Angel Star (22 page)

Unbelievable
.

I had spent the whole day in flux. Waiting. Searching. He hadn’t shown up for school today, and on several occasions throughout the day I couldn’t decide if I wanted to cry or scream because of it. I unlocked the car, slid inside, and reached up to the rearview mirror. I couldn’t hold back my smile.

The blue topaz rosary hung from my mirror, and inside one of the chains was a tiny scroll of paper. It would have taken me hours to get it rolled as tightly as it was. Very carefully, I unrolled the stationery that was as thin as rice paper and Garreth’s absence was instantly forgiven. His amazing scent also unfurled from the delicate paper, filling my car like an embrace, and tears welled up in my eyes. Only a few hours on my own and it hit me how desperately I missed him.

How am I going to cope when he leaves me forever?

I wiped my eyes, worrying I would stain the paper with my tears and his message would be ruined.

I missed you too.

Your surprise awaits you…

I figured it was about time your boyfriend took you on a date. Ready by 6 o’clock.

G.

My hand trembled. Before I realized it, I had read the note at least ten times. I turned the key in the ignition and the little car sprang to life, its engine humming joyously along with my heart. Together we drove home to get ready for my date.

“S
top pacing. You’re wearing a path in the wood and it’s not in the budget to refurbish the floors,” my mom called out from the living room.

“Sorry!” I yelled as I peeked out the window for the thousandth time. “He’s here! See ya!”

“Just hold on a second. If he’s a gentleman, he’ll come to the door.” My mother walked into the hallway, curious to see if Garreth would pass her test of chivalry.

I rolled my eyes, my impatience to be alone with him getting the best of me. And now my mom expected me to play along with her.

“Mom, we’re not going to the prom, you know. It’s just a date. No big deal.”

“If it isn’t a big deal, then how come you’ve been wearing a hole in the floor for the last half hour?” Her smile rubbed it in that she had won this match, and I was left waiting to hear his footsteps on the porch.

My hand flicked out for the doorknob like a streak of lightning as I gritted my teeth and begged with my eyes for my mother to disappear into the other room.

“Fine, fine, I’ll stop hovering. Have a good time.” She planted a kiss on my head and walked back into the living room.

Finally, I swung open the door and there stood an absolutely incredible-looking being in a black leather jacket and dark jeans. My eyes drank him in, traveling from his feet upward. I quickly shouted good-bye to my mom and pulled the door closed behind me.

I stopped short.

I was staring into the beautiful face of my date.

I was staring into the face of Hadrian.

I couldn’t speak.

“You look nice.” Hadrian smiled crookedly, making light of the shock he had just given me.

I didn’t answer, wanting to run back into the house, into the safety net of my living room where my mother was glued to the evening news between commercial flips to the QVC channel. Of course, that posed a problem. How would I explain to my mother who Hadrian was.
What
he was?

The hairs on my arms rose and tingled in the evening breeze. I couldn’t believe my eyes
.

Hadrian?

“How? Why…?” I tripped over my words.

When nothing else came out, I simply clamped my mouth shut and stared at him. The familiar trickle of fear pooled deep within me, but even more disturbing was the fact that I felt this need to stay. And it was much stronger than the need to hear why he had come back,
how
he had come back. This was
desire.

“I understand. You’re a bit surprised to see me.” He inched his way forward and I felt my own feet move closer in response. I was powerless to stop them.

He looked different tonight. Handsome beyond explanation. Dangerous. But different. And I had no idea why. He held out his hand to me, and as if under a spell, I placed mine in his. The touch of our skin sent my blood screaming through my veins. My house, my street, my neighborhood seemed to melt away and the air felt perilous and enticing.

Hadrian led me off the porch and down the steps to the street below.

“Are we walking somewhere?” I asked.

From his pocket he produced a small black key chain and I heard the familiar click of a car unlocking. I stared at the shiny black Jaguar parked across from us and then turned to look at his face.

“Rides like hot glass,” he answered, his laugh melting into the night, along with everything else.

