Read Alpha Doms Box Set: 9 Delicious Stories + 10 Sexy Heroes = 19 Reasons to Indulge Online
Authors: Christin Lovell
Tags: #werewolf, #werewolves, #menage, #erotic romance, #gay erotica, #bbw, #mm, #mf, #plus size heroine
Jayson was gorgeous, everything a woman
could want in a man. He stood just over six feet with spiked light
brown hair that was always styled to messy perfection. His brown
eyes were deep, rich pools of lusciousness. The striations of
honey, chocolate and bark were everything a female were loved. The
cuts and angles of his body were sharp; deep grooves defined every
muscle. His tan complexion reminded me of sun-filled days by the
river; it was sun kissed beauty, just like him.
He struck my ass again. My flesh was already
beginning to numb where he’d made his presence known on me.
When I remained silent for another thirty
seconds, his hand whacked my flesh, which I was certain was red by
now.
I fought back the tears threatening to slip
over the rims of my eyes. I closed my eyes, trying to channel my
place of serenity. I needed Mother Nature’s whispering strength; I
needed her fortitude.
Another slap resounded through the space as
the ache immediately mellowed.
In the back of my mind, I knew if I would
just let go, that I could probably enjoy being tied up by the man
I’d yearned for for four years straight. But I couldn’t let go. I
wasn’t ready to let go. I suppose the greatest awareness I had was
that, if I did let go, he would know the worst of me. He would know
all my dirty thoughts and secrets; he would know exactly how I felt
about myself and him. Who would want me after those truths were
exposed? If I was too scared to admit them even to myself, how
could I expect him not to run when I faced them beneath him?
I lost track of time; I lost count of how
many times he spanked me. I’d always been good at removing myself
from situations mentally. I did it every time I ate, mindlessly
stuffing myself to numb the emotions I could never let go of. I’d
snuck food, more food than my high were metabolism could keep up
with.
When life got hard, when someone made a
nasty comment, when my parents went on about my size, I slipped
away to comfort myself with food. I drowned my sorrow in a new
sorrow.
My family didn’t talk about our problems. We
buried them. My parents’ fights were swept beneath the rug; my
father and brother’s anger issues were swept beneath the rug.
Nothing existed unless we spoke it into existence. The one
exception was my weight. They couldn’t hide my problem; they
couldn’t protect their reputations with me around. I was their
largest issue, their biggest problem in every sense of the
statement.
Every pound on me was a pound of fear, a
pound of sorrow, a pound of pain. I couldn’t deal with them, the
same way they couldn’t deal with me. While my parents and brother
snidely made their feelings known, I choked mine with food. Worse,
rather than empower my wolf, I buried her deep inside me, beneath
my emotions, dwindling her the way I had my self worth. And, rather
than run to Mother Nature for help, I swallowed another chip,
another cookie, another morsel of something I shouldn’t have.
It was all my fault.
That was a hard bite to swallow, a hard reality to
face. Had I handled things differently, I could have prevented
this.
As time dragged on, my body began to grow
weary. Confronting what I’d done to myself, to those around me, for
the past twenty-six years was exhausting. My mind could wander, but
the emotional reality of my personal abuse was enough to drain
me.
Even as another harsh smack landed behind
me, I was able to slip away into oblivion, into the dream world,
where it would never matter that I was twice the weight of my
fellow female weres. It was a place that I could be who I wanted to
be, who I longed to be without the fear of rejection, without the
fear that Jayson would wake up the next day full of regret.
—
Chapter Eight
JAYSON
How the hell did someone fall asleep while
they were being spanked? Damn. I’d really underestimated her
defense mechanisms. She completely shut down.
My wolf roared, his anger reverberating
through me. I fisted my hands as I stared down at her swollen, red
flesh. I’d wanted to increase my strength, wanted to shake her into
cognizance, but I didn’t want to hurt her. I’d watched her
extremely closely, gaging every slight reaction from her. I was
desperate though.
I spun on my heels and punched my fist
through the wall, grunting in rage. She was the most infuriating,
beautiful woman I’d ever met. Apparently it was going to take more
than a little physical reprimand to break her.
