An Ex to Grind in Deadwood (Deadwood Humorous Mystery Book 5) Paperback – September 4, 2014 (13 page)

Ben sprang to his feet and had a glass ready for me after I fell into my chair.

“If you’ll give Violet a minute, Mr. Conner,” Mona said to Rex, “she’ll be right with you.”
Won’t you?
Mona mouthed when her back was to Rex.

I nodded slightly. It was about all I could manage at the moment. My brain seemed to have crashed and needed a few heartbeats to reboot.

“No problem,” Rex said, checking his watch. “I don’t need to be at work for another hour.”

Work? Where in the hell was he working? Here? In Deadwood?

Ray walked over to stand next to Rex, his smirk for me only. “As I said yesterday, Mr. Conner, I can help you. Just let me know what you’re in the market for.”

Rex patted Ray on the shoulder like they were old chums. Old
chum
was more like it—rotten, stinking, fish head chum. I’d love to take both of them out to sea and dump them overboard for the sharks to eat.

“Thanks,” Rex said, “but I’m here for Miss Parker.”

Here for what, though? If it had anything to do with the two children I had raised without him, I might end up seeing Detective Cooper today from behind bars.

Schooling my face, I finished the glass of water Ben had brought and took a deep breath. Nobody at Calamity Jane Realty knew that I had a history with Rex and I needed to keep it that way. He’d signed away all rights to his children almost a decade ago, and until I figured out what his angle was for showing up at my job and surprising the life out of me, I needed to play it safe.

“Sorry about that, Mr. Conner,” I said, crisp but pleasant. “I’ve been having some problems with an inner ear issue and it causes vertigo at the most inconvenient times.”

One of Rex’s dark blonde eyebrows crept up. “That sounds uncomfortable, Miss Parker. I hope you have that looked at by a qualified physician before it becomes more of a problem.”

Go fuck a duck, asshole.

My phone started ringing. I hit the forward button, expecting the call to transfer to Mona. Instead I heard the phone ring in Jerry’s office. Jerry must have changed the forwarding setup.

Back to the problem at hand—Rex.

Well aware of the audience that sat circled around us listening to every word Rex and I spoke, I indicated the chair opposite my desk. “Why don’t you have a seat and we can discuss exactly what you’re looking for in detail.”

And why you dared to step back into my breathing space.

While he lowered into the chair, I grabbed the small framed picture of Addy and Layne bookending Aunt Zoe and stuffed it into my middle desk drawer. No way in hell did Rex get to even peek at what he’d happily walked away from almost a decade ago.

“Would you like something to drink?” I envisioned dumping a freshly brewed carafe of coffee over the son of a bitch’s head.

“No, thank you. I’m fine.”

I clasped my hands together in front of me to keep them from throwing something at him of their own free will. My smile felt three sizes too tight, but I forced my cheeks to wear it anyway. I locked gazes with him and held my ground.

What in the hell are you doing in Deadwood?
I wanted to scream, but instead asked, “How can I help you?”

Rex’s focus drifted down to the neckline of my silk shirt. “I’m interested in seeing what you have available.”

Absolutely, positively nothing for him except for my foot, which I’d be happy to plant in his ass on the way out of the door and my life.

“To rent or own?” I asked.

“That depends on how things pan out.”

I could show him how they’d “pan out.” I just needed a cast iron skillet for demonstration purposes.

Mona’s fingernails returned to her keys, her interest in Rex Conner and me apparently over. Good. One down, two to go. I could see Ray over Rex’s shoulder, leaning back in his chair, openly watching me. A glance Ben’s way caught him staring at Rex, small vertical wrinkles dividing his eyebrows.

“Well, we could start with rentals. If none of them work for you,”
you could leave the damned state,
“we can revisit your plans for staying in town.”

Rex’s smile widened, obviously catching my hint. That was unfortunate; I rather liked the idea of beating it into him. “I’ll leave it in your talented hands then.”

Talented hands, huh? A memory flashed of the things he used to like me to do with my hands and bile rose in my throat. “One bedroom or two?”

“Two preferably. I prefer a separate room for my office.”

Ben stood and grabbed his keys. “I’ll be back in a half hour,” he told Ray, who nodded while continuing to watch the Rex and Violet show. Being the rat he was, he must have picked up the scent of Rex’s rotten personality and felt like bonding with him.

