A Very Merry Superhero Wedding (Adventures of Lewis and Clarke) (6 page)

Chapter 5

JOE straightened his cuffs as he looked in the mirror. The alterations were perfect, no small feat for a man of his size. The last time he’d worn a tuxedo must’ve been the twins’ weddings about four years ago. He was pleasantly surprised. Tori would probably like this look.

The tailor at the tuxedo shop made a few adjustments and stepped back again, eyeing Joe critically from every angle. He finally nodded his head. “Good.”

Joe nodded back. “I’m sure my friends will be here any minute. Work must’ve kept them.”

The man nodded and returned to his station behind the curtain.

All of the Paladins in the various sectors of the city were taking shifts to patrol their own neighborhoods as well as to provide backup when one of them had a holiday event, or to give added protection to the worst areas of the city. Stretch’s team agreed to cover Joe’s team’s area during Joe’s wedding, and an older team offered to cover tonight when many of Joe’s friends would be at his bachelor party.

That didn’t explain where his non-superhero brother Carl was, though. Joe looked at his watch. Right as someone punched him hard in the arm. Joe turned to see his big brother coming in for another swing. They traded a few punches and fell into a backslapping hug that would’ve felled smaller men.

The sharp sound of a clearing throat cut short their greeting.

The tailor stood nearly a foot shorter than Joe, and must be easily sixty pounds lighter. But he had the same commanding presence as Joe’s old high school principal, Mr. Granger. Carl must’ve sensed it as well because he, too, stood up straight, hands to himself.

Joe whispered to his brother, “You’re late.”

“Kids,” Carl whispered back. “You can’t make them listen and you can’t trade them in.”

Joe snickered. When the tailor raised his eyebrow, Joe put on a more serious expression. Apparently, grooms were supposed to act more mature. He stood waiting for the tailor to tell him what to do.

The tailor appeared to be waiting for Joe to do something. He finally swished his hand at Joe. “You may take that off now
.
Carefull
y
.”

The rest of the men in the bridal party — Bull Kincaid, Mickey Valient, and Darian Johnson — all walked in together a few minutes later as the tailor adjusted Carl’s trousers.

“Hey, guys!” Joe called. “Where ya been?” He pointed to his watch. “Another time zone?”

Joe saw the tailor give Carl a menacing glare for waving. He stepped back. Safer to stand over here with his friends. “Hey, you guys better hurry,” he said quietly, shaking hands and doing fist bumps. “The little guy is getting perturbed.”

The men started toward the back room to find their tuxedos. Another loud throat-clearing stopped them in their tracks. That tailor could say more without saying anything. Joe tried not to smile.

While Carl’s tuxedo was tweaked—“What have you been eating?” Joe heard the tailor ask his brother—Joe asked the others about work.

“Aw, man,” said Darian, “there wer
e
fiv
e
muggings in Memorial Park last night. And those are just the ones that got away.”

“What happened?” Joe asked.

“Christmas party,” said Mickey with a scowl.

Joe frowned.

“Sector Eight had a team Christmas party,” Bull explained, “and J-Mac forgot to tell his Sector One team that they were to cover for them.”

“Irresponsible.” Mickey shook his head. “Someone could’ve been hurt.”

“But they weren’t,” Darian said soothingly. “We can’t be everywhere, neither can the police. One starfish at a time, buddy.” Darian slapped Mickey’s shoulder. “Who’s covering for us tonight?”

“Sector Eight,” Mickey grumbled.

Joe and Bull grinned at Mickey’s fresh scowl. The man was a perfectionist in the worst way, and a tough team leader as Tick Tock. But the three of them and Hayley Addison worked well together keeping Sector Seven safe from the worst of Double Bay’s crooks and criminals.

Darian slapped Mickey’s back and gave him a reassuring smile. He was a glass-mostly-full kind of guy and loved to compare their superhero work with the story about a guy saving starfish on a beach — we can’t save them all, but we can help as many as we can. Joe liked his attitude. Too bad he served with Sector Four. It would be fun to work together more often than just the high-crime Christmas season.

The tailor, finished with Carl, brought over three garment bags, handing them to each man without asking for names. Joe didn’t know how he could remember so many people’s names and faces. Must be a gift.

The man stared up at Darian. “I know your face, but the name isn’t right. You are related to Cesar Johnson, yes? Michigan Wolverines basketball?”

Darian grinned. “He’s my little brother.”

The tailor actually smiled. “Excellent player. How is his knee?”

“He’s walking again. Beat the odds. Got hired a few months ago by a high school south of Ann Arbor to teach English and coach basketball.”

The tailor beamed at Darian and clasped his arm briefly. “That is wonderful news. Blessings on your family.” Then the stern expression returned. “Now dress, all of you.” He swished his hand toward the curtained area.

In between the trying on, the final adjustments, and the tailor letting out a button on Carl’s tuxedo jacket—“No more cookies unti
l
afte
r
the wedding,” scolded the tailor—Joe told the guys about the morning’s terrifying events.

“There I was, staring Tori’s dad, Danny Lewis, in the eye
—
as Superhero
X
!” Joe wiped his hand across his eyes. “What if he recognized me?”

“Did he?” asked Carl.

Joe shrugged. “I don’t know. But if he says something to Tori…”

“I was there, man,” said Darian, “and the guy had the same shell-shocked expression everybody does when they’re being robbed. He didn’t recognize you.”

“I can’t let any of her family know until she knows,” Joe said. “I’m just saying, we’ve got to be careful.”

