Arranged by the Stars (18 page)

She swallowed
against a dry throat. “I am not sure I know what
‘
that’
is?”

As he continued to pump
against her with his fingers and circle his thumb over her clit,
Ash knew that she was in a new kind of pleasure trove. “Kieran, I
am ready now.” She hitched higher and pulled him closer. Ready to
burst with the power of whatever was about to come, she waited for
him to enter her. With this feeling of pure pleasure she knew she
could withstand any pain. But instead of giving her what she wanted
he continued his actions and she gasped as small spasms of pleasure
erupted inside her.

*****

Watching Ash come was the
most beautiful experience. When she grabbed him by the shoulders
and screamed the words he was so desperate to hear, he couldn’t
deny her any longer. “I need you. Inside me. Now.”

It took him moments to
open the bedside drawer and sheath himself with the condom. But the
need to be inside her was unbearable.

She was wet and ready for
him but he knew this was her first time so he entered her slowly.
He teased and tested. He saw her pupils dilate and he could see her
watch him and he could tell she was as fascinated as he was. He’d
never been filled with such need to possess someone, but when it
came to Ash, all the rules went out the door. She was in a league
of her own.

When he entered her, she
clutched his shoulders and screamed his name. He held her tightly
and waited for the pain to subside. Within seconds she was
restless, and bucking against him, wanting him to move with her and
against her. He rocked against her gently at first but she demanded
more and more and he had to fight to keep up. When they climaxed it
was an explosion of pure pleasure and he was sure there were lights
and stars.

He wasn’t sure how long
they lay in each other’s arms trying to catch their breath. He
wasn’t sure who moved first, or if they even moved. He only knew it
was morning before he realised she was gone. He was left with that
empty feeling of loss and failure again. Was she with him last
night because she felt pity for him or did he dream everything so
he could face another day?

It would have been so
easy to get lost in this crowd. So easy for Ash to blend in with
the patients and be forgotten, but the moment Kieran walked into
the department, and his gaze found hers, she knew the only one she
fooled was herself.

She saw him relax and
knew that even from the distance, he was relieved to see that she
was still here. Karl whispered to her and she nodded, taking her
attention away from that dark gaze.

“
We’ve got a
MVA on its way in. Ready?” Kieran’s gaze never left hers as he
addressed them both.

Karl nodded and pulled
her arm following Kieran as he walked towards the main
resuscitation room. “I told you this would be a great experience.
Aren’t you glad you decided to stay for the week?”

She jabbed Karl in the
ribs and hoped Kieran hadn’t heard her colleague. Too late she saw
him flinch but he didn’t stop or turn, he didn’t ask her what Karl
meant, instead he continued walking until they were in front of the
patient.

The paramedic handed
Kieran a chart. “This is Lee, he is twenty-three years old. He was
the driver of a car that crashed into a pole due to this nasty
weather. He has a head injury and some bruises. I’ll leave you to
check him out. We put him in a collar, he was complaining of
cervical pain and he wasn’t wearing his seatbelt.”

Ash stepped aside as the
paramedic pulled off the soiled sheet from his gurney and threw it
in the dirty linen skip as he walked past. Kieran introduced
himself to the patient and then started his head to toe
examination.

“
Karl, you
have a big mouth.” Ash jabbed him in the ribs again.

“
Ouch,” he
touched the spot. “That hurt the first time.”

“
I haven’t
told anyone I was leaving or why.” She stepped forward and watched
as Kieran methodically checked Lee for further injuries.

“
I don’t see
what the big deal is, there is no one else from our group here. I
still don’t understand why you can’t just resit the paper like
everyone else who has failed,” he shrugged.

Ash wished she could. It
would have been so easy if that had been the deal she had made. She
lifted her head and was met with Kieran’s icy gaze.

“
Are you two
paying attention?” he asked.

She nodded feeling all of
six again. He wasn’t happy that she’d left the apartment without
saying goodbye. He was never going to be happy about her having to
leave to go back to marry someone else. Not after last night, but
how could she explain everything to him?

“
What am I
looking for?” He directed the question to her.

Ash had been watching his
every move. She knew that he was looking for further injuries.
“You’re examining him to look for further injuries. He wasn’t
wearing his seatbelt, he might have a fractured skull.”

He nodded and then called
her closer. “I want you to place your hands on either side of his
head.”

Ash looked around the
room, all the nurses and registrars were busy with their tasks and
his choices were limited. “You want me to stabilise his
spine?”

Kieran cocked his head.
Was he impressed? He shouldn’t be. Or at least he wouldn’t be when
he found out that she failed her test and had to go back to her
aunt.

“
Yes, I want
you to place both hands on either side of his head so I can examine
him.” He waited for her to take her place at the head of the table
before continuing, “I don’t want to cause any further damage to his
spine until we can do the x-rays and rule out
fractures.”

Lee tried to turn his
head. “Am I going to be paralysed? Is that why I can’t feel my
legs?”

Ash struggled to keep him
from moving and she turned to Kieran who called for more staff.
“Lee, we don’t know what the damage is right now. You hit the
windscreen with force and you have a lot of facial
injuries.”

Lee’s hand went up and he
tried to get Ash to remove her hands so he could lift himself off
the bed. “I have this tingling sensation in my legs, let me stand
up.”

Ash placed her hands
firmly on his face and tried to focus his attention on her. “Lee,
listen to me. If you try and move, you could cause yourself more
harm. Listen to the doctor. He knows what he is talking about.
Everyone is here to help you.”

He writhed in the bed and
Ash placed her hand on his chest.

