As Fate Would Have It (9 page)

"I told you to shut up." He lashed the belt in her direction. "Those sluts deserved their punishment. Selling their bodies, polluting humankind, dragging men to the depths of their depravity. Death came too soon for them."

"You killed them? All of them?" She continued to put space between them, keeping her wits by sheer will power.

"As I shall kill you. After you have been punished for your sins to mankind."

"No!"

"How dare you tell me what to do? No one tells me what to do! Filthy whore!" He dived after her, grabbing her leg as she tried to wiggle away. One hand secured her ankle, the other shifted quickly past her knee. Panting, she kicked, managing to catch him in the chin with one heel. "Granny!" The word burst out of her mouth as she focused on staying alive until the guys rushed to her rescue. Not bothering to check the damage, she reached desperately for the lamp. Falling short of her mark, her fingers grasped onto the alarm clock, clinging to it for dear life.

Jack groaned, but lunged for her once more.

Twisting, she stumbled to her feet, facing his angered, wild face. Hiding the clock behind her back, she retreated one more step. "Granny! Granny panties!" Where were they when she needed them?

He stalked her, backing off the bed, and lightly stepped closer. "Drop it, sinner. Hell is waiting."

Clutching the metal like a baseball, she prepared to defend herself. Watching him edge closer, she played her chances. With one more movement, she brought the clock up with all her might, crushing it against his nose. Blood dripped as he covered the injured area, a low moan of pain escaping. Taking advantage of the momentary reprieve, she bashed him over the head while bringing her knee up, hitting him square in the groin.

The door burst open and men tumbled in, weapons drawn and yelling. Brie ignored them.

Jack had fallen to the floor holding his privates after her attack, litanies of curses flowing from his mouth. Flecks of blood dripped from his injured nose. His head didn't look any worse for wear. Figures he would have a hard head.

Rage broke free. Brie tossed aside the clock, letting it crash into the wall. "You sick asshole. I hope you rot in Hell." With that she picked up the lamp, lifting it to bring down on his head once more. Strong hands grabbed her upper arms, before snaring the lamp from her grasp.

Lifting her foot, she prepared to ensure Jack wouldn't have further thoughts of sex for at least a couple more days. Strong arms wrapped around her. Fighting the hold, she finally relented when Rye gave her a little shake.

Gary circled around the mob of officers wrestling with Jack. Shaking his head, he smiled at Brie.

"Give me your gun," Brie demanded, anger and indignation running high.

Rye tossed the lamp onto the muddled comforter on the bed, still standing behind her. "He's not worth killing, Squirrel."

Twisting her neck, she frowned up at him. "Who said anything about killing?" Her eyes fell on Jack struggling with the officers who had his arms twisted back, handcuffs in place. A sigh of disgust followed. "I was going to castrate him the efficient and permanent way."

Several sets of eyes jerked up, hearing her words. More than one man in the room cringed noticeably.

Rye pulled her back against his chest, his breath rasping over her ear. Two uniformed cops wrestled Jack to his feet, dragging him out of the room, his threats and cries of retribution ignored.

Gary paused in front of them, gesturing to the floor where the clock landed. "Pretty good job, especially for a rookie."

Leaning against Rye's chest, she gave the redhead a wan smile. The adrenalin rush faded, leaving fatigue in its wake. All she wanted was to get out of those stinking shoes and scrub herself raw where the leech had touched her.

"Proves one thing." Rye wrapped one arm tightly around her.

"What's that?" Gary's gaze raked over Brie once more.

"Never mess with a woman on the rag," Rye finished in a deadpan voice.

Brie elbowed him in the ribs. Gary just snickered and shook his head.

Chapter 21

"Expect strong storms this evening, some may be severe…" The weatherman droned on, pointing at radar and satellite images.

Brie sat on the sofa, curled up with her newly purchased book. One pillow nestled on her lap, serving as a prop for her arm.

"You do have a flashlight, right?" Rye asked, setting the TV remote aside. The recliner gave a muted thump as he let down the footrest and sat forward. Having learned from experience, he decided it was best to be prepared when it came to the unpredictable Mother Nature.

Turning another page, she absently answered. "Under the bed." Not bothering to look up, she continued reading.

Standing, Rye shook his head at her. What a sight she made chewing her bottom lip, curled up like a cuddly kitten. Damn cute when she wasn't chewing on his ass.

Heading back to her bedroom, he kneeled, pulling the bed skirt aside. Sure enough, a large black flashlight rested just before him, right beside a shoe box. What would she hide in such a place? Intrigued, Rye shifted back enough to glance toward the door. She would be too absorbed in her book to come looking for him for a couple of minutes. Grabbing the container, he quietly pulled off the lid.

He grinned widely at the surprising discovery.

Pulling it out of the box, he snickered, automatically reaching for the bottom of the toy and giving it a slight twist. A low humming sounded as the toy began to move. Damn, this one was huge. Purple, too
.
Not that he saw an extraordinary amount of vibrators and other toys, but, he had been around the block a time or two. Also, the local sex shop managed to tweak his interest now and again.

