Almost Perfect (31 page)

‘Hey there, Georgie girl!'

‘Now how did I know you were going to say that?' said Georgie as she crossed the room, dumping her bag on the sofa on the way.

‘I guess you must be psycho,' said Nick.

‘Psy-chic, brother, psy-
chic
.'

He came around the kitchen bench. ‘I thought you weren't going to make it. Louise said you called in sick this morning?'

‘I slept most of the day, but when I woke up I felt a lot better,' she told him. ‘And besides, I didn't want to miss out. I haven't seen Zan since they got back from overseas.'

‘Well I'm glad you're here,' he said, giving her a hug. ‘There are potatoes that need peeling.'

Georgie pulled a face. ‘I hate peeling potatoes!'

‘So do I,' Nick returned, releasing her. ‘But I can cook. So you get stuck with the unskilled labour.'

‘I don't know if I should be handling food that other people are going to have to eat. What if I pass my lurgy on to everyone?'

‘Don't worry. I'll be cooking at high enough temperatures to kill off any lingering germs.'

‘Hmm, maybe I should boil myself up?' she mused. ‘Get rid of this thing once and for all.'

‘I'm no doctor, but I wouldn't recommend that.'

‘It's just getting me down,' she grizzled, walking past him into the kitchen and opening the utensil drawer. She started searching around for a vegetable
peeler. ‘Every other day I think I'm coming down with something, and then it peters out.'

‘It's probably stress,' said Nick, disappearing inside the pantry.

‘Ah, stress,' Georgie exclaimed, waving the peeler in the air. ‘It's such a useful label, isn't it? Covers a multitude of sins.'

Nick appeared again holding a bag of potatoes. ‘You've had plenty of reasons to feel stressed.'

‘Come on, Nick, I haven't seen or heard from him for over a month,' she said. ‘I think that excuse is losing its teeth.'

He came over beside her, resting the bag on the bench. ‘I'm very proud of you, you know. You've handled all this with a lot of strength and dignity.'

Georgie shrugged. ‘What choice did I have?'

‘You had plenty of choices. You could have fallen apart, you could have taken him back . . . instead, you moved on. And I think that takes a lot of courage.' He planted a solid kiss on her forehead.

‘Thank you,' she said quietly. She looked at the bag of potatoes. ‘How many of these do you want peeled?'

‘Just the whole bag.'

She groaned. ‘I really should have learned how to cook.'

‘You really should have.'

Zan cleared her throat, claiming the family's attention from the photos they were passing around. ‘You know we didn't only go for a holiday?'

‘You weren't drug-running, I hope?' said Nick. ‘I've warned you about that.'

Zan rolled her eyes. She had come alone tonight. Jules was going through the worst part of the treatment cycle, just before egg retrieval. She was taking a cocktail of hormones that left her feeling sick and bloated and tender, and the last thing she was up to was a night out.

‘We visited a couple of clinics while we were in the States,' Zan explained.

‘Fertility clinics?' asked Louise.

She nodded.

‘Ours aren't good enough for you?' said Nick.

‘Not for what we're considering. One of the reasons Jules is having so much difficulty has to do with the quality of her eggs. We could have more luck with donor eggs, but it's not a very common practice here in Australia. It's against the law to pay for eggs, so there are barely any donors, and long waiting lists. Some legislation even prevents the use of donor eggs unless there are genetic issues involved. So you can imagine a couple of lesbians are way down the eligibility list.'

‘But it's different in America?' Nick asked.

Zan nodded. ‘In the birthplace of capitalism, if you're prepared to pay the price, you can get anything you want.'

‘You're actually considering this?' Louise frowned.

‘Absolutely. We're crossing our fingers for this cycle, and hopefully they'll retrieve enough eggs for at least one frozen cycle as well. But if we've had no
luck after that, we'll make arrangements to go back to the US later in the year.'

‘So let me understand this,' said Louise, glancing across at her daughters who were lying prone on the floor in front of the television, engrossed in
The Simpsons
. For once it didn't bother her. ‘You're prepared to go halfway across the world and use some American woman's eggs–'

‘We'll be using my eggs,' Zan corrected her.