I didn’t know how long she would be out for.
I could only imagine the effort it required for her to close
herself off like that.
Damn it. It’d gone completely wrong. I
wanted her to open up to me. I wanted to help her. I wanted to
empower her, not to beat her into unconsciousness.
I scrubbed my face, the whiskers of my
sprouting facial hair scraping against my palms. I refocused my
gaze on her. A new wave of determination erupted from within as my
wolf continued his angry song.
I wasn’t giving up on her. It looked like I
was going to have to up the ante. I was going to have to keep her
teetering between pleasure and pain, a place that kept her body
guessing and her mind active; it was a place where she wouldn’t be
able to hide from herself or me.
I quickly got to work, grabbing what I
needed from my supply chest. With everything open and ready, I
focused on Laina. I unlocked her cuffs and set about stripping her.
As much as I wanted to take my time and touch every part of her,
feel every curve as I exposed it, I had to remain focused on the
big picture, on the end goal. The moment she was naked, I
refastened her restraints. It was only then that I allowed myself
to step back and enjoy the view.
God, she was breathtaking. Every part of her
was round, was soft, silky curves that I knew would be heaven to
cuddle. Her face was flush, her cheeks stained with tears. Even
seeing the physical depths I’d pierced, she was still beautiful. I
couldn’t stop myself from caressing her cheek, trailing my fingers
down her neck, across her pulse point and along the center of her,
leading to her apex.
Inhaling deep, her scent overwhelmed me. Her
delicious aroma sent my wolf into a frenzy. I could easily release
him to bite her while she slept. But I pressed down on him, holding
strong to my control. At the end of the day, this was about her,
not me. I hadn’t been thinking straight when I’d set out to claim
her. What good would it do to have her beside me if she resented
the position? If we weren’t a united front, they would never
respect us.
I sighed. This would have to be her
decision. It would have to be her choice whether or not she
surrendered herself. I could tie her up forever, but until I
breeched that impenetrable wall around her, I would never have all
of her and she would never accept me.
I was selfish enough to take whatever I
could get from her, but I loved her enough not to. I loved her
enough to hold off on my own wants and needs for her benefit. To an
outsider, I was sure spanking her, restraining her, all of this
looked like a power trip on my part. But it was when you were
brought to your knees, forced to face the darkness at your lowest
that you realized how strong you were, that you could face
anything.
I wanted her to know her strength. I wanted
her to know exactly what she was capable of, how much she was
capable of. Even if she refused me at the end, at least I could let
her go knowing I’d given her something she would never again lose:
self-worth.
When you knew exactly what you possessed, no
one could ever demean you. No one could ever belittle it because
you were aware of its full potential, of your full potential.
I watched as her chest rose and fell, her
breasts thrusting up and out with the effort. Her nipples were dark
rosy peaks that had my mouth watering, my groin winding even
tighter.
Damn it. I couldn’t lose control. I had to
ignore my cock, straining up against my stomach. I had to pretend
like my balls weren’t on the verge of exploding, the pressure damn
near agonizing. I cupped myself, squeezing hard, trying to dull the
ache with fresh pain. It did little to relieve the mounting need
building low in my stomach.
I fisted my hands, forcing myself to walk
away. I plopped down in one of the club chairs by the window. I
gripped the arms of the chair, my knuckles white as I clamped down
on the ends.
This was torture. Damn it. I knew beating
myself over things past didn’t change them, but damn, I wish it
did.
I stared at her curvy figure. It was more
gorgeous than I had imagined. Her swells, her rounded features
seemed to ensconce her, wrapping her into an elegant package of
femininity. My hands itched to caress her. Gliding my fingers down
her wasn’t enough. I’d felt her silk beneath them; I knew her
curves would be cushions of satin against my stone.
I bore down on my muscles, punching my wolf
as he pounced towards the surface again. She was lying out, a feast
for us both. I knew the temptation; my body and spirit felt the
temptation, reacted to her lure.
I leapt up the second she began to stir.
She stretched, her eyes fluttering open. The
moment she realized her situation, I saw the panic rise within her.