Brie, though? Why the little deceiver. Guess it's true what they say about the quiet ones after all.

The wicked thought entered his mind. Oh, yeah. No way could he let this opportunity pass.

Standing up, the toy grasped solidly in one hand, he cranked the control again, this time to full power as he started back down the hall.

Brie's head snapped up as he approached, wide eyes glanced at the object before meeting his. Color blossomed across her face and neck. Mouth gaped open, she simply stared.

"Interesting choice of a flashlight." He prided himself on the flat comment even as the toy buzzed and gyrated loudly in the silence of the moment.

A squeak escaped from her throat. "But… well. I don't. I … haven't." She stammered, eyes quickly lowering as she gathered her scattered wits.

Biting back a grin, Rye pressed a bit harder. "I believe almost every woman in America has one of these." He glanced down at his hand. "Although maybe not quite this large."

Franticly, her mouth opened and shut a couple of times before she spoke. "Annie." The word blurted out.

Tilting his head in question, Rye shook the toy in her direction. "You named it?" He couldn't suppress the chuckle at that thought.
What woman would name her male toy after another woman?

"NO!" If possible, her face flamed a bit brighter. Her hands flew to her face, head shaking back and forth. "It's Annie's… fault." A few deep breaths followed as she struggled for composure.

"Uh huh." Enjoying her squirming, he waited patiently for the rest of the story.

Brie leaned back into the corner of the couch, scrunching her legs under her, the book face down on top of the overstuffed blue pillow resting on her lap. She reminded him of a cornered little kitten. A bit unsure, yet putting forth it's best bluff.

"Annie's anniversary. She wanted… something to surprise her husband." Absently drawing circles on the pillow, she focused her attention on it. "I got dragged with her." The quiet voice held steady.

"Go on." He turned the motor down on the device.

Her eyes met his. "It was a sale. Two for the price of one." She looked away once more. Fingers tapped on the now forgotten book.

He should have known.
A sale.
Mentally shaking his head, he prodded her again. "And?"

"Well, she said she always wanted… that." She gestured in his direction. "But, always thought it was too much money. She harassed me into splitting the cost with her so that she could buy it this time."

He grinned evilly down at her. "So, you and Annie are… tight?"

Shock crossed her face, quickly followed by anger. A pillow sailed by his head. "You heathen! I don't use the thing! I swear! You, you…" She searched for the perfect insult.

Laughter burst forth.
So, my little kitten can flash her claws as well
. The thought traveled straight to his groin. The fiery ones always attracted him. Good thing she didn't have anything more damaging than pillows at the moment. Given an opportunity, he figured she would send him dodging far sharper objects.

Her hand grabbed another pillow, hauling it back in preparation.

Shaking "Annie" at her once more, he shook his head. "Uh uh."

The second pillow hit him smack in the mouth.

Catching it on the rebound, he tossed it onto the far corner of the couch. Turning, he started back down the hall and paused. "If we do lose power, we can always play hide and seek with Annie." He waggled his eyebrows for effect.

"Pervert!"

He grinned back at her outburst. "The jury is still out, baby. But, I'll have you know I'm quite good at what I do." Chest puffed out, he strode confidently back up the hall, snickering to himself. Maybe, just maybe, Annie would make a reappearance some time soon
.
His mind whirled with possibilities.

Sighing, Brie bounded over, grabbing the toy from his grasp. "Give me that. I swear. What am I to do with you?" Her eyes narrowed in irritation.

A wicked grin split his face. Boy, did he have some ideas on that one.

A knock on the door startled them both. Uncertain who might be showing at dusk, Rye headed to the front door, waving Brie behind him. She shot him another irritated glance, but he ignored her. Better safe than sorry. After peeping through the small hole in the door, he opened it with a small shake of his head. A smile plastered itself on his face.

"Why, Thelma. Jane. What brings you over at this hour?"

Belatedly, Brie realized she stood just a few steps away still holding onto the sex toy. Gasping, she desperately sought a hiding place.

"Hello, dear. I just thought to stop in and check on you two." The blue-haired woman pushed her way through the door, pausing in the foyer when she saw Brie. Her purple shirt and pant suit accented the hair color. "Oh, there she is."

Freezing, Brie hid the toy behind her back, grinning nervously at their spontaneous company. She began to inch backward.

Jane followed behind Thelma, carrying a tray of cookies. Her bright yellow sundress could be used to land a small plane in the pitch dark if the airport lost electricity. Her dark hair curled in small waves around her head. "We thought you two might get a bit hungry. All that exertion, you know." She winked at Rye, heading toward the kitchen table.

Rye smiled politely. Shooting a glance at Brie, he managed to stifle a laugh. Her mortified expression and the flushing would clue a tortoise in that something was up. These two ladies commanded much more intuition than that. He stood back, waiting to see what Brie managed to come up with to get out of this embarrassing predicament.

"Hello, Thelma. Hi, Jane. I was just heading to the bathroom…" Brie took another cautious step backward, making sure to continue facing the two women.

