An Act of Redemption (11 page)

I stop and finally look at him. “No, I’m pissed off that you didn’t fucking tell me. I could have at least been prepared. I wasn’t expecting to go back and see them like that. I expected everything to be the same, if not worse!”

“And you’re mad that it’s not?” he asks, his tone incredulous. I don’t blame him for being confused; even I don’t understand what the fuck I’m feeling.

“No, I just…fuck!” I run my hands through my hair, trying to find the right words. “I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m trying to say.” I take a moment to collect my thoughts. “Look, I appreciate what you did, especially for my sister’s sake. But if you want the truth, I don’t fucking like that you saw my life for what it was. I don’t like that I feel indebted to you, and even more so I fucking hate that she changed with your help but not mine.” I lean against the wall with my head down, hating that I just admitted that to him but it’s the truth. I think that’s what pisses me off the most. How many times did I try to get her into rehab only to have her refuse? Sure I couldn’t afford where Jaxson probably sent her but she wouldn’t even consider the idea.

“Do you really think your home life skewed my perception in some way?” he asks. “You have no fucking clue where I come from. I’m not saying your life was sunshine and rainbows but believe me when I say I come from my own hell. Your mom fucked up and she knows it, but she didn’t change for me, she changed for you. I just helped get her there. As for your debt, you owe me shit. I didn’t just do it for you, I did it for Anna.” My head snaps up at the mention of her, the sound of her name burning like salt to an open wound. Jaxson leans against the wall next to me, matching my stance. “I did whatever she asked for. I did anything and everything I could to help her stop hurting so much. She was fucked up for a long time when you sent her away like that.”

The image of her that day at the prison flashes through my mind and I grind my teeth against the memory. “Are you saying that I did the wrong thing?”

He shakes his head. “Not at all. I think you did the right thing. I would have done the same. Actually, I did something similar with Julia and it was hard, but I stand behind my decision. Sometimes doing the right thing fucking sucks.”

He’s got that right.

“Well whatever your reasons were for helping, thank you. I’m glad to know my sister wasn’t suffering the entire time I was gone.”

We both don’t miss the fact that I leave my mom out of the equation, but thankfully he lets it go. “You’re welcome. Now about Anna showing up at the fight.”

I hold my hand up to ward off whatever he’s about to say. “Look, it wasn’t my place to tell you and I figured she would eventually. But I will say that she is not ever stepping foot in that place again.”

“Damn straight. I told her the same thing.”

I grunt. “Well hopefully she took it from you better than she did me.”

He shrugs. “Probably the same, but she did agree that she wouldn’t go back. Apparently it was her first time, all I care about is that it’s her last.” I nod, agreeing with him. “Listen, why don’t you go shower and we’ll call it a day. We can start fresh tomorrow. I want to hit it hard over the next week before the fight. I’ve talked to someone I know in the industry and he’s agreed to come in and help.”

“Who?”

“Kolan Slade,” he says the name as if I should know who that is. “Right, I guess you wouldn’t know. He’s Katelyn’s brother, and one of the best MMA fighters in the industry right now.”

“Why do you feel like we need him?”

“Because he will be able to offer you pointers that we can’t. We’re trained in combative and him MMA; together we should be able to make you unbeatable. Ricketts postponing shit is making me nervous, and I want to make sure you come out on top.”

“I can handle him,” I reply confidently, before pushing off the wall and heading to the locker room.

“Don’t get too cocky, no one is invincible,” he shouts to my retreating back.

“Except me!” Sawyer bellows from across the gym, clearly eavesdropping.

Shaking my head I hit the shower, appreciating that the stalls are separate or I wouldn’t fucking have one here. I stand under the hot spray for longer than usual, the heat feeling good on my tight muscles.

After I finish and start changing I hear the most beautiful laugh erupt from the gym, the familiar sound washing over me and making my chest pull tight. “Sawyer, put me down or I’ll have Bandit sic you.” Anna threatens with a giggle.

Shit! I’m not ready to see her again. Oh what the hell am I saying? I fucking crave to see her, but every time I do it ends badly, and I hate causing her pain.

I finish pulling on my shirt then take a deep breath before walking out into the gym. Like always, my first glance of her hits me like a blow to the chest and sucks the oxygen right out of my lungs.