I truly believed my sanity, at that point, was among the missing.

His eyes were shining like the glossy wax job on the intimidating vehicle we were approaching. He opened my door, like a gentleman, then shut it and walked around to his side while I quietly looked across the street, staring blankly at the house that was mine.

Wordlessly, we took off into the night. I had no idea where we were going or what to expect. This was one “surprise” I had never anticipated.

Finally, I couldn’t stand it any longer. I shifted in my seat to face him. “Where are we going?” I asked with as much authority as I could muster.

I watched his profile light up with the passing of each streetlight. This all felt oddly familiar to me.

“You got my note, right?” He smiled at me, finally tearing his eyes away from the road ahead of us.

“
Your
note?”

“Well, don’t you like surprises?” His eyes grew wide with animation. “My dear, it was only fitting that you would assume the note was from your
Guardian
. I found it pertinent to exclude the actual source.”

My insides twisted anxiously. The note hadn’t been from Garreth.

It sank in then that I was in a moving car with an angel intent on destruction, and my Guardian never showed up at school today,
or
after school for that matter.

I was a freaking idiot.

I sat numbly, staring straight ahead, trying to figure out where we were going so I could find a way out of this mess I had foolishly gotten myself into.

No, scratch that. How
stupidly
I hadgotten myself into this.

With each tree and each sign that passed my window a familiar, uncomfortable feeling tortured me. Something was seriously wrong here. My heart began pounding, I was sure he could hear it. It echoed in my chest and my ears. I looked out the window but it had become so dark suddenly that all I could see was my own worried reflection. I looked down at my lap where my hands rested quietly, aching terribly for Garreth’s.

Perhaps if I…

I slid my left hand over and placed it on top of his, forcing him to abandon the wheel. His dark eyes gleamed with surprise and he took my hand firmly, sending a dark tremor through me.

His hand was like ice.

“Your hand’s freezing.” It was the first thing out of my mouth. My heart’s heavy thumping was nearly uncontrollable now.

I reached out to crank up the heat, seeking normalcy in the situation but got confusion instead as I stared at all the buttons and dials. As foreign as this car and its controls were to me, the complexity of the dashboard wasn’t. Now that I was staring more intently at it, it reminded me of the stereo in Claire’s… I mean,
my
car.

My emotions were a gnarled mess. I was afraid of where I was, that I was with Hadrian, of what had become of Garreth, what was to become of me… Yet, through it all, an unfamiliar part of me wanted to stay. I
had
to stay.

There was no hiding the hesitancy in my voice. “Wow, what a system. So this is why these cars are so expensive.” Perhaps if I tried to act in a normal way, I could get myself out of this.

“Actually, it came with a different one, but I switched it out,” he answered.

“You
switched
it? Why?”

“Does that matter? It wasn’t what I wanted.”

I looked at him long and hard for a moment.

“What? Don’t you like the stereo?” Hadrian asked, playing along with my little game.

“It’s um…” What was the word I was looking for? “It’s a bit…ostentatious.”

“That’s how I like things. Ostentatious.” His smooth, cold hand gestured to the electronic monstrosity.

The car slowed to a stop and I saw we were parked on a barren stretch of road alongside thick woods. Hadrian turned to me and light from the dashboard splashed across his face so that only the deep intensity of his eyes was visible to me.

“Haven’t you ever wanted something
else
? Something that perhaps isn’t quite up to your standards, something you can bend and shape into what you want?” He leaned closer now. Close enough that I could smell him.

He smelled of something dangerous, something strong that mixed with earth and pine, as if the line of trees next to us were growing right alongside us in the car.

“We’re not talking about the stereo anymore, are we?” I whispered, shivering beneath his stare.

I felt my insides turn to jelly; my limbs had forged with the black leather seat beneath me and refused to move. The car, the road, the trees no longer existed, only his unfathomable eyes fixed on mine. I felt him breathing me in, and without any regard I leaned in closer to him, unable to stop myself.