“
You don’t
understand,” he said. “I was going out to get diapers for the baby.
My wife is waiting for the diapers. We’d run out and she’s waiting
for me. I had come back from a night shift and―”

Failing a test failed in
comparison to what this man was going through. Her throat closed so
tight that it hurt to move air in and out. She leaned closer to
Lee. “You have to do this for your wife and your child. Let us get
you sorted and then we can call your wife and let her know what’s
happening.”

He stopped moving and
focused on her. “But she’s waiting.”

Ash nodded. “I’ll call
her as soon as I’m done here. If we don’t fix you―”

She knew she didn’t need
to finish her sentence. He nodded and let them finish their
examination.

An hour later she was
nursing a cup of coffee outside the hospital, when she heard that
familiar voice whisper in her ear.

“
I missed you
this morning. I was hoping we’d have coffee together, in bed.” He
came and stood next to her.

Even standing next to him
made her body go into a state of ecstasy. “How would you have
arranged that?”

He leaned over the park
rail and looked out onto the view of the grounds ahead. “I bought
one of those coffee machines.”

Ash watched as an old
couple walked hand in hand towards the bench not far ahead. “A
coffee machine? Why would you do that?”

“
Someone gave
me an addiction to coffee,” he said.

Those were much simpler
times. When she was a waitress or a pretend wife. When she was an
ex-beauty queen and didn’t have any dreams of her own. When she
didn’t want or need anything that she could fail at. “Why did you
come here, to New Zealand? Surely not for the coffee.”

Kieran’s gaze focused on
the couple that were now sitting on the bench. “I think you know
why.”

Ash turned to him and
lifted her chin until she was almost nose-to-nose with him. “So why
me?”

He shook his head. “I
don’t understand. That is not a question. What do you mean, why
you?”

He didn’t know why he
wanted her. He didn’t know her. But how could she expect him to
when she didn’t know herself. Everything inside her hurt but he
couldn’t understand that. It was always so easy for him. “I’m
leaving. I made a promise to go back if things didn’t work out
here.”

He laughed. “What are you
talking about? You are one of the brightest students I have met.
Things are working out perfectly. Promise to whom?”

Ash watched the family
play in the park and she sighed. Life was so much simpler in this
place. Not so rushed, everyone acted and reacted differently. No
wonder Miss Zealand was the way she was. Ash had never understood
that about her then, but now she did.

India was like a
different time zone to this place. The two cities were on two
different lanes of life. One was the fast lane and the other on the
slow lane. What if she’d been born here, what if there was no such
thing as arranged marriage or duty to family?

“
Ash, answer
me? Promise to whom?” he clutched her shoulders and forced her gaze
to meet his.

He was going to find out
either way. She knew this was history doing a turnabout. “My aunt
gave me six months to try and make this dream of mine work. She
helped by financing the trip to come here for a new
start.”

He let her go as if he
knew the rest of the story. “So if this didn’t work, you’re to go
back and pick up where you left off?”

Did he have to make it
sound so dirty? “It’s not as bad as it sounds. She has been very
supportive. She has been there for me all of my life. The only
person who has ever been there for me.”

He shook his head and she
saw his knuckles turn white as he tightened his hold on the rail.
“Really? Have you ever asked yourself what she gets out of
this?”

How dare he suggest that?
“She gets nothing except maybe our family’s reputation
back.”

His raised eyebrow made
her feel uncomfortable. “Tell me you’re not suggesting that Didi is
selling me to the highest bidder?”

His gaze went dark. “I’m
asking you to give me a chance. Don’t go back. Stay with me. We can
make a life together.”

“
You don’t
get it, do you?” How could he not? She cupped her hand at the back
of her neck. “She’s all I have. All I have ever had. Through
everything she’s been there for me and I made her a promise. I have
to keep it. I tried to make this work and it failed. This is my
destiny. It’s written in the stars.”

Kieran’s jaw clamped
down. “You’re kidding me right? Tell me your destiny is not to
spend a lifetime with a man you don’t love? Tell me the stars don’t
have a lifetime of living someone else’s life in store for you?” He
stepped towards her and placed his hands on her arms.

She pulled away from him.
Couldn’t he see how much this hurt? “You know how it works. It’s
our way. We make it work. My mother fought her destiny and look how
well that turned out for her.” She turned away from him. It was
wrong to see all that hurt in his eyes.

“
What about
us? What do the stars say about us? Did we ever stand a chance?” He
waited for her answer.

When she turned to answer
him, he was gone and she was left looking at an empty
space.

*****

“
How is that
mehndi coming along?” Sushi asked as she sat down beside
her.

Ash looked down at the
intricate design on her hands and shrugged. “It’s okay, but it
takes a long time to dry.”

Her aunt’s glance was
caustic. “Ash, this wedding is going to be the best New Delhi has
seen in a long time, the least you can do is appreciate the effort
I am making.”

She did appreciate the
effort, but she would have been happy getting married in a sack at
the local temple. Not that Alok would have noticed. “Are you sure
you told Alok I don’t want to wear all that jewellery?”

Another malignant look
and Ash was forced to leave well enough alone. The wedding was
beginning to be more of a gala event then a simple wedding and she
was sure that even Alok would not want this much attention on his
special day. Her aunt was out of control and unfortunately she was
using the excuse of this being the only wedding she would be
planning to spin out of control.

“
Ash, there
are several saris and outfits that have arrived. I have chosen a
few select designs that will suit you. You can see if you like
these,” her aunt pointed to the end of the room.