Assure Her (Assured Distraction Book 1) (29 page)

Overcoming her initial shock at seeing him in their studio, she responded, “No, you don’t understand, Ryder. I do want you to talk to me. That’s all I’ve wanted all along. I honestly think we just need a do-over. I want
my Dad
to tell me a story this time, and I want to know that this time he’s going to be here when we are done, instead of running out on me.” She pulled him to the couches and sat down. He seemed to have difficulty understanding how she could be so forgiving, but it got to him like nothing ever had before.

By now, Ryder Steel had tears rolling down his cheeks. This big rock-and-roll legend, covered in tats and piercings covering every visible surface, with a face weathered beyond his years, couldn’t speak. He fell to his knees in front of Chandler, laid his head in her lap and cried like a baby. KeeMac and the others quietly walked out to give them the privacy they needed to cope with the tragedy that caused the twenty-one-year delay in this father meeting his daughter.

After some time had passed, he was finally able to regain his composure and spoke. “I was praying you would forgive me, Chandler, for running out on you like that. I knew it when I saw you,” he finally said to her. He sat up in front of her and took out contacts revealing aqua blue eyes, exactly like hers.

“OH. MY. GOD!” Chandler couldn’t believe what she was seeing. “Why? Why did you cover them up?”

“The first douchebag manager we had said they were too hard to see under the lights, so I started wearing brown ones. The two colors together made my eyes look wicked, and I was a kid then so looking ‘wicked’ sounded like a damn good idea. By the time we made it big, everyone was so used to them I just never changed them. Only my inner circle and family has ever seen me without them.”

He stood up, pulling her up to him and wrapped her in a bear hug lifting her small frame from the ground and shook her all around. “You don’t know what’s going through my mind, Chandler. I have so many things I want to ask you, so much I want to know about your entire life. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you, but I never knew.

“Your grandparents took my precious Laina away from me. We were so in love, Chandler. Please believe that they refused to tell me anything about her. Said it was for both our own good. Fucking people, they kept the greatest thing I’ve ever done in twenty-one years from me! I could kill them all!”

“I don’t understand how you never found me before, Ryder. Didn’t you ever try to look for my mom and me?”

He pulled Chandler back to the couch. “I didn’t know about you, Chandler. You just don’t know what happened to me during that time. The band had been trying so hard to get our name out there and get signed with a label. Hell, all we ever wanted was to play our music and be on top. When we finally got the chance to go, we had to jump at it, but it meant leaving your mom behind. She was ready to leave for UT when this shit happened and it was fast.” He told her about the night she shared the possibility of being pregnant with him.

“We were in Austin ‘til after three, and when I finally rolled my sorry ass into bed, I slept most of the next day. I called your mom’s house and got nothing. No one would answer the damn phone anywhere. I went over there and the place was locked up tight, and both cars gone. I couldn’t find them anywhere. I even went to the police and they took one look at me and informed me that they had no fucking reports of any wrongdoings and that adults could leave without my permission. Her phone was disconnected the next day. After that, I heard nothing. My parents tried to help, too. When her parents came home a week later without Laina, the sorry pieces of shit refused to give me any information other than she was doing what she wanted, and it had nothing to do with me. She never tried to contact me so I figured they were telling the truth.

“It was the worst fucking time in my life, Chandler. You have to know that. The band was opening for a huge band, and we were getting noticed by a lot of labels. Our fame kinda’ blew up. I was totally fucked-up though after losing your mom. I started drinking more, and then came the drugs. Hell, they were easy to come by with so many assholes out there ready to deliver. A year later, I was in rehab where I wrote some of our best music to-date. That’s where
Stolen
was written. It was and still is our biggest hit. The lyrics to that song came out of me during the worst days of my life.

“Shortly after I got out of that damn rehab, my parents came to Austin to tell me Laina was dead. I went completely off the deep end. I hadn’t seen her. I never got to say goodbye. I couldn’t handle it all. My first thought was I needed a drink and something to make me forget. Honestly, I wanted to forget it all. I was ready to die. When I started talking like that, the band called my parents and they got me into a private psychiatric facility. Those were really dark days but I came out a hell of a lot better for it. I truly dealt with my grief and my addictions and my depression. I fight the fucking addictions every day. Thank God, I worked through my depression and I still see my therapist occasionally.