Her gaze slid down her body, then narrowed on me. She jerked on the
bindings.
“
Jayson!”
I watched as her anger slid beneath
embarrassment. She averted her gaze, her cheeks flaming.
I knew it was time. She would learn exactly
what she did to me, and I’d see to it that she embraced the power
she had over me.
I strolled towards her. As I loomed over
her, I cupped her cheek and turned her face towards me. She
immediately closed her eyes.
“
Open them,” I
ordered.
She hesitantly shook her head ‘no.’
“
Laina, look at me.” My
tone was more abrasive this time.
She bit her bottom lip, squeezing her
eyelids.
I moved my hand, depriving her of the
contact I knew her wolf craved. “Last chance.”
She remained deathly still, not heeding my
warning.
I carefully climbed on the bed, ensuring I
didn’t touch her. I placed my knees between hers and leaned
forward, my lower arms holding the weight of my upper body, braced
on either side of her chest.
My wolf punched my core, thrashing about in
an effort to break me. I’d never been so close to her, so close to
what I wanted, yet so far.
I swallowed hard, trying to retain my calm,
hard façade.
I slid my gaze over her. I was captured,
enraptured by her perfect mounds, plush and full. They sat begging
for my mouth to claim them. And that’s when I decided I would
attack them first.
Shifting my weight to my elbows, I grabbed
her breasts. Her breath hitched the second my hands framed her
intimate flesh. Her breasts immediately molded to my palms.
It was her turn to swallow hard. She tugged
her arms, but only proceeded to jam her hands tighter into the
cuffs.
I smiled a predatory smile, a deviant smile
even as she held tightly to her rebellion. Her eyes remained
clamped shut.
I swiped my thumbs across her sensitive
buds. She gasped, her eyelids flying open.
“
What are you doing?” she
demanded, indignation resounding in her tone.
“
Why don’t you defend
yourself?” I flicked my thumbs again.
She flushed, biting her inner lip. She was
controlling her reaction; the initial shock had worn off quickly. I
would have to become more aggressive with my pursuit.
She glared at me. “I don’t have to answer
that.”
“
Fine, but I promise you’ll
want to when I take you to the edge and refuse to let you go over
it.”
Before she could respond, I capture one of
her nipples in my mouth. I lapped my tongue over the tight bud as I
pinched her other peak.
Her brows furrowed inwards as she more
sharply bit her lip. There was stress in her eyes. I could tell she
wanted to let loose, but she wasn’t allowing herself to, which
frustrated the hell out of me.
I nipped at her sensitive flesh, thoroughly
laving the tight bud before switching breasts. It was the change
that shocked her, garnering a whimper from her.
I drew back. “Why don’t you stand up for
yourself?”
She frowned, opening and closing her mouth
several times, but not saying anything. When she clinched her mouth
shut for the final time, I growled, squeezing her breasts
roughly.
I slid up her, leaning in near her ear. “You
will answer that question before the day is over.”
I lightly bit her ear lobe, moving down to
kiss the pulse point in her neck. I drew my tongue up and down over
her pulsing vein before running my teeth gently over her jaw. I
nearly shouted in victory when her lower body squirmed.
I held my aching lower half away from her.
Should my cock feel her warmth, I knew it would be over.
—
Chapter Nine
LAINA
My pussy gushed with need, with a novel
yearning that had my legs fumbling, my ankles jerking on the cuffs.
My breasts throbbed, a fresh ache awakened within them. His mouth
had felt like heaven against my flesh; I swore I heard angels sing
when his tongue passed over my nipples.
Of course, I knew what he was doing. He’d
warned me. Perhaps I didn’t have any sexual experience, but I’d
read enough books to know. All the “prep books” I’d devoured didn’t
prepare me for the sensations that wracked my body when he touched
me though.
He smiled knowingly as he kissed a trail
down my neck and over the swells of my breasts. He sucked a tight
peak into his mouth. I wanted to cry out; I wanted to thrust deeper
into his mouth, into the warm, wet soft cave of his mouth. But I
didn’t. I held still. I stiffened my muscles and fought every
instinct, every desire.