A Walk in Heaven (11 page)

Peter nodded. “Yes, if you don’t mind. What do you think about women going along?”

Good grief, he really put her on the spot. Everyone appeared as if they couldn’t wait for her answer, all except one. She should have expected Joshua would scowl.

She shrugged. “Considering I have no idea what happens during the cattle drive, I’m reluctant to answer.”

Joshua cleared his throat. “Tell me, Careen,” he said as he wiped his mouth with his linen napkin. “Have you ever slept under the stars in a bedroll while a coyote howls in the distance as the stench of cattle drifts through the night air?”

She chuckled.
“Heavens no.”

“Would you ever want to?” he asked quickly.

“Well…” She hesitated, not knowing how to answer that one, either. “I’m not too worried about the stench but I don’t like the idea of wild animals attacking me no matter what time of the night or day it was.”

“What if there were no wild animals,” Gage added. “Would you consider it?”

“I’m not certain. How many nights would I have to sleep under the stars in a bedroll?”

“A week,” Gage answered.

“Unless we ran into trouble,” Joshua cut in, “then it would take longer.”

Careen noticed the glares Peter and Gage aimed toward their older brother. Curiosity got the better of her, and she wanted to know what their quarrel was about. From what she’d gathered, she suspected Joshua didn’t think a woman could handle a cattle drive.

“What kind of trouble?” she probed.

Joshua opened his mouth to reply, but Peter spoke first. “Don’t fret over that, Careen. We haven’t had any trouble with the cattle drive for years.”

“Although,” William lifted his glass of milk, “it’s always smart to be prepared.” He nodded then took a gulp.

Careen switched her focus to Elizabeth who was cutting the twins’ steak. “What do you think about it, Mrs. Grayson?”

The older woman grinned. “I’ve accompanied my husband several times during our marriage. I believe a woman must stand by her man no matter what the cost. Then again, I was raised with seven brothers, so sleeping outside for several nights never bothered me.”

William winked and patted his wife’s hand. “And we had such joyful memories, I might add.”

“However,” Elizabeth continued, “a young widow who has never been on a cattle drive may find it quite dangerous. At least when I went, I’d been doing that sort of thing before with my family – and I was married.”

Careen nodded. “I can see your point, Mrs. Grayson.”

“So,
Careen
, would you consider joining us for our next drive?” Peter asked.

Put on the spot once again, Careen wanted to tell them no, but then she also wanted them to think she fit in with the family. “Well, I declare, Peter, I haven’t thought of that idea at all. There would be much to do to get me ready. I fear I’d have to train night and day.”

“We wouldn’t let you sleep on the ground,” Gage added. “You could sleep in the cook’s wagon.”

“Y’all are serious?” she questioned, hoping they’d inform
her this
was just a joke.

“Yes we are, Careen. Our cook, Jackson, injured his hand the other day, and he’d appreciate having you along to help him prepare the meals.” Peter’s eyes twinkled, and Careen wondered if that certain trait ran in the family since she’d seen it with everyone except Joshua.

“Well, I think I’d have to really consider it, and if I do go, I would want another woman going with me.”

Elizabeth nodded.
“As you should, my dear.”

“Let me think it over for a few days and I’ll let you know,” Careen answered.

“Oh, definitely,” Gage said before shoveling a forkful of potatoes in his mouth.

From that point until dinner was over, she noticed the two younger brothers acted like proud peacocks, especially in front of Joshua. The older brother didn’t say much after that, and if he did, he grumbled. She received the distinct impression that the brothers might have made a bet between them to see if she’d go. Now she was extremely curious to know more about it. If that were so, she’d gladly give in just to put Joshua in his place. Apparently, he didn’t think she could handle it. He might be right, but she’d make sure she could handle it just to show him!

The men left the room, and she helped Elizabeth and one of the servants clean the table. When Careen volunteered to help with the dishes, the servant shooed her out of the kitchen and told her to visit with the family. Although she wanted to, she needed to be by herself for a moment. If she was seriously considering going on this cattle drive, she had to roll it around in her head a few times before making any rash decisions.

She walked out the front door and onto the porch. At the end of the porch was a two-seated swing. Not like the one in the tree the twins had been on earlier, but one that fastened to the base and to the porch. The craftsmanship of the swing reminded her of the baby toys the girls had shown her earlier. Careen wouldn’t be surprised if Joshua had made it as well.

She tested the swing before putting all her weight on the seat. It startled her when the swing moved with such ease. Leaning back, she relaxed and enjoyed the rhythm.

Slowly, the sun set in the horizon, highlighting orange and yellow clouds in the sky. A small wind brushed against her face and teased the curls by her ears. The chilly air had her gathering her shawl around her shoulders tighter. The bun she’d fashioned earlier today loosened, so she reached back and pulled out the pins, letting the bulk of her hair hang down her back and over her shoulders.

