Avowed (The Manipulation Trilogy Book 3) (9 page)

“I was so sad and pleaded with anyone who would listen to me to let me see him, but they wouldn’t let me. For months I begged them to let me see him. I forgot everything else in my life. I just let the pain of losing my boyfriend consume me, and the need to have him in my life take over. He was my best friend and I was lost. I went to his parents one day and just as I was about to knock, the door opened.”

Abbi’s fist clenches in my hand and her jaw works back and forth.

“Leona walked out, shutting door behind her. She acted shocked to see me at first. I remember being confused. It was only seeing her that reminded me I hadn’t seen her for weeks, no months. Not since that night. That night I lost my future,” she says. Her voice has turned emotionless and I know this is it. This next part is what Leona did.

“What did you say to her?” I say as softly as I can. I really want to know what Leona did and I don’t want Abigail to stop speaking.

“I didn’t. I was too shocked at first. She looked sorry for me and tried to comfort me and when I asked if Damon was there she said he wouldn’t see me. She told me he decided we were too young and needed to live our lives. She said I should move on, that Damon said that’s what he wanted.”

I shake my head at Leona’s sneaky ways, looking at Abigail with pity. I really do feel sorry for her.

“Anger overtook me then and I started pounding on the closed door.” She says, heatedly. “He wanted me to just move on and he didn’t even have the guts to tell me to my face. I’ve never been so angry. Damon finally opened the door and he looked a state. He didn’t speak. He just looked at me like I was filth. I broke down and begged him to listen to me and speak to me but he was emotionless. Leona went to his side to guide him back inside and she smirked at me. I saw the real Leona in that second. Her touch on him was too familiar and I knew he’d moved on with my only friend. I was destroyed. I started following life and stopped living after that. I went through the motions and shut it all out, but it wasn’t until I’d see him out and he’d be living that I would break. I couldn’t let go because every time I did see him I’d see that same pain I felt reflected back at me. It wasn’t until I saw him with you that I could finally accept it was over. I’ve never seen him so happy Ella and that’s all we can ever want for people we love. The heart settles when you see someone you care for fall in love.”

Her words pin me in place but they don’t hurt me. I can see she’s accepted they’re over. Now I need to see if Damon fully accepts they are. I can’t live knowing that he could have his first love back if they speak and share the truth. Abbi didn’t cheat on him and I worry that if he knows that he will want her back. I’m testing fate by bringing her home with me but I need to know. I will always feel that insecure doubt until I know for sure.

“You and Damon have a lot to speak about Abigail. Are you ready?” I tentatively ask.

“I need to cancel my next appointment I think and just freshen up if that’s okay. Shall I follow you there?” she asks.

“Yes,” I reply. “It will give me a chance to speak to Damon first. I won’t tell him what you’ve said but you should tell him everything you remember and then see what he has to say.” I stand, giving her a smile when she stands too. We collect our things and part ways. I’m not sure if she will turn up but I hope she does.

CHAPTER NINE

October 6
th
2014

Damon

I’m pacing the floor in my home office. I can’t concentrate on anything. Ella left over an hour ago and I want her back home. I can’t say I know why she wanted to meet up with Abigail, because I don’t. I can’t think of one thing that should bring my wife and first girlfriend together in the same room, let alone meeting for tea.

I trust Ella implicitly and I know Abbi will do nothing to hurt her so I’m not sure what has me on edge. I’m burning a fucking hole in the wooden flooring with all my pacing. I’ve already texted Ella once so I could check on her. Her reply made me relax a little but I’ve since again taken up being a fucking pussy.

Why the hell am I nervous?

Hearing a car door slamming has my legs moving before I register what the sound is. I’m almost at the front door when I hear Ella’s mobile ringing. Her muttered words as she tries to locate her phone in her handbag makes me grin. I pause and wait for her to enter the house.

My wife makes my heart race whenever I see her. Hell my heart races when I just think about her, which is most of the day. The door opens and Ella steps in, mobile clutched to her ear.

“Hello?” she answers. She stops and frowns, still not having noticed me. “Hello?” After a pause she pulls the phone away and shrugs, shoving it back into her bag after ending the call. Ella moves forward just as I take a step towards her.

Looking up, her eyes clash with mine, and she stops. Her eyes widen and she swallows nervously. That one look makes me pause.
Why is my beauty nervous?
I close the gap between us and pull her into my arms, kissing her head. One hand rests on the small of her back and the other caresses our growing daughter.

Ella nuzzles my neck and chills run through me.
Fucking chills
. I chuckle at how much effect my wife has on me. She holds all the power, and she doesn’t even realise it. Whenever I speak of my love for her it’s not enough. Words can never describe how much I love my beauty. There aren’t enough words to convey my feelings for her so she would understand.

I can only
show
my love enough so she understands.  