“I don’t like to take my work to bed,” Rex added with a wink.

Right. I remembered. He preferred to bed long-legged skanks who were bent on screwing their older sisters’ boyfriends to uphold their psychotic vendettas.

I flipped open the available rentals report Ben had printed out yesterday.

Across the room, Ray snickered at me. I aimed a pointed look over Rex’s shoulder at the horse’s ass, pretty certain Ray’s shit eating grin was based on the fact that I’d taken my work to bed—as in Doc.

“Ray,” Mona interrupted our showdown before we had a chance to clear leather. “Did you ever send me that information I needed on the Elks’ Lodge in Deadwood?”

“It’s in my SUV.”

“Could you go get it, please.” It was more of an order than a question.

Ray shot her a frown. “You need it right now?”

Mona lowered her reading glasses. “I needed it two days ago when I asked you for it,” she said as sweet as cherry pie, but her glare was loaded with tartness.

With a grunt, Ray followed in Ben’s wake.

Thank you, Mona.

Focusing back on the problem sitting in front of me, I skimmed my finger down the page of rentals available in the area, passing over three that fit his bill. “Hmmm. It appears there aren’t any two bedroom rentals available.”

“Nothing?” Rex raised one eyebrow. “Really?” His voice was full of disbelief.

Mona’s typing slowed, her face turning in my direction. I avoided what I was sure was a questioning look from her. She studied the listings every day and could usually rattle off how many two, three, and four bedroom places were available in a fifty mile radius.

I stared hard at Rex. “Really.”
Now leave.

Mona cleared her throat.

Without looking at her, I held up my index finger in her direction.

Rex rubbed his chin, tipping his head to the side. “That’s a bit of a surprise.”

“Yes, it is.” I leaned back, smiling wide, baring my sharp teeth. “Today seems to be full of them.”

“How about houses for sale then?”

“Nothing there either,” I said without even a glance at the reports in front of me.

Rex’s eyes narrowed. “Deadwood must be a popular place to live.”

“We’re mired in a seller’s market at the moment.”

Mona stopped clacking altogether.

“Violet,” Jerry called, stepping out of his office and breaking the tension hovering between Rex and me, “I have a mess …” He looked up from the newspaper he was carrying and noticed I had company. “Oh, I’m sorry to interrupt. Please continue. I’ll catch you later.”

Unfortunately, instead of returning to his office, Jerry headed for the coffee maker.

“What do you suggest then, Miss Parker?” Rex asked.

Shit! I could sidetrack Mona for now and make up a reason I had blown off Rex later, but with Jerry listening in, I was at a disadvantage.

“Why don’t you let me do some more research and give you a call …”
never ever EVER
“… later.”

Jerry strolled towards us, fresh coffee in hand. “Hello,” he said to Rex. “I’m Jerry Russo.” He held out his hand.

Rex stood and took Jerry up on his handshake. “Rex Conner, nice to meet you.”

“I hear you saw Violet’s billboard ad.”

“I did.” Rex’s eyes practically sparkled when they settled back on me. “It snagged my attention immediately.”

I bet it did. I wonder what other old enemies of mine would be surfacing now that they knew where to find me.

Jerry patted my shoulder. “She’s a great Realtor, really knows this area well.”

That wasn’t quite true. While I’d been coming here in the summer to stay with Aunt Zoe since I was a kid, I’d only lived here full time since March.

“Too bad there isn’t much available around here,” Rex said. “I was really looking forward to checking out some places and settling in for a while.”

“Isn’t much available?” Jerry looked down at me, his forehead all crunched. “Didn’t Ben print out reports for today?”

I sighed. “He was working on that when he had to step out.”

As Jerry strode to the printer, Rex gave me a white-toothed victory grin. Oh, how I wished I carried a battering ram in my purse.

“Here we are,” Jerry said, rejoining us, oblivious of the tension crackling out from my head like bolts of electricity.

Ray came stomping down the back hallway. He dropped a folder on Mona’s desk. “There you go, Red.” He eyed Jerry and then Rex and then me, his suspicion plain as mud on his face.

“Thanks,” I said when Jerry handed me today’s report on rentals. I glanced down at the paper. “Well, would you look at that. It’s your lucky day, Mr. Conner.”

“I was thinking just that when I woke up this morning,” Rex said, oozing charm again.