Not to be deterred, Thelma quickly stepped in Brie's direction. "What do you have behind your back?" She turned back to glance at Rye. "Did I interrupt something important?"

He gave his best innocent expression.

Brie stood in mute silence, giving a small shake of her head. As Jane moved in, like a hound scenting a squirrel, Brie sent him a pleading look.

"Oh, I must have." She stepped closer to Brie and leaned in and whispered in a conspiring tone. "You can tell me, dear. We are near enough family, after all." She twisted attempting to see behind Brie's back.

Thelma zipped over, closing in on Brie as well. "Oh. You just have to show us now. Is it a ring? Are you two tying the knot?" She glanced hopefully at Rye.

Brie sidestepped, keeping the item well hidden. "Umm. Neither." Giving her best charming smile, she assured them, "It's nothing really." The color rose in her face.

Thelma patted her arm, her purple T-shirt striking in the light. Feinting left, she quickly stepped to the right, grabbing her wrist in the process. "Oh, good graces!" Fanning herself, she took a step back. Releasing Brie's wrist, she stared at the large item.

All eyes centered on Brie and the object in her possession. She squirmed under the scrutiny, her color brightening to resemble a steamed tomato.

"Oh, my. Did you ever see such, Thelma?" Jane grabbed it out of Brie's slack hand. "Hmmm. I believe this is one of those new fangled BOB thingys." She turned it this way and that, checking it over.

Thelma nodded. "It's sure the biggest one of those doohickies I've ever seen." She stared a moment longer. "They are calling them BOBs nowadays? Back in my day…"

"Heard that on some court show, interesting enough. Stands for 'battery operated boyfriend', they claimed." Jane talked over a mumbling Thelma.

Brie's mouth fell open, no words tumbled forth. Rye shook his head, grinning widely. Seems the little old ladies knew a thing or two about bedroom goodies.

A gleam appeared in Thelma's eye as she grinned at Rye. "Why, young man, I'm surprised. Here I thought you had quite a package and all. Guess if you have to use that jolly maker, then you missed out on the line when they were passing out male hardware."

"Bad plumbing," Brie mumbled, attempting to explain. "We're not…"

Thelma tsked and eyed Rye's crotch. "Oh, dear. Now that
is
a shame."

Rye's jaw tensed as his cheek twitched. How in the world did this situation get so twisted around?

"Have you tried those little blue pills?" Thelma pursed her lips together. He didn't answer fast enough as she forged ahead. "Lorene. Brie, you know Lorene up the street?"

Brie nodded and sighed, obviously thankful to have the attention on Rye instead of her for the moment.

"Well, poor Charles's plumbing was bad too until he started taking that pill. Now she claims he's as good as new, maybe even better."

Jane nodded. "Lorene told me just the other day that those pills are so great that if she needed a tomato stake, she knew Charles had one stiff and ready to go."

The ladies twittered.

"I … we…" Brie stammered.

Gesturing at Rye once more, Thelma consoled her. "Oh, no need to explain, dear. If he ain't got enough to please ya, then you gotta do whatcha gotta do. I hear that Mr Smith that lived three doors down has problems getting his to work at times. The Mrs visited one of those sex shops and never seen a happier woman after that."

Nodding, Jane added, "Yeah. And, the Clark lady that lives behind Martha, she couldn't live without hers, I heard. Seems, that husband had a bad accident and lost his. She said he was good around the house, but in bed, she had to take matters into her own hand."

"Literally?" Rye snorted.

Thelma narrowed her eyes at him. "You know, Jane. Wasn't there something on that education channel about penis size? That one place just pulled on them each day. Made them bigger that way." She retreated to the front door.

Rye winced at the thought. Hell, no. No one was going to be doing any such thing to him. Not that he needed it anyway. "No, no. I'm perfectly normal, ladies. In fact, if truth be told, I'm better than average." He defended his size sternly, satisfied they would listen and drop the subject. Cops and criminals alike shut their mouth when he used that tone. Little old ladies would fall in line just as easily.

Jane handed him the toy as she followed Thelma to the front door. "Go have some fun, Brie. If your world doesn't get rocked, let me know. My grandson has this friend…"

"Her world is being rocked just fine!" Rye jumped in, insulted at all the insinuations, his temper rushing to the surface.

Brie blinked at him in surprise at the outburst.

Thelma leaned in to whisper in the younger woman's ear. "He's something to look at anyway. Ain't it a shame he didn't come equipped, too."

Brie choked as Thelma headed out the door and to the sidewalk, catching up with Jane, jabbering away as they headed back to their homes.

Rye retreated to replace the toy before someone else wandered up and questioned his endowments. He would be stuck with a squirrel, albeit a sexy one, who happened to live in the neighborhood of crazy, nosy neighbors. He also knew that in less than ten minutes the rest of the neighbors would all understand that he lacked physical endowments enough to please a woman.

This just wasn't his week.

"I can't believe you!" Brie stomped after him down the hall.

Tucking "Annie" away in her box, he quickly left the bedroom, meeting her in the hall. "Me?"