“So tell her, already,” said Mickey.

“I’m going to,” Joe heard his voice rising with a defensive ring. “As soon as I’m sure she…that she…” He rubbed his chest, unsure how to put it in words.

“You want to be sure she loves you for you
,
Jo
e
, before she has to decide what she thinks about X,” Carl stated, as if it were obvious.

Joe glanced at him in surprise.

“I get it, brother,” Carl said. “You want to make sure the glue has hardened before you have to test it.”

Joe nodded. “But Dad’s not…”

“He may be a superhero, but he’s also a pastor with a whole other agenda of things he thinks are important. And he’s our dad. You know he’s gotta be feeling protective.”

Joe raised his eyebrows. “No, actually, I hadn’t thought of that. I thought he was acting tough as the head of the Paladin’s Guild.”

“That, too,” Mickey said with a firm nod.

Carl clapped Joe on the back. “When you have kids, you’ll understand. I’m beginning to get it now after thirteen years of being someone’s dad. I think parents are always a little messed up in the head. There’s more second-guessing going on up here,” Carl tapped his temple, “than a squirrel trying to cross a four-lane road.”

Carl was the only married one of the group. Even though he didn’t have powers, Joe’s oldest brother had always been a fount of wisdom in just about everything Joe had ever needed to learn. If Carl understood why Joe was feeling nervous about explaining his family to his fiancé, then Joe must not be completely out of line.

“Or you could not get married,” Mickey said.

Joe glared at him.

“What? I’m just stating the obvious. I’m sure I’m not the only one thinking it.” Mickey looked around at the others but no one would meet his eye.

“You love her, marry her,” Bull said, folding his arms over his chest. “Everything else will work out.”

Joe took a deep breath. “Okay, so tonight, we need to make sure no one gets too drunk and forgets that they’re in public — or forgets that Tori’s brother will be with us. Agreed?”

“Relax, man,” Darian slapped his back. “It’s just a bachelor party.”

JOE’S friends had arranged for a private room at the back of a local sports bar. Most everyone had already arrived. Driving over had taken longer than usual because the long-awaited snow had finally started to fall. People were driving as if they couldn’t remember what to do when the white stuff came down.

As Joe walked in, a loud chorus of yells and whistles and raucous cheering filled the air. The dark wood tables were already covered with pizzas, hot wings, chips and salsa, mozzarella sticks, and pitchers of beer. His younger brother Stuart and Tori’s brother Kevin stood at the door collecting car keys in empty French fry baskets.

Joe’s friends came over, slapping him on the back, ribbing him about his rush to get married, and talking animatedly about the Notre Dame football game on one of the televisions. Joe saw basketball on another television, and his brother Eddie was up on a chair trying to change a golf channel on a third TV. A waitress in a short skirt laughingly told him to get down.

Yup, it was gonna be a good night.

Joe shucked his coat, took the beer his brother Eddie handed him, and grabbed a slice of pizza with everything. As soon as the Notre Dame game hit half-time, his friends crowded around the entrance to the room. Joe started to walk over to see what was going on, but Bull pulled him back.

“Hold on there, buddy.” Bull grinned at him and folded his arms over his chest. “Just watch.”

Music beat heavily from the direction of one of the food tables. A moment later, the crowd of men parted in a riot of whistles and calls. A beautiful young woman dressed in what appeared to be only a Norte Dame football jersey sauntered in toward Joe.

Darian pulled up a chair in the center of the room and several hands forced Joe to sit. He groaned and laughed and didn’t put up too much of a protest.

The girl danced around him for a minute, then began pulling off her jersey. Joe assumed she must have something on underneath since it was a public place, but he wasn’t prepared for the University of Michigan cheerleader uniform. The hooting and hollering got louder. He hoped the Wolverine fans wouldn’t start knocking around the rival Fighting Irish fans.

The girl had fantastic abs. The thought had barely formed when she did a backwards flip in front of him. She broke into a suggestive cheer that fit the occasion and proceeded to shimmy and shake in a most delightful way.

Suddenly some guy Joe didn’t know reached out and grabbed at her. She was in the middle of a cheerleading move so he didn’t get a good hold before she jumped away.

Joe was out of his chair a second later, but two of his friends had already gotten between the newcomer and the dancer.

The guy called out something crass. Obviously drunk, if the slurring and smell were any indication.

“This is a private party,” Carl said, reaching his hand out to turn the guy toward the door.

“Get your hands off me,” the guy’s voice got ugly and he pushed Carl.

Joe stepped up just as a few more unknowns broke through the crowded doorway. “Now that’s enough,” he said firmly.

Eddie stepped to Carl’s other side. The three brothers were lumberjack-huge, Hannah always said. Joe knew they made an imposing barrier.

Apparently not imposing enough for the heavily inebriated. One of drunk #1’s cohorts swung at Eddie who easily ducked. Darian, behind him, didn’t see the swing coming until it almost landed. He moved enough to take it on the shoulder. As he spun, Darian swung his leg out wide to trip the guy.

As in, swung his le
g
wa
y
out. Not all of his friends were superheroes, and Joe didn’t want anyone — especially Tori’s brother — asking questions about strange things they thought they saw. He needed to stop thi
s
no
w
.

“No, guys, let’s just—” That was all he got out.

He ducked a punch and looked around for the girl. She was safely surrounded by the younger brothers and Mickey. Though Mickey was rolling up his sleeves.