‘What?' Nick and Louise said simultaneously.

‘I'll be the egg donor. I'll have to go on a course of drugs similar to what Jules is taking now, up to the point where they retrieve the eggs. Then it proceeds the same as any IVF treatment – they fertilise the eggs, freeze some and implant some, but they'll implant them into Jules instead.'

‘For crying out loud,' muttered Louise.

‘What?'

‘Why don't you just have the baby and get it over with, Zan?' she declared.

‘Because,' Zan returned calmly, ‘I don't want to have a baby. We've been through this before.'

‘And it still doesn't make any sense,' said Louise. ‘Why would you put yourself, let alone Jules, through that when in all likelihood you could go through a simple insemination and get pregnant straight away?'

Zan was unfazed. ‘Actually, Jules and I are quite excited about the idea. I mean, think about it. We were using donor sperm and Jules's eggs and her uterus, I wasn't part of it, except in spirit. Now we'll use donor sperm to fertilise my eggs, and Jules will
carry the baby and give birth to it. It'll certainly be her baby, and now it will be biologically mine as well.'

Louise stood up and started clearing plates noisily.

‘Why does it bother you so much, Louise?'

‘I'd rather not get into it,' she said curtly.

‘No, let's get right into it,' Zan insisted. ‘Boots and all, Louise, just say what's on your mind.'

Louise stopped stacking the plates and looked directly at her. ‘You really want me to tell you what I think?'

‘I really do.'

‘You really don't,' Nick muttered.

‘I think some people are not meant to have babies. There I said it.'

Zan was momentarily speechless.

‘By that, I don't mean for a nanosecond that they don't deserve a baby like anyone else, that they wouldn't make as good a parent, if not better than the general population. That's not what I'm saying. But physically, biologically, whatever, some women are not equipped to become pregnant and deliver a healthy baby. You should look at the statistics some time, Zan, I'm pretty sure I've read there's more risk of complications during IVF births, and a higher incidence of birth defects in IVF babies as well.'

‘You don't think we've researched this, Louise? What do you take us for?' said Zan. ‘The higher incidence of complications is almost directly related to the higher incidence of multiple births from IVF pregnancies. And try as they might, they can't find
conclusive evidence that IVF itself creates defects at birth. But I wonder if you read about this, Louise? They have studied attachment after the birth and IVF parents have it all over “natural” parents.'

‘That's not the point. Tell me, Zan, if something happens to Jules while she's pregnant or delivering, how are you going to feel? Will it all be worth it then?'

‘Jules knows what she's doing. I'm not forcing her, this is something she wants to do, it's her choice.'

‘Fifty years ago she wouldn't have had a choice. People who couldn't have babies just got on with their lives.'

‘But now we do have choices, Louise.'

‘Simply because medical technology
can
doesn't mean we should.'

Zan paused, her eyes narrowing. ‘Okay, so when Nick's heart gives out on him in twenty years–'

‘Steady on, that only puts me in my fifties.'

‘–you're not going to avail yourself of everything medical science has to offer?' she continued. ‘Of course not, you'll just say, oh well, that's his use-by date. C'est la vie.'

‘You wouldn't say that, would you, Lulu? You don't even speak French.'

Louise ignored Nick. ‘I'm not talking about saving lives that already exist. I'm talking about going to extreme and ridiculous lengths to create new lives for an already overcrowded planet.'

‘Oh for crying out loud, Louise, you had no problem adding another two lives to an overcrowded planet.'

‘We simply replaced ourselves, that's all.'

‘And I'm sure if Jules was married to a man, you wouldn't have a problem with her employing all the medical know-how available to bear him a child and prop up the patriarchal order of things.'

‘Zan! Look who you're talking to,' Louise cried, raising her arms. ‘Have you noticed much propping of the patriarchal order going on around here? I couldn't care less if it's a man and a woman, two men, two women, two donkeys, whatever, it's a waste of limited resources.'

‘IVF does not prevent poor people from receiving medical attention or children from getting vaccinations, that's not how it works. In fact, we don't get it for free, but I don't mind paying extra because that enables research into infertility to continue.'

