don’t like not being able to move.” There, that wasn’t too bad but not so positive that she questioned why I was okay with the rituals so suddenly.

I honestly had no idea if she would suspect anything if I told her right now that I loved her and couldn’t wait to be the sacrifice. It wasn’t a risk I was willing to take, though.

“I can imagine that wasn’t pleasant. It is done now, and it means we are one step closer.”

I smiled tightly but didn’t reply. She could take that however she wanted.

“Let’s head back,” Donald said. “We have a communal dinner tonight so let’s make it a special one for Scarlett.”

A special dinner with all of the psychos.
Daddy
really knew what I wanted.

THE SKY WAS
now light orange where the sun had begun to set and it was still warm out. Everyone was outside around the large dug out seating area. Two small pit fires in the middle kept us warm. I was sitting with Donald and Fiona, with Shaun and Bethan beside Fiona.

Noah was here, too, but I ignored him as much as I could. We needed everyone to believe that he was just with me to get me here and I was still half angry with him. I had to thaw with everyone else the longer I stayed, but I wasn’t sure if forgiving Noah would be realistic, so I’d opted for pretending he didn’t exist.

Dinner was large stone baked pizzas with vegetarian toppings. I hated to like anything about this place and these people but they could cook. Living a life the way they do could be amazing if it weren’t for the added insanity.

No one spoke about the fact that they’d tied me up just a few short hours ago, but I did prefer it that way. I couldn’t pretend that I didn’t hate them if they spoke about one of the most terrifying things I’d been through.

Noah avoided me just enough but not too much that it looked wrong. He made the effort to speak to me a couple times. I’d overheard him telling his mum that he didn’t try too much because he wanted to give me space to realise what Eternal Light were about before we had the inevitable conversation about what he’d done. He was almost too good at lying that it made me question who his allegiance was to – again.

“Scarlett, would you like pepper and mushroom or spring onion and sweetcorn?” Fiona asked. “Or a little of both.”

“Onion and corn, please. I don’t like mushrooms.”

“Really? You used to like it.”

Did I? “Well, I don’t now.”

“Okay, I will be right back.”

Finn planted himself in Fiona’s seat and smiled over his shoulder. I couldn’t help the less than warm reception I gave him. Tightening my jaw, I made show of looking as far away as I could.