Absolution (The Protectors, Book 1) (19 page)

“Did he leave?” Jonas asked, his fingers working furiously on whatever he was drawing.

“No. He just needed some time to clear his head. I saw him walking down the driveway an hour ago.”

Jonas nodded.

“How are Casey and Devlin doing?”

“Okay considering what’s happened. They were both really scared about possibly losing the baby but the doctors are sure she’ll be able to carry it to term if she doesn’t get too stressed. They wanted me to come out there to stay with them but I told them it wasn’t safe.”

He fell silent as he focused on his work.

“Can I see?” I asked.

He nodded and handed me the sketchpad. He leaned back against the headboard next to me so he could watch me flip through the pages. The first page had a picture of the horse from Casey and Devlin’s barn as well as drawings of Ryan and Isabel Prescott. The second page had a picture of me and Mace lying in bed, my front to Mace’s back, my head resting against Mace’s neck. Mace’s eyes were closed but mine were open. I knew exactly when the picture was from – it was from the night before when Jonas and I had made love to Mace and he’d fallen asleep between us. Jonas and I had just stared at each other as we listened to Mace’s soft breathing.

“You knew it before I did,” I said as I studied the expression on my face. I was a man at peace…a man who was exactly where he was supposed to be. I looked up at Jonas. “I didn’t fully admit to myself that I was in love with both of you until this afternoon when Ronan arrived.”

Jonas didn’t say anything. He just took the pad from me and placed it on the nightstand on his side of the bed and then shifted until he was straddling me. I let my hands settle on his hips as he leaned down to kiss me. All the kisses Jonas had instigated with me had always started off tentative, as if he was unsure of what my reaction would be. This kiss…with this one he went straight in for the kill because by the time his tongue was done mating with mine, I was desperately rocking my hips up against him in an effort to ease the ache in my dick. I sat up so our bodies were flush and wrapped my arms around his waist as I took everything he gave me. When he was done, he pulled back and rested his forehead against mine.

“I always wondered what would have happened if things had been different. If I’d begged my parents to let me stay. If I’d picked some other city besides Chicago. If I’d pushed down on the razor blade just a little bit harder. I’ve stopped wondering because all those things led me to you. To this moment. It was all worth it,” Jonas said, his voice breaking. “It was all fucking worth it.” Then he kissed me again until we were both shaking.

“I love you, Cole,” Jonas breathed against my lips. His fingers fisted in my hair as he ate at my lips and when my hands slid to his ass, he began rubbing against me, his erection brushing mine. When we separated again, his skin was flushed and his hands trembled as he cupped my face.

“Promise me you won’t leave him,” Jonas whispered. “You’re strong enough to bring him back from wherever he has to go inside of himself to do this.”

Jonas didn’t wait for my answer. Maybe because he knew it was a promise I wasn’t sure I could make. His fingers skirted over my sides before he lifted my shirt and dragged it over my head. He put just enough space between our bodies so he could pull his own shirt off and then he wrapped himself around me again. “Can I make love to you, Cole?”

My heart stuttered to a stop at the words. I’d been mentally preparing myself for this moment but I hadn’t expected Jonas to take the initiative. And although I was terrified of the unknown, I still wanted it. I wanted that moment where I gave myself over to someone else’s keeping. Where all I had to do was feel.

I hadn’t even realized I hadn’t responded in any way until Jonas suddenly stammered, “I’m sorry, maybe Mace should, since I’ve never-”

I silenced him with a kiss. “I want it to be you. I want us to have these firsts together.”

Jonas was panting hard and I could already feel his soft skin slickening with sweat. I loved knowing how badly he wanted me. Our kisses quickly turned frantic and I could feel Jonas’s fingers tugging desperately at the button on my jeans but before he could finish the task, we both heard the door open.

Jonas stilled as his eyes connected with Mace’s and I felt all the tension return to his body. Mace wasn’t faring any better because his eyes skimmed us with longing and then he was turning around.

“Mace,” Jonas whispered.

Mace stopped but it took him a long time to turn around. When he finally did, he looked like he was preparing to hear the worst. But Jonas didn’t say anything at all. And he didn’t move off my lap. What he did next had my love for him flaring up in my chest.

