All Mye Queen's Men, Chronicles of Love - Volume II (59 page)

“
Look, I know that I shouldn't have tried to press the sex issue.  I'm sorry about that. It was selfish, and I promise I won't do it again.  But, please don't go.  I didn't mean to ruin your birthday.  I thought you wanted to...  Stay here with me.  I made you a birthday cake.” 

Christian
stops in his tracks. “What did you say? You did what?”

“
I made you a birthday cake.”

Christian
laughs. “You baked a cake?  This I got to see.”

“
What?  I can bake.” Queen giggled. Why you act like that’s so incredible?”

“
You can barely cook.”

“
Baking and cooking are two different things.  You haven't had cake until you taste my Chocolate, Chocolate, Chocolate cake surprise.” 

Christian
tosses his keys on the coffee table and takes a seat on the sofa. “Okay...  So, what's the surprise other than the fact that you made it?”

“
Try it and see.”

“
Alright, bring it out.” 

Queen
turns to leave, but she stops and turns back to face Christian. “Christian, I'm sorry I tried to seduce you.”

“
Not as sorry as I am that I had to stop you.”  Christian winked. 

They
both Laughed, although they knew that there was actually nothing funny about their situation. Queen recognized that Christian had real feelings for her, but she couldn’t really process that until she dealt with her love for Bear. To say the least she realized that until she broke free of the incomprehensible bond between her and Teddy, she could not begin to explore the depths of her true feelings for Christian.

In
so many ways and on so many levels Christian was right. However, the foul should have been charged to Queen, not him. Queen was the one who was in a committed relationship, not Christian. Yet she was the one who continued to press the intimacy issue, every chance she got. Not to say that she didn’t have legitimate feelings for Christian that did not initiate from between her thighs. Still, she stood to lose a lot if she walked away from her Teddy Bear. He was all that she had left since she had blown Logic off in an attempt to give her relationship with Teddy a fair chance. Christian may very well prove to be a suitable substitute for Teddy and maybe even Logic. Nonetheless, Queen was more determined than ever to sample the swizzle stick. She had tasted far too much good dick to risk getting stuck with a mediocre one at best.

As
Jade stares at her reflection in the three hundred and sixty degree mirror at the bridal shop she couldn’t believe that her wedding was in less than twenty four hours. Today was her final dress fitting and to her surprise everything was absolutely perfect. Well, that is until she catches a glimpse of her Maid of Honor, and notices that she is paying more attention to her phone than she is to the Bride to Be. 

“
Queen, how does it look?  Be honest tell me what you think?”  Jade asks as she admires her beautiful strapless, crystal encrusted, form fitting, ivory wedding gown.

Queen
who is preoccupied with checking her text messages doesn’t respond. She had called and texted Teddy over an hour ago and he had not responded. She could only hope that by some miracle he had rearranged his schedule and was in flight from Los Angeles.

“
Okay look , put that damn phone up, and tell me how you like my dress.  I swear you have to be the worse damn Maid of Honor in the history of Maids of Honor.  You haven't taken your face out of that damn phone the entire time we've been here.  Staring at the phone is not going to make him call.  He already told you he's not coming.  Hell the sack of shit hardly ever shows up in Baltimore, so put the fuckin phone down for just ten damn minutes and act like you're here for me.”

Queen
looks up stunned and astonished at the same time. Jade looked absolutely breathtaking in that gown. Suddenly, it hit Queen, her best friend was actually getting married. Naturally, a flood of mixed feelings quickly overwhelmed her.

“
Oh my God!  I can't believe that you just said that.  You're lucky that you look so damn beautiful in that dress.  Else, I'd come over there and slap your little bitch ass for saying what you just said.”

“
You like? Tell me what you’re thinking.”

“
Oh hell no!  I love!  Wow!  Jade, that dress is stunning on you.  I can't believe my girl is actually getting married.” Queen managed to get out before her emotions welled up in her throat and begin to choke her like a lump of stale bread.

“
Don't start that shit Queen.  I'm not going to cry.  So don't you start.”

“
I know but, now it all seems so real.  I'm sorry, but I can't help it.  I'm so happy for you.  You found someone who loves you enough to...”  Tears sting Queen’s face and her feelings get the best of her. She could no longer masquerade her pain, so she quickly walks out of the bridal viewing room. 

Jade
lifts up her dress and rushes after her. She knew exactly what was going on. She knew that it was just a matter of time before Queen broke.