‘Yeah, so they can find ways to select sex or eye colour–'

‘Okay, I'm pulling patriarchal rank now,' said Nick. ‘Time to change the subject.'

‘Good idea,' Louise muttered, carrying a stack of plates over to the kitchen.

‘You're quiet, George,' said Zan.

‘Hmm?'

‘You haven't got anything to add to the debate?'

‘I thought we were changing the subject?' said Georgie.

‘I'm sure if you were the one having a baby, we wouldn't be changing the subject so readily.'

Georgie sniggered. ‘We're playing hypotheticals now?'

Nick winked at her, leaning forward with the bottle of wine to top up her glass. Georgie covered it, shaking her head.

‘But you've hardly had any,' he said.

‘My stomach's not up to it.'

‘How come?' asked Zan.

‘I've had a mild lingering bug,' Georgie explained. ‘It's nothing.'

Zan sat back in her chair, regarding her sister. ‘So, how are you, George, you know, generally?'

‘I'm okay,' she answered lightly.

‘Has the dickhead been hanging around, bothering you?' Zan had taken to referring to Liam only as “the dickhead”.

Georgie shook her head.

‘She's been incredible,' said Nick proudly. ‘Really moving on with her life, aren't you, sis?'

‘I don't know.' Sometimes Georgie wished Nick would stop being so damned proud of her. He didn't see her moping around the flat, crying herself to sleep. But she had to keep up a brave face. It was bad enough she'd been fooled by a liar and a cheat, if they had any idea she'd succumbed to his advances the minute she'd laid her eyes on him again . . . ‘I'm not so sure I'm moving on.'

‘Why do you say that?' asked Zan.

She shrugged. ‘Well, I'm in exactly the same place as I was before. I think I should probably be doing something else with my life.'

‘You're not happy at the shop?' Louise frowned, rejoining them at the table.

‘Yes! Of course I am, I love the shop,' she
insisted. ‘I don't really want another career . . . but I do want something.'

‘You want another bloke,' said Zan. ‘Just make it a single one this time.'

Georgie was shaking her head. ‘Oh no, no, no, that ship has sailed . . . and sunk, deep down under the ocean.'

‘Come on, Georgie, you're only thirty-three,' Nick chided.

Georgie looked at Louise. ‘I told you that number had bad feng shui.'

‘So what's the something you're talking about?' Zan persisted.

‘I don't really know,' said Georgie. ‘But I feel like this has been one of those pivotal moments in my life, a seminal moment, where nothing will be as it was before.'

‘She's been raiding the self-help section at the shop,' said Louise drily. ‘You should see the tripe she's been reading.
Strong Hearts Don't Break
,
Women Who Run with the Wild Horses
,
Feng Shui for the Wounded Soul
.'

‘Make fun if you will,' said Georgie airily. ‘But I'm only taking on what speaks to me.'

‘George, could you please stop talking like a Zen monk?' said Zan.

‘Leave her alone,' said Nick. ‘If it helps, what's wrong with that?'

‘Because it's crap,' Zan exclaimed. ‘Chanting trite couplets won't magically improve her life. George has spent enough time in fantasy land, she needs to face up to the real world.'

‘That's a bit harsh, Zan,' said Nick. ‘I think Georgie's had a big dose of reality lately.'

‘Yeah, only because her head was so far up in the clouds she didn't even realise the dickhead was stringing her along.'

‘Could you talk
to
me, not about me, please?' Georgie said politely but firmly. They both looked at her. ‘I know I've had a tendency to go off with the pixies, Zan, you're right. I've made some poor choices based on pretty fanciful ideas at times. I told you, Nick, what went through my head the first day Liam came into the shop.'

He nodded.

‘What? What!' Zan and Louise chorused.

‘Don't tell them,' Nick warned.

‘It's all right,' said Georgie calmly. ‘The first time I saw Liam, the thought came to me from nowhere – “I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him.”'

Zan shook her head, rolling her eyes. Louise made a snorting noise in an attempt to contain her laughter.