I longed to dump him and all of that smarmy charm over Pactola Dam.

“Would you like me to write down the addresses so that you can take a look at the places available?” I offered.

Jerry shot me a quick frown. “Or Violet could show them to you personally.”

No, Violet does not want to do that, thank you, Coach Jerry.

“I’d like that,” Rex said to Jerry. He turned to me. “Are you available tomorrow afternoon?”

No! Not even for a minute. Nothing available for all eternity either.

“I’m sure she is.”

If Jerry didn’t stop answering for me, I was going to climb up on my desk and leap onto his back, pummeling him until he whimpered like a spanked puppy.

“Excellent.” Rex pulled a set of car keys from his pocket. “Will two o’clock work, Miss Parker?”

I nodded, not trusting my mouth enough to open it in case a ball of fire spewed forth and burned Rex to a crisp right before my boss’s eyes.

“It’s a date then,” Jerry said, clapping his huge hands together.

I jerked at the sound. “An
appointment
,” I corrected with a brittle imitation of a smile. “I’ll drive,” I told Rex. There was no way I was crawling in a vehicle with him unless I had the upper hand.

“Perfect.” Rex shook Jerry’s hand again, then held his palm out for me to take.

When I hesitated, Jerry nudged me toward Rex. “I’ll see you then,” I said, letting Rex’s hand touch mine.

It was all I could do not to recoil from his firm warm grip. As soon as he left, I was going to race to the bathroom and scald my skin under steaming hot water.

With a nod farewell, Rex strode out the front door.

“Are you feeling okay, Violet?” Jerry asked after the turd had left.

Not even a miniscule bit.
“I’m fine.” I grabbed my purse from my drawer. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to run to the restroom for a moment.”

“Sure, yeah.” He stepped aside, letting me pass. “Oh, when you’re finished, you need to call Detective Cooper.”

That stopped me. Cooper must have been the one who was calling when Rex first showed up. I turned back, wondering what Jerry knew about my appointment with Cooper at the Galena House today. “Did he give a reason for the call?”

“Yes. He told me to let you know he’d like to take you for lunch as a thank you for all of the hard work you’ve been doing to get his house sold.”

I glanced beyond Jerry out the front window to make sure there were no pigs flying around outside.

“How kind of him,” I said, wondering what in the hell the detective was up to with this ploy.

“You’re doing a great job for the team, Violet,” Jerry said.

His compliment made me sputter in surprise. Lately, I’d felt like I kept fouling out. “Thanks.”

Turning on my boot heel, I escaped to the bathroom. Once there, I stared at the red-cheeked woman in the mirror, surprised to find that my mouth wasn’t frothing yet.

Rex Conner.

In the flesh.

Interested in acquiring a house in Deadwood.

I gripped the edge of the sink. How was I going to keep the truth about who he was from my kids? Where was that paper he’d signed that stated he agreed to give up all rights to his children? I knew my father’s lawyer had a copy stored away somewhere, but I was sure I’d hidden my copy in one of the boxes stored down in Aunt Zoe’s basement. Or had I left it at my parents’ place in case Addy or Layne started snooping through my stuff?

Fuck! Shit! Damn!

I scrubbed both of my hands down my face, and then splashed cold water on my hot cheeks.

What was I going to do? I wanted to call Doc and spill my troubles all over him, but I had no idea how the news about Rex looking me up would go over. Not that Doc was the jealous type, but we were still so new in our coupledom that this news might cause problems I didn’t realize were even a possibility. We had enough working against us already with all of Doc’s freaky ghosts, my pissy kids, and now Tiffany Psycho-bell. Would knowing the father of my children was skulking around me scare Doc off?

God, why did Rex have to show up now? I patted my skin dry and then checked my cell phone. Detective Cooper had left me a message, too. He was quite attentive this morning. Wasn’t I the lucky girl?

I pulled up Natalie’s number. Her phone rang six times before forwarding to her voicemail. I hung up, wishing she weren’t so damned far away. I needed her now more than ever. She was the only one who knew how dangerous Rex being back in town was to my family.

Tossing the paper towel in the trash, I blew out a breath.

Cooper had better be on his best behavior today. Because after facing down Rex this morning, I wanted nothing more than to bite someone’s head clean off. The detective’s thick skull would do fine.