“
Queen, wait.  Queen, please stop.  You know I can't run in this tight ass dress.” 

Queen
stops, but her back remains turned to Jade. She can’t face her. She would just die if the words ‘I told you so!’ crossed Jade’s lips.

Jade
warned her not to call off her engagement to Logic. If all had went as planned Queen would have been happily married to Logic and not playing phone tag with Bear’s slag ass.

In
retrospect she fucked up big letting Logic go. She loved him, there was no second guessing that, and there was no doubt that he loved her. The problem was she couldn’t stop loving Bear. Queen knew what she was facing leaving Logic. But she loved him too much to continue cheating on him with Bear. He deserved better than that, unfortunately the demons of her past just wouldn’t allow her to give it to him.  

Yes,
Jade knew exactly what the waterworks were really all about, but the last thing on earth she’d tell Queen right now is, “I told you so!”

She
knew how much it hurt Queen to walk away from Logic. It broke her heart to see Queen still distraught over this today, of all days, after all of these years. This was supposed to be a happy day, not a day of regrets.

Jade
spins Queen around, wipes the tears from her eyes and hugs her as close and as tight as she could. “Queen I know what this is all about.  I said what I said out of stress and frustration.  I shouldn't have said it I'm sorry.”

“
You said what you said because it’s the truth.  You don't have to apologize for telling the truth, even when the truth hurts.”

“
Even still, sometimes the truth hurts too much and if I had taken the time to assess the situation I would have realized that those words would cut you like a knife.  I didn't mean to hurt you, Queen.”

“
I'm okay.  I'm just emotional because you make an amazing Bride. Fuck Bear.  I stopped crying over him months ago.  If he's not going to value this thing we got then fuck it and fuck him.  I'm just so damn happy for you.  You two are good together and you both deserve to be happy.  And I want that, but I think I let it get away from me when I let Logic go.”

Jade
pushes Queen at arm’s length and cups Queen’s face in her hands.  She locks eyes on Queen and speaks from the heart. “Queen, you're going to have this and more, but honey you got to let this thing with Teddy go.  Right now, this shit is killing you. Your relationship is hurting you more than it's helping you.  Yeah he loves you, yeah you love him, yeah the sex is mind blowing and yeah he takes excellent care of you, but that's just not enough.  Queen, you know he's incapable of being faithful to you. And we both know that it’s not because he doesn't try, because he tries real hard. He's just too damaged to pull it off.” 

“
Jade
I'm damaged too. I did as much dirt as he did until Christian showed up. Which is the dirtiest dirt that I've done to date. Even though we're not having sex, Christian I were inappropriate from the moment we met. Bear and I need each other. With Paul gone... I can't explain it, but we just need each other.”

“
Look,
you two can't keep using each other as a crutch to get over Paul's murder.  Continue to love Teddy, but as your friend, not as your man.  Cut out the sex.  It doesn't belong in your friendship.  Find another way to deal with what happened besides fucking each others brains out every time you think about Paul.  Queen you got to stop it.  Teddy can't stop it and he won't stop it, but you can.  Love isn't unfaithful and loves not suppose to hurt like you're hurting right now.  What you need to do is roll that nigga over to the friends forever zone and get with Christian.  You two are great together. Now that's who you need to be with.”

“
Jade, I can't roll out on Bear like that.  He needs me.  I don't know what he'd do if we broke up.  Let alone if I hooked up with his boy.”

“
He'd get over it, Queen.  That's what he'd do.  You can't play psychiatrist to Teddy.  If he needs help then let's get him some help. Hell, he's got enough money.  Your pussy is no substitute for professional counseling.  Go to counseling together if you have to, cause I'm not sure you haven't loss your damn mind too.  I've never seen you let a man walk over you like this, especially, when an eligible replacement is waiting at your beck and call.  What the hell is up?”

“
Jade, it's not like that.  You don't understand.”

“
Then make me understand, cause I don't get it.  All I see is that Teddy has fucked up my best friend's whole life and I don't know how to fix it.”  Tears begin to scream down Jade’s face and her voice begins to crack. “So make me understand Queen, because if you don't I'm going to have to postpone my wedding, fly to LA and  stick my foot in that fool's ass and bitch slap the bitch that he's riding.  So make me understand.” 

They
both laugh through tears. “There you go.  Threatening to bitch slap somebody's ass, yet again.  Look, I'm going to handle it.”