Wrapping her arms around my shoulders, Ella kisses up my neck until her lips reach mine. I devour her mouth, and groan at her taste. She has her own flavour, she’s delectable. People would pay highly for a taste so divine.  

Nothing tastes better than Ella.

“Did you enjoy tea?” I ask against her lips.

“Mmm hmm,” she mumbles. Her tongue thrusts into my mouth, claiming me before she tears herself away. “No time for sexy time. Abbi is on her way. You need to talk.” Ella steps back as she says this and won’t make eye contact. So this is what has her nervous.

“Why is Abigail coming here beauty?” I ask. I have no issues with it if Ella needs this. I will do anything she needs to feel settled. I know she wants to help me crack my demons but what she doesn’t realise is that Abbi isn’t a demon for me, and Ella has already helped me face my demons. She’s already done what she’s now trying to do.

She’s already fixed me by being
her
.

“I, erm, I thought... Damon.” She looks frustrated as she tries to find the right words.

“Just tell me baby. I have no problem with Abbi being here if you’re comfortable with it, and I will speak to her about anything if it makes you happy.”

“It’s about the past Damon. I don’t think she did cheat,” she answers quickly. “There is a lot you assume but you’ve never given her the chance to explain her side.”

“What is there to explain Ella? I’ve got fucking photos showing her with a man, his hand slipping in her fucking trousers. She was out all night with him. I don’t need to have this dredged up when it’s pointless. It won’t change a fucking thing. Abbi is my past.” Ella holds up her hand to stop me from speaking.

“I know Damon. But she needs closure as much as you do.” I don’t need closure like she thinks but I’ll play along to keep my beauty happy. “She needs for you to know the truth before she can move on. Let her move on Damon.”

Ella’s words make me frown. I never really thought about Abbi’s feelings in all of this. Each time Abigail has tried to talk about that period in our life I refuse to acknowledge it. Not because I didn’t want to hear it, but because I knew it changed nothing. I didn’t want Abbi to get false hope that we could go back to what we were if she ever tried talking her way out of cheating. Not that she could talk her way out of it.

Photographs don’t lie.

“I’ll speak to her then but I don’t see what you hope to achieve baby. This still won’t be happy for Abbi, and I think it could cause more harm than good,” I tell her honestly.

“What if things aren’t as they seem Damon? What if she didn’t cheat?” she asks.

“She did,” I growl. “Ella pictures don’t lie. That’s all the proof I needed.”

“What if she was unaware? What if she passed out drunk or was drugged and doesn’t know something has been done to her?” My mind spins at Ella’s words. Why did I not think of that before? She gives me a small smile. “See, maybe things didn’t happen as you think.”

“It still changes nothing,” I say, pulling Ella back into my arms. It’s a bitter pill to swallow knowing that something could have happened to Abbi and she may not know about it. Why Ella feels she needs to speak to Abbi about that part of my past I have no clue. I can see no happy ending in speaking things through, and it could cause more damage than good. Abigail is my past. Ella and my daughter are my future, and that’s all that matters.  If this is something Ella needs to do then I won’t stand in her way. She is my fucking whole world and I won’t deny her anything.

Even if it means more pain for Abbi.

“She’ll hopefully be here soon. I didn’t tell her anything you’ve told me. Do you still have your proof?” she questions.

I frown and really think about it. It’s been years since I’ve seen those pictures but I know they’re around somewhere. The last time I saw the photographs were when Pops was still alive. We were sharing past photos and he wanted to know what happened to harden me to the world. I came across those pictures then, and shoved them in my safe.

“I have them somewhere,” I say.

“I think you might need them,” Ella replies softly.

I nod and kiss her thoroughly. I know my beauty is doing this for me and I fucking love her for it but I think it’s going to stir up more trouble. But if Ella is right then Abbi deserves to know.

“I’ll go and see if I can find them,” I say, pulling away. Placing one last chaste kiss against her soft lips, I leave her to wait for Abbi whilst I move to the home office to check the safe. It takes me ten minutes to locate them and when I do my gut tightens.

This is not going to be good for Abbi. It’s going to hurt her and I still, to this day, hate seeing her in pain. That’s one of the reasons I had to cut her out my life. I knew she would make me forgive her and I wasn’t ready to. Over time I just decided it was better left alone. I now understand that that was probably a mistake. Maybe Abigail would have moved on before now if I’d have given her closure.

I look at the photo, really look at it, and for the first time I realise I could have been wrong all this time. It’s a grainy image of Abbi laying on a bed. Her top is bunched above her breasts. Some punk has his hand moulded against her tit as he lays at the side of her and his other hand is slipping into the top of her unbuttoned trousers. Her eyes are shut, and I always thought they were shut from pleasure but she could just as easy be passed out.

When Leona gave me this picture I saw red. Abigail threw our relationship away for a quick lay I thought, but I could’ve been wrong. I never really gave it much thought before, but looking at the photo again makes me realise that at least three people were in that room. Abbi, the man, and whoever took the photo.