He held out his hand to Mace.

And poor Mace just stared at Jonas’s extended arm like he didn’t know what it was. Then his face fell and I could see the relief there. Once he reached the bed, he took Jonas’s hand in his and then leaned down to kiss him. It was soft and sweet and full of apology and while I knew it did nothing to solve the underlying issues between the two men, it was a truce of sorts. Mace cupped his hand around the back of my neck and kissed me in much the same way.

There were no words after that. Everything that was said was done with a look or a touch.

While Mace worked his shirt off, Jonas shifted his attention back to my pants. I tried to control my raging desire by forcing deep breaths into my lungs but then Mace was shifting me so that he was able to push my upper body flat on the bed. He unfolded his long body so that it was lying next to mine and he began teasing my lips with shallow kisses while Jonas scooted farther down my legs to pull my now open pants down. His hands coasted up my thighs at the same time that Mace began teasing my nipples with his calloused fingers. And then I felt Jonas’s hand slide over my hardness with only the fabric of my underwear separating us. He gave me a few experimental strokes and then his fingers grabbed the waistband of my briefs and tugged them down and tossed them to the floor.

Mace’s mouth had started exploring my jawline but I felt him still against me and I knew we were both focused on Jonas as he stared at my flushed, leaking cock. He looked so torn that I wanted to open my mouth to tell him that he didn’t need to do this but Mace’s fingers subtly pressed into my side. Whatever internal struggle Jonas was dealing with went on for several long moments. I wanted to curse my own dick for the way it twitched under Jonas’s perusal. Jonas suddenly lifted his eyes up to mine and held there for a moment before he lowered his upper body and placed his nose against my groin and inhaled deeply. And when his fingers closed gently around the base of my dick and his tongue flitted over the crown, I nearly wept at the relief that flooded through me. After that, they showed me no mercy. Mace sucked my tongue into his mouth repeatedly as his hands roamed over every part of me he could reach. At one point, he took over stroking my dick with his hand when Jonas began licking my balls before sucking them into his mouth.

I couldn’t stop the moans that fell from my lips and the only thing that kept me from bucking wildly beneath Jonas’s teasing tongue was Mace’s upper body pressed over mine. When Jonas sucked me deep into his mouth, I groaned against Mace’s lips. “I can’t, Mace. It’s too good.”

Mace smiled against my mouth. “He’s just getting started, baby.” Mace leaned back and dragged me up against his chest, supporting my shoulders so that I could watch Jonas work me over. But nothing prepared me for the sight of Jonas reaching his left hand up my thigh to my stomach so that he could twine his fingers with Mace’s hand as it rested there.

“Jonas, I’m going to come,” I warned as the pressure in my balls kept building and my skin drew tight across my body. Every tug of Jonas’s lips had electricity shooting up my spine but it wasn’t until Jonas’s finger slipped between my cheeks and stroked over my hole that I exploded. I expected Jonas to pull off as I came but he began swallowing me down. I heard Mace groan at the sight of my come spilling from between Jonas’s lips and as my orgasm crested, I watched Mace drag Jonas up to us so he could crush their mouths together. Jonas’s jeans scraped over my sensitive dick and I moaned as another tremor went through me. I tasted come as someone kissed me but I was still too overcome with the sparks that were still firing through me to know who it was.

Jonas’s weight disappeared off my body and I managed to come back to awareness long enough to watch Jonas and Mace undressing each other, stealing kisses as they went. Once Jonas was naked, he crawled back on top of me and sought out my mouth again. I still felt sated from the orgasm but every time his tongue swept over mine, I could feel my body trying to find the energy to command my dick to respond. When the mattress dipped next to us, I heard Mace whisper in my ear to roll over. I didn’t know what his plan was and I didn’t care since the position meant I got to have Jonas beneath me. Although I could feel Jonas’s erection between us, I still paid attention to his breathing and his body to make sure I wasn’t scaring him. But his kisses remained as hungry and as needy as mine and he kept his arms locked around my neck.