“
Handle it soon and one day I'll be the Matron of Honor at your wedding.”

“
Wedding!  Wedding dress!  Jade you still have on your dress.”

“
Oh my God!  Please don't tell me you slobbered all over my damn wedding gown.  I'll have to bust your ass too!” 

Queen
quickly checks the dress for stains, fortunately the dress was fine.  “Hold still let me see.  You're cool.  Thank God, my lack luster ass was too lazy to put on makeup.”

“
I wasn't going to bring it up, but you are looking tore up today.  What's up with you?”

“
I don't know.  I'm a little down. Logic called. And I was looking forward to seeing Teddy this weekend, but he's not coming.”

“
Holdup, did you say that Logic called you. Is he coming to the wedding?”

“
No, I don't think so.  He's shooting a film and he's not sure he can get away. At least that’s what he said. He hasn't been to Baltimore since I blew him off the last time he came. Anyway, he sends his love. He’s sending your gift to my house since you guys will be in Hawaii for two weeks.”

“
So, is he still single? What’s his story?”

“
See, there you go starting shit. His story is history. I didn’t even get into that with him. That ship has so sailed. I keep telling you that Logic and I are just friends. I can't begin to bring myself to fuck up his life any more than I already have.”

“
Funny, you say that now, but every time he comes to Baltimore you seem to find yourself on your back, with your legs open, staring googly eyed into his face.”

“
Mind your business, old lady. That doesn’t concern you and if anybody named Teddy Bear Davine ever asks… It never happened. Besides that's over too. He deserves better and apparently I'm incapable of being better. Not to mention he doesn't have a clue about my antics with Christian. So, that's pretty much it for him and that.”

“
Okay, so back to Teddy.  Are you going to just stop breathing because that nigga disappointed you again?”

“
No, but it's been awhile if you know what I mean.  This has been a real hard three months.”

“
I guess it has been, with Christian’s hard dick in your face every day.  I told you about playing house with that man.  I don't know why you don't just go ahead and give him some.”

“
We're not playing house and he doesn't want any.  Well, at least not until I call it done with Bear.”

“
Then call that shit.  Half the women in this city would snatch you bald for Chris.”

“
You more than anybody in the world know that it's not that damn simple.  Okay I admit that I've let Christian get in a little too deep.”

“
You need to let him go as deep as that dick will take him.  Enough, of all this bullshit.  Teddy fucks who he wants when he wants and the only thing you do is get mad.  Don't get mad get some.”

“
You know that I'm a freak but I've never been a hoe.  I can't do that.”

“
Queen tell me you don't want to fuck Chris.”

“
I didn't say that I didn't want to.  I said I can't, because he won't.  There's a big difference. I can’t exactly rape the man. He’s holding out for something that I just don’t have to give.”

“
You two might as well go ahead and screw. It's just a matter of time.  You're already cheating.”

“
We are not cheating.”

“
Oh yeah?  Then tell Teddy that Christian is sleeping in his house.  Better yet tell him that you're spending the night at Christian's.”

“
So what if we sleep in the same bed.  Nothing happens.”

“
Oh my God! don't tell me you two are sleeping in the same damn bed.”

“
I just did.  It doesn't matter, because nothing goes down.”

“
Queen, you and Chris are lovers, plain and simple.  It doesn't matter if you screw him or not.”

“
Jade, I know, but I don't see a way out without somebody getting hurt.”

“
I don't see how you can keep it up without somebody getting hurt. Teddy's going to fuck both of y'all up when he finds out.  You're going to have to choose.”

“
Maybe so, but I just don't want Christian to be the rebound guy.”

“
I don't know what to tell you. Other than I don’t think Chris really cares if he’s the rebound guy. He just wants to be your guy.”

“
I know, but it’s just not in the cards. You're right about one thing, I do owe Bear some serious pay back.  I can't believe I let that bitch play me like that.  Oh I am so getting me some dick tonight.”

“
Great!  Let's get out of here, cause we got some serious work to do.  Have you seen that head of yours?”

“
What's wrong with it?”

“
Oh my God, you're a stylist's nightmare.”

“
You think I can get an appointment on this short notice.”

“
Honey, you think I was going to let you look busted in my wedding pictures.  Oh, no, no, no!  I made your ass an appointment two weeks ago.  Lady Di is expecting you in a half an hour.”