I wouldn’t change one thing from my past because it all led me to my beauty, but I now wish I could have at least have given Abbi the chance to explain what she knows so she wouldn’t have suffered for so long. Not that anything would have turned out differently. Fate had a way of making my life complete by giving me Ella.

She may have been broken but we’ve fixed each other.

I make my way to the lounge and find Ella nervously fidgeting with her hands in her lap. I know exactly what’s going on in her mind and I need to get those fucking thoughts out of there. This talk with Abbi changes nothing.

“Beauty,” I whisper. Ella’s head swings in my direction and I can see fear in her emerald eyes. I stride over to her and pull her up into my arms before taking a seat and placing her in my lap. I put the photo down on the side table and cup Ella’s face with a hand. “I love you. No one but you. You are my everything.” My other hand comes to rest against her stomach. “You and our daughter are my life and nothing
, nothing
, will fucking change that. You’re it for me. You’re mine. Both of you.”

I kiss her, letting her taste my desperate need for her. It’s never enough, I always want more. I will never have enough of my wife.

“How can you be sure?” she says quietly. And there is it. The real reason behind Ella needing me to do this. She needs reassurance of my love, and I’m going to make sure I do everything I can to give her what she needs.

“Love can't be deserved or earned. It can't be claimed, ordered, or forced. Love just is, baby. You don't pick and choose. Love does. The heart does. My heart has, and it's chosen you Ella. Forever. You are my forever beauty,” I tell her honestly. “You’re blind to my feelings, Ella. I love you more than I can express.” I look deep into her eyes as I give her the words I know she needs. “My soul has attached to you and I’m keeping you. Forever. What do I have to do to get you to believe me? My heart hadn’t beaten for so long. I’m not sure it ever did. Not until I saw you. You kick started my heart and gave me life. You made me live baby. You gave me breath to survive, strength to believe, and hope to feel. You’re my home Ella and you’re the first and last home for me. Everything begins and ends with you. You and our family.” I say, caressing our daughter.

“You’re my home too,” she whispers. I can hear she’s getting choked up and I don’t want that. I never want Ella to be anything but happy. My beauty makes me feel exultant with love and I want to be that for her.

I want to be her every fucking thing.

“You’re everything good in my life, and nothing I deserve. I’m convinced you’re also everything good in the fucking world but I know you’ll say I’m being biased,” I say with a chuckle. Ella slaps my chest with a small smile but I can see her love shining deep within her forest green eyes. “I’m yours. I’m only yours Ella.”

“I love you,” she whispers, with a smile. I cup her face before crashing my lips to hers. I explore her mouth slowly, expressing my love through our kiss. My cock twitches when she rubs against me, pressing into the kiss. Claiming me. My wife moaning is the sexiest fucking sound I’ve ever heard. It’s right up there with her gasping my name.

A soft knock on the door brings us out of the moment but I don’t move to answer it yet. I rest my forehead against Ella’s and get my breathing under control.

I lose all control in Ella’s arms.

“You should get that. I’m going to give you some time alone.” Ella says as she stares into my eyes. I could lose myself in her stare. Placing one last kiss on her nose, I help her stand and slap her arse. She glares at me before reaching around me, slapping my arse back.

I walk away laughing and go to answer the door. My wife’s giggle follows me. I open the door and come face to face with Leona.

What the fuck?

“What are you doing here?” I growl. Rage builds in my gut as I look at my former friend. Disgust flows through my veins as I take in her disconcerted state. 

“I came to say I’m sorry.”

“Okay,” I say, closing the door. Leona’s hand shoots out to press against the wooden door to hold it open.

“Wait... I’m sorry, Damon. I’m sorry for what I did. Please forgive me,” she rasps. Tears fill her eyes but I know it’s a ploy. Leona is the queen of waterworks.

“I accept your apology. I don’t and won’t ever forgive you Leona, but I accept your apology. What you did was fucked up and I won’t have that in my wife and daughter’s life. This is the end of the road. I have nothing more to say to you. Goodbye.” 

“I love you,” she whispers.

“I love my wife.”

“I... I know that Damon.” Leona’s voice catches and she looks away. “I’m sorry.”

“You should leave,” I demand. “I don’t want to see you again Leona. I want you nowhere near me or my family.”

“I know. Goodbye Damon.” She turns and walks away. Ella’s arms wrap around me from behind as much as they can with her bump in the way. I know she’s just heard what I said to Leona.

A car coming up the drive draws my attention and Leona looks up at the same time. A sneer appears on her face as she sees Abigail pulling up. Abbi climbs from her car, and spares a glance at Leona before looking at me. A genuine smile pulls on her lips as she makes her way towards Ella and me. Her whole face lights up and she looks just like she did the first time I met her.