Closing her eyes, she listened to the night’s insects starting their lullaby. Off in the distance, a coyote howled. At first, she blinked her eyes open, her heart pounding with fear, but then she realized this was normal out here in Montana. If there were any danger, the Grayson brothers would keep her out of harm’s way. Strange, how she felt so protected being here.

The front door opened before Joshua sauntered out. He didn’t notice her, but continued toward the porch railing before stopping. Leaning on the rail, he gazed across the acres of Grayson land toward the purple and red sunset.

She should say something to him to make him aware of her presence, but then the quiet evening was too peaceful to interrupt. Not only that, she didn’t want to say anything that would make him irate. From what she could tell by his profile, he wasn’t upset at anything. Not yet, anyway.

Continuing to stare, she hadn’t realized she relaxed again and had started swinging. Not until the chains squeaked. Joshua straightened and spun toward her. Silently, she scolded herself for not thinking.

“I’m sorry,” he said quickly. “I didn’t know anyone was out here.”

She stopped swinging and sat up, folding her hands in her lap. “There’s no need to apologize. You didn’t disturb me. I should be the one apologizing for disturbing you. You appeared so peaceful a moment ago.”

His shoulders relaxed and he stepped toward her. “I’ve always enjoyed watching the sunset.”

“Wouldn’t you know, that’s exactly what I was
doing.
” She smiled. “Would you care to join me?” She pointed to the empty space next to her on the swing.

“No, that’s all right.”

“I won’t bite, Joshua.”

Chuckling, he walked closer. “I know, but I just don’t feel like swinging.” He sat on the edge of the railing. “So tell me, what are sunsets like in Charleston?”

She shrugged and leaned back again. “You know, it’s been so long, I’ve forgotten.”

“What about in Iowa?”

“They were all right, but just not the same. I had nobody to share them with.”

“Weren’t you staying with your aunt?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t you have any cousins?”

Bitterness gathered in her mouth just thinking about
that
cousin. “Yes, but not anyone close to me.” She moved her legs and started swinging again. “Joshua, can you answer a question for me?”

“Sure.”

“Well, I was thinking about the conversation at the table tonight and wondering why it was directed toward me?”

He folded his arms across his wide chest. The pleasant expression from a moment ago disappeared. “Do you really want to know?”

“Of course.
I wouldn’t have asked otherwise.”

“Earlier today my brothers and I were talking about the drive, and they were thinking about asking you to join us. I tried to talk them out of it.”

“Really?
Why would you want to do that?”

“Because I don’t think you can handle riding with rugged cowboys on a dusty and grueling trip. I tried to reason with them by explaining that you aren’t used to our way of life, therefore you wouldn’t go. They thought differently.”

“So you honestly don’t want me to go?” she asked.

“It’s not that, Careen.” He moved away from the porch and stepped closer. “I don’t think you’re up to riding with us. You’ve been raised a lady and so would not want to get your hands dirty, so-to-speak.”

He was right but it bothered her that he would say that. The tone in his voice wasn’t rude, yet something about his comment upset her.

Stubbornly, she lifted her chin. “What if I want to go?”

He arched an eyebrow. “Well, I’d think it would be my duty to try and talk you out of it.”

Oooh
, now he was really making her mad! “Don’t you believe I can do this? Don’t you think I would like to be given the chance?” She raised her voice as irritation built inside her.

He straightened and planted his hands on his hips. “If you really want to know the truth, I don’t want to have to watch you the whole time. I don’t want a
female
slowing us down.”

“Ah!” She jumped to her feet and stood right in front of him. Because he was so tall, she had to tilt her head to meet his eyes. “How dare you presume you’ll have to watch me like a
child.
I’ll have you know I can take care of myself.”

Even though his eyes narrowed in anger, his mouth turned up in a smirk. “Oh, so you
meant
to smoke everyone out of the house this morning in attempt to burn the place down?”

For the nerve!
She hissed, and without thinking, brought up her hand to slap his face, but he was too quick and grabbed her wrist before she could hit her target.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” he said in a low voice.

She would never react so violently, but with this man, all her good sense seemed to disappear like the last rays of the setting sun. “Then take back what you said.”

“I will if you’ll admit you can’t take care of yourself.”

“How dare you say
that!
Of course I can.”

“Careen,” he warned, but didn’t say anymore.

His words hurt like a knife in the chest, yet… Being
this close stirred butterflies
in her stomach. The longer he held her wrist, the more his expression softened. Even his gaze dropped to her mouth.

Her throat dried quickly as if cotton from the old south grew there. Slowly her anger disappeared, and a different emotion filled her – one that she wished wouldn’t have invaded her very being. It was as if this she’d never realized how ruggedly handsome he was until now. And when had his deep blue eyes become so hypnotizing? The longer she stared, the quicker her heart hammered out of control.