Jesus, she is fucking beautiful.

Her soft yellow tank top and jean shorts compliment her warm skin tone and tight, lithe body. A body that I’ve missed almost as much as the girl herself.

As if feeling the weight of my stare she looks up and her gaze collides with mine. Her soft brown eyes flare with surprise and something else, something that I can’t decipher. I break eye contact first, not wanting to see the pain and anger I know is to come, then head over to the ring and grab my stuff. As I’m shoving my shit into my bag I feel a soft finger trail down my arm. I look over and have to bite back a curse.
Shit.
This chick does not give up. Lindsay is her name, I think. No wait, Lana. No…Lauren? Oh who gives a fuck—the bitch is relentless.

“Hey, Logan.”

I want to cringe at her whiney voice but manage to hold back. “Hey.”

“What are you doing right now?”

“Heading home.”

“Want some company?” She tries to sound seductive but it comes out annoying and grates on my nerves.

“Nope.”

I feel her tense next to me but I don’t bother to look up. “Well maybe I could leave my number in case you change—”

“I’m not interested.”
Just like the last four fucking times.

With a huff I hear her walk away or at least I thought so, but when I feel a hand on my arm again a moment later I fucking snap and turn on her. “Look, I said to fuck…” I trail off when I look into the face of an angel, the same one that haunts my dreams every night.

“Sorry,” Anna apologizes softly, releasing my arm.

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was you.”

“It’s okay.” I wait for her to say something, bracing myself for a confrontation. “So I was wondering if maybe you wanted to…um, well…” She releases a frustrated breath at her stammering and shakes her head. “Did you want to come with me to Grace’s pie bakery down the street to…talk?” Her offer renders me speechless and she takes it the wrong way. “Yeah, okay, never mind. Forget I asked.” She turns to walk away but I grab her arm before she can escape and it’s like a bolt of fucking electricity straight to my system. I can tell she feels it too, if her slight gasp is anything to go by. She glances down at where I touch her but I don’t let go.

“Yeah, Anna, I’ll go with you.” I’d fucking go anywhere with her.

“Okay, let me just say goodbye.”

With a nod I step back and watch as she goes to retrieve her purse, my eyes glued to her incredible ass. When I finally pull my gaze away, I look up to see Jaxson glaring at me like he’s about to take me out. It’s a glare that I remember well, but I don’t let it deter me and shrug unapologetically.

Anna walks over to him and wraps her arms around his waist. That sight used to really piss me off when we were first together. Actually, their entire relationship bothered me. She’s always had a hero worship thing for him. Don’t get me wrong, I was glad the guy was there for her, I just hated that someone else was that for her because I wanted to be the only one she turned to. But then I pulled my head out of my ass and accepted their relationship for what it was, and I’m glad she has him. Especially since I ended up fucking up and couldn’t be there for her anyway.

I’m pulled from my thoughts as she walks over to me, and I realize I’ve been staring at her like an idiot. “You ready?”

“Yeah.” I decide to leave my bag for now and gesture for her to go first.

Just as we make it to the door Sarge calls out to her. “Hey, Anna girl, bring some pie back for Bandit and me, will ya? Just tell that sweet woman to put it on this guy’s tab,” he says, pointing to Sawyer.

“That dog is not eating any fucking pie while under this roof,” Jaxson says.

“Why the hell not?”

“Because he will have the shits and that is the last fucking thing I want in my gym.”

Sarge’s argument gets cut off when Anna opens the door with a giggle and walks out. I follow suit, getting a whiff of her incredible scent from the slight breeze in the air and it instantly turns my dick hard. Silence settles between us as we walk side by side. I get the familiar urge to grab her hand or touch her in some way, so I reach into my pocket and pull out my smokes in an effort to keep my hands busy. I light one up, hoping to take some of this edge off.

“When did you start that up again?” She tries to keep her tone light but I can detect her disapproval. I quit the first time for her because she fucking hated it, said she didn’t want me to die.

“Four years ago.” It was pretty much the one luxury I could have and it helped ease the tension that constantly coiled inside of me while being locked up in that fucking place. It gave me a small sense of choice and freedom that I no longer had. I glance over to see her nod but can tell it bothers her just as much now as it did before. Taking one more pull, I toss it to the ground and under my boot.