“I’m so sorry that I left you like that when I saw you in Denver. I couldn’t deal with it. I’ve spent the last weekend in the facility for some intense sessions. When I saw you, with my own eyes staring back at me, and heard your story, it was like re-living the worst fucking nightmare of my life. Now that I’ve had time to get my head together, I realized what an idiot I was to walk away. At that moment, it was the best I could do for both of us. Please say you’ll forgive me? I’ll understand if you don’t, or need time on your own to consider everything I’ve told you. Fuck, it’s a lot, I know. I’m ready to deal with the blow back from my actions but I hope you will find a place in your heart to forgive one sorry ass, shell-shocked dad,” he asked, with pleading and tears in his eyes.

All Chandler could do was wrap him in a hug and hold on for dear life. They had found each other, finally. And she had no intentions of letting him go.

KeeMac came in some time later, barely cracking the door, afraid of what he might find. When he saw them talking and laughing with each other, he was relieved, and knocked louder as he opened the door wider.

“Come on in, Keeton. He’s not going anywhere. But please, don’t go all fanboy on my dad, OK?” Looking at Ryder she whispered, “I think he’s got a man crush on you and your guitar, Dad.” Ryder beamed at her when she called him ‘Dad’ and he broke into a fresh round of happy tears as he held her hands, and laughed at KeeMac’s humble, sheepish expression as if he was confessing to his fanboy tendencies.

After having a few more laughs at Keeton’s expense, it seemed to help ease the tension, and they continued their conversation. Ryder looked inquisitively at Chandler, and asked, “How did you even find out who I was? I haven’t used that fucking name since I left Smithville twenty years ago.”

“Our wonderful manager, Cash, wanted to help me after I lost my parents. He got the people from the label to dig up any info on you they could find. They found out you were from Smithville, and discovered that your parents,” she gave him a big smile, “my grandparents, are still living there. KeeMac called them and spoke to your mom, and she gave him your name and cell number!”

“Damn crazy lady. Guess I’ll have to change my number again if she’s handing it out like that. Gotta love her though, she put up with my crazy shit for a lot of long years.”

“Yes, and don’t talk about my grandma like that!” she half-teased. “She’s awesome, and I already love her. I’ve never had grandparents! My parents were only children and their parents were gone already when I was born.” Chandler told Ryder about the visit she made to Smithville. He was excited she had made a connection with his family already.

“I wish I had been there to see the reunion, but we’ll have plenty more like that now that you’re here. I have some family I need to spend a lot more time with, now that I have my family back.” Ryder pulled Chandler into a hug.

They were lost in their own world, with so much time to make up for, when Paul stepped in the studio looking for Ryder. When he spotted Chandler, he knew what was going on. Without hesitating to put his opinion out there, he said, “I think, considering all the loose ends to her story, you should at least do a DNA test, Ryder.”

“And I think you can go look for a new fucking job, asshole!” He was in his abrasive manager’s face in a second. “You could have at least told me about this and let me make the decision about seeing her.”

“You pay me to keep the crazies away, remember?” Paul barked back, not backing down.

“YOU ARE DONE! I’ll call the fucking label now and tell them you are no longer representing us and will be hiring new management as soon as possible. I want you to get the hell out of here.”

Paul spun around to leave and said, “The entire band gets a vote on this, and they won’t vote against me,” and slammed the door behind him.

Turning back to Chandler, Ryder said, “We have so much more to talk about, please say you’ll come to the hotel and spend some time with me. I’ve just found you. I don’t want to let you go. And, you, KeeMac, please join us, if that’s what Chandler wants. Y’all are together, yeah?”

Looking at Chandler, KeeMac pulled her to his side to answer. “Yes, and I’m mad in love with your daughter, just so you know.” Chandler was beaming at his remark.

“Great way to break the ice there, KeeMac. Is that really your name?”

“No, my name is Keeton McDonald, sir. But only Chandler calls me Keeton.”