“
You’re
what
I
want, Teagan.” I felt the strength of his whisper beneath my skin. “You tip the scales when I’m with you. All I thought I wanted means nothing now that I know you exist.” His breath was on my neck, his lips devouring my skin.

I heard something tapping against the roof of the car. It was raining. A streak of white flashed across my eyelids, which were uncontrollably fluttering. Lightning. A second streak invaded the dark, making me open my eyes as he grabbed my wrist. The light flashed across his eyes, blacker than the night and shining with conviction. He was just as mesmerizing as the moment I first laid eyes on him, but I was quickly recovering.

“No!” I pulled away but he held tight. With fear, I realized part of me wanted to stay and my wanting him repulsed me. “You’re dead!”

“I’m very real, thanks to you.”

“But I killed you.”

“Transformed would be more appropriate. You cannot kill a Guardian, merely alter one.”

I shook my head. This couldn’t be. It just couldn’t be. Reality was hitting hard. I needed to get out of there, but Hadrian’s firm hand anchored me.

“Before you judge me, please listen to me.”

I trembled, inches away from my greatest enemy, as the darkness from beyond the window softly crept into my head. I was dizzy, woozy, and I had no choice but to stay.

I
woke up as if from a vivid nightmare. I was lying on the floor, watching streaks of light play and mingle with the colored triangles of stained glass. I rolled over. Hadrian was lighting a red candle, his back turned to me. I could hear rain falling steadily outside the chapel but it did not fall through the open roof above me. I looked up into the dark, waiting to be splashed in the face. I remembered the tower that once stood there, stretching high into the sky, the tower Hadrian and I had floated up into…floating…spiraling… I closed my eyes for a second, seeing two faces: Hadrian’s and Garreth’s. The spinning sensation came back to me, dizzying me. I sighed in agreement. My life was spiraling out of control.

“You’re supposed to dead.” My chest rattled with the breath I drew in too quickly.

Hadrian turned immediately at the sound of my voice and walked over to me, slowly, stopping just before I would feel he was too close.

“Haven’t you learned that death is a beginning? Besides, I already told you, you can’t kill what isn’t human.” He crouched down and gently took my hand, opening it to reveal my palm. “You have this power, and still you are unclear as to what it means.”

He was so different now, not as menacing as in the car. But, of course, my own fear played a large role in how he appeared to me. He spoke with tenderness and his eyes were full of warmth, though something lingered there…misunderstanding and hurt and I felt too tired to fight or even fear him. My hand was open in front of me, my mark displayed. The etching had become deeper and more pronounced. Daily, it was becoming a permanent part of me.

“I have known you your entire life, Teagan.” He gently traced the outline of my mark with his finger. “Close your eyes and you can make it disappear.”

“I can’t do that! You just want me to get rid of it so I’m powerless against…”

“Just try it.
You
control your mark.”

He was smiling at me and I had no choice but to try it. I squeezed my hand shut and then opened it. It was gone! I opened and closed my hand over and over but it was truly gone.

I looked up at Hadrian, anger surfacing. “I want it back.”

“Then wish it so.”

I expected him to fight me on this, saying it was too late and gone for good. It confused me that perhaps he was simply giving me a lesson. With all my heart I wished for it, and as soon as I opened my hand, it was there again. Relief swept through me. I wanted to cry.

My heart was pounding. “I don’t understand.”

“You have the power to make things happen.” He took my chin in his hand and tilted it up toward the light of the candles. “My feet have worn a path I no longer wish to follow, but that path cannot be erased and I will forever pay for my actions. You sliced the octagram in half, dividing me. For the longest time, I couldn’t see who I was because something else was always covering it, and I, too, feared what I couldn’t see. You broke that in me. Don’t you see, Teagan? That is your power. You are the key to truth. The truth of what is in each and every one of us.”

His expression was so serious and genuine. Did he truly want to reform? Was that why I felt drawn to him, because I could see what good was left in him? Could I help repair him somehow?