“You didn’t have to do that,” she mumbles softly.

Instead of responding I decide to change the topic. “So what’s with Sarge?”

“What do you mean?”

I shrug. “I recognized him from that night when you walked out of the shelter. When I asked Jaxson where he came from he gave me some vague shit about the things he does for you.”

A smile graces her face. “I met him when I first started volunteering at St. Mary’s and we clicked right away. I was pretty much the only one whose head he didn’t bite off. He’s a kind man but he can be grumpy at times,” she explains with affection but her easy demeanor slips with what she says next. “He’s a former Marine, and his story of how he ended up here is heartbreaking. I came out the other night to see him in the rain because the shelter was full. I just couldn’t leave him like that, and since I can’t have him in the dorm I called Jaxson.” Her smile returns and so does that hero worship. “It sounds like it’s going all right, minus the obvious differences about Bandit,” she says with a chuckle.

“Yeah, it seems like he fits in with them. He’s quite the character. He was trying to be my manager today.”

“Manager?”

“Yep, he thinks I’m a machine and that after this is over I can make us loads of money. His words not mine,” I add with a smirk.

“After what is over exactly?” she whispers, making me realize my mistake too late. She immediately cuts a hand through the air. “Never mind, sorry I asked. I’ve already been informed that you can’t talk about it.” Her tone is light but I can sense her frustration.

I don’t want her to know. I don’t want her caught up in any of this shit. “You’re right, I can’t talk about it, but I’m sure you have a good idea what I’m doing and who I’m doing it for since I’m out early.”

She looks up at me with even more questions burning in her gaze, but thankfully I don’t have to elaborate because we make it to the bakery just in the knick of time. A pink, little, Victorian-styled shop with white trim that’s called
A Slice Of Hope With A Sprinkle of Grace.

We walk in to see it’s quite busy and I’m not surprised. I’ve had the pleasure of eating Grace’s pies many times before at the gatherings Anna was invited to. They are the best this world has to offer.

“Anna, Anna, Anna.” A little girl squeals as she runs over to us and jumps into Anna’s waiting arms. By her blonde hair and bright green eyes I have no doubt that this is Sawyer and Grace’s daughter.

“Well hey there, little Miss Hope, are you helpin’ Mama out today?”

“I sure am. Parker and Beckett are havin’ a play date so Mama said I could be her helper for the day. We made Daddy a special pie called Daddy Love Pie, we’re gonna surpwise him with it tonight after supper.”

“Well I’ll bet it’s delicious and we both know your Daddy will try to eat it all without sharing.”

“Pwobably.” She giggles but it trails off when she looks over at me. Curiosity sparks in her eyes.

Anna quickly introduces us. “Hope, this is Logan. Logan, this sweet little thing is Hope Evans.”

“Hi, Hope, it’s nice to meet you.”

“Hi.” She waves with a shy smile.

“Oh, Anna, what a pleasant surprise,” Grace says, walking out of the back. She slightly falters when she sees me but recovers quickly. After giving Anna a hug she turns and pulls me in for one, too. “Logan, it’s so good to see you.”

I tense without meaning to, uncomfortable with her affection, but I pat her back awkwardly, not wanting to be an asshole. “Thanks, Grace, you, too.”

“Why don’t y’all go take a seat at the far back table while Hope and I get you guys some drinks.”

“Sounds good.” Anna puts Hope back to her feet and I quickly notice that the little girl is dressed exactly like her mom, wearing a yellow ’50s-styled uniform with a little white apron. She even has her name embroidered on the top left of her chest. Other than Sawyer’s green eyes she looks exactly like Grace.

Both Anna and I order a soda then go to take a seat at the only table in the back. Anna ends up sitting in the chair that’s against the wall, which means I will have to sit with my back to the entire place. The thought has my stomach churning and my heart racing. “Would you mind if we switched seats?”

She’s caught off guard by my request but quickly obliges. “Sure.”

I take the seat and breathe a little easier at feeling the wall against my back. Anna watches me with an assessing gaze and I fucking hate it.

Thankfully, we are interrupted before she can think too much about it. “Here are your sodas.” Hope holds one cup in both of her tiny hands while Grace carries the other. I get the glass that Hope had, which has sticky liquid dripping all down the side of it, but Grace is there to quickly wipe it off.