“Damn, ‘sir’, huh? Makes me feel old.” He smiled at them both then looked more pointedly at his daughter. “And I’m judging by the way she looks at you, she feels the same?” Chandler nodded. “Hmm, I’m not sure how I feel about my only child already being in love at your age.” Looking at her he gave her a smirk like KeeMac sometimes did, and asked, “How old are you, exactly?”

She had to laugh at that. “I’m twenty-one.”

“Oh, barely legal, I see.” He gave her a little knowing smirk. “I still remember what that’s like. So, y’all will both come and stay at the hotel with me? Please?”

“We both have houses in Austin, but sure we can stay with you if you want?” Chandler wanted nothing more and got a nod from KeeMac.

Even though it was late when they got to Ryder’s suite, they were all too keyed up to think about sleeping. “Chandler, I want to know all about your life. Start with your earliest memory. I feel like I’ve been robbed.”

Chandler did as he asked and finally when the sun started peeking in the next morning, she joined KeeMac in the second bedroom of the suite. “Babe, what time is it? It sucks sleeping without you.”

“The sun’s coming up, go back to sleep. I’m here now.” She spooned up to him and he kissed her shoulder.

****

W
aking up in the early afternoon to sounds coming from the living area, Chandler peeked around the door and saw Paul and the rest of the band with Ryder.

“Fucking hell you will. You cannot fire me. I do everything for you guys without asking any questions. I make things happen for you. I was just looking out for what was best for the band, Ryder. You can’t afford shit to hit the fan right now. I was just trying to do damage control before it got out of hand. One bad spotlight on the band from the press could get your tour pulled. Now is NOT the time to fuck things up! Don’t forget all the shit I know that goes on. I could make a fortune with all the shit I know about the women, and the drugs and the parties,” Paul threatened.

“Too. Fucking. Bad. You have done nothing but cause problems for us for the past four months of this tour. Like I said before, asshat, You. Are. Done.” Ryder was yelling now.

The rest of the band agreed with Ryder, as he knew they would now that they understood what was going on in his personal life. “Now get the hell out! Find yourself another group of suckers to take you on.”

“I’ve worked too damn hard making this band great. Why would I want to start over?”

“Because it’s time, Paul. Now fuck off and get out of my room before I throw your ass out. And, don’t ever fucking threaten me with shit again. I’ll have one of your favorite lawyers send you a copy of the Non-Disclosure Agreement you signed as part of your representation contract, asshole. Now, go quietly and maybe there’ll be a severance package in it for ya.” Ryder was obviously serious.

Paul finally picked up his laptop and stormed out.

Once he cleared the doorway, Chandler and KeeMac both came out of their room. “I’m so sorry we interrupted. We can go downstairs and get coffee or something and give you guys some privacy.”

“No, I’m glad y’all are finally up. We have coffee there,” he said, pointing to the service by the table. “Breakfast, too. If you want something else, we can call room service.”

“This is good, thanks.” KeeMac poured them both large cups.

“I want you both to meet the band. I’ve been filling them in on all that’s happened.” He introduced them to each member, who shook hands with KeeMac and hugged Chandler. She was surprised at the reception she received from them, and from the look on his face she could tell that KeeMac was in barely-contained fanboy mode again.

“Chandler, these guys all knew your mom. She was our number one fan. She was the roadie, the groupie, the manager and if we were too fucked-up, our designated driver, too. She rarely missed a show, from our very first one in La Grange.” He saw Chandler’s expression and knew she still had so many questions.

“I want to spend today answering all the questions I know you have about Laina. And you can start as soon as you are ready.” The band’s member looked at Ryder like he was an alien. He hadn’t spoken about her since the day he’d changed his name.

“Just tell me about her. All of you, please?”

“Your mom was beautiful, Chandler. You look so much like her in the face and your black hair that I have to remember it’s you, and not her. When we were leaving the stage during sound check in Denver and I looked at you that first time, I thought God was playing a trick on me, or maybe it was the damn devil torturing me.” The band spent the next three hours sitting with them telling Chandler all they could remember about her mother. KeeMac was happy that Chandler was getting this from them. He hoped it would help her heal from all she had lost.