I felt the bed move as Mace shifted farther down it but when his hands closed around my hips, I tensed. I hadn’t realized I’d stopped kissing Jonas until I felt his fingers skirt through my hair and give me a gentle tug. “He’s going to get you ready for me,” Jonas whispered. “It’s going to feel so good being inside you,” he said as his tongue licked my lower lip before tugging it between his teeth. This sexy, confident side of Jonas had me intrigued and well on my way to rock hard again.

Mace lifted my hips until I was on my knees but he spread my legs wide and kept his hand on my back to keep me pressed up against Jonas. His rough palms began kneading the globes of my ass but when he split me open, my whole body locked up tight. Mentally I knew what went into preparing me to take Jonas inside of my body but the unknown of how it would feel was messing with my head.

“Talk to me,” Jonas said softly as his hands roamed over my back.

“I’m nervous,” I admitted.

“That it will hurt?” Jonas asked.

“Nervous that I won’t be able to give this to you,” I admitted. Because I knew even if there wasn’t much pain, I might not like the act, no matter how gentle Mace and Jonas were with me.

“You and Mace have already given me enough firsts to last a lifetime, Cole,” Jonas whispered.

I didn’t get a chance to respond because at the exact moment I opened my mouth to speak, I felt hot, wet heat slick over my hole. I gasped first in surprise, then in pleasure as sensation flooded my nerve endings. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that it wasn’t a lube covered finger pressing against me.

“Fuck,” I groaned as Mace’s tongue repeated the move and I managed to look over my shoulder to see Mace’s face buried between the globes of my ass, his big hands holding me open. Another gentle lick had me hanging my head and I felt Jonas’s fingers teasing a sensitive spot behind my ear. My knees began to shake under the strain of trying to hold my weight up and when I felt Mace begin licking me in long, heavy drags that started at my taint, drifted over my hole and slid up my crack, I gave up and dropped my weight on Jonas. Mace’s sinful mouth only left me for a moment before it was back. I could feel his arms on the backs of my thighs so I knew he’d shifted his position so he was lying behind me.

A couple more licks had me rubbing my hard dick against Jonas’s shaft but when Mace applied suction, I let out a hoarse shout. I knew I needed to distract myself or I’d come so hard that there’d be no way I’d be able to recover before Jonas could get inside of me so I lifted myself off of Jonas and said, “Slide up.”

Jonas hesitated for only a moment before he did what I asked. I was glad the bed was king sized because it gave us plenty of room to maneuver until Jonas’s beautiful, flushed shaft was beneath my hungry mouth. My body shook every time Mace licked me but when I felt his tongue press inside of me, I let out a string of curses. My whole body felt so tight, I was sure it would snap in two. I managed to look up at Jonas who had pushed up on his elbows. I knew he could probably see what Mace was doing to me because his mouth was parted and he kept licking his lips. I kept my eyes on him and smiled when I saw his eyes jump to me as soon as I drew the tip of his cock inside of my mouth. Since I’d done this just this morning to Jonas, the newness of it didn’t frighten me anymore but I knew better than to try to take too much too fast. So I made up for my inability to deep throat him with intense suction.

Jonas thrust up into my mouth and I forced my throat to relax enough to take more of him in. Mace continued to torment my ass as I licked and sucked Jonas’s cock until he was fisting my hair to hold me in place but I couldn’t help but freeze when I felt cold lube replace the heat of Mace’s mouth on my hole. Jonas seemed to sense the change because he gently pulled himself free of my mouth and moved so that he was lying pressed up against my chest as he rolled me to my side.

“Cole,” I heard Mace say and I turned to look at him. He was on his knees, his glistening cock standing proud against his abdomen. “Do you want to keep going?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said and then I looked at Jonas. “Yes,” I repeated. Jonas smiled and kissed me. I focused on his mouth as Mace’s finger began to press against me. I flinched as my outer muscles gave way under the incessant pressure and the sting that followed had me inhaling sharply. I was glad when neither man asked me how I was doing because I was too ashamed to admit that I was struggling to adjust to Mace’s intrusion. How the hell was I ever going to manage it when it